Clay's Hope (3 page)

She didn’t say anything until she stood next
to the hood.

“We weren’t officially introduced last
night. My name’s Gabby. Gabrielle May Winters.”

I straightened and turned toward her. The
sun glinted off her hair as she stood there with her hands in her
pockets. She was such a tiny thing, looking up at me, studying me
with her wide brown eyes. My response died before I opened my
mouth; being so close to her robbed me of what I’d been thinking.
Instead, I wondered if she liked what she saw. Last night’s
reaction made me doubt it.

“Sam said that your name is Clay.”

She’d talked to Sam about me? My pulse
leapt. That was good, right?

“Listen, Clay, I know you think I’m the one
for you...”

The direction of her thinking made it hurt
to breathe. I knew what she was getting at. She didn’t believe she
was my Mate. She continued as if she hadn’t just verbally kicked me
between the legs.

“I don’t have a sense of smell to depend on,
like you do. Although the Elders say to trust the instinct of
werewolves, I don’t trust blindly. I really want to go home. If I
asked to borrow someone else’s car, would it live?”

I turned back to the truck to hide my pain.
According to what I’d heard, she’d been living with Sam for years,
learning our ways. Why couldn’t she understand that I wouldn’t give
her up? Without seeing what I was doing, I lifted the ratchet.

“Ok. I’ll take that as a no,” she
mumbled.

Her understanding made me hopeful, and I
turned back to her.

“Clay, I’m not trying to be rude here, but
I’m struggling to figure us out. What’s the plan?”

She knew I had a plan? Panic had me
scrambling for the words to defend my actions. She didn’t give me
time, though.

“Am I just supposed to stay here until you
decide I’m not really your Mate?” she asked softly.

Ouch. Any relief I would have felt over her
not knowing about the leaves left with her continued, brutal denial
of our connection. She wrinkled her nose and sighed slightly.
Scenting the air, I found a thread of frustration.

“Would it help speed things along if we
spent a little time together?”

The abrupt change in her thinking left me
stunned. Hell, yes, I wanted to spend time together. A ripple of
excitement coursed over the skin of my arms, and I hoped she didn’t
notice as she stared at me expectantly, waiting for an answer. I
didn’t trust myself not to say just that, so I shrugged. I didn’t
want to seem too overeager.

“Do you talk?”

My heart stopped. Hadn’t I been? I thought
back. Nope. Not a word. She’d think me stupid, now. What could I
say? Cringing, I turned away toward the truck and struggled to come
up with something that didn’t end with “don’t leave.”

“Ok. No talking. Got it.”

Shit.

Maybe silence was better, anyway.
Desperation had me about three seconds from begging. For what, I
didn’t know. Probably for any scrap of affection she’d willingly
surrender to me. Yeah, it’d be better if I just kept my mouth
shut.

She sighed, pulled her hands from her back
pockets, and leaned against the truck. Chin in hands, she watched
me as I pretended to know what I was doing to the truck.

“You seemed to like the idea of spending
time to get to know each other,” she said.

I turned toward her again. How could I not?
Her voice, her face, everything about her called to me.

“But what’s the point in spending time
together if you don’t want to talk to me? Isn’t the point to get to
know one another?”

Oh, I wanted to talk, but I doubted she
wanted to know how lonely I’d been or how I felt now that I’d found
her. Or that I understood having trust issues. Disgusted with
myself, I turned back to the truck. Yeah, I really needed to keep
quiet or my insecurities would have her running.

Then, she sighed and straightened away from
the truck. I almost broke when she walked back to the main
entrance. What would she do if I called her back? Probably beg me
to let her leave. I couldn’t have that. Not yet. She hadn’t given
us, or the idea of us, a chance.

I stayed by the truck, trying to figure out
what to do next. Puking seemed like an option. It still felt like
she’d kicked me between the legs.

Patience, I reminded myself. I needed to
give her time to adjust to the idea. She was right. She wasn’t like
werewolves. She had no sense of smell to help her. She felt the
pull, though. I was sure of it. That meant she’d be back. It had
to.

