Changing Tides (Kill Devil Hills Book 2) (12 page)

But my anxious feelings quickly subsided—because Nathanial was on some sort of afterglow, post-sex high. He kept pressing kisses to different parts of my skin—in a sleepy, loving, lazy sort of way. His gentle way put me at ease.

“Stop it,” I warned, stifling a laugh when he kissed a spot that was way too ticklish.

“You’re so sexy, I can’t help it.” He smiled, pulling me in closer against his hot skin. The couch was just big enough for us both to fit side-by-side. “I’m tired,” he yawned, nestling his face into my neck. “My internal clock is on Morocco time and it’s probably about three in the morning there.”

“You want to go to sleep now?” I asked. I’d never been more awake.

“No. I don’t want to miss anything. Like these fine tits.” He held me tighter with his large hands. His boyish antics kept making me smile. “And I want to hear more about you.”

“Like what?”

“Like everything.”

“Well, what I want to know is why your ex didn’t take this couch? Because it is seriously the coziest thing I’ve ever been on.” I probably should have kept my mouth shut about the stupid couch, taken a play out of Noah’s book and kept my thoughts to myself, but I asked it anyway—being my typical noisy self.

He didn’t seem upset that I’d asked and answered my question. “It wasn’t hers to take. It was my granddad’s couch. When I got my first apartment on my own, he gave it to me. It’s still in good shape, big enough to fit all of me on it, and comfy enough to sleep on when you find yourself without a bed. So yeah, I’m never getting rid of this thing. And I especially love it now that we’ve christened it. Kelly would have never let me fuck her on this couch.”

“Kelly Patterson?”

“Yes.”

I swallowed. I’m not sure why I hadn’t put it together earlier or freaking remembered. His ex was Kelly Patterson
—
as in his co-star from Dragon Wars
!
I didn’t pay attention to celebrity gossip, I couldn’t care less about who dated who in Hollywood, but my kid sister was obsessed with the stuff. Rosie was constantly telling me way too much against my will. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew they were together. Kelly was incredibly beautiful, talented, and loveable. Hell, I think she even had her own charity. She was a classy woman—so, of course, she wouldn’t have let him fuck her on a couch.

Maybe Nathanial didn’t mean anything by his couch comment—but for some reason, it stung. He wasn’t mine. He’d never be mine. When tomorrow morning came we would cease to exist—so I shouldn’t have been upset by his words. But strangely enough, I was.

“Don’t do it,” he whispered.

“Do what?” I asked.

“Compare yourself to Kelly.”

I sat up, pulling away from him, my heart thumping immediately. “Isn’t that what you were just doing? When you said I fuck on couches and she doesn’t. That sounded like a clear-cut comparison to me.” My eyes scanned his room, searching for my clothes. I found my underwear beside me on the couch and I quickly shimmied them on. Then I remembered that the rest of my stuff was downstairs.

Dammit.

“No,” he said firmly. “Okay. Fine, yes, I was comparing you to her.”

I groaned and hopped off the couch. I didn’t care that I was topless—my hands landed on my hips and I glared at him. “Fuck you. So that’s what I am…I’m the rebound girl.”

This realization hit me hard.

Nathanial stood up. Damn him too, because when he stood in all his fine, tall, naked glory—despite how angry I was at him—the powerful presence of him in front of me gave me goose bumps. “You, Ellie, are extraordinary,” he said with conviction, staring down at me, making me hold my breath as I listened to all he had to say. “I was attracted to you before we met on the plane. I noticed you in airport security, laughing with your friends, and you know what I thought? I thought
,
she must be different.
When I was with Kelly, somehow I’d convinced myself that everything was better than it was. And when she cheated on me, I was blindsided. But you know what I’ve learned today…that I was completely miserable with her and I didn’t even realize it. I gave up so much of myself trying to be exactly what she wanted, and at the end of the day that still wasn’t enough. You know what I love about spending time with you? That I never once have had to fake anything. Every moment with you has felt more real than anything I’ve ever experienced in my life. I’m sorry I compared you to my ex. But know this…you are no rebound girl.”

I took a deep breath, unsure if I was convinced.

