Cheesecake and Teardrops (23 page)

“I bought you some sanitary pads, but your periods will probably be a lot lighter now that you've had the surgery,” Jena said.

“Thank goodness. I think my stomach has even shrunk.”

“I'm not surprised.” She looked at her daughter gently before continuing. “Honey, Dr. Walton had to remove a portion of both your ovaries to get all the fibroids. And . . .”

She sighed.

“And.”

Jena took a deep breath. “And he feels that you may never be able to conceive.”

“Oh my God. Oh my God,” she repeated. “There must be some mistake.”

“Honey, he's only a doctor. He's not God. My mother used to say that man's extremities are God's opportunities. Remember that, honey. I promise you. One day we'll have our Joy,” she said. Joy was the name Charisma had chosen for her firstborn daughter.

Charisma looked at Jena with big fat tears welling up in her eyes and racing down her chin. “Well, I guess there's no need to get back on the Pill.”

“It's okay to cry.” Jena went over to her daughter and held her in her arms. “Let it out, honey.”

Tony had been working undercover a lot lately in Manhattan, and he was careful to keep that part of his life separate from his personal life. He took serious measures to ensure that his cover would not be blown. Now that Tangie was in his life, he had to be even that much more cautious. So if he had to lie to her about his whereabouts, so be it. It was for her own good.

That morning Tony woke up feeling uneasy. In his gut he knew that something just wasn't right. He showered and shaved, made himself a bacon-and-eggs breakfast, and got dressed. Tony made certain the wire he wore was hidden securely under his black shirt before grabbing a pair of designer frames and a baseball cap and heading into the city. He carried a change of clothing in a duffel bag for after work. He was doing surveillance on the Estrada case. Jorge Estrada was a member of one of the biggest drug cartels operating on the East Coast. Tony was working as a bouncer in a midtown strip club Estrada frequented.

He got to the club before eleven, keeping his eyes and ears open. It was a slow day. Somewhere around 2:00
P.M.
, Estrada and his street urchins entered the club. Tony had orders to escort them to Dave's office in the back. Once inside the office, Estrada took out a big, fat Cuban cigar. He lit it and took several puffs before telling Tony to get lost.

“He stays,” Dave said. “He's cool.”

“Search him,” Estrada told two of his flunkies. Once satisfied, they all sat. No one said a word except Dave and Estrada.

“So when's the next shipment of coke due in?” Dave asked Estrada.

“Don't worry about it,” Estrada said.

“I want in. I have a contact at Homeland Security who'll whisk you in like you're the Queen of England.”

“We don't need your damn contact. We have our own.”

Estrada grinned.

“I know. As we speak he's singing like an American Idol. You're being set up. And with all the evidence the Feds now have against you, they'll put your ass away for a long time.”

“Bullshit.”

“Go ahead. Call your boys. You'll see.” Estrada picked up his cell phone and pressed speed dial. He spoke a few words in Spanish, his body tense as he hung up.

“Now,” Dave said before lighting up a Cuban and blowing out smoke for emphasis. “How much is my contact worth to you?”

 

Tony parked down the block from of Canyon's Club later that evening and waited for Tangie. He was picking her up since her car was in the shop. She was already ten minutes late, and he was getting fidgety. It had been a long day. Hopefully, the Feds had enough evidence on Estrada to nail him.

Tony decided to get out and stretch his legs, leaning on the passenger's side of his Benz for support. He had an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach all day. He gently wiped the sweat from his dome in one easy motion and reached for his cell phone to call Tangie just as she exited the building. Smiling, she spotted him instantly. He watched her walk the half block to his car. Just as she was about to give him a hug, two men in deep conversation accidentally bumped into her.

“I'm so sorry,” one of them apologized.

“Be careful,” he warned. “A woman as beautiful as you can get hurt.”

“I'm fine,” Tangie said.

“You certainly are,” the other agreed, winking at Tony.

Tony recognized them instantly. It was Estrada's flunkies. Tony rushed her into the car, closed the door, and got in next to her. He sped off without saying a word.

“Babe, you're sweating. What's wrong?” Tangie asked.

“Nothing, baby. Just tired is all.”

“You know I love it when your head glows. Why don't we go back to my place and really make it shine?” She laughed.