The sun slowly trekked across the sky as I
doggedly worked on the truck. There wasn’t anything else to do
while I waited. When the door opened again and her scent reached
me, I exhaled in relief. She stepped out, and I studied her from
the corner of my eye. Her damp hair was free of leaves, and she
wore a pair of cotton shorts and a tank top.

She started walking across the gravel in her
bare feet. I turned and watched her approach. Just seeing her
coming toward me eased some of the doubt that had crept into my
head.

I frowned as Gabby winced with each hurried
step. Then, I looked at the gravel surrounding the truck. I wanted
her to stay and talk but she wouldn’t be able to do that without
shoes. I studied her, wondering if she would let me pick her up to
sit her on the truck. I doubted it. I used my foot to clear a spot,
pulled the rag from my pocket, shook it out, and set it on the
ground. It was dirty, but it was better than standing on the
gravel.

She took the last few steps and stood on the
rag with a sigh. The dash across the gravel had set her pulse
racing loudly.

“Thanks,” she said, looking up at me and
sounding breathless. Her light brown eyes sparkled in the light. My
gut clenched with the pull, and I itched to touch her but noticed
her anxious scent.

“Sam just told me that you’re to be confined
to a room for the remainder of the day. With me.”

I frowned, trying to think of a reason why
the Elders were interfering. I’d done everything they’d asked of
me. Sam had acknowledged my Claim. They had no right to upset her
by forcing her to spend time with me.

“They want to see how we react to each other
so they can determine if you really do have a Claim to me.” She
spoke quickly as if hurrying to share a secret.

If I had a Claim to her? Sam had
acknowledged me. I growled, frustrated.

“What? You don’t want to spend time with
me?” she said, sounding surprised.

Not spend time with her? I looked down so
she wouldn’t see just how badly I wanted that. Though I wanted it,
I wanted her to spend time with me willingly. Not through
force.

“You do want to spend time with me, don’t
you?” Her soft, uncertain words had me opening my mouth. At the
last second, I closed it and shrugged, unable to give her the real,
desperate answer.

“So, it’s not me. Don’t you like being
indoors?”

I would go anywhere she was, but I couldn’t
say that either. I kept silent and met her gaze hoping she’d
understand it wasn’t her.

“Ok. If it’s not me and not being indoors,
then what?”

She didn’t let me guess where she was going
for long.

“You don’t want to be told when or how to
spend time with me. You don’t want someone telling you what to do.
Is that right?”

Wrong. But I could see this wasn’t about me.
It was about her. I studied her, waiting for her to say what she
needed to say.

“Yeah, me either.”

She didn’t want to be told what to do. Was
she afraid being my Mate would mean we would start telling her what
to do? No one would. Not even me. But that didn’t mean I had to let
her go. It just meant I needed to give her space and time.

She stepped off the rag, bent down to pick
it up, shook it out, and handed it to me.

“I lied to you, Clay. I thought maybe if you
knew how it felt to have your choices taken from you, you’d
understand why I want to leave. It’s nothing personal.”

This was about last night and about the
truck. Her honesty didn’t make her plea to leave less painful. How
could I give her what she wanted yet give us a chance?

I took the rag and turned back to the truck,
thinking quickly as I picked up a ratchet and started to loosen yet
another bolt.

“Your instincts say I’m the one. I don’t
have those instincts. Instead, I just keep thinking how I don’t
even know you. And the little bit Sam’s told me...that you spend
most of your time in your fur...well, it doesn’t help me understand
how there can be anything between us. I have no fur. I can’t just
run off into the woods with you.

“I’ve enrolled in college—one I
chose—despite Sam’s opposition. Do you know why I picked it?
Because it was far enough away that I knew it’d be harder for
people to tell me what to do. Major decisions, up until this point,
have been made by others based on what they thought would be best
for me. Sure, they ask me what I think and try to consider it, but
not always. How do you think Sam got me to Introductions for the
past two years? It wasn’t by asking me each time if I felt like
going.”

Sam forced her? This wasn’t good.