If his words were true, then they were kind and amazing. If they were untrue, then I was just a silly little girl who’d believed the first handsome man who had looked her way. I prided myself on being strong and in control. Right now I felt neither. “Well then, I’m going to sleep. On the couch,” I told him. “I think it would be best if you slept in another room.”

I plopped down onto the cushy, brown suede, confused as hell, mad as hell, and sad as hell. Ugh. This really was the worst vacation ever. I’d turned my fun vacation sex into something incredibly complicated. And the worst part was, I knew deep down that I was intentionally sabotaging this.

“If that’s what you want, I’ll be downstairs in the living room,” he said, moving toward his backpack on the floor. He unzipped it, pulling free a t-shirt and a pair of boxers—which he handed to me. I took what he gave me and held the clothes over my bare chest. Then he slung the bag over his shoulder and said one more thing, “If there is any chance that I mean more to you than the ‘experiment’ you originally wanted to use me for, then please come find me. I’d rather spend the rest of the night together than apart.”

And then he was gone.

CHAPTER 13:

NATHANIAL

L
aying on my living room floor, I struggled to find sleep. Not because of where I was—I normally could sleep just about anywhere—but because of everything else. I’d come downstairs, put away the sushi leftovers, folded the clothes that had been discarded all across my kitchen floor, and then tried to settle down on the blankets in the living room. I didn’t even bother getting dressed because I wasn’t ready to admit that my night with Ellie was over.

Even though I knew it was.

I’d meant what I’d said. When I was with Kelly, I was trying too hard to be the perfect boyfriend, so focused o
n
he
r
happiness that I hardly even noticed how tiring it all was. And at the end of the day, she’d cheated on me anyway. Being with Ellie was freeing. She was open and honest, fun and easy-going, all in a way that made it impossible not to be anything but genuine around her. And the way those qualities had translated during sex…well, it made for the deepest intimacy I’d ever experienced. I’d never been a spiritual guy, but being with her was pretty damn close to heaven. Like bring me fucking knees close to heaven.

Images of her magnificent body and the pleasure that had flashed across her face when I brought her to her orgasm—those images would not stop floating across my mind, haunting me, teasing me. I wondered if it was all for nothing. Maybe we were doomed from the very start—nothing more than a casual fling that was never meant to go past a quickie in an airplane bathroom.

Groaning, I flipped onto my back and stared at the clear, inky black night outside.The wind had picked up speed and the noise was distracting, but I was too lazy to get up to close the windows. I contemplated going to Ellie. Actually, it was taking a good deal of strengt
h
no
t
to go to her, but I had my pride and I’d already given her my terms. If she wanted to pursue this further then she would have to come to me. I didn’t know Ellie very well, but I would bet money on her being the proud and stubborn type, exactly like myself.

So the next thing that happened couldn’t have shocked me more.

Ellie pulled back the blanket that covered my body, startling me with her sudden presence, and moved to straddle my hips
.
Holy shit!
My chest expanded and my heart went soft. It was a giant gesture. She’d put everything aside, her fears and my stubbornness, and she’d come to me.

I sat up, catching her face in my hands, and I kissed her. I was so surprised and thrilled that a laugh left my throat, which had to be the worst reaction for the moment, but I was too overwhelmed and amazed by Ellie to care.

“I lasted a whole ten minutes without you,” she whispered against my mouth, her voice a little gravelly, possibly with emotion.

“Those ten minutes were agony,” I admitted, brushing her hair from face and smiling at her. “Pure torture. Don’t do that to me again.”

Her eyes were a wild blue color as she said, “I won’t.”

I knew then, whether she realized it or not, that I had this girl’s heart. One day. One day was all it took. She had my heart too—so I didn’t care how crazy or foolish all of this was.

She was dressed in my t-shirt and boxers, and as much as I liked her wearing my clothes, I couldn’t get her naked fast enough. Nothing was holding us back and the heat between us grew and exploded. We had a mini repeat of history—where I didn’t have a condom and had to go find one. Luckily in my haste to exit my own bedroom, I’d grabbed my backpack and inside it I had more. I grabbed one and hurried back to her. It was too damn chilly in my house, and I needed the warmth of her body. She laughed when I playfully dove on top of her, slipping in under the blankets beside her.

