Christmas on 4th Street (Fool's Gold Romance) (15 page)

He wasn’t sure if she was asking or telling, but he nodded anyway.

“You’re working for Noelle at The Christmas Attic. That must be a change.”

“It is.”

“Your military service must be satisfying, but extremely difficult. There are demands on the medical personnel. We talk about the PTSD the returning soldiers deal with, as we should. But you and those like you have your own internal struggles.”

“Compassion fatigue,” he said flatly.

“Yes. I’ve read about it. What you see, what you do, drains the soul. I hope you will find your stay here healing.” She smiled gently. “I wouldn’t presume to know what you’ve been through, Gabriel, but if you need someone to talk to, I have names.”

“I’m okay.”

She studied him for a second. “I think you aren’t just yet, but you will be.”

Jo appeared with their coffees. The mugs were tall and slender and made of glass. Whipped cream floated on the top. She set down the drinks. “I was heavy-handed with the whiskey.”

The mayor sighed. “You always were a good girl, Jo.”

Jo laughed. “That’s me. The best of the best.”

When she’d left, Mayor Marsha raised her mug. “To the holidays and being with those we love.”

He touched his glass to hers. “To family.”

“I have a beautiful granddaughter and two great-grandchildren,” she said. “And a grandson-in-law. I’m blessed. I understand your family is here now.”

“They’re visiting for the holidays.”

Her eyebrows rose. “Are they? I was under the impression they were thinking of a more permanent move. Maybe I misunderstood.”

Gabriel suspected the wily old lady didn’t misunderstand very much, which meant she had information he didn’t. His parents moving to Fool’s Gold? Was it possible? He tried to imagine what Gideon would think about it and couldn’t. Although he and his brother were twins, they were no longer close. Gideon had changed so much, he might welcome having family nearby.

“Noelle is very sweet,” she said, before sipping her drink.

Was that it? Did the mayor want to warn him away from Noelle? He turned the idea over in his head and found he was pleased that she had someone looking out for her. With no family around, she was on her own. He knew she had a lot of friends, but he wanted even more people on her side.

“She is.”

“The store is very special. But if you decide not to stay in the army, I don’t see you finding yourself in retail.”

“That’s true. It’s a nice break, though.”

“I’m sure it is. But you’re a doctor. It is in you to heal. Fool’s Gold’s new hospital is nearly complete. A state-of-the-art facility with a world-class trauma center.”

The statement was so unexpected, he was sure he looked like an idiot staring at her. “You want to talk to me about a job?”

“I want you to consider the possibilities. You might think we’re a sleepy little town, but we have more than our share of trauma victims. There are car accidents and sports injuries on the mountain in both winter and summer. We’ve already assembled an excellent team, including Dr. Simon Bradley. He’s a plastic surgeon who specializes in burn victims. We’re putting together a program to bring in patients from all over the world. Many of them will be from poor countries. We’re raising the money to help them here. It’s exciting work.”

“I’m not a surgeon.”

“Yes, I know. However your services are still very much needed. I would like you to meet some of the other doctors here in town. Get to know them. We’re also in the preliminary stages of putting together a search-and-rescue organization. We’re thinking that will launch in 2015. You would be a vital member of that team.”

He hadn’t seen it coming. An offer like this. Stay here? In Fool’s Gold?

“I can’t,” he said, coming to his feet.

“You don’t have to decide now,” she told him, still calm, still holding his gaze with hers.

But he wasn’t calm. His chest was tight and he felt the walls closing in on him. In the distance was the rushing sound of chaos, of the wounded. Only the mayor continued to smile at him. Which meant the only fiery noise was in his head and he had to get out of here.

“Thank you, but no,” he said, grabbing his coat.

“Of course. If you change your mind, I’m very easy to find.”

He nodded and bolted for the door. Before he got there, she called him again.

“Gabriel?”

Reluctantly, he turned back to face her.

“Tell Noelle to call me and I can help her find the very best trees.”

He swore under his breath. How had the old lady known about their tree search? How did she—

He didn’t care, he told himself as he ducked out into the night. The snow came down harder than before. It piled up on the sidewalks and coated the parked cars. It was the kind of night that drove most men indoors.

Not him, he thought as he shrugged into his coat. Tonight he would walk until he was too exhausted to remember anything. To do anything but fall into a bed and sleep without dreaming at all.

* * *

“You’re pouting,” Noelle said as Gabriel turned the truck at the stop sign.