“How about a rain check? I'm exhausted.”

“I'll let you off the hook this time,” she said.

They drove the rest of the way in silence. Tangie sensed that Tony needed some space. Apparently, she was right. He didn't call her for several days.

 

Tony had a lot on his mind. He vividly remembered the conversation he'd had with Tangie's father and his promise to never compromise her safety. Now he was in a situation he never imagined he'd be in. As much as he wanted otherwise, it wasn't going to work. He'd have to let her go. Life was a bitch.

Tony picked up his phone and dialed her number. She wasn't home, so he left a message on her cell to call him. Tangie returned his call about nine o'clock that night.

“What's up, babe?” she asked him.

“I need to see you,” he said simply.

“Wow, sounds serious.” She laughed. “Is everything okay?”

Tony was silent.

“Babe, what's wrong? Tell me what's going on. You're beginning to worry me.”

“Are you early or late tomorrow?”

“Late. I'm not due in to work until eleven.”

“Why don't I come by for a little while. I just want to see you, baby.”

“Okay,” she said softly. “See you in a few.”

Tony took his own sweet time getting to Tangie's that night. Besides, it was a foggy night and visibility was poor. When he finally arrived at Tangie's, she was wearing the lime green silk teddy he'd bought her, making it difficult for him to stay focused. He took both of her hands in his, kissing them gently before sitting on the sofa next to her. They sat in silence for a moment.

Finally he spoke. “When I met you, I fell hard and I fell fast. The more time I spent with you, the more I wanted to be with you. I had no doubt in my mind that you were the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. None whatsoever. Lately, I've been having second thoughts. I don't think I'm ready for marriage. Have you seen
A Bronx Tale
with Robert De Niro?”

“No.” She shook her head slowly. “I haven't.”

“Well, the main character idolizes this mobster, and the mobster tells him that when it comes to women, you only get three great ones. Tangela, you're number two.” He tried to make light of the situation.

“So in other words, you want out.”

“I'm just not ready for a commitment, Tangela. I thought I was, but I'm not.”

“Just like that you're not ready.” Tears started to flow down her cheeks.

“Baby, it's not you. It's me.”

She began to cry. “Famous last words. I don't believe you. All of a sudden, out of the blue you're not ready?” She wiped her nose with the back of her hand. “Is there someone else?”

“Tangela, trust me. There's nobody else. I just can't marry you.”

Tony stood. “I have to get going, Tangela. I have an early morning tomorrow.” He held her one last time, and she nearly collapsed in his arms. Then he kissed her once on the forehead before leaving.

He hadn't even driven away before the first gut-wrenching sobs escaped from Tangie's throat. Somehow she couldn't believe that just like that her engagement was off. Was she having an out-of-body experience? She couldn't believe this was really happening to her. She was numb. What was she going to do? How was she going to face the world? She felt like her life was over. Tangie went through the motions of removing her makeup and brushing her teeth before getting into bed. Curled up in the fetal position, she cried on and off all night. Finally, somewhere around dawn, she dragged herself out of bed, put on her pj's, and climbed back into bed.

She slept until the phone woke her up somewhere around noon. It was her boss.

“Where the hell are you? You were supposed to be here an hour ago,” he said.

“I know. I'm having a family emergency.”

“And you couldn't call in?”

“I'm sorry,” she said. “It's just been crazy.”

“Will you be in later?”

“No, I'll probably need to use a few personal days.”

“Okay, Tangie. It just would have been nice if you had had the common courtesy to call. I'll see you later in the week, and let me know if we can do anything.”

“Thanks, Brooke,” she said before hanging up.

Tangie hadn't eaten in over eighteen hours, and yet the thought of food didn't appeal to her. She finally got up, took a shower, put on a fresh pair of pajamas, and brushed her hair back into a ponytail. Anything more than that was too much of an effort.

She went back to bed, gazing aimlessly out her bedroom window as a fresh batch of tears ran down her cheeks. The sun was shining and all around her were signs of spring, but she felt as though her life was over. She checked the clock radio on the nightstand. It was just after one o'clock.

Charisma was probably out to lunch. She decided to give her a call on her cell.

“Charisma?” Tangie began.

“What's wrong, Tangie?”

“It's over.”

