Changing Lanes (The Lone Stars Book 3) (24 page)

“That sounds fun. My parents only took me to medical conferences.” Now that Laney said it out loud, it sounded worse than it was.

“I’m sorry. That sounds bad.” CoCo’s eyes turned sympathetic.

Was Laney about to fall under CoCo’s protection?

“I’m not going to lie, it was dull.” All she’d done was sat in the hotel room waiting for her parents to return. They’d always promised to take her somewhere fun, but never did.

CoCo thought for a minute and then said. “We’re all going to Elliot’s Oyster House after this. I hope you and Devon can come.”

“Thanks, I’d love to, but I need to check with Devon.” Laney’s stomach rumbled. “I’m hungry and fresh oysters sound wonderful.”

“They have the best. And they serve them however you want. I like on the half–shell with lots of lemon.” CoCo’s intensity was fading and a genuine warmth was taking over.

“That’s my favorite way to eat oysters too.” Her stomach rumbled again. “That sounds really good.”

Two hours later, Laney pushed back from her seventieth tray of fresh oysters and stared down Big Billy Gains. “Want to keep going? I can do this all day.”

Big Billy was looking a little green. He’d challenged her to an eating contest and he was losing … and not gracefully.

“I would have never believed it if I hadn’t seen it with my own two eyes.” Coach Robbins had acquired his current amazed look right around tray number ten. “She’s a tray ahead of Big Billy and doesn’t show any signs of slowing down.”

“That’s a real woman who can eat like that.” An African American football player named Keshaun smiled and his gold front teeth winked in the fluorescent light. “When you get tired of white bread over there, give me a call.”

Devon put his arm around Laney. “Coach is it okay if I kill him? Sure, he’s a pretty good running back, but we have like six more.”

“Nah, I like him. He gives great Secret Santa gifts.” Coach Robbins clapped Keshaun on the shoulder. “Besides, Grace gets mad when she has to wash blood out of my clothes.”

“Uh oh.” Laney pointed to Big Billy. “Someone grab him, he’s about to lose his oysters.”

A couple of the offensive line sprang into action and helped Big Billy up and over to the closest bathroom, she hoped. They were in the Elliot Bay private dining room to keep them away from the very vocal Seattle Seahawk fans. Devon had explained that it was okay to do things as a team in Seattle before the game as long as they did it private, but after they beat the crap out of the Seahawks, it wasn’t healthy to be seen out in public.

That kind of made sense.

Devon pulled Laney in for a half hug and then kept his arm around her. “I’m going to keep her. I’m thinking of putting her picture up at my restaurant with a big sign saying that whoever can out eat her gets their meal for free.”

“You’ll never have to give anything away. That’s a safe bet.” Coach Robbins nodded. “Truly amazing.”

“I know.” Clint, Summer’s husband, still looked stunned. “I can’t wait to tell Summer. She’s going to show up at your house with food. My Summer is a feeder. She likes cooking for others, and now that she has someone who can really eat, she’s going to see that as a challenge.”

“Summer likes to bake.” Devon added helpfully.

“I look forward to the challenge.” Laney snagged Big Billy’s uneaten tray from the other side of the table and pulled it over. “I love food.”

She picked up the closest oyster and downed it.

“Amazing.” Coach Robbins couldn’t move past the amount of food she could put away.

“I remember Big Billy being tougher than that.” A large man two tables over who Laney thought might be on the defensive line shook his head. “We’re going to have to call him Hurl from now on.”

“I still don’t know where she puts it.” Said an African American man at the same table. “What do you weigh like one–ten soaking wet?”

“It’s a gift.” Devon patted her slightly pooching stomach. He was so proud.

Laney smiled to herself. It was nice to finally have a boyfriend who appreciated everything about her.

“How about dessert?” Devon picked up the dessert menu. “I’m thinking the Fried Chocolate Truffle Sundae.”

“Ooooo. Now you’re speaking my language. That sounds good.” Laney finished off Big Billy’s oysters.