“I’m not pouting,” he growled, keeping his gaze on the road.

“It seems like you are. And if that’s how you’re going to be, then take me back to town and I’ll drive to the trees myself.”

He continued through the intersection, then pulled to the side of the road. After putting the truck in Park, he turned to face her.

“You wouldn’t get ten feet up the mountain,” he pointed out.

“You don’t know that.”

One corner of his mouth turned up. “I’d take a bet on it.”

He looked tired, she thought, taking in the shadows under his eyes. He’d been quiet all morning, even as he’d given her the message to call Mayor Marsha about their tree search. They’d waited until Melissa arrived to head out, but he’d never seemed very happy about what they were doing.

“Aren’t you sleeping?” she asked, then took his injured hand in hers. His stitches were gone and the skin had mostly healed. “Does this still hurt?”

“I’m fine. I was out late last night.”

He’d gone out after he’d dropped her off? “Oh,” she said quietly, wondering where he’d gone and who he’d been with.

“Hey,” he said, touching her cheek. “Mayor Marsha dragged me to some bar for Irish coffee. That’s how I got the message for you to call her.”

“Are you mad about the trees? You’ve been really great to me and I don’t want to make you do something you don’t want to do.”

“I said I’d help.”

“I know that, but I need you to help from a place of joy.”

He turned back to face the front window, folded his arms across the steering wheel, then rested his head on them. He murmured something that sounded a lot like “Kill me now,” but she wasn’t exactly sure that was it.

“Gabriel?”

“A place of joy?” His voice was incredulous.

“Yes. It’s Christmas, or nearly. We’re going out into the woods to find the perfect tree, where I know it will be waiting for us. It’s snowing and beautiful and we need to have a spirit of joy.”

He turned to look at her, his expression more bemused than annoyed. “You never would have made it as a lawyer.”

“I have a feeling you’re right about that.” Or she would have gotten very good at being a lawyer and lost the wonder she felt as she looked at the soft, white snow settling all around them.

How would her life have been different if she hadn’t gotten sick? It wasn’t a question she allowed herself to think about very much. Would she have married Jeremy? At the time she would have said yes. That he was the one. But he hadn’t stood by her and he hadn’t been willing to see her as more than damaged goods. He’d walked away so easily, she’d started to wonder if he’d ever loved her at all.

Gabriel straightened. “I can’t do the spirit of joy but I can manage an attitude of acceptance. Good enough?”

“Sure. We’ll find your joy along the way.”

“I didn’t think it was missing.”

He put the truck back in Drive and pulled out onto the road. Noelle got out the directions the mayor had given her and told him to turn at the private road three miles up Mother Bear Road.

“As long as we don’t run in to the namesake,” he muttered.

“She’s hibernating. Bears hibernate.”

“You’d better be right about that.”

They turned at the corner and then continued up the mountain. Gabriel kept track of the distance. The road had been recently plowed and they traveled easily, but when she pointed to the private road, everything changed.

Here the snow was thick and the truck moved sluggishly through the growing drifts.

“You sure about this?” he asked. “If it snows much more, we’re going to get stuck.”

She looked at the paper with the instructions. “It’s less than a quarter mile to the cabin. From there, we walk.”

“There’s a cabin?”

“Yes, for emergencies. The city owns it. Or maybe the county. The mayor says it’s kept stocked for when people get lost. She said we go directly east from the cabin for a few hundred yards and then we’ll find the trees.” She stared up at the sky. “The snow is letting up. It’s a sign.”

“Lucky us.”

She ignored him and watched for the cabin. When she saw it and pointed, Gabriel nodded. He turned the truck so they were facing out, then they bundled into their coats, scarves and gloves and stepped out of the cab.

The first thing she noticed was the stillness. There was only the sound of their footsteps crunching in the snow. All around them was pristine wilderness. Bare trees, naked bushes and smooth, fresh snow. There weren’t even animal tracks. The cabin was dark and silent, with snow on the roof and drifts piled up nearly to the windows.

“It’s like we’re the only two living creatures in the world,” she said with a sigh. “It’s so beautiful.”

“Yes, it is.”

She turned to smile at him, only to find he was looking at her with anything but amusement. There was an intensity in his blue eyes, a flash of hunger that had her wanting to step toward him. But then he blinked and it was gone.

Tree first, she told herself, trying to sound mentally stern. Man-seduction later.

“Okay,” she said, pulling out her directions. “We go east.”

