Chasing Rainbows (18 page)

The last time I'd visited, Devon had a set of drums sat up in the other bedroom and a carburetor had lain torn apart and scattered across the floor. "That's Jake's," she said, walking toward the closed door. "Let's look in his room."

"No!" I shrieked. "Are you crazy? He could come in and catch us."

"No, he won't," she insisted, smiling back at me and wiggling her eyebrows. "Come on, Addie. Live a little. It's your birthday." She already had the door open by the time I got up from the couch and walked around to join her. There was no stopping Kara once she got an idea in her head. "He's a neat freak," she declared in a shocked voice, and I stared around the small cramped space of his bedroom thinking she was nuts.

"No, he's not," I denied. He wasn't a neat freak; at least not by my standards.

A single black blind covered the narrow window in the room. His bed was unmade. The blankets and sheets twisted. An unwanted image popped into my mind and immediately, I stopped myself before I could even go there. His mattress and box springs sat on the floor along with the clothes he'd worn the night before. I could feel my face growing warm, and I hoped Kara didn't notice.

Jake wore boxers!

There were a couple of boxes that still needed to be unpacked, and they sat beside the makeshift bed. It seemed as if he'd been using them for a nightstand since there was some loose change, receipts, and a half empty bottle of forgotten beer. In the far corner, a guitar leaned against the wall. It looked like a Fender.

"Honey, I'm home!" Devon cried out, laughing.

I spun around in time to see him and Jake walk into the apartment.

Jakes gaze met mine then slid to his opened bedroom door, and he raised one eyebrow. A lazy smile slid over his features, and his eyes traveled over every single inch of my body. He paused his inspection at my face, which I knew was beet red.

"Addie, wanted to see your room, Jake," Kara said, and I gasped and sputtered at her outrageous lie, but nothing sensible came from my mouth.

Thank you, Kara. Now, he thinks I'm a nosey snoop.

Jake's grin widened as if he were pleased by that tiny little snippet of information. He was dirty with grease smeared on his jeans. His hands and his forearms were almost black; the color of soot. A dark smudge lined his cheek and made his cobalt blue eyes seem even bluer.

I stood there beside my best friend — the one I currently wanted to kill — with my mouth hanging wide open. Kara deserted me and walked toward Devon. She stood up on her tiptoes to place a kiss against his dirty cheek.

I was frozen in place as Jake walked toward me; his hips rolling with an easy gait, reminding me of lazy afternoons tanning beneath the warm summer sun. Even filthy, he was beautiful. "You snooping in my room?" he asked with a cocky smile that made my heart skip a beat. His expression was smug.

At his words, my mouth fell open.
Was he flirting with me?
Being this close to him and that expression on his face made my stomach flutter. I started to break out in a cold sweat. "Uh," I sputtered, feeling my face heat.

Get a hold of yourself, Addie. He's just another guy.

"Of course, not," I replied, and watched as his grin grew even wider as he studied my face.

"You sure about that?" he asked playfully, arching a dark eyebrow at me.

Crossing my arms over my chest, his eyes momentarily followed my movement then flicked back to my face. He was checking me out. "Yes," I replied my voice stiff as I tried to act offended. "Why would I snoop in your room? You're just being silly."

A wicked gleam entered his eyes and suddenly, I came to my senses and stepped aside so he could enter his room.
Duh, I'd been blocking his door.
His was so close. I only had to reach out and touch him, but I didn't.

"Addie," he said, and I glanced up meeting his eyes. The gravelly sound of his husky voice sent chills racing down my spine. "You're welcome to visit my room anytime, now that you're legal."

When he brushed past me, we almost touched, and I noticed then that Kara and Devon were standing there watching us, both of them wearing silly grins.

I sat on the edge of Devon's bed as Kara worked her magic on my eyes. Devon was taking a shower and somehow, Kara had convinced me to let her do my makeup. She was smiling and standing over me with a mascara wand in her hand. When she applied the eyeliner to my lower lid, I thought she was going to poke my eye out.

"It's perfect, Addie!" she exclaimed, and took a step back, looking at me.

"She sure is," Jake said from the doorway.

