âWhy don't you sit down?' Renatus suggested finally, but apparently it was the wrong thing to say.
â
Sit down
?' Emmanuelle repeated furiously. âI don't
think
so. I'm just
fine
. Why don't
you
start by telling me what you know? If it's what I think it is, if it's about P-Peter, and you think I'm too delicate to âear it, then you're wrong.' Her voice broke at the name, contradicting her words. âIf you think I'm too weak-'
âI don't think you're weak,' Renatus interrupted her. He was still sitting at his desk, gazing up at her with intense violet eyes. âWe both know that you're a very powerful and gifted sorceress.'
âSo,' she said, calming down a little, âtell me what you know. Where âave Lord Gawain, Glen, Qasim and Elijah gone tonight?'
Renatus held her furious gaze for a few seconds, but eventually had to back down and look away.
âEmmanuelle, please take a seat,' he said softly. âI'll have Fionnuala bring you a drink of something-'
â
No
,' Emmanuelle shouted. I jumped in shock and moved away, so I was standing near the darkened window. What had I dreamt myself into? Tears of frustration were glistening in the French sorceress's eyes now. âI will
not
be treated as a child, and not by you. You
bastard
! You know!
Tell me
! âow dare you âide this from me? You told me scrying doesn't develop this late in life â you told me it was a dream. You let me think myself an idiot!'
Renatus finally stood up so that he was facing her, looking down at her slightly. She was a tall woman, but he was taller.
âI'm trying to
protect
you,' he argued.
âI don't need you to protect me,' Emmanuelle said furiously, but quickly softened, her sadness curtaining the anger. She struggled to control herself and, in a tight monotone, she said, â
S'il vous plait
; pleaseâ¦tell me â is it true, what I think? What I saw?'
Slowly, Renatus nodded. Emmanuelle seemed to crumple. The anger and tension left her, and suddenly she wasn't so tall. She took a step back.
âTell me everything,' she murmured hollowly. Renatus rounded his desk and leant against its opposite side.
âTell me how you found out,' he countered gently. Her return look was cold.
âYou first,' she said firmly.
âIt happened a little while ago,' he said delicately, watching her closely for signs of a breakdown or explosion. âI'm not sure when, exactly. I've known for about a week. It was quick,' he added.
Tears had begun to stream down Emmanuelle's face.
âHow?' she asked brokenly, pronouncing every phoneme in the word.
âLisandro.'
I walked over and sat down on one of the stiff-looking armchairs in front of the desk. It was comfier than it looked. Still, neither councillor noticed me. What had Lisandro done? I didn't know what his capabilities were. This Peter person, whoever he was, seemed to have died, and according to Renatus, Lisandro was somehow involved.
âBut
how
?' Emmanuelle insisted, although she was shaking by now.
âQuickly,' Renatus said again. When she looked up and opened her mouth to press him for details, he said, âI'd rather not discuss the rest. What's important is that you remember him as he was to you.'
Emmanuelle was silent for several moments, trying to suppress sobs.
âIt was a while ago,' she whispered after a wait. âThe night the students came âere. There was a note in my garden, I found it today. It was dated March the first. Peter's handwriting. It just said, “Forgive me, love”. Why would âe call me that? âe never said it before. Did âeâ¦?'
âDid he mean it?' Renatus finished for her in a quiet voice. Emmanuelle nodded, crying openly now. âWe believe so. Don't you?'
Again, she nodded. She managed to choke out something unintelligible, and had to take several deep breaths before she could say it properly.
ââe never told me,' she whispered. âWhy wouldn't âe just tell me? Things might be different.
Peter
â¦'
âI'm sure he had his reasons. Maybe he thought he had more time.'
âI always thought âe would come back. I
hoped
.' Emmanuelle stressed the word enough to make the h sound. She covered her face with her hands.
âWe all did,' Renatus reminded her softly. She slowly dropped her hands and met his eyes.
Suddenly, Emmanuelle stepped forward and threw herself into Renatus's arms, wrapping her arms around his neck and back. She pressed her mouth against his and kissed him fiercely.
Shocked again, I jumped to my feet.
