Christmas Catastrophe: BBW Holiday Bear Shifter Romance (Christmas Bear Brothers Book 2) (4 page)

His words sent a shiver down her spine. He was right of course; there would only ever be one man for her now. And she would be the only woman for him. It seemed like a huge responsibility. What if she didn’t live up to all the other women he had slept with. What if he was disappointed with her? She wasn’t exactly the best housekeeper in the world. Sometimes she wondered if she was good at anything.

“Hey. You OK?” he asked breaking through her thoughts.

“Yes. Just feeling a bit odd. Drained, as if I’ve run a marathon, or something. Not that I know what that would be like. A little on the curvy side for long distance,” she said, indicating her voluptuous body.

He smiled, warming her with the look of pure lust that flashed across his face. “Oh, I have been noticing your curves from the very first moment we met.”

Her face flushed red with embarrassment. He was probably expecting her to be experienced in the bedroom, but she wasn’t. Not at all. It wasn’t as if she had been saving herself for her mate,
for him
, it had just never felt right. All the dates she had been on, when she was younger, never made her feel as though she wanted to be close or intimate with another person. Dating was tough when you knew the other person wasn’t
the one
. She had been left feeling as if she was leading them on. So dating had stopped before someone got hurt.

Her brother, Logan, had teased her about it incessantly, but when he was lucky enough to meet his mate a few years ago, he admitted that nothing could have prepared him for the depth of feeling and emotion he felt for Cindy, his mate and Robbie’s mom.

“I need to go and see Cindy,” she said, her mind trying to grab hold of her old life and cling on to all the things she had to do. Things she needed to get resolved before they went for a run, otherwise she would never be able to relax and truly enjoy herself. And she wanted to. After all the time she had spent trying to keep everything together, she needed time for herself, time with her mate, or she would go insane.

“I understand. Do you want me to come with you?” he asked.

“No. I think it would be better if I talked to her alone. Do you mind?” she asked.

“Of course not,” he said. “We’re mated, not joined at the hip.”

“Thanks.” She shivered, the night was settling in and everyone else had gone home, or to the bar to discuss the day’s events, no doubt. “Look, why don’t I show you the bar where you can get a drink and wait for me.”

“No.” His words were abrupt. “I’ll wait outside of wherever it is you need to go.”

“It’s freezing outside. Really, you would be happier in the bar.”

“I don’t want to be around other people. I want to be close to you. Even if there is a door between us.”

She liked the idea of him not wanting to be too far away from her. However, it made the thought of her brother spending Christmas away from his family almost too much. But as they walked to his house, the snow fell heavily, blanketing the ground and she knew there was little chance of him getting a flight home.

“So has your brother been gone long?” Damon asked.

“A month. He struggled for money, and with Christmas coming, he wanted to be able to earn enough for gifts, and food. We don’t have a lot here,” she said. “It’s because we are open about who we are … what we are.”

“You mean the other side of you—you’re a cougar, right?” he asked.

“Yes. Most of us are. We don’t hide it, but it means we don’t have outsiders visit. No tourists, which is where most towns around here get their income from. The mountain is a great draw, you know.”

“That’s tough. I’m sorry.” He walked by the side of her, his body close, and she longed to reach out and touch him, to feel the strong connection between them, but she had to see Cindy first, see if there was anything she could do to help. Although she knew the only thing that would make a difference was if the snow cleared and flights resumed.

“Right. Here it is,” she said, standing outside her brother’s small house. It didn’t look much from the outside, but it was clean, comfortable, and full of love. She only hoped one day she would have a home like it.

Her throat constricted in panic. She hadn’t allowed herself to think about how her life would change from now on. She was going to be living with Damon before long. Now they had found each other, they would be expected to move in together, get married, and have kids fast.

She didn’t know if she was ready.

“I’ll be quick,” she said, and knocked quietly on the door, before going in. “Cindy.”

“Zara! Thanks for coming over. Your dad told me what Robbie did. I am so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” Zara said. “And it’s not as if Robbie did anything bad. He just wants Logan home for Christmas.”

