Caught (7 page)

I slowly inch my way closer. With each step I know we’re about to take our trio to a level it’s never been, and it’s one that could destroy us. That alone should have me jumping ship. But I can’t. I have this whole ‘what if’ feeling flooding me. Along with a lot of horny feelings. What if we do this and it makes Chace realize that he does have feelings for me? That he cares for me more than just as a best friend? It’s selfish and oh so wrong, I know. But then I tell myself that this was never my idea. So the blame won’t ever be able to come back on me.

Just even more heartbreak might.

I stop once I’m right in front of him, leaving mere inches between us. Kissing guys has never been a problem for me. I’ve been called the make out queen and other names as well. But for some reason I can’t just force myself to push up on my feet and press my lips to his. I don’t want it to feel like it does with all the other guys—meaningless. And I don’t want him to think that to me he’s just like the rest.

Finley inches her way out and says something along the lines of, “I’ll be waiting in my bed for you two.” I think she’s really stupid right now for leaving us in here alone. You don’t give a thief the keys to your car and tell them to return it in a few hours.

I focus on his chest, watching the water trickle down. I firmly place my hands where my eyes are focused and feel him slightly shake. His chest rises and falls, and I let my hands move up and down, unsure of what to really do, but more than enjoying the closeness.

“Chace,” I whisper, shaking my head. This is wrong. I care about our friendship too much.

“D-don’t,” he stutters, grabbing the sides of my face with his strong hands. He pulls my face up to his and watches me closely with his eyes filled with desire. His hands twist into my wet hair, and his lips crash onto mine. His lips are soft and possessive. He isn’t sloppy or giving me drunk kisses like I’m used to for the most part. He’s very much in control, and it makes me think that this isn’t just a drunken haze that he’ll regret in the morning. Maybe he’s actually fully aware of what we’re doing…just like I am.

My hands move to his sides and drift up and down before gripping his hips. I instinctively pull him into me. I feel his hardness press against my stomach, and I uncontrollably moan against his mouth. He’s still hard. So hard. And right now he’s hard for me.  This closeness that seems so outlandish yet familiar only fuels our fire. My mind and heart completely close themselves off, allowing my body to go full throttle.

His lips never leave mine as his hands cup my ass. He grips it harder, pulling me into him. I wrap my hands around his neck and jump, tightening my legs around his waist. I’m not an expert in this department, but I’m ready for whatever he has to give.

“How ‘bout we move this to the bed?” Chace whispers against my skin. A sinking feeling hits me that he’s done leaving his girlfriend out of this equation, but once his lips return to mine my body regains control, kicking my stupid brain and heart back to the curb. He tightly holds onto me as he pulls the curtain back, carefully stepping out with me wrapped around him.

I try to let go and slide down his body. I know this was Fin’s idea, but coming out wrapped around her boyfriend might not be something she’s prepared to see.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Chace tightens his hands. His grip is so possessive, and I don’t even care he’s possibly bruising my tender skin. Realizing he’s not letting go of me blocks my senses of what feels right, yet I know is wrong, and pushes all doubt away.

“But Fin…” I pant against his neck, not wanting to look into his eyes.

“Her idea. ‘Member?”

He walks us out of the bathroom, and chills instantly hit me, causing bumps to rise across my skin. Chace doesn’t take his eyes off me as he makes his way to the bed. The room is only lightly lit with a bedside lamp. He doesn’t drop me onto the bed. He holds onto me as he lowers us both down, him on top of me. His lips find mine instantly. I allow my legs to drift open, and he falls flawlessly between them. This time we moan in unison at the contact. The thin fabric of my bathing suit does nothing to soothe the friction his body causes against mine.

He makes magic with the straps of my top, undoing them with ease. He tosses it to the side and begins to kiss down my sensitive body. I can’t help but push my hips up into him as he makes his way down, sucking each nipple into his mouth before he moves further down. Chace rises up onto his knees and I lift my ass, giving him access to pull my bottoms down. We are so into the moment that we pay no attention to our surroundings.

Then Fin snores and it brings us back to reality. The whole reason we are in this compromising position has now passed out. I’m so close to having what I’ve always wanted and now it’s probably ruined. But Chace doesn’t stop pulling the cold fabric down my legs like I had expected. He settles back between my legs, and I can feel his hardness begging.

“I don’t want to stop.” He grips my face, kissing me with passion. “But if you want me to, I will.”

I shake my head. “No. I want this.”

“Good.” I can feel him smile against my lips. He lets go of my face and grabs my hands, interlocking our fingers as he holds our arms over my head. He watches me intently as he begins to rotate his hips, slowly working his way in. Very slowly, thankfully.

“You’re so fucking tight,” he moans as he continues to inch his way inside. I want to tell him why, but I don’t want to chance him stopping. I want his lips to stay against mine the entire time to keep my mind off the slight pain I’m beginning to feel, but he’s too caught up in the moment; in the feeling.

I bite my lip and close my eyes as he finally pushes completely inside me. He stills and I can feel his eyes burning into me.