This
was unexpected. Emmanuelle, who had seemed to know so little about the headmaster when Sterling had badgered her, who had seemed even resentful of his power and magical abilities, who had spoken to him so coolly the other morning, was involved with Renatus?
Emmanuelle's manicured fingers slid through her colleague's soft black hair as she kissed him deeply. Renatus leaned backwards, lightly knocking the closest pile of papers. A few sheets drifted to the floor. Emmanuelle pressed herself close and held him tight, as though concerned that he, too, might disappear from her life.
My cheeks burned with embarrassment. I wished
I
could disappear. I was trapped in an office, watching my two most beautiful teachers make out. I considered running to the door and slamming my fists against the heavy oak until it opened, but then thankfully, I was given a reprieve.
Renatus's hands tightened around Emmanuelle's upper arms and he pulled her away from him.
âEmmanuelle,' he said. âStop.'
It was a simple command, but without much force. Emmanuelle shook her head childishly and shook him off.
âNo,' she said, pulling him close again for a second kiss. Again, it wasn't long before Renatus ended it, but while it lasted, it was intense. Emmanuelle kissed him with such force that I would not have been surprised if either of their lips were bruised. I'd never kissed anyone like that so I didn't know. She moved her hands to his cheeks and held his face tight.
âEmmanuelle,' Renatus said again, taking her shoulders firmly and holding her away. âStop. We both know it isn't me that you want.'
My supervisor stared at him with watery eyes, her skin flushed, her lips red. Then she dissolved into tears, dropping her hands to his shoulders and collapsing against him. Renatus ran a hand up and down her spine reassuringly for a few moments, then led her to one of the deceptively plush armchairs. He sat her down, and dragged the nearest one a little closer for himself. He conjured a tissue from thin air and handed it to her as though nothing had just happened between them.
â
Je suis désolée
, I'm so sorry,' Emmanuelle sobbed as Renatus sat down opposite her. â
Je ne l'ai pas fait exprès
. I didn't mean toâ¦I don't knowâ¦I justâ¦'
Renatus rested a hand on her knee. It was a supportive gesture, meant to convey understanding and sympathy. Soon, Emmanuelle calmed down. She hiccoughed and excused herself for it.
âDid you see it? The end, I mean,' Emmanuelle asked finally. Renatus nodded. âI only saw âim for an instant, underwater â âe closed âis eyes and then I woke up. Did âe suffer?'
âHis last words were, “I never told her I love her”. Peter's main concern at his death was that he'd lost his chance with you. I think the root of his deepest suffering was that you might hate him for what he'd done.'
Fresh tears ran over the French sorceress's cheeks, but she smiled. Renatus hadn't answered her question about Peter's suffering in quite the way I'm sure she'd expected, but it seemed to be the right thing for her to hear.
âI don't
hate
âim. I âope âe knew âow much âe meant to me, too,' she murmured.
âYou'll have your chance to tell him, probably tomorrow,' Renatus told her. âLord Gawain took the others tonight to retrieve the body. I imagine there will be a funeral service here tomorrow morning.'
âWhat will âappen to âim?' Emmanuelle asked, and Renatus hesitated. His intense eyes flickered towards the window, passing right over me without seeing.
âDoes his family have a place of burial?'
âI don't think so. Nowhere in particular. The Chisholms are very scattered.' Emmanuelle sniffed delicately, and Renatus looked at his hands.
âIf you would like,' he said slowly, âPeter could be buried here. With my family. If you would like. It's entirely up to you â you knew him best.'
Even though I barely knew him, I could sense how reluctant Renatus was to give this â how much it cost him to even say it. His expression was conflicted. He wanted to give Emmanuelle this small consolation, yet something else was making him hesitate. Family pride? Emmanuelle smiled, and it seemed to light up the room, so genuine and hard-earned was the expression.
â
Merci beaucoup
, Renatus,' she said warmly. âThis offer means a lot to me. But if it is up to me, I think âe should be cremated, and âis ashes given to âis grandmother. She was the only family âe could count upon.'
Renatus visibly relaxed, and nodded smoothly.