“He isn’t the only one,” Cindy said, her voice choked with emotion. “I want him here so badly I can’t breathe.”

“Oh, Cindy, if there was any way I could help, you know I would,” Zara said, hugging her sister-in-law. “I hope my dad wasn’t too hard on you.”

“No. Well, not really. You know how he is, and I think he realises this is tough. After all, he knows what it’s like to have a mate. Being away from Logan is the hardest thing I have ever done, and I’ve clung to the thought of him being back for Christmas. You know I didn’t want him to go, but he thought he was letting us down.

“He loves you all so much,” Zara said, thinking of Damon and wondering whether she would ever have such deep feelings for him.

“One day you’ll experience the same thing, Zara. You have no idea how much I wish that for you.”

“I hope you’re right.” Zara took a deep breath and then asked the question which was burning a hole in her brain. “Did you feel that way about Logan when you first saw him?”

“You mean, when we first met?” Cindy asked, frowning and looking closely at Zara. “Oh honey, have you found the man for you?”

“One of the firemen. He’s waiting for me outside.”

“Then go. Don’t hang around here with me. Go and get to know him.”

“But what if I don’t like him? Or he doesn’t like me.”

“You will learn to love each other, that’s how this thing works. Now go.”

“But what about you and Robbie?”

“We will survive. And you never know, since there has been one Christmas miracle, there might be another. The skies might clear and Logan might get home for Christmas.”

“I hope so, Cindy, it’s hard to be happy when you are so miserable.”

“You know what? Just knowing you have found the right man makes it all a little bit more tolerable.”

“Well, Robbie did wish on that star, you know.”

“Yes. Let’s hope there is some truth in that star being lucky. We sure could do with some. Now go.”

With that, she hugged Zara and pushed her out of the door.

“So you are the lucky man,” Cindy said to Damon, catching him off guard. “A big hunk of bear too. Now, I expect you to look after Zara; you have a special woman there.”

“I intend to,” Damon said, and Zara found herself blushing furiously as he looked at her with eyes that made her panties wet and her heart beat so rapidly she thought it would explode.

Damon could feel the heat of Zara’s body as she stood next to him. Her sister-in-law was smiling at the two of them, looking happy, despite the sadness in her eyes. Now he had found his mate he realised how tough it must for mates to be apart. He never wanted to be parted from Zara ever again.

Totally impractical, he knew, but that didn’t stop him wanting to spend every minute of every day for the rest of eternity with her.

“This is Cindy, by the way, Damon,” Zara said, finding her voice. She still looked embarrassed about being here, caught between him and the knowing looks of her Cindy. It made him wonder how many boyfriends Zara had had. Was it so unusual for her to be here with a man, or was it just that he was her mate?

“It’s nice to meet you, Cindy. I hope to get to know Zara’s family. I haven’t been up to Cougar Ridge often. But I’m hoping to spend lots more time here now,” Damon said, wanting to create a good impression. He certainly felt as if this was a first date and he was being vetted to see if he was suitable.

“I hope so too. Maybe when Logan gets back, you can come over for dinner?” Cindy asked and the sadness in her eyes crept into her voice.

“I would like that. I hope by some miracle he gets back to you for Christmas.”

“I think it will take more than Robbie’s wish on the star to make that happen. Flights have been grounded for hours. Even if they started to take off now, Logan’s flight will not get here on time.” She sniffed loudly, holding her tears in. “I can’t bear to think of him there at the airport all alone. Not at Christmas.”

“He’ll make it,” Zara said adamantly.

“I know we all want him to. But I can’t see how that is ever going to happen. He said he can’t even find a car to hire. Not for the money we can afford, all the rental places have been inundated.” She smiled at Zara. “Anyway, enough of this. You go have fun.”

“I don’t know if I can when you and Robbie are so miserable,” Zara said.

“Well, even if I can’t persuade you to have fun, I can at least take your mind off things,” Damon said, wanting to take her somewhere so they could be alone and get to know each other. And no, he didn’t mean just sex. He wanted them to talk, to tell each other their life stories.

