Catholic Guilt and the Joy of Hating Men (11 page)

“We forgot,” one of the gunmen said.

“Dammit, Davis...”

“Well you weren’t there.”

She seemed surprised by the sharpness of his response.

“I’m... I’m sorry,” he said. “I really am.”

“Just open a cell,” she said.

He did as she asked, holding the door open.

“Come on, girls,” Kathleen said. “Time’s a wastin.”

We walked inside.

Davis closed the door.

There was nothing we could do but wait.

After about fifteen minutes, the door to the cell opened.

We all stepped back.

Arty appeared in the doorway.

“Don’t worry,” he said in a whisper. “I’ll get you girls out.”

He pulled out a small pocket knife and started cutting my cuffs.

“Sorry about poking you with a cattle prod,” I said.

“I’m over it. Actually, no... if we get out of here I’m probably going to want to poke you back.”

I smiled. “I don’t think you meant that the way it sounded.”

“We’ll see,” he said.

Once the cuffs were all cut, he picked Julia up and threw her over his shoulder.

“They’re still looking for Pouchon,” he said. “They can’t find his body and they’re worried.”

“Why are they worried?” I asked.

“They think he’s like her. That the
macoutes
can’t hurt him.”

“Like they had a chance to kill him and they didn’t?”

“Yeah, but I think there’s more to it.”

He led us out of the building and out to the parking lot.

“We’ll just have to keep walking,” he said. “Unless one of you girls knows how to hotwire a truck.”

“They’ll catch up to us,” I said.

“We’ll split up... head into the woods.”

“Bad idea,” Cadance said. “There are still two missing zombies out there.”

“There are dozens of zombies back there,” I said. “I’ll take the two.”

“We should stick together,” Julia said from her perch. “Strength in numbers.”

“I doubt that’ll help,” Cadance said.

“It can’t hurt,” I said.

We went into the forest, moving into single file through the beech and yellow birch. Sunrise was starting, which made finding our way a little easier.

Cadance was in front while Arty and Julia brought up the rear.

It was quiet, aside from some bird or other, and it didn’t feel like the kind of place you’d find a
macoute
lying in wait. It seemed like the kind of place you’d go on romantic walks with that guy you were sorta into, hoping he’d make up some lame excuse to brush up against your ass or something.

I heard something crashing through the trees in front of us.

Cadance veered to her left and started running.

I stopped and motioned for everyone else to do the same.

I saw the figures ahead of us. Two men moving quickly, their footsteps crunching on the undergrowth, moving after Cadance.

They seemed too quick to be zombies.

Cadance tripped.

“Leave her,” sayra said to me. “She’s not worth it.”

The footsteps stopped. I couldn’t see the men. I didn’t know why they weren’t moving.

I heard Julia scream.

I turned around.

Two more men were behind us. They’d pulled Arty down, and Julia had gone down with him. Arty was kicking and punching one of the men, but he was losing. I couldn’t see Julia.

I reached down and grabbed the biggest stick I could find. I wasn’t sure what I was doing.

I ran toward them.

I shoved it at the nearest of the two men, aiming for his chest. It struck him and cracked. He punched me in the neck and I fell into the needles of an evergreen, slamming my head against the trunk.

Julia started screaming.

“
Rete trankil!
” a voice called out.

The screaming stopped.

I found my way out of the pine tree, pulling needles out of my hands. They’d impaled me with such force that my skin was broken and bleeding in places.

The two men were still, standing over Arty and Julia.

Behind them was Pouchon. His face was torn and bloody, but it seemed like he hadn’t noticed.

“
Pati
,” Pouchon said.

The two men walked into the trees and soon they were gone.

“What the hell?” I said.

“The escaped zombies,” Pouchon said. “Hopefully they’ll leave you alone now.”

I knelt down beside Julia.

“I don’t think I can walk,” she said. “But that’s nothing new. Oh... but the broken ribs are.”

“I think Arty’s dead,” Cadance said. She was standing over him, not close enough to help or anything.

“Nice of you to come back,” I said.

“I thought we were all going to run. Sorry.”

Sayra came over and knelt alongside me. She gently put her finger to Arty’s wrist.

She didn’t say anything.

“Of course he’s dead,” Pouchon said. “The
macoutes
attacked him first because he was the biggest threat.”

“Smart
macoutes
,” I said.

“Not your grandpappy’s zombies.”

“We need to get out of here,” Cadance said.

“We can’t move her,” I said.

“We’ll need to split up,” Pouchon said.

“How are you part of the ‘we’ on this?” I asked. “Don’t you remember wanting to eat me?”

“Oh, so you’ve got a choice all of the sudden? Unless you have the power to control the
macoutes
, you’re pretty much stuck with me.”

“You’re more dangerous than the
macoutes
,” Cadance said.

“I’m not a killing machine,” Pouchon said. “People change. And I’m more than willing to come to an understanding.”

“Not interested,” I said.

“Why not?”

“Because we can’t trust you.”

“Fine. I’ll call my friends back over here for breakfast.” He cupped his hand over his bloody mouth. “
Vini macoutes mwen
,” he called. “
Vini
.”