Gabriel pointed. “That way.”

She was going to ask how he knew, but figured she’d been enough of a pain, dragging him out here in the first place. Besides, it’s not as if she had some innate sense of direction.

“Lead on,” she told him when he’d collected the ax and some rope from the back of the truck.

They made slow progress through the deep snow. Noelle quickly realized there was no way she could have done this herself. Just getting out here would have been a challenge and it wasn’t as if she knew how to chop down a tree. Maybe she should have gone with one of the ones in town, she thought, then pressed her lips together. She must remember not to mention that to Gabriel.

“So, you and Mayor Marsha,” she said as she struggled to keep up with him. “That must have been interesting.”

“She wanted to talk to me about the new hospital in town.”

“New hospital? Oh, right. The one they’re building. I have a friend, Montana. She’s married to Simon Bradley. He’s a—”

“Famous plastic surgeon who specializes in people who have been burned. I was told. The mayor did her best on selling me the job.”

“Were you interested?”

“No.”

Disappointment weighed heavily in her belly. She wanted to say that Fool’s Gold was a great town and the people were really friendly and that if he stayed they could... What? Fall in love? Gabriel didn’t want that. He didn’t want a wife and a family. He believed the risk wasn’t worth the reward. If he stayed she would want to spend time with him and doing that would most likely lead to getting her heart broken. Better for them both that he disappear while she was still in emotional control.

“You’re going back into the army?” she asked.

“I haven’t decided.” He looked up as it began to snow again. “According to my dad, I don’t get to leave. I owe them until I’ve done my twenty.”

“He doesn’t want you to choose?”

“Sure. As long as I choose what he wants me to.” He pointed straight ahead. “Trees,” he said.

She wasn’t sure if he was excited about the find or simply wanted to get her to change the subject. Regardless, she kept moving her legs through the thick snow, and watching for the perfect tree.

Chapter 9

Noelle shook her head.

Gabriel wanted to complain that this was the fifth tree she’d rejected, but he couldn’t blame her. Trees that grew in nature had a lot more flaws than groomed trees grown specifically for the holidays. One had an entire side missing, while another’s branches were oddly twisted. She would have done better picking one from the lot. Not that he was about to say that. She was getting more dejected by the minute.

Even though she was wearing a thick coat and a scarf, he could see her shoulders were slumped. Her hat had lost its jaunty angle and now simply hung down by her ears. He wanted to tell her that they would find what she was looking for, but he wasn’t sure it was out there. The perfect Christmas tree had been elusive this year.

Snow fell harder as they waded through the heavy drifts. They’d both worn heavy boots, but were getting soaked from boot tops to knees. The temperature was dropping.

“Noelle,” he began, not wanting to disappoint her, but unwilling to risk their safety. “We need to go back.”

She nodded without speaking.

“Hey,” he said, reaching for her. “You don’t have to—”

The rest of his sentence was swallowed by a rumbling sound as the trees above them suddenly lost all their snow. Huge clumps fell on top of them without warning, nearly burying them. Noelle screamed, then slid to the ground where she disappeared completely. He managed to stay standing, but found himself in waist-high banks.

“Noelle!”

He dove into the snow, reaching for her with both hands. She’d landed on her butt but had already pushed up her arms and was digging her way out. As he dragged her up, she pushed against the ground and managed to stand.

“You okay?” he asked as he ripped off his gloves, then brushed snow from her face. “Are you hurt?”

She stared at him, wide-eyed. “I was attacked by snow.”

“Or trees. Either way, I’m thinking nature isn’t your friend.”

“What happened?”

As she spoke, he checked her eyes and then urged her to take a couple of steps. Her balance was steady and she didn’t seem to be in pain.

“The snow got too heavy for the trees and it fell. It happens. At least it wasn’t an avalanche.”

She shivered. “I got snow down my back and in my boots.” She drew in a breath. “Okay, I’m done. There’s no perfect tree. I’m not going to win the window competition. We’ll just go with what we have.”

He drew her against him and kissed her cheek. “We’ll find you a nice domestic tree back in town.”

She nodded. “Okay. Sure.”

He didn’t like the resignation in her voice. His Noelle was exuberant and excited. She wanted to win the best Fool’s Gold window, or whatever the hell the contest was called.

“What happened to showing up with joy?”

“I’m too cold and I was attacked. My joy is temporarily beaten.”

