Chasing Midnight (Dark of Night Book 2) (11 page)

Too many maybes wiggled in his head like leeches, draining his confidence. Shane hit the radio button, just looking for something to block out the silence that was eating away at him. In the dash, Isabel’s cell phone rang, the tune of “Black Magic Woman” drowning out the carpet commercial playing on the radio. Shane turned down the volume. In the passenger seat, Isabel stared at the phone like it was an alien being before finally picking it up and flipping it open.

“Hello?” she said hesitantly, as if she didn’t know the caller. Shane knew just from the ringtone that it was Isabel’s little sister, Heather. Thanks to his super vampire hearing, he was able to pick up both ends of the conversation.

“Hey Isabel. Mom asked me to call and let you know we are meeting at Jaxon Fabrics Friday at noon for our fitting.”

“Fitting?” Isabel asked, confused.

“For our uniforms? For that catering job the bakery got? Sound familiar?”

“Oh, right. Of course. I’ll be there. No problem.”

“Really? Huh. You’re taking this remarkably well.”

“It’s been a long couple of days,” Isabel said, letting exhaustion into her voice.

“Sorry to hear that. Well, since you’re being so agreeable, can you come over tomorrow and help me finish the setup of the shop? There’s still a ton to do, and I could use some help. Especially if I’m going to open on time.”

“Sure. I’ll meet you after lunch. I have a few things to work on tomorrow.”

“Okay, thanks. Hey, how did the séance go? You never called me after.”

Isabel shifted uncomfortably. “It was pretty uneventful. Not much to go on. But I’m going to look into it anyway, just to make Nana Elsie happy.”

“Well, if you need anything…”

“Yeah. I’ll speak to you later, alright?”

“Um, sure. Later, sis.”

Isabel closed the phone, tapping it on her chin as she looked off distractedly. “Everything alright, Isabel?”

She waved her hand and smiled. “Everything is fine. Just family stuff.”

“You have a lot on your plate right now. Is there anything I can help with?”

She looked at him, blinking like something just occurred to her. “Actually, yes. But not today. Today is my day.”

He snickered. “Well, alright then.”

i

The beach was as empty as Shane had ever seen it. Only a sparse handful of people here and there. No one was in the water. Not a surprise, on a day like that. It was probably only in the low 70s. The breeze had quickly grown into a sharp wind that lifted and blew sand across the ground while dark storm clouds gathered on the horizon. Even so, Isabel slipped off her tennis shoes and stepped onto the sand. For a moment, she just stood there. Then she glanced back over her shoulder at Shane, offering him a playful grin before she bolted straight for the surf. Shane followed her slowly. Isabel got about ankle deep in the water when she stopped, the wind whipping her hair free of its tie. She held her arms out and spun. A wave rolled in, crashing at her feet, spraying foam almost to her waist. She looked down, laughing.

i

As if the sound of her laughter was irresistible, in a blur of vampire speed, Shane rushed forward, grabbing her around the waist. The force of his momentum drove them both into the water. Isabel screamed playfully. She came up out of the water, wiping her wet hair back off her face. Reaching down, she scooped up two handfuls of water and launched them at Shane. He could have moved out of the way, of course, but he let her have the tiny victory. He licked the salt off his lips. She waded toward him, and in a fit of surprising strength, she pushed and he went down, but not before grabbing her, taking her down with him. They romped for a few minutes before Isabel crawled out of the water and flopped, shivering, onto the sand. Shane dropped to his knees beside her.

“I haven’t had this much fun in months,” he said, wringing the water from his shirt.

“A hundred years, at least,” Isabel agreed.

“We should do this again tomorrow.”

Isabel threw her head back and laughed. “Ready to shirk your responsibilities already?”

Shane sobered. “If it means being free to spend time with you, then yes.”

Isabel pulled her legs up, wrapping her arms around her knees. “That would be lovely, wouldn’t it? We could spend every day doing this, just enjoying our days. But alas…”

“Why not? We can come back tomorrow; the sun will be out then. It’ll be a little warmer. I’ll build a bonfire. We can roast marshmallows.”

