Catch a Falling Heiress: An American Heiress in London (32 page)

Guilt nudged him. “I could have done,” he admitted. “But I thought it better to wait.”

“Wait?” she echoed in disbelief. “Wait for what? Until you’d done what Daddy suggested, and we were safely hitched?”

He could see her expression hardening even more, and he shook his head in violent denial. “No, I told your father I was going to wait just until we were engaged. That way, when you did find out—”

“I’d be sufficiently softened up. After you sweet-talked me with blueberry muffins, and talk of truces and friendship. After you’d aroused me with your kisses and seduced me with your torrid words. After I fell straight into your arms and gave you my heart and came to your bed like a naïve little fool. Yes, after all that, you were going to tell me. Well, you waited too long.”

“Before we leave the subject of last night, can I at least remind you that you came to me? I didn’t come to you. I tried to say at the time it would be a mistake—”

“The worst mistake I’ve ever made. And one I can assure you I don’t intend to make again.” She ducked around him and kept on walking as if the matter were settled, but it wasn’t settled, not by a long way, for as he’d already told her, he’d chase her around the entire garden until she stopped running and listened.

“Either way, it’s done, Linnet,” he reminded her, striding along beside her as she exited the rose garden and turned down a path lined with tall boxwoods that led to the cherub grotto. “As I said last night, it can’t be undone.”

“And yet, after I agreed to marry you last night, you still had every opportunity to mention the scheme you and my father had cooked up. Yet, even then, you didn’t breathe a word.”

Guilt nudged him again, harder this time. “I intended to tell you right then. I did,” he insisted at her sound of disbelief. “I started to, but then, you started kissing me . . . and I knew you were naked under that nightdress, and my wits started slipping . . . and I just . . .” He sighed and raked his hands through his hair. “I forgot.”

“You forgot?” She stopped on the path, so abruptly he’d gone two strides past her before stopping also. “What you mean,” she choked, glaring at him as he turned to face her, “is that you knew if you told me about the deal at that point, I wouldn’t bed you.”

He grimaced at this more brutal, and perhaps more accurate, version of what had been going on in his head last night.

“After all,” she went on, “if you waited until after you’d bedded me to tell me the truth, it would be so much better, wouldn’t it? Just a little insurance, you know, in case I kicked up a fuss.”

“Wait.” He stepped in front of her as she moved around him. “You think I didn’t tell you last night as a calculated move? You think I wanted to be able to force your hand if you changed your mind about marrying me once you learned what your father and I were doing? That I would use the possibility of a baby as leverage?”

“Isn’t that what you’re doing right now?” She looked up, tears in her eyes. They glinted like steel blades, driving into his heart. “As you said not five minutes ago, if there’s a baby, I’ll have to marry you or I’ll be ruined beyond amendment. If that’s not forcing my hand, what is?”

Her face puckered, she ducked around him and kept walking.

He was shocked that she could think so little of him, and for a moment, he stood there, fixed to the spot like a sundial. By the time he turned, she had reached the grotto. He followed, his long strides catching up to her as she reached the fountain.

“That is not why I didn’t tell you.” At the end of his tether, he caught her from behind, wrapping both his arms around her, pulling her back against his chest, holding tight as she struggled to free herself. “That is not why. Good God, Linnet,” he murmured against her hair, “what sort of man do you think I am?”

“That’s just it,” she cried. “I don’t know.”

“Yes, you do.” He pressed a kiss to her hair. “You do know if you would just listen to yourself.”

She froze in his hold. “Let go of me.”

He hesitated, knowing she would flee the second he released her. “Give me your word you won’t run until I’ve had my say, and I’ll let go.”

She writhed in his hold. “I don’t want to hear any more of what you have to say.”

“Very well, then,” he said, holding her fast, “I’ll just stand here while you exhaust yourself.”

“Using brute force, as usual, I see.” She struggled in vain