“Look at me, Q,” he whispers. I turn my head away in shame. “Look at me,” he pleads and releases my hands, using a free hand to turn my face to his. I finally open my eyes and look up at him. “Am I your first?” His tone is a mixture of shock and pride.

I just nod.

“Then I’ll be gentle,” he says, leaning down and kissing me slowly.

Top of the 5
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Chace

What. The. Fuck.

I groan and roll over.

What in the literal fuck did I do?

Petrified of what I’m about to see, I tentatively open one of my eyes.  Peeking out of the corner, I look at the pillow next to me.  Finley’s sprawled out on her back, just the way we’d left her last night.  I feel a little wobbly as I open my other eye and use my arms to push myself up off the mattress.  I look on the floor of the room, but all I see is a bunch of clothes thrown carelessly around. 

The room starts spinning and I move my arms to the side, causing me to fall straight down onto my chest again.  The bed shakes and Finley stirs next to me.  Oh fuck!  My stomach turns over on itself, but I’m not sure if it’s a result of the massive hangover or the guilt.  Finley sighs and turns away from me over on to her side.  I look at her naked back and wish that I had been using my head last night.  Maybe that was the problem.  I had been.

Worried about Quinn and her mental state, I decide it’s time for me to get up.  I need to set all this straight.  Last night was crazy and it needs to be fixed before it ruins everything.  I move slowly, pushing myself away from Finley and off the bed.  I’m careful to not cause too much movement, because I don’t want to wake her.  I’ve got to find Quinn first.  We need to talk this thing through.

Standing up proves to be trickier than I anticipated, and I wobble a bit.  It’s then that I realize I’m still a little drunk.  I chuckle.  My hand flies to my mouth.  There’s nothing funny about this. Nothing at all. I look over my shoulder, checking that Finley is still sound asleep. I breathe a sigh of relief to see that she is still oblivious to the chaos around her. Just as she had been last night.

I lightly tip toe towards the door and pray that it’s recently been oiled as I pull it open. It doesn’t make a sound, and I step out into the eerily quiet hallway before closing it behind me. I look around, hoping for some sort of indication of where Quinn could be, but instead I’m hit with an onslaught of memories from last night.

“Look at me, Q,” I whispered. She turned her head away from me. “Look at me,” I pleaded and released her hands, using my free hand to turn her face to mine. She opened her eyes and looked up at me. “Am I your first?” I asked, absolutely stunned.

Without a word, she just nodded.

“Then I’ll be gentle,” I promised before leaning down and kissing her.

I shake my head clear.  I have taken my best friend’s V-Card.  Even worse, my girlfriend’s best friend’s V-Card.  What a scumbag.  I was officially Greg.  Running my hands along the back of my neck, I venture down the hallway, peeking into empty bedrooms along the way.  Nada.  No sign of Quinn.

Maybe she called her parents and went home. She was notorious for doing that. When shit got real, Quinn preferred to escape. I pull out my cell phone, ready to call her vanishing ass when I hear something coming from the kitchen. Chances are it isn’t a raccoon, or at least I hope it’s not, so I walk as fast as my feet will take me. I don’t know how long we have before Finley wakes up, and I need to make sure that Quinn is okay. That she’s not freaking out like me. Because I am. Totally fucking freaking out.

Standing in the doorway, I watch as she grabs and pours some cereal into the bowl she has placed on the island. I clear my throat in attempt to gain her attention.  She looks up, her eyes meet mine, and her face flushes red. Fuck. Shit has gotten weird already. Act cool. “Morning, Q,” I say nonchalantly as I stalk across the cold kitchen floor to the cabinets. My back is to her, but I hear the cereal hit the bowl as she continues to pour. Reaching up, I open a cupboard and grab myself a bowl before turning around and preparing myself a morning snack. Quinn takes her bowl and sits at the kitchen table that’s placed in front of the bay window overlooking the lake. Once mine is full I join her. Time seems to drag on, and she doesn’t say anything. My stomach is in such turmoil that I can’t eat, and I just push my cereal around with my spoon.

I take a deep breath and just go for it. “Q, listen, about last night—”

“You don’t have to say anything,” she cuts in without ever breaking her gaze from her bowl.

“I do. We need to talk about this.”

“No, really. We don’t.” Her voice is dry and to the point. She’s pissed.

“Listen, what happened, happened.  I’m not sorry.  But Finley can’t know.”

“I realize that, Chace.”

I reach across the table and take her hand, and her eyes immediately shoot up and meet mine. “I can’t lose you.”

She smiles, but it’s not one of her genuine ones. It’s fake and forced. “You’re not.”

“Not what?”

I pull my hand away like I’ve just been caught stealing cookies from the cookie jar and look over my shoulder at Finley entering the kitchen.

“I was just telling Chace here that he’s not very funny.” Giving me a sideways glance, she continues on. “He should leave the jokes to me.”

Finley laughs and stands behind me, wrapping her arms around my neck.  “Yeah, Quinn is way funnier than you. Sorry, babe.” She leans down to kiss my earlobe and I watch as Quinn flinches and looks out the window. 