“What's over?” Charisma asked.

“Tony called the wedding off.” Tangie started crying all over again.

“What happened?”

“He just said he's not ready.” She was in a daze.

“Did you have a fight?”

“No. He said he was having second thoughts, and then he brought up some Robert De Niro movie where the guy says you only get three great loves.”

“
A Bronx Tale
?”

“Yeah, can you believe it? I can't. I'm still in my pajamas. Can you and Heather come over after work?”

“Sure. We'll be over. Can we bring you anything?”

“No.”

“Have you eaten today?”

“No, I'm not hungry. Why can't I ever have who I want? I can't deal with this, Charisma.” She wiped her nose with her pajama sleeve.

“Of course you can. Everything's going to be all right. You'll see. I'll call Heather, and we'll be over later. Okay?”

“Okay. And Charisma, thanks.”

“Hey, that's what best friends are for. See you soon.”

Tangie grabbed the remote and turned on the TV. Daytime television was a trip. Practically every channel she flipped to showed a scantily-clad couple bed-hopping or in the throes of passion. It was all just another reminder of her loss.

She switched the TV off and got back under the covers. Tangie drifted off to sleep and was awakened by the sound of her doorbell. She got up instantly, thinking it was Tony. Then she remembered that he was no longer a part of her life.

It was Charisma and Heather. They both gave her a big hug, rubbing her back for comfort.

“We stopped by Pizza Hut and brought dinner,” Charisma said. “You have to eat something.”

They all headed into the kitchen. Tangie sat listlessly while Heather and Charisma got dishes and napkins for the table. They sat and poured soda.

Heather lifted her glass in a toast. “Behind every successful woman is?”

Tangie sighed heavily before answering. “I'm not in the mood.”

They all dug into the pizza, still hot from Five Towns. Tangie had to admit the stuffed crust pizza hit the spot, especially since it was her first meal of the day. She was almost ready for her second slice when Charisma said, “Tell us exactly what happened.”

Tangie tried to make sense of it the best she could. When she finished, Heather and Charisma were just as confused as she was.

Heather chose her words carefully. “Do you think there's another woman?”

“At this point I don't know what to think. Everything seemed fine a week and a half ago. And then all of a sudden things changed. I've gone over it a million times in my head. If he were cheating on me, you'd think my being with Blade would have made me an expert on spotting it. I don't know what to think anymore. I just don't know.”

“Well, men come and go, but the three of us are forever,” Charisma assured her.

 

Tangie took two more days off and then returned to work. She merely went through the motions, never realizing how hard it all was. Tangie was just trying to live. Simple as that. She didn't give a monkey's behind what her coworkers thought, but by the end of the week, she still hadn't told her parents that the wedding was off.

Ted and Della Winterhope cried alongside their daughter when they heard the news. Tangie knew her mother felt her pain as only another woman could. As Ted and Della left Tangie's that night, they speculated on what may have happened to cause the breakup. Ted recalled the man-to-man chat he'd had with his prospective son-in-law. Tony had declared his love for Tangie and promised that if they ever broke it would be his way of protecting her. He said as much to Tangie's mother.

“You think that's what happened?” Della asked him.

“More than likely. I mean, they hadn't been engaged a hot minute when he breaks it off. I think he was on the up-and-up. I really do. I don't think there was another woman.”

“Too bad
you
couldn't say that,” Della shot back. “Hey, I couldn't resist.”

Ted shook his head and continued. “As I was saying, I don't think he was unfaithful. I think he really does care about Tangie.”

“I'm just tired of my baby getting her heart broken over and over again,” Della sighed. “When will it end?”

 

 

Tony soon realized that it was easy to cut Tangela out of his life, but it was hard cutting her out of his heart. Like most men, he was determined to make the cut as quick as possible. He rid his home of all the little mementos that reminded him of her—photos, receipts for the lime roses he sent her on a regular basis, even her favorite cookies. Out they all went. He couldn't allow himself the luxury of living in the past, of hanging on. Sure, he spent many nights hanging out at local bars drowning his sorrows, but that was to be expected.

A month went by and just as Tony regained control of his emotions, Tangie called.

“Hi,” she said.

“What's going on?” He was caught off guard.

“I just needed to hear your voice.”

“How are you feeling?”