“Let’s get you back to the truck,” he said, putting his arm around her waist and helping her wade through the drifts. The ax was heavy in his free hand. “You’ll feel better when you’re warm.”

She nodded, but didn’t speak. He felt her shivering. The cold seemed more intense and the snow fell harder. They used their own trail to make the going a little easier but eventually it filled in completely.

It was only when they were within sight of the house that Gabriel realized his mistake. It was
snowing.
They weren’t in town or even right off a highway. They were a quarter mile from a regular road that was three miles from a well-plowed highway. The little he could see of the truck wasn’t good. Snow came up past the bumper and it was getting dark.

Noelle looked up and saw the truck. “That’s a lot of snow.”

“Yes, it is.”

“Are we going to be able to drive out of here?”

“I don’t know. We might be stuck until the storm passes.”

She shuddered. He studied her in the fading light and saw that she was pale and shaking. He ripped off her gloves and touched her fingers. They were wet and freezing.

There was no guarantee he could get them out tonight. From what he could remember from the forecast, it was supposed to snow until at least midnight. He looked at the small cabin. There was a chimney and the little he could see was well-maintained.

“Let’s go inside,” he said. “We’ll get you warm and settle in for the night. I’ll see if I can dig us out in the morning.”

He waited for her to make a joke, but there was only the sound of her teeth chattering.

He helped her toward the cabin. They found steps and climbed up them onto the porch. He thought he might have to go looking for a key, but the door opened easily.

Inside was much warmer than outside, but incredibly dark. Gabriel reached for a switch on the wall and was surprised when lights came on.

“They still have electricity,” he said, wondering how long until it went out. “I’ll get you settled and warm, then go find some firewood.”

“You think we’re going to lose power?” Noelle asked through her chattering teeth.

“If it keeps snowing.”

He found the controls for the furnace and turned the thermostat up from forty-five to seventy. A quick tour of the cabin told him it was small—maybe six hundred square feet of open concept. A double bed was at one end, the kitchen at the other, with a living area in the middle. The only closed-off room was a small, three-quarter bath. He checked and there was still running water, although it wasn’t especially warm.

He led Noelle to the sofa and peeled off her jacket. It was soaked all the way through. She must have gotten snow inside when she’d fallen and then it had melted. Her shirt was damp, as were her jeans. She was shaking.

He had her sit, then quickly removed her boots. Her socks were soaked and her feet frozen. He got up and walked to the bed, where he stripped off the blankets. There was a cedar chest at the foot of the bed with more blankets inside. He grabbed all of them and returned to the sofa.

“Stand up,” he said, helping her to her feet. “We have to get you out of your clothes.”

He waited for a funny retort, but she only nodded. She was shaking too hard to undo her jeans, so he reached for the button at the waistband, then lowered the zipper.

The cold, wet fabric clung to her. He eased it down, ignoring her smooth skin and long legs. She stepped out of the jeans, then pulled off her sweater. The long-sleeved T-shirt came next and she was standing in front of him in bikini panties and a bra.

She was long and lean, with small breasts and narrow hips. Her pale skin was puckered with goose bumps, and she shivered and trembled. As much as he wanted to take a moment and enjoy the view, this wasn’t the time. He quickly wrapped her in the blankets and began to rub his hands up and down her arms and legs.

As he moved over her, he reminded himself that he was a doctor. His actions were purely professional and enjoying them was wrong on multiple levels.

He worked on her until she stopped trembling so hard. “Curl up on the sofa,” he told her. “I’ll get us settled.”

She nodded, still unable to speak.

He checked the vents. Warm air drifted out, but there wasn’t a lot of force behind it. No doubt the unit was small and old. It would take a couple of hours to get the cabin up to temperature. He draped her damp clothes over chairs he placed near the vents. The shirt and sweater weren’t as wet as her jeans, but eventually everything would dry.

He opened the refrigerator and didn’t find any food, but the cupboards were full of canned and packaged goods. He looked in the freezer and was surprised to find it full of casseroles, each labeled and dated. Most of them had been made within the past couple of months. The mayor hadn’t been kidding when she told Noelle it was kept stocked.

He pulled out a couple of casseroles and took the lids off so they could start to thaw. There was a small microwave on the counter, but that would only last as long as they had electricity. He was impressed it was still going, but had a bad feeling about it lasting much longer.

He checked drawers and under the sink. In a small alcove by the front door he found lanterns, both gas and electric. He set the latter to charging, then found two more by the bed and plugged them in.