Her hands ran lightly over my skin, touching me in ways she hadn’t the first time we’d been together. Ellie was growing bolder. I knew now that she must have been holding back before…and, well, she wasn’t holding back anything now. My body appreciated the hell out of her new found courage, while my mind was apprehensive. Then she reached down between our bodies and grabbed my cock, her fingers gentle but sure. “Ellie,” I whispered as my thoughts turned erratic. I knew she was exploring, but she didn’t have to do anything she wasn’t ready for.

“I’ve never even touched a man, do you realize that? I’d never eve
n
see
n
a man, outside of a porn video, before you. So, obviously, I’ve neve
r
kisse
d
a man either.” Her hand squeezed a little harder as she stroked up and down my length. “And I really want to try kissing you.”

“Ellie,” I repeated, grasping the meaning of her wor
d
kis
s
. I was hesitant…and yet, so turned on I could scream. I wanted to skip all this foreplay and get down to the best part. “Let me do this for you, okay?” she asked. “Let me try.”

I could barely breathe, let alone speak. Moving had become impossible, my muscles on hiatus, as she inched down my body. I felt her hardened nipples brush against my chest, then my abs as she moved into place. It was such a divine feeling. Then she pushed my legs wider apart and leaned in even closer. My eyes were glued to the ceiling because I knew if I so much as glanced down at her, I’d probably explode before I’d even given her the change to try anything.

Part of me wanted to stop her.

Part of me wanted to let her continue doing whatever the hell she wanted.

Growling from the pleasure and the sweet agony of my dilemma, I felt as her soft mouth pressed carefully against me. She gave me a kiss, then a lick, and then she took all of me into her mouth. The warmth and wetness of her had my already fully erect cock growing even more painfully hard. She hadn’t really done much, but just the idea of it all had me turning too damn sensitive. Then she moved, stroking me up and down with her mouth, and I immediately felt like my balls were in my throat.

If I let her continue then everything would be over in seconds.

“Ellie, baby, that feels amazing.” I combed my fingers through her soft, short hair, soaking up the wonderful feeling of her mouth. “But I want inside you. I want to come together.”

She stopped. I heard a small pop as she released my cock from her mouth.

“Okay,” she said, annoyance in her voice—almost like she was pissed I’d stopped her.

The wildest roar left my lips. Her annoyance was the sexiest damn thing on earth.

I sat up and grabbed her waist, yanking her up against my body. Her tattooed pale skin looked beautiful against my darker, tanned skin. “Did you like having my cock in your mouth?” I asked, groaning because I already knew the answer to my question. I ran my hands over her back then palmed her ass in my hands, pressing her tightly against me. I was positioned right where it needed to be and I rocked against her, creating a little bit of friction.

She nodded again my chest.

“Then there is no fucking way you’re a lesbian.”

“I don’t know what I am,” she whispered.

“And I don’t need definition. But I need you to acknowledge that there is a powerful attraction here. You feel it right?

She nodded again.

“Good. Me too.”

I flipped her over so that I could be on top. My heart was beating so hard that I could feel the vibrations throughout my entire body. “I want to make love to you now,” I told her.

“I want the same,” she muttered, her voice raw as she stared up at me with wide eyes.

Jesus Christ, she was the prettiest thing I’d ever seen.

I found the condom I’d grabbed earlier, ripped open the wrapper, and rolled it on while staying in place on top of her. Once ready, I thrust deep into her warmth. She cried out, arching against me, while I grunted, “I love fucking you.” Normally I wasn’t one for words during sex, but sinking inside her was absolute perfection, so much so that I had to compliment her on it. “I know you’ve only been with me in this way,” I whispered, holding still for a moment. “But it isn’t like this with everyone. It’s another level with you.”

I wanted to go crazy on her body like I had our first time together, but I knew I had to keep things slow and gentle this time. I didn’t want to hurt her. And I wanted to show her that all of this meant more to me than simply getting each other off.