“Maybe you should leave the fire making to me?” Isabel made a whoosh gesture with her hands.

“Oh, yeah. Huh. I forgot.”

“Forgot what? That you’re a vampire?”

Shane frowned, doodling in the sand to avoid looking her in the eye. “I forgot what it was like to feel human. To feel… alive.” He shook his head. She wouldn’t understand. How could she?

“I feel that way too. All the time. It’s as if I’m just drifting with the tide. Like I’m invisible.”

Shane looked up. Isabel’s brown eyes swam with unshed tears. It was amazing. He’d never seen her cry. Not once, not ever.

“I can see you,” he promised, putting a hand on her knee. “I will always be here for you.”

Isabel bent over, placing a chaste kiss on his hand where it rested. Then she looked up, holding his gaze. “I feel alive today too. I feel alive when I’m with you.”

Shane leaned forward, unsure but moving on pure instinct. To his surprise, Isabel leaned forward too, preparing to meet his kiss. A flash of light cracked through the sky, and a torrent of rain let loose from the clouds.

“Ah!” Isabel squealed and jumped up. Reaching down, she took Shane’s hand and pulled him to his feet. “Dance with me,” she commanded, spinning herself in a circle.

“Seriously? It’s raining and there’s no music.”

She draped an arm over his shoulder. “True, but I’m Cinderella, and today is my ball. At midnight, the magic ends.”

Shane pulled her tight against him, raking a hand through her loose, wet hair. “Why? Are you planning on turning into a pumpkin?”

Her face faltered. “A very grumpy pumpkin at that.”

“Then today, I’ll be prince charming for you. Let’s dance, princess.”

I kicked and screamed all the way home. Shane and Sue danced in the rain until we were all dizzy. They laughed, talked, and held hands until she couldn’t control the shivering any longer, and Shane demanded she go home and warm up. All the while, I was cussing like a sailor in my head, enraged at the way she was treating my body… and my ex-fiancé.

“You go take a hot shower. I’ll make some cocoa,” Shane offered, landing a kiss on my forehead.

“I think I’ll run a bath and soak my bones for a bit. So take your time on the cocoa, okay?” I could feel the muscles in my face pulling into a smile. I wanted to slap it off, but I would be the one to feel the pain.

Once the bathroom door was closed and the water running, Sue finally started talking to me again.

“Calm down. Everything’s fine,” she said, dumping a cap full of bubble bath in the tub.

Not even close, Sue. Shane and I’ve worked really hard to find a place where we can be together as friends. And in one day—ONE DAY—you manage to chuck it in the trash.

“You can’t lie to me, Isabel. I know why you’re really angry.”

Oh really? Enlighten me.

“You’re angry because he responded.”

I snorted. But she was sort of right. I was angry because she had tossed my deepest feelings out to the wind. Things I never would have said out loud, things I was determined to keep buried. And the way he looked at her…

“You mean the way he looked at you,” she said pointedly, stepping into the warm tub.

Even from my disconnected place, I could feel the water relaxing away the tension in my muscles.

I can’t be with him, Sue. What you did, it wasn’t fair. Not to either of us.

“I gave you a gift, Isabel, just like you gave me. You let me have a day in your body, and I used it to give you something amazing. A second chance.”

I didn’t ask you to do that.

“And you never would. You’re so stubborn that you’d let yourself be completely miserable before you admitted you made a mistake.”

It wasn’t…wasn’t a mistake. It was a choice, a rational, informed, difficult choice.

“He loves you. You love him. It’s wrong that you aren’t together. You should be happy.”

Happiness is fleeting. Happiness is just the calm before the storm. And the happier you are, the more you have to lose when it hits.

“I know all about losing what you love. Remember, I lost my child, my husband. My life. And even after a hundred years of wandering, of feeling lost and alone, I wouldn’t take back one moment of the joy I had then. I wouldn’t trade one second of that love for a lifetime alone.”