OK. Maybe sex wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

He immediately regretted thinking those thoughts. His cock hardened, and he felt a strong desire to take hold of Zara, throw her over his shoulder, and take off up the snowy mountain cavemen-style.

“Come on. We were going to go for a run.” He waved to Cindy, backing away as he said, “Nice to meet you.”

Zara hesitated, but Cindy shooed her away. “Go and have some fun, you deserve it.”

“Keep your chin up,” Zara said to Cindy, hugging her tightly, and then she turned away from Cindy and followed him through the snow, heading across the street.

“Where do you go? You know, when you want to run?” Damon asked, not knowing the town layout too well.

“Out towards the back of town, there is some woodland. We can change there. Although we can change anywhere, really; everyone in town knows what we are.” But she was content to walk with him.

“That seems so strange to me. In Bear Bluff, we have to be careful. I like the idea of being free to be who you are.”

“Yes. If only it didn’t mean we end up with no tourists to help pay wages.”

“Are things really that tight here?” he asked.

“Yes. My brother got laid off from work a couple of months ago because his boss lost his delivery truck in an accident. With no way to deliver their goods, the firm collapsed and there was no other work for Logan.”

“And that’s why he is missing Christmas.”

“Yes,” she sighed, and then turned to him. “Let’s not think about that for now. I want to run, feel the snow on my fur and the cold searing my lungs.”

“Then let’s go.” With that, he allowed his bear to come to him and before they had set foot out of town, he was lumbering along on all four paws, with a sexy cougar by his side.

He was huge, making her feel small and vulnerable, in a good way. Zara was used to being the one to fight for what she wanted. She was as capable as any man, and could hold her own if it came to a fight with teeth and claws. Most men saw her as an equal, and with her fuller, curvier figure, feminine was not a thing Zara had ever felt, until now.

His big, thick legs powered him through the deepening snow, and she was forced to follow in her footsteps part of the way up the lower slopes where the deep, powdery snow was thickest. She didn’t mind: it meant she could watch him, and collect her thoughts.

Seeing Cindy so broken-hearted had made her yearn for the same kind of love and devotion that mates were supposed to have. Deep inside, she allowed herself to feel excited about this new stage of her life; she wanted to open herself up to all the joys it could bring. But what of the heartache?

What of the times when they would be apart, and the image of Cindy, and Robbie, came back to her.

But isn’t it better to have that love, and feel that depth of passion, then to live a half a life with no mate?

Her cougar talked sense, as usual, and as the snow cleared and the going got easier, she let go of all her doubts and fears and lunged forward, overtaking Damon and heading up the mountain slopes, with him behind her.

She ran and ran, not so fast that she lost him, but fast enough that the thrill of the open air and the nearness of her mate made her heart sing. She was alive, and she had a mate. She wanted to shout it to the world, to tell everyone, every man, every beast, that she had the best Christmas gift in the world.

Up, higher and higher, she climbed. The snow stopped falling and the stars came out above their heads, and still she climbed.

Behind her, she could hear his big paws, crump, crump in the new snow. She turned and watched him. It was time they stopped, time she stopped hiding in her cougar’s body and talked to him.

Zara knew just where to go. Climbing higher, she headed for a waterfall that cascaded down the side of the mountain. With this cold weather, she suspected it would be frozen, and they would be able to head into the small cave behind it. There they could sit and talk, with no pressure from anyone else in the world.

No sound reached her feline ears as they neared the waterfall, and as she suspected, it was frozen. Only the occasional drip of water splashing down onto the frozen pond below broke the muffled silence. The ground was carpeted by a foot or more of snow, the trees above them covered in a blanket of white, which covered their naked branches, making them bow down.

Leaping up onto a big boulder, she threaded her way through a small gap and into a large opening behind the frozen curtain of water. The moonlight above shone down on it, giving the curtain of ice an eerie appearance. In the glowing light, she changed back into her human form, the cold air hitting her, making her gasp in shock.

“I never expected it to be this cold,” she said, as he came to sit beside her. She hugged herself, rubbing her arms, trying to get some heat into her cold body. Normally she kept herself warm, no matter what the temperature. However, tonight she couldn’t help her teeth chattering in the freezing air.