“I don’t mean to sound heartless. I’ve been
through enough Introductions to know what they mean to your kind.
I’m not trying to throw your traditions back in your face. I’m just
asking for some compromise. Don’t ask me to forget the one thing
I’ve chosen on my own.

“If you’re serious about me, then come to
the city with me and learn while I learn. We can get to know each
other.”

Hell, yes!

“I need that in order to even consider the
possibility of us. I know I’m asking a lot. You’d need to start
talking, stop growling, and bathe. No offense meant, but you look
like a crazy man the way you are.”

Damn. That hurt. But she’d struck on an
idea. A better plan started to take shape, and I hid my smile.

“I know it wouldn’t be easy on you. You’ll
be surrounded by people. It’ll probably be uncomfortable after
you’ve been on your own for so long. But we’d be able to spend time
together, to get to know each other—the normal, human way—and see
how things go. We’d both be giving a little, then. Well, you’d be
giving a little more, but...will you think about it?”

There was nothing to consider.

As she walked away, I eyed the truck,
thinking of everything I would need to do to be human.

* * * *

It was late by the time I thought I had all
the pieces back where they belonged. I made my way into the main
building, heading toward the kitchen first. The place was deserted,
but as usual, Charlene had something for a quick meal in the
refrigerator. I wolfed down the meatloaf sandwich in four bites
then pushed through the double-doors and walked the halls to
Gabby’s apartment.

Before I knocked, I listened for any sign
someone was awake. After several moments of hearing nothing, I
knocked lightly, not wanting to wake her. Inside, I heard movement.
Sam didn’t make me wait long before he opened the door.

“Need the keys,” I said.

Sam looked me over with bleary eyes, then
shuffled over to the counter to pick up his keys.

“You’ve decided to let her go?” he asked,
handing them over.

Not likely. I debated what to tell Sam. I
was still mad at him for the role he’d played in getting Gabby
here.

“We came to an agreement,” I said.

“Really?”

“She said I should live with her, get to
know her.”

Sam’s tired air disappeared.

“Did she now?”

“She did. But she thought she was scaring me
away by saying it.” I lifted the keys. “I’ll bring these back in a
bit.”

He nodded, and I left, taking the keys
outside. The truck started fine, and the rumble of the engine
brought a smile to my face. It had less of a rattle now. I turned
it off and went back inside.

Sam must have stayed up because he answered
the door before I knocked. He looked just as beat and could barely
keep his eyes open.

I handed him the keys.

“Don’t tell her I spoke.”

I waited until he nodded then I left
again.

Outside, I swiped my hair back from my face
and considered my next move. I needed to keep her guessing. If she
didn’t know what I had planned, she couldn’t say no. I stripped
from the clothes, tossed them on the porch, then took off in my
fur, heading south to Sam’s place.

Everyone knew where the Elders lived. They
belonged to all of us, not just the packs. They were there to help.
I’d never asked for help, and I wouldn’t start now; but I wasn’t
going there for help, anyway.

Now that Sam had acknowledged my Claim and
knew Gabby had invited me to college with her, he’d take her back
home. That played right into my plan. To show her I had no interest
in telling her what to do or stopping her from attending a school
she’d chosen, I wouldn’t approach her again until after she moved.
But, that didn’t mean I planned to ignore her for the summer. I
meant to study my Mate in a setting familiar to her.

So I made my way to Sam’s place, taking my
time as I traveled. The trees and fields gave way to roads and
houses then city blocks.

People in town weren’t friendly to my kind.
They tended to yell “get” at me as if I were a dog. I ignored them,
kept moving, and slowly closed the distance between Gabby’s home
and me. As towns grew closer together, I traveled at night, keeping
to the shadows.

Seven days after leaving the Compound, I
found Sam’s yellow house. I sat in the shadow of a tree across the
street in a neighbor’s back yard. The spot afforded me a view of
Sam’s picture window.

Gabby walked into the room, carrying a bag
on her shoulder. I only got a fleeting glimpse as she passed, but
it was enough to resurrect the feelings of hope. I’d have a family
again. She just needed time.