“And she’s going to eat more.” Clint pulled out his smartphone and clicked a photo of Laney. “Sorry, just had to capture this moment.”

“I bet she’s fun at an all–you–can–eat buffet.” Coach Robbins grinned at her.

“After the first thirty minutes, they usually offer to give it to me for free if I agree to leave. I’ve been banned from Buffet Palace for life. My picture’s on the podium up front, and the hostess knows to not let me in. Apparently the all–you–can–eat snow crab legs do have a limit.” Laney used to be embarrassed by that, but it appeared amongst the football community she was a rock star.

“That’s my girl.” Devon slid his hand down her back and absently rubbed her lower back. It felt fantastic.

“You’re so lucky.” Keshaun sulked. “My girlfriend won’t eat carbs, or protein, or salad dressing, or dessert. On our last date, all she ate were green peas. She spent most of the night chasing them around the plate with her fork.”

CoCo sat down next to him. “That’s because your girlfriend is a skanky gold digger who only wants your money. You need to date someone with more substance.”

“She wants me to buy her a Mercedes Benz roadster.” He studied his shoes.

“Dump her.” CoCo rolled her eyes. “You better not buy her that car. If you do, I’ll never speak to you again.”

“Okay.” He blushed, well would have blushed if his skin hadn’t been a lovely shade of tobacco brown. “Where do you meet the good ones?”

“We’ve talked about this. Meeting women at a strip club is not a good idea.” CoCo’s voice was very put–upon. “The grocery store is good, or have a friend set you up. Ask Grace or Laney.”

Laney sifted through her mind for a single someone for Keshaun. None of her teammates would do for him. “There is a nurse who works in recovery who would be perfect for you. Her name is Krystal.”

His whole face lit up. “Really? Maybe you could give me her number, or I’ll give you mine.”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a business card. He turned his huge brown puppy dog eyes on Laney. “Here’s my card. It has all of my numbers. Maybe you could give it to her … and tell her that I’m a good guy?”

“Sure.” Never in a million years would Laney have thought she’d be fixing up football players with her coworkers. Devon brought so much to her life and had included her one hundred percent in his. Things were working out nicely.

Chapter 20

Two weeks later, Lara slipped into a coma. The end was near. As Laney sat holding one of Lara’s sweet little hands with Sweet Louise holding the other, Laney racked her brain for a treatment that she hadn’t tried. Maybe there was something new—a new drug, anything, but she knew there wasn’t. She’d tried everything and had failed. She felt this failure all the way down to her soul.

For the first time in a long time, Laney embraced the tears and let them flow. Devon held her and patted her back—words weren’t necessary. It was nice to be held and comforted—to let someone else shoulder the pain for just a bit. Not too long ago, she’d thought that showing emotion was a sign of weakness, now she just accepted it as part of who she was. Crying did offer some relief, if only a temporary one.

The aching emptiness and finality of death left a gaping hole in Laney’s heart. One day soon, she would have to say goodbye to Lara forever. No longer would she be able to see this beautiful little girl, or hear her voice, or see her smile. Lara wouldn’t ever go trick–or–treating again, or fail a math test or fall in love, or kiss her puppy, or get married, or have a family of her own. It was a waste of a perfectly lovely soul. Right now, she wanted to punch God right in the face for giving her this precious little girl and then taking her away. It wasn’t fair or right—there was no justice in it. No amount of planning had prepared her for losing Lara. Death was nothing new to Laney, but right now she wanted to knee him right in the balls.

“Do you believe in heaven?” Laney glanced up at nothing in particular. “She asked me that a couple of weeks ago. I told her that I didn’t know, but that I hoped there was a heaven. I want there to be one…for her.”

“I know that when the time comes, her soul will find peace and love in heaven. I know it.” Sweet Louise wiped her own tears and looked down at Lara with a heart breaking love that was so intense and beautiful that it would span years and lifetimes.

