Clementine (12 page)

She could feel the tension building deep within her and she knew he was about to push her over the edge. Just a few more moments and she’d be tumbling into complete bliss. Suddenly, Holden’s hips stopped moving against her and the abrupt absence of his tantalizing movements made her want to scream. 
Ahhh… don’t stop.

“I said I was going to make you pay for that little incident at the telescope, but on second thought...I think I like this better,” he spoke nuzzling her neck and gently biting her earlobe.
 

She’d never been with a man like Holden before. As his words sunk in, and she felt the pool of lust continuing to
build within her, she knew she would never be the same. She was crazy for this man. It took only two more slow grinds before Addison’s body began to shudder and she lost control completely. On some level Addison knew she was digging her nails into Holden’s back, crying his name, and lifting her hips to meet his. On some level she also knew that she could never go back to the way they were after this night. In that moment Holden was as intrinsic to Addison as the skin over her bones and the blood coursing through her veins.

Chapter 9

Addison woke the next morning
to an empty bed and small note resting on the pillow next to her.

He’s sorry about last night?
Addison didn’t know what to make of the letter. She tried to remember when he had left last night. She remembered him rubbing her back and she must have drifted off. She guessed he had slipped out after that.
Why is he apologizing for last night? Is he having second thoughts? It was the best night of my life.
She ran her hands through her hair, a sinking feeling beginning to develop in her stomach. Her mom was driving up to Austin that day to help her pack up and move her things back to Houston. She tore the sheets off her bed so she could wash them before packing them away. She kept herself busy packing last minute items and finishing her laundry. She couldn’t pinpoint the feeling of dread in her stomach, it could’ve just been nerves from starting a new chapter in her life, but she couldn’t shake it as the morning whipped by. Her mother arrived an hour later and together, the women loaded up their two cars with all of Addison’s belongings.

“Sweetie, want to stop to grab dinner on the way home?” It was already early evening by the time they had finished loading up.

“Actually mom, I have to stop by the hospital really quick to say goodbye to Holden,” Addison answered
dejectedly. She’d given her mom constant updates about her growing “friendship” with the man so Addison’s reply didn’t surprise her.

Vickie gave her an encouraging smile, “Okay, well be careful driving and I’ll see you at home. Maybe I’ll have Dad pick up your favorite takeout?” She
offered before hopping in her car.

Addison pulled into the hospital parking lot
, looking at her phone one last time. The past few weeks she and Holden had texted and talked constantly so it made her even more nervous that her phone had been silent all day. She walked through the front entrance of the hospital, deciding to postpone the inevitable and check up on Sue first. She’d kept her promise to visit the older woman every week, and had the pleasure of delivering her quite a few bouquets from her bridge partner.

She walked down the hallway toward Sue’s room but didn’t find her name on the
laminated list next to the door. She peeked her head through the tiny window only to find the bed empty and fully made; no sign of Sue to be found. Addison turned and found a nurse sitting at her station typing away at a computer.

Oh no, oh no, oh no.

“Excuse me, what happened to Sue?”

“Oh, she was discharged today,” The nurse answered
nonchalantly.

Addison sighed at the
nurse’s answer before thanking her and walking away. She shook her head, laughing at how quickly her thoughts had turned to the worst scenario.
Good for you Sue. At least one of us got our man,
she thought. Her nerves hadn’t settled down like she’d hoped and she couldn’t shake them off as she headed toward the opposite end of the hospital, hoping to find Holden in the Neurology and Spine ward.

With each step she felt her heart rate increase and her stomach become more and more queasy.
What do I expect him to do? Beg me to stay? Drop his residency and go to North Carolina with me? Last night doesn’t change the fact that we aren’t technically dating.

             
She ran her hand through her long hair as she pushed the doors open, stepping into the neurology ward of the hospital. She only took two steps through the door before stopping dead in her tracks.
I should have gone home right away. I should have gone to dinner with my mom,
she thought as her eyes found Holden with his arm wrapped around a sickeningly-beautiful brunette. The woman giggled at something he said and reached her arm around to hug him, closing the space between them. Their posture was too intimate for her to be a patient’s family member. No, she was something much more than that. She took in the beauty of the girl whose touch on Holden was anything but business-like. Addison felt the life seep out of her in that moment. Her stomach clenched into a tight ball and she stood rooted in time as she comprehended the fact that for the last few weeks she’d completely deluded herself into thinking her situation with Holden was anything other than a platonic friendship. They’d been inseparable the past few weeks but she now realized that in his eyes she fell under the veil of friendship. With the exception of his lack of judgment last night, he’d never pursued her as anything more than a friend. He was the complete package and there wasn’t a single woman in that hospital who wouldn’t throw herself at him. Addison had just been caught in the crossfire. She was naīve in thinking she could play in a league she hadn’t quite belonged in.