I couldn’t see them yet, but I heard their footsteps.

“What do you want us to do?” I asked.

“Just you,” Pouchon said. “I need you to go back with me.”

“Why?”

“The money.”

“Are you serious?” I asked. “You want to walk back to a place where there are two guys with assault weapons and a woman who apparently won’t die... and all for a little bit of walking around money?”

“That money cannot be left behind for Kathleen Shannard,” he said. “And I do what I’m told.”

“By who?”

“By whom, you mean. By my master, Amanda. By
our
master.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“You’re a zombie, Amanda... a
bokor macoute
, a sorcerer in service... just like me.”

“I’m pretty sure I’d know if I was a zombie.”

He grinned. “That’s the best part. You don’t know. I didn’t know either until I got the call.” He looked over to Cadance. “That was thanks to you.”

“I guess eating people’s made you a wee bit insane,” I said.

“I need to take your ear.”

“What?”

“
Mwen santi Bondye vire do ban mwen
.” He grabbed me by the neck. “
Tout bagay pa la pou lontan
.”

“Please...” I said. I jabbed him in the eye.

He didn’t seem to notice.

“
Tout koumansman genyen yon fen
.”

He bit down on the lobe.

I screamed. I felt like I would pass out from the pain, but I didn’t. I was there. I was feeling it.

And Pouchon was in no hurry. “
Nou renmen ou
,” he said. “
Ou va pou tout tan nan bra Papa selès la
.”

And then it was off.

He held the ear up for me to see. It didn’t look like something that had been a part of me; it looked cold and shriveled.

“
Piga ou vire do ban mwen lè m'ap rele nan pye ou
.”

I wasn’t going to be able to wear my hair up anymore.

“You’re invincible now,” Pouchon said. “She cannot hurt you.”

“Can you hurt me?” I asked.

“No one can. Other than our master.”

“And who the hell is that?”

“We need to go.”

“What about my friends?” I said. “And Cadance?”

“They’ll be safe,” he replied.

“Those two zombies will attack them the moment we are gone.”

“Those zombies are coming with us. Call them.”

“I don’t speak voodoo,” I said.

“You know the words...”

He was right; I did.

“
Vini
,” I said. I started to walk back to the stables.

The two
macoutes
followed behind me, as did Pouchon.

And somehow that didn’t surprise me.

We stepped out of the woods and into the parking lot.

Kathleen saw us. She was standing with Gary. The two gunmen weren’t there.

“You’ve returned, Pouchon,” she said. “You killed my men and you almost killed poor Gary here. I’m not about to forgive you for that.”

“I brought someone,” he said.

“I know. Another
bokor macoute
. How exciting for us all.”

“Yeah, I’m Amanda,” I said. “We’ve met like a couple of times now.”

“I know who you are. I’ve known about you for a very long time. Why do you think I had them bring you here?”

“The cinnamon challenge?”

“Marinette can’t stop me,” she said, “no matter how many fat American whores she fills with the rotten seed of her sons.”

“This is starting to sound pretty personal.”

“Who is your father, Amanda Hackensack? Why don’t you carry his name?”

“It was a crazy time,” I said. “Somalia, Tonya Harding, the last few seasons of Full House had really jumped the shark... there were a lot of bastards born back then.”

“Your father was a
loa
... a spirit.”

“I know what a
loa
is... um... apparently...”

“That’s what makes you a
bokor macoute
. Marinette asks for your left ear and in return she gives you power over your brothers in bondage.”

“My brothers?”

“She means the other
macoutes
,” Pouchon said.

“So what’s stopping me from ordering every zombie in a mile radius from ripping you to pieces?” I asked her.

“What’s stopping me from doing the same to you?” she replied.

“So it’s a Mexican standoff.”

“A
vodou
standoff,” Pouchon said. “It happens more than you’d think.”

“My power is stronger,” she said. “I am the mount of
Kalfou
, the Master of --”

“Master of Crossroads,” I said. “I’m aware.” I wasn’t sure how, but I decided just to roll with it.

I turned to face my two
macoutes
. “
Touye
,” I said,
kill
, the one command that would allow them to kill another of their kind. Of our kind.

They ran toward Kathleen.

“
Rete trankil
,” she said.

The
macoutes
stopped.

“Was there a point to this, Pouchon?” I asked. “There’s two of us and one of her... does that give us something?”

“I’m here, too,” Gary said.

“Shut up, Gary,” Kathleen and I said at pretty much the same time.

“Yeah, there’s a plan,” Pouchon said. “Command them again.”

“
Touye
,” I said.

Pouchon launched himself at Kathleen, pushing her to the ground.

And then he started to kiss her.

She punched him in the face.

He elbowed her temple. And then he kissed her again.

And the two
macoutes
fell onto them.

Kathleen couldn’t command them to stop.

She didn’t even have a chance to scream.

After a minute or so the
macoutes
had finished feeding, and Kathleen and Pouchon were a mix of torn clothes, chewed bones and a fleshy goo.

“I didn’t think she could be killed,” Gary said. “I thought she’d outlive us all.”

“That’s why you’re nobody’s
bokor macoute
,” I said.

And then I watched the zombies eat him.