It was like looking in a mirror. That’s how Laney felt about Lara. Death couldn’t stop what she felt for Lara and no amount of time would change it. Laney’s soul would love Lara forever.

The concept of soul had always fascinated Laney. As an analytical person, she’d never quite wrapped her head around the idea, but she knew that every person had one. “A twentieth century doctor named Duncan McDougall hypothesized that the soul weighed twenty–one ounces. He weighed people before and after death and found that one actually weighed three–quarters of an ounce less after death. He hypothesized that was the soul. Of course there are many other reasons that a person could weigh less.”

“Of course it is child.” Sweet Louise patted her hand.

“There’s an Anesthesiologist in Arizona who has some interesting theories on the soul and a quantum consciousness. Using quantum physics to explain that an item can be in two places at once, he thinks that microtubules in the brain working independently of conscious thought are actually part of a quantum consciousness. When a person dies, those microtubules return to that quantum consciousness.” Laney glanced up. She wasn’t sure what she was hoping to see … a universal consciousness floating around?

Was her soul still here or had it moved on?

“I prefer to think of it as heaven.” Sweet Louise dried her eyes. “I need to believe in that so I’ll go on thinking of her sweet face waiting for me when I get there.”

Laney had never thought of it that way. What did she need to believe? Science had always spoken to her, but that was because she was able to make sense out of it. But did she believe it?

She needed to believe that Lara would be safe and happy and healthy. She needed to believe that there would be someone looking out for the little girl. She needed to believe that she’d see Lara again healthy and whole. But more than anything, right now, she wanted to tell Lara how much she loved her. It was important. The part of her that had stayed numb to death could no longer hide from it. She cared and loved her patients. Separating it was just an illusion.

The evidence was pretty overwhelming that coma patients could understand what was going on around them.

Leaning down close to Lara’s ear, Laney swallowed back the flood of tears clogging her throat, “I love you little one … always.”

It struck her that she never remembered saying ‘I love you’ to anyone. Surely she’d told her parents when she was young. But as she’d gotten older, sentiment had not only been shunned but not tolerated at home. She’d been taught that tears were useless and that emotion equaled weakness.

Her cell buzzed with a new text. She wiped her face with her sleeve and pulled out the phone. “ER–STAT!” Glowed in white letters against the blue background. “I have to go. I have a patient in trouble.”

“Can’t someone else take this one?” Devon loosened his arms but didn’t let go. “You need a moment to gather yourself.”

“There is no one else. I’m the doctor on call. This is my job.” No time to think—onto the next emergency. She wanted to run away—curl up in a ball on her office floor and hide, but that wasn’t an option. And she didn’t hide from anything.

She shook off Devon’s arms and rose. “I have to go.”

She sifted through her current sick patient list and the only name that came to mind was Lincoln Lafferty—a twelve year–old–boy fighting like hell with Leukemia. He had horned–rimmed glasses and Harry Potter hair. Her arms ached to hug him and tell him that everything would be okay.

The message buzzed again. “Sorry.”

She took off at a run, hit the stairs, and took them to the first floor. She just wanted a day—one day when she didn’t have to face down death. That was selfish—her patients didn’t get a day off. Still, she desperately wanted one day when it didn’t weigh heavily on her mind. This was the life she had chosen or rather, the life that had chosen her. Medicine—especially pediatrics—was a calling that she hadn’t been able to ignore.

She put the tears away and tried to don her professional armor … but there were holes in it now. Big, glaring holes that let love in. She was so damned tired … tired of pretending that she didn’t care. Maybe caring was the key to fixing the broken bodies? If so, it was a small price to pay for saving a life.

She made it to the Emergency wing out of breath and rattled. He was in room six.

Lincoln sat up eating a chocolate pudding cup and bleeding from the central line right under his clavicle.

“He yanked it playing football.” Michael the nurse in charge rolled his eyes up to Laney’s as he blotted blood with four–by–four gauze squares.