She was rubbing lavender soap up our arms. The smell was wonderful. I let it calm me.

I want a normal life, Sue. A husband and a family. I want kids and a real house with a swing in the backyard. I didn’t want vampires, darkness, and blood. I didn’t want any of this.

“I know,” she soothed as she washed. “Life isn’t fair. We don’t always get what we want. Sometimes, we have to learn to want what we have. It’s the only way to be happy.”

I sighed internally as we sunk down into tub.

“You know, you can still have that. You can be with the man you love. You can even have a family. It’s not impossible.”

But I’ll grow old. He’ll have to watch me die.

“If you are always worrying about the future, you’ll never enjoy the present. Then you’ll get to the end of your life and realize you wasted it.”

I didn’t know what to say to that. This unwelcome guest had become my own personal therapist, something I apparently really needed. I couldn’t hide anything from her, couldn’t lie or fall back on the bitterness that had been my companion for so long. The truth was, when he looked at us today, it was just like he used to look at me. With love in his eyes. And as mortified as I was at what she’d said to him, she didn’t lie. They were all my feelings too.

So what do we do now?

“Well, I’m going to dry off, then we are going to go have some hot chocolate. I still have a few hours left.”

Okay, but Sue?

“I know. Don’t kiss Shane.”

i

Sue changed into a pair of comfy, flannel pajama pants and an old grey T-shirt. She combed through my hair and braided it perfectly down my back. Braiding my own hair was a skill I never mastered, but she made it look easy. She made a lot of things seem easy.

Shane was in the living room, two cups of hot chocolate complete with little marshmallows sat on the coffee table next to three white takeout boxes. The table was set with square green plates, chopsticks, and a stack of napkins.

“Wow, what’s this?”

He smiled sheepishly. “I thought you might be hungry. I know it’s kind of early for dinner, but we ate an early lunch so…”

“No, it’s wonderful. Very thoughtful.”

Shane sat down and Sue followed, folding one leg under the other, a favorite move of mine, which made me wonder if physical habits became biological rather than intellectual impulses.

He opened the first box and scooped a helping of Lo Mien noodles onto our plates.

“I got you Cashew Chicken. I hope that’s alright.”

“Sounds good.”

He finished dishing out the food. Carefully, Sue picked up the chopsticks. She faltered. I could sense her confusion. She’d never used them before. I tried to show her, in my head, how to place her fingers. But she just couldn’t seem to follow. I understood. It was hard to teach someone to use chopsticks, even if you were proficient with them. It was a skill honed in years of practice. Perhaps biological impulses didn’t apply to learned skills.

Here, give me control of my hand.

I felt her relax, just a fraction. I wiggled my fingers. Shane was staring at us out of the corner of his eye.

“My hand’s sore,” Sue said as I flexed the hand, picking up the chopsticks and grabbing a piece of noodle.

It felt stupid, clumsy, and awkward. Like that game where you put your arms behind your back and someone else tried to be your arms for you. Then I realized the problem. I couldn’t make the arm move to bring the food to my mouth. We were just staring at the food like it might crawl off the sticks.

Here, hold your hand like this. Okay, now take it back.

I let myself slip out of the hand and she slipped back in, slowly bringing the food to our mouth.

“Everything okay?” Shane asked, his eyes suspicious.

With her empty hand, she pointed to the bandage. “Concussion,” she said after swallowing.

He rolled his eyes. “How long are you gonna use that one?”

Sue shrugged. “Until it stops working, I suppose.”

He raised one eyebrow. “Yeah, well, I draw the line at cleaning the dishes.”

She pouted, jutting out my bottom lip. Shane snickered.

“Fine. I’ll do dishes.” He took a bite of his own dinner. “This is going to be a really long recovery, huh?”

She nodded, and for once, I agreed.

“Oh, before I forget.” He scooped up the remote and clicked on the TV. “I put in your favorite movie.”

Terminator
,
I answered Sue’s silent question so she wouldn’t have to spend precious time digging through my memories for the information.