Rolling my hips, I started a gentle pace. She breathed in rhythm to each thrust of my cock. Her hands moved above her head as she stared into my eyes. I kissed her open mouth and kept my movements strong. For as tough and take-charge as this girl was, when I was buried deep inside her, everything changed. She looked at me with awe and for guidance. I loved that—how she relinquished control and trusted me so completely. It was what made sex with her exceptionally intense.

After what felt like no time at all, she called out my name in the same warning tone she used on me before. I knew she was close. Thank God too—because I could barely last another second. Then it happened. She wrapped her arms forcefully around my shoulders, moaning my name into my ear, and I felt as her body shuddered under me. That was it for me. Electricity and heat burst through me, taking me hostage. Growling at the overwhelming pleasure of it all, I snaked my arms under her, clutching her fine ass, and I held her close against me as I unleashed all of me inside her. Three minutes…four minutes…I don’t know how long we were pressed so firmly together but it was pure heaven on earth to me. I’d be forever ruined by this girl.

After, exhaustion overwhelmed me and as hard as I fought it, I couldn’t help it when sleep took its hold over me.

* * *

I woke up the next morning to a horrible back cramp. Grumbling, I stretched out my body, trying to shake off the ache. No more screwing around—I was buying a bed today. Even if I had to call my assistant on her day off and have her order it online for me, I was getting it done. Rolling over, I reached out for Ellie. My fingers ran over the fluffy material of the blanket we’d shared
—
col
d
fluffy material.

Where was she?

My mind jumped to the worst possible outcome. She was gone.

I sat up so fast that my head spun, and I had to press my palm to my forehead because of it. It was too damn early and I felt nausea.

“Let me guess,” said a voice, “you are not a morning person. Figures. We morning people are a very rare breed.”

The voice was Ellie’s. She hadn’t abandoned me in the night. She was here, fully dressed and sitting at my kitchen counter. I smiled at the sight of her. My morning just got a whole lot better. If I woke up to her in my house every morning, I might have to become a morning person too.

“I hope you don’t mind—I was starving so I’m eating your leftovers.” Our sushi leftovers were on a plate in front of her. She turned to glance at the clock on my stove. “Plus it’s like eleven on the East Coast.”

Standing to my feet, I grabbed the blanket and tied it around my waist. Then I padded across the open space to join her in the kitchen. Her eyes were bright and alert, her cheeks rosy and her hair slightly wet. “Did you shower?” I asked, wishing she would have let me join her. That would have been a much better wakeup call than the hard floor.

She nodded as she popped another bite of sushi into her mouth and stood to put the last of it back in the fridge. “Yes. And your bathroom is the shit, by the way. The shower was like my own personal waterfall, being that it had four showerheads and all. Very cool. Oh, and your cat scared me half to death this morning.”

“Did she?”

“Yeah. She was curled up with us on the floor when I woke up.”

I moved to grab Ellie in my arms and give her a hug, maybe even drag her upstairs for another shower—because picturing her all wet and soapy was truly the sweetest thing. But she stilled at my approach, growing apprehensive of my nearness, and I stopped before I had the chance to touch her. “What’s wrong?”

She swallowed, staring up at me for a moment. Then she walked around me, digging in her tan bag, purposely avoiding eye contact. “I’m freaking the fuck out. To be honest.”

My heart started to pound.

“Last night was perfect, but I’ve never been more confused in my entire life.” She breathed in and out a few times, throwing me a small half-smile in between breaths. “I have never questioned my sexuality—never given it a second thought. And now I’m not sure about anything. I need to get home. I need to figure this out. Noah should be here any minute to drive us all to the airport. He switched our flights. So yeah…I’m leaving.”

I sat down on one of my barstools and let her words marinate. Leaving. Now. “What time is your flight?”

“Ten something.”

Just then the intercom rang. Holy shit. This was happening way too fast. I moved for the little box to answer the buzzer. Sure enough, it was Noah. I told him to drive up. A feeling of panic started to set in as an invisible clock started to tick down. The pressure made my stomach feel like it was filling with cement. Meanwhile, Ellie was so fucking nonchalant. Or at least that was what I thought at first. Until I noticed her eyes were filling with tears. And she kept running her fingers through her hair, as if that would keep me for noticing that she was getting emotional. “You’re crying,” I muttered.