It doesn’t last long, and she stands up quickly, pushing the chair back so that it scratches against the floor. “I gotta go.”

Finley sits down in the chair next to me. “Go?  Go where?” she asks, slightly annoyed. We’re all supposed to spend the morning together before I go home and pack to leave. This is it for our summer together.  

“Yeah, I got this family thing.  Can I borrow your car, Fin?”

Shit. Quinn doesn’t ever have family things.

“Yeah, sure.”  Finley digs through her purse and tosses her keys to Quinn who snatches them mid-air.

“Will I see you later?” I don’t embellish, because she knows what’s going on later.  I’m leaving. 

She shrugs and purses her lips together. “Yeah,” she sighs. “I’ll do my best to make it over before you leave.”

No one says anything else, and I watch in disbelief as she walks away, just as though nothing is different. As if last night didn’t happen. And for an instant I’m jealous as hell. Because Quinn has just pulled off what I wish I could. I want to be obliviously unaffected. Finley wraps her arms around my neck and pulls herself into my lap. She leans against my chest and kisses my cheek. “I’ve got swiss cheese memory.”

I let out the air I’ve been holding in. “I think we all drank a little too much.”

“Chace…” Finley starts.

My heart pounds against my chest. She knows. “Please tell me we all didn’t end up in the shower together.”

I place my hands on her wrist, pulling her arms from my neck. I’ve got to tell her something. Shifting in my seat, I wrap my fingers around hers and look her in the eyes.  “Do you want the truth?”

She nods.

“Yeah, the three of us ended up in the shower together.”

“Ugh,” she groans, her face flushing with embarrassment. I decide that that’s where her memory should end. 

“But that’s it. You passed out and we all went to bed.” Finley doesn’t need to know that she invited me to have sex with our best friend. She doesn’t need to know that she opened a door that’ll never be shut again. She doesn’t need to know that she changed everything; that things will never be the same. We’ll never just be three friends again. We can’t. It’s impossible. 

***

I walk through the door and drop my duffel bag. “Ma!”

“In your bedroom!” her voice echoes from the back of the house. Of course she is. She’s busy taking care of me, packing me up while I’m out making a goddamn mess of my life.

Walking down the hallway, I stop and lean against the doorframe of my room. I watch on as she zips up my suitcase and notice my bat bag all packed lying next to it.  “Did you remember to pack the Icy Hot?” I ask.

She turns to me and smiles. “Of course I did. I’ve been packing your bat bag since you were five.”

I see a hint of tears in her eyes as she turns back towards my bed and picks up some of my already folded clothes and refolds them. Without a doubt I know that she’s having a hard time knowing I’m leaving today. It must be hard knowing that the only person you unconditionally love is getting ready to leave and go far away by themselves. I can’t blame her; it’s been just the two of us for as long as I can remember. Hell, I know I’m going to miss her. 

I take a few steps and wrap my arms around her neck.  Leaning down, I press my cheek to the top of her head. I’ve been taller than her since I was fourteen and this was the thing I loved most about it. Being able to rest my head on hers. “I’m gonna miss you too, Ma.”

She sniffles before turning around in my arms and wrapping me up in a hug. The same hug that mended all of my scraped knees. The one she gave when I made the All-Star team and honor roll. It was her hug I depended on most, and little did she know how much I need it in this moment. She leans back and looks up at me through her tears and says, “I’m so proud of you, Chace.”

My stomach bottoms out with guilt. If she only knew the mess I’m leaving behind.

We break our embrace and she wipes the tears from under her eyes. “Well, that is certainly enough emotion for today.” She smiles. “So what time are the girls coming over to see you off?”

My eyes break away from hers, because I’m afraid that by looking at her that she’ll know. It’s stupid really, but the guilt is chewing me up. “Finley will be over around lunchtime.”

“And Quinn?”

“Quinn said she had a family thing.” 

Hoping to gauge her reaction, I look at Ma from the corner of my eye and watch as she raises her eyebrows. “Quinn?  Doing a family thing? On the day you’re leaving?”

I look away from her and put my hand behind my neck. My hand squeezes the muscles hoping to relieve some of the tension that has made its home there since waking up this morning. “Yeah.” My eyes find my corkboard next to my bed and I study the pictures that are pinned all over it. Finley usually adds all of them on there, filling the space with pictures of her and Quinn and the three of us together. But pinned in the center is the only picture I ever put up there. It’s just Quinn and I when we were only nine or ten. Ma had taken it after a little league game and I was in my baseball uniform. We’re standing with our arms draped over each other’s shoulders and Quinn’s holding up a sign that she had made that day. It said, ‘My bestie just struck yours out’. Even back then she had been witty.

Ma reaches out and rubs my forearm and I look back to her. “She’ll be here, Chace. There’s no way Quinn will miss saying good luck to you.”

I hope she’s right, because I need to see her. I need to see that she’s alright. I want to believe that we’re okay and that I haven’t ruined the relationship we’ve had for the last ten years.