I looked up, startled. I hadn't even heard the door open. Yet, there he stood staring back at me. His hair was still damp from his recent shower. A fitted gray T-shirt displayed every hard ridge of his abdomen and chest. His faded jeans hugged his lean hips encasing his long legs and muscular thighs. He looked hot. Smoking hot, to be exact. Our eyes locked, and I grew short of breath. He'd caught me checking him out.

Kara leaned over. "He's got the hots for you," she whispered.

Then Jake stepped back. Devon strolled through the doorway and into the room wearing nothing but a towel and a smile. He wasn't embarrassed in the least as he walked over to his closet and began searching through it.

Don't mind me…
It was time to leave.

I slipped from the bed and started past Kara, heading for the door.

"Go get him, tiger," she whispered.

I rolled my eyes and pulled the bedroom door closed behind me to give them some privacy, which left me alone with Jake. He was now sitting at the tiny kitchen table watching me as he sipped on an ice cold beer.

"Happy birthday." He smiled and took another drink of his beer while keeping his eyes locked on mine the entire time. "Come join me," he urged and pushed out the chair closest to him.

I was so confused. I felt guilty because of Chance. He had never promised me anything, but I could still hear his hoarse voice whispering in my ear that I belonged to him. I didn't understand what had happened since then, but a rift had developed between us and had grown as wide as the Grand Canyon.

I should have let him come into the house the previous night. Then, just maybe, I wouldn't be standing here filled with indecision and faced with the sinful temptation known otherwise as Jake Riley, who was sitting there regarding me as if he were a dying man and I was his only salvation. He made me want him. I was a tramp. Probably the only eighteen-year-old virgin tramp within a thousand-mile radius of Crawley County.

He leaned back in his chair. My eyes were immediately drawn to the pull and play of his toned muscles when he stretched to open the door of the ancient refrigerator sitting behind him. He pulled out another beer and I sat down beside him at the table.

"It's alright, Addie. I'm a big boy," he said, as if somehow knowing my thoughts. He handed me an opened beer, and his long fingers grazed mine. I felt his touch all the way down to the tips of my toes. Up close, he was lethal.

The warm glint in his eyes and his charming smile put me at ease even though I sensed the danger surrounding him. As I was sitting there trying not to look at him, I needed to make sense of this attraction I felt. Life was so unfair. I had the urge to warn him that he shouldn't waste his time on me. I was messed up; broken inside, and didn't like life very well at the moment. Jake seemed like a good guy. He didn't need all the drama that went along with Avalanche Addie. I touched my tongue to my lips and took a sip of the beer. When I looked up, his eyes were locked on my lips. Between us, the air seemed to come alive and crackle with our chemistry. It was intense.

"I don't want to hurt you," I told him, my voice barely above a whisper. I was surprised I'd managed to get the words out. While I'd been thinking it, I hadn't meant to actually say it out loud.

He leaned forward and set down his beer, then reached across the table and covered my hand with his. The heat of his touch rendered me speechless. His thumb stroked the soft fragile skin in between my fingers and I noticed the tiny nicks and scars running along the ridges of his knuckles. It was a strong hand; a capable hand. One that belonged to a man who fixed broken things. A man, who made my heart slam painfully in my chest. A man that I was aware of even though I didn't want to be. He wasn't a boy, and I had no business messing with him.

He was way out of my league.

He made me want him even though I knew that I shouldn't. He couldn't fix me, even though I wished for just a second that maybe… he could. I had too many issues. No one wanted a girlfriend who was as fucked up as me. I had to fix myself. At least, I'd learned that much from my last counselor. It wasn't fair to Jake or me for that matter. I needed to stay away him until I figured out this mess that was going on inside my own head. I was no good for anyone the way that I was.

"I won't do this to you, Jake," I said, and forced myself to look him squarely in the eyes.

His gaze held mine without breaking; his face no longer smiling but serious and deadly calm. "I'm patient, Addie." He grazed my wrist with the pad of his thumb, where I knew he would feel my pulse fluttering like crazy beneath my skin. Just a touch from this man and I was wrecked. Behind us, a door opened and I tried to jerk my hand from his but he wouldn't let go.