“Terminator?” she said, her voice barely concealing her shock.

“No. Okay, well, your second favorite movie.” He chuckled, his discomfort easing away, and held up a DVD case. “Labyrinth.”

Internally, I squealed
.
Mmmmm, David Bowi
e
.

“Mmmmm, David Bowie,” Sue repeated with a smirk.

Shane hit play and Sue sat back, snuggling into Shane’s side. He stiffened for just a moment, and then exhaled. He reached over, snatched the noodle box, and grabbed a bite, holding it out to me. Sue leaned forward, slurping the noodles off his chopsticks, mesmerized by the movie.

I had to admit—I had a dream like this sometimes. It didn’t involve me being possessed…

Sue chuckled.

…but it was this. Shane and me, just like the old days. Part of me wanted to just relax and enjoy the moment, but a nagging voice wondered how the hell I was going to explain all of this tomorrow.

The credits rolled up the screen and we sat up, stretching. It was already dark, but not nearly as late as it felt.

“Tired?” Shane asked, switching off the movie.

“No, not really,” Sue said, hiding a yawn behind a fist.

“Uh-huh. Come on. I’ll walk you to bed.”

“I know the way,” Sue said jokingly. “But really, I don’t want this day to end yet.”

Shane sat forward. “You know, despite what you think, you aren’t going to have to shuffle off at midnight. You don’t have to turn into a pumpkin. We can have tomorrow. And the next day, and the next…”

His blue eyes were so sincere, so hopeful. I could feel my heart cracking along the carefully repaired pieces.

Sue answered, her eyes heavy. “I wish that were true. Honestly, I don’t know how I’m going to feel about any of this tomorrow. There might not even be a tomorrow, not for me.”

He turned his head, concerned. “Why would you say that?”

She held out my hands, palms up. “Because I’m human, Shane. I could have a heart attack in my sleep, or get hit by a bus or,” she touched the bandage, “slip in the stupid shower. There are a million little things that could keep me from waking up in the morning.”

“What are you saying?”

She sighed. “I don’t know. Just feeling melancholy, I suppose.”

Whatever he was thinking, he shook it off. Standing up, he took me by the hands. “Come on, Cinderella. You’re just tired.”

Sue nodded and let him walk me up the stairs. We paused outside my door. Shane raked his hand through his hair. He looked… unsettled.

This is i
t
, Sue said inside my head.

“What?” I said, realizing too late it was out loud.

Sue had retreated, and I’d slipped back into the driver’s seat seamlessly.

It’s time for your gift. This moment. This is where you choose. Say goodnight and go to your room, lock your door, and go to bed alone, or…

“It’s just today,” Shane said, shifting himself so he was close to me, almost touching me. “I feel like you let me in today in a way you never have before. I’m afraid that I’ll walk away and tomorrow things will be back to—back to how they were yesterday.”

“Is friendship so bad?” I asked, trying to swallow the lump in my throat.

“I didn’t think so. I thought everything was fine. It was working. We were working. I didn’t realize…” He looked away.

“Realize what?”

Shane took a deep breath. Looking back to me, he held my gaze. “I didn’t realize you were as miserable as I was.” He closed the gap between us, pressing me against the line of his body. I was trapped between him and the closed door. There was no graceful way out. No way to move without it being a rejection. And truth be told, I liked the feel of it.

“Being so close to you has been miserable. I’ve wanted so badly for things to be the way they were between us again, back before… I want to be able to reach out and touch your cheek.” He reached up and grazed my cheek with the tips of his fingers. “Or kiss your mouth…” He closed his eyes. Lifting my chin, he leaned forward.

I was dizzy. Everything was moving so quickly that I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. My heart was pounding like hummingbird wings in my chest. Deep in the back of my mind, Sue smiled.

Consequence
s
, I tried to remind myself.

Oh, shut up
,
Sue scolded me.

And for once in my life, I listened. Shane was just a fraction of an inch from my face. I closed my eyes, swallowing the doubt, the panic gnawing at my belly, and I kissed him.