The stove was wood, which was both good and bad. They could always cook, assuming either of them figured out how to use a woodstove. The closest he’d ever come had been roasting marshmallows on a camp-out. He glanced at Noelle, who sat huddled in her blankets, her eyes closed. She didn’t strike him as much of an outdoor girl.

There was more color in her face and she was shivering less. She opened her eyes and looked at him.

“How are you feeling?” he asked.

“Foolish. I’m sorry we’re stuck out here. I guess I cared too much about the window contest.”

“You’re not giving up,” he told her.

“We’re stuck in a snow storm. It’s Sunday. Even if we get out tomorrow, that doesn’t give us much time. And if we’re here until Tuesday, there’s no way I can get anything done.”

“I thought you were the one who had faith. Aren’t we supposed to be having this adventure with joy in our hearts?”

“I’ll find my joy when I’m a little less cold.”

He walked over to the sofa and sat next to her. He pulled her close and ran his hands up and down her arms.

“Don’t give up. You’re the one who believes.” He kissed the top of her head.

The blankets smelled of cedar, while her hair had a floral scent. Probably from her shampoo. Even through the layers of blanket, he could feel the outline of her body. While he couldn’t see anything, he happened to know she was wearing very little. A fact that had a predictable effect on his blood flow.

She raised her head and looked at him. “I’m sorry I got you trapped in a cabin,” she said. “I know this isn’t your idea of fun.”

“A romantic cabin in the woods, where I’m alone with a beautiful woman? Yeah, you’re right. This sucks.”

She gave him a smile. “I appreciate the effort. You’re being really sweet. I should have thought this through. I should have—”

He didn’t know what she was going to say and he wasn’t sure he cared. What he didn’t like was her beating herself up over something that wasn’t important. He only knew one sure way to quiet her, so he lowered his head and pressed his mouth against hers.

Her lips were as soft as he remembered. Warm, which was good, considering how cold she’d been. She didn’t hesitate, didn’t pull back. As he leaned in, she parted her lips for him. At the same time she wrapped her arms around his neck and sighed.

He moved his tongue inside her mouth and was met by hers. Each sweet stroke was like throwing gasoline on an already roaring fire.

With her arms around him, there was nothing holding up the blankets, which meant they fell and settled around her waist. The siren call of bare skin was too great, he thought. He couldn’t resist knowing what it felt like to move his hands up and down her back.

He danced his fingers along her spine and over her bra strap. He lightly traced her shoulders, then slipped down her sides.

She tilted her head and shifted her torso in what could only be called an invitation. It would take a much more morally strong man than himself to resist. He eased his hand from her side to her rib cage, then up to her breast. He cupped the curve, feeling the silky softness of her bra and tight bud that was her nipple.

As he ran his thumb back and forth across the sensitive tip, Noelle pulled back. Her blue eyes were darker, her mouth parted and swollen from their kisses. She reached for his other hand and brought it to her breast, then held his palms against her.

He’d been with women before—lots of women. He’d been seduced and done the seducing. But this was different. He didn’t know if it was the damn cabin or that he was back in the civilian world or something about Noelle. He wanted her with a heat that stole his will. At the same time, he wasn’t going to push, wasn’t going to take. Wasn’t going to hurt her in any way. He’d seen her happy and he’d seen her broken and he never wanted her to be in pieces again.

He’d told her he wasn’t staying, that while he believed in love, he wanted no part of it. If she was willing to accept that, then the choice had to be hers. And gratitude for what she probably saw as saving her life wasn’t the same as making an informed decision.

Reluctantly, painfully, he drew back. He allowed himself a brief image of her straddling him, letting him fill her as she rode him, his fingers between her legs, rubbing her until they were both lost to the moment. Then he drew the blankets back up around her shoulders and forced himself to look away.

* * *

“Still the gentleman?” Noelle asked lightly, her body tingling from a combination of warming and Gabriel’s touch.

“Did you bring condoms?”

She opened her mouth then closed it. “No,” she said. She hadn’t even brought her purse.

“Me, either.”

So stopping made sense, even if it wasn’t what she wanted. Being in Gabriel’s arms had made her feel strong and powerful. She’d liked the way he touched her and how she’d responded. But...and there was always a but...she wasn’t sure she was ready to hand over her body when she knew the circumstances were temporary. One thing she’d learned while she was healing was that she didn’t want regrets. She’d assumed most of them would be about what she hadn’t done, but some could go the other way.