âOther than you,' he said. âI'm sure she will appreciate the gesture.'
Emmanuelle nodded, and opened her mouth to say something, but hesitated. She stared at him in silence for a long, long moment.
âThis is a stupid question,' she whispered, âbut I ask anywayâ¦can I trust you?'
Renatus, too, hesitated.
âI hope you will learn to,' he answered eventually. Emmanuelle reached over and took his hand.
âAnd words spoken in this roomâ¦they are completely safe?'
âAbsolutely. No one else can hear you.'
I shifted uncomfortably. Um, sorry, but I'm standing here denying your truth.
âThenâ¦' Emmanuelle hesitated again, tightening her grip on his hand. âThere's something else. A list, with your name, in Lisandro's hand.'
âWhat?' Renatus tried to pull his hand away, but Emmanuelle held on.
âThere are other names, too. Some dead, some alive. Some very unexpected. Don't stress, I don't âave it with me anyway,' she said. âIt doesn't matter, not in light of this.'
She looked significantly at their joined hands, and something changed. I peered closely. Her thumb seemed to be changing colourâ¦No, a ring was appearing. A dull, wide, silver band with a big stone set in. A strong presence seemed to be growing in the room, too, and it was only after a bit of energetic searching that I realised with a shock that a strong welling of power was coming
from
the ring.
Renatus took a deep breath. Emmanuelle looked up at him.
âIt's mine now,' she said. âPeter left it with the note.' She held his gaze. âDo you want to take it from me? I won't stop you â we both know I would not win. You can âave it.'
Slowly, Renatus pulled his hand from hers.
âThere's a very good reason why the weapons are kept separate,' he said, mystifying me. âI won't take it from you. I won't accept it from you if you offer it. It's yours now.'
Emmanuelle stared at him for a long time, seemingly surprised but also apprehensive, as though waiting for him to change his mind. When he did not, she broke the silence with a choked, awkward laugh.
âI've never given you enough credit, âave I?'
A harsh, heavy knock sounded at the door, startling both Emmanuelle and myself. Renatus waved his hand briefly, and we all watched as the door opened again and Qasim entered. Renatus stood quickly, and Emmanuelle wiped her eyes. Qasim surveyed the scene before him, which apparently didn't include me, and glared at Renatus.
âWhat did you say to her?' he asked, his tone making his annoyance clear. âI thought we agreed to wait.'
âHe Renatus told me what I deserved to âear,' Emmanuelle said testily, standing also and glaring back at the Scrier. âWhat gave
you
the right to decide what information is shared with other councillors?'
âI don't know what
he
told you, but the four of us agreed not to share this with you until we had all of the information,' Qasim responded coldly. âThat is, Lord Gawain, Lady Miranda, Renatus and myself. I would have thought that the collective wisdom of the four of us would be sufficient.'
âWhere's Peter?' Emmanuelle said sharply, changing subjects. âIs âe
here
?'
âEmmanuelle,' Qasim said, staring at her hand, âis that-'
âYes, it is,' she snapped. âPeter passed it to me. Now, where is âe?'
âGlen and Elijah are bringing him now,' Qasim said. âThis changes things. When did you receive that?'
âI took possession of it today, but Peter left it for me over two weeks ago.'
âInteresting,' Qasim murmured. He turned his attention to Renatus. âLord Gawain is waiting for you in the ballroom. He would like to discuss funeral plans with you.'
âEmmanuelle has already made a decision on that,' Renatus said.
âWhere was âe?' Emmanuelle pressed, and I saw the two men glance at one another.
âOn a private beach,' Qasim said.
âAnd why tonight?' Emmanuelle added insistently. âWhy have you waited a week before retrieving him?'
Qasim's eyes narrowed at Renatus â apparently, the younger councillor had said way too much.
âOur visions were indistinct and dated,' the headmaster explained, ignoring the Scrier. âWe had no way of knowing where the event was taking place. One of Qasim's students had an accompanying vision yesterday that gave us some further information â a place name; the bird life; the season of the area.'
âOne of the students? Who?' Emmanuelle asked, looking between them. They gave her nothing further, but I felt my jaw drop.