The brunette said
something to Holden and he shook his head playfully. He turned to enter a room and the woman began making her way toward where Addison was standing.
Oh, god I don’t want to see her up close.
Addison knew she had to leave; she had to pick up her feet and move them one at a time until she was back at her car, but she couldn’t make her body respond. The woman stopped just short of Addison and leaned over to speak with a nurse. Addison could just barely make out what she was saying.

“Can you arrange it so Dr. Taylor has a free afternoon? I’m taking him out to lunch,” She woman cooed.

The nurse looked up at her confused, her brows furrowed. “Umm… that’s not really how it works…”

“Well, he’ll be taking a long lunch. I haven’t seen him in
far too long and we need to do
quite
a bit of catching up.”
Since their date two months ago?

“Oh Addison, what brings you to our hospital today?”

Addison turned at the sound of Stacy’s voice and slightly cringed. Her old classmate made her way over with fakest smile she’d ever seen. “I guess you saw that gorgeous girl wrapped around Dr. Taylor?” She asked, nodding in the brunette’s direction. When Addison didn’t make a move to speak, Stacy continued.

“
She was the same girl that he was with the other week,” she tilted her head to the side, her sympathetic expression doing a poor job of covering her vindictive tone. “They’re just so cute together.”

Addison took a deep
breath, finally finding her movement and voice all at once.

“
Oh, Fuck off, Stacy.”

She turned on her hee
l, forcing herself to look away from the beautiful brunette and the horrible situation she’d stumbled upon. She concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other as she walked out of the hallway, out of the ward, and out of the hospital. She felt her heart building walls around the millions of shards that had once been held together by the man she was walking away from forever.

Time to move on.

(♫5)
Addison got in her car
, shoved the note Holden had left on her pillow into her glove box, and drove to Houston without looking back. She had known from the beginning that Holden wasn’t the type of guy to date a girl like her. He was beautiful and captivating.
Not to mention he repairs people’s spines for Christ sakes
. Knowing this still didn’t prevent her mind from replaying their encounters from the past few months. The early morning kayak trips and the show at the comedy club, the hilarious night he’d attempted to teach her to play darts at a pub, and the time they went to the animal shelter just to play with the dogs. He had never asked her out on an official date. Sure, he’d paid for their meals when they went out to eat, but he’d never called them dates. She thought back to dozens of times he could have made a move but he’d kept his distance.

She’d
played out how the night before was meant to happen in her mind countless times. In her dreams Holden would finally come to his senses and see her standing in front of him, mad with love for him. They would’ve lounged together all morning. He’d brew two cups of coffee and she’d whip up French toast. He’d give her the comics section of the morning paper without her even having to ask. She’d read him the funniest ones while he browsed through the news.

Unfortunately, she hadn’t taken the time to prepare herself for the sadness of waking up to find her bed empty and the heart wrenching image of Holden’s arms around another woman.

I’m glad I’m moving away
, she told herself, glad to have an excuse to run from Holden before he had the chance to really hurt her. She knew that what she’d seen that day in the hospital was a small taste of what she’d have to deal with if she tried to love a man like Holden.
At least I didn’t sleep with him.

When she made it to her house in Houston
she was relieved to find her favorite Chinese take-out and a movie already loaded in the DVD player. It was the perfect ending to a day she never wanted to experience again. She let her mind go numb as she sat watching the movie tucked close to her mom, feeling like a little kid after a bad day at school. Her mom was always able to make her feel loved and that night was no exception. She wanted to wrap herself into a little ball and let her mom fight all of her battles.
If only.
Later that night she reluctantly checked her phone and found two missed calls and a text from Holden.

Addison rolled her eyes, deciding then and there to not text him back. She didn’t want to come off as a jealous girl and she couldn’t seem to push her pride out of the way enough to tell him how she really was feeling.
He said it himself hadn’t he
?
“
I’m sorry if things got out of hand last night. I had no intentions of any of that happening when I followed you upstairs
”.

Well good maybe I didn’t
want it to happen either.
Alone in her room her tears finally fell. She finally succumbed to the overwhelming emotions attempting to vie their way out of her. She pulled her blanket up to her neck and let the sadness of the day surround her. She didn’t even notice Holden’s second text.

Holden called everyday for a week
and Addison ignored each one. She didn’t want to hear what he had to say about the girl she saw him with. He would want to share the details of his new love with his
pal
, and Addison didn’t think she could listen to him talk about her without crumbling back into a million pieces. After that first week, she finally decided to text him back, if only to avoid having to test her will power if he continued to try to contact her.