"So," Kara said in a breathy voice walking to the table. I noticed the flush of her cheeks and knew instantly what she and Devon had been doing behind that closed door. She'd changed from the clothes she'd worn earlier and was now wearing a strapless stretchy black dress and a pair of black heels which made her shapely legs seem like they were a mile long. Devon's shaggy hair was slicked back making him look like a debonair gangster. He was dressed up too. If wearing a blue button-down shirt and a pair of new jeans could be called dressy. But it was for him.

Kara was smiling, and her eyes were now trained on our entwined hands lying on top of the kitchen table. "You two good?"

"We're good." Jake said, and let go of my hand and leaned back against his chair looking at Devon and Kara. "What's on the agenda tonight?"

Devon reached into his back pocket pulling out a thin sheet of square plastic. It looked like a card.

"I almost forgot," he said, smiling as he handed the piece of plastic to Kara.

"Happy Birthday!" she squealed as she slammed the plastic card down onto the table in front of me.

"No way!" I exclaimed, looking down at the fake license with my picture. Today, I was Liz Emmy, and she had finally turned twenty-one.

"Liz Emmy?" I asked, not too thrilled about the name and trying hard not to snicker. Kara giggled. She thought this was funny.

"They'll buy it. Don't worry. Devon is a freaking genius," she said, her voiced puffed with pride. Then she turned and smiled up at him. "We all got one. Well, except for Jake. He's legal." She smacked him on the arm as if scolding him for being the oldest one out of us all then smiled at Devon batting her eyelashes. "My baby will be too tomorrow.

"We're driving up to Hurley," Devon announced, and I watched as Jake arched his dark brows in approval.

"Shiver?" he asked and Devon nodded his head in reply, then he looked at me taking in my clothes. "You'll have to change."

"Come on," Kara squealed, tugging me from my chair. "I've got the perfect dress for you."

Devon immediately slid into my seat beside Jake and began drinking my beer. "We'll be back in five minutes," Kara cried, pulling me toward the bedroom.

"I've heard that one before," Devon teased, and he and Jake were both laughing as she dragged me into the room and shut the door.

Chapter fifteen

I
WAS SITTING IN THE PASSENGER SEAT
of Jake's Sonoma nervous as hell. I tugged at the bodice of the stretchy silver sequined dress that Kara had insisted I wear. I was almost naked. The hem was so high I looked down at my exposed thighs afraid to move. If I did Jake might see my scars. I'd worried about showing so much skin, but Kara insisted and for some insane reason, I'd listened to her, against my better judgment.

I'd offered to drive, so we could all ride together, but somehow I found myself sitting alone with Jake in his truck while Devon and Kara followed behind us.

Slow, soft music drifted through the speakers. Neither one of us had said a word since we'd left the apartment, and we were now past town driving on the highway heading toward Hurley.

"You're awfully quiet," Jake said, sparing me a quick glance before turning those hypnotic eyes of his back on the road.

"I feel like a hooker in this," I muttered, and he laughed, shaking his head in disagreement. To complete my whorish look, I wore Kara's knee high shiny black plastic boots which molded to my calves. She said they would be perfect with the dress. I thought she was perfectly crazy.

"You look amazing." He flexed his long fingers against the steering wheel. His other hand rested on his knee, and I'd caught myself a couple of times wanting to reach out and lay my hand over his. Occasionally, his fingers tapped against his thigh in tune with the music. He was obviously in a good mood.

"I knew your sister," he said, casually. He glanced over at me for only a few seconds before his eyes settled back onto the road. "Everyone liked Natalie. I'm sorry for what happened to her."

"Me too," I whispered, realizing that I hadn't thought about her all day. Guilt settled in like a familiar long lost friend, and selfishly, I wished that it would go away and never return. I grew quiet staring out the window, lost in my thoughts.

"Do you want to talk about Chance?" he asked.

I whipped my head around and stared at him in surprise and disbelief, almost laughing at his question.

"You mean you want me to talk to you about another guy?"

"Not really," he said with a trace of humor, his lips curved in a wide grin. "There's no way if you were mine I would let you spend your birthday without me."

I didn't know what to say, but he was right. I wasn't Chance's or he would be here with me right now instead of Jake. I would be sitting in his black Ford pickup instead of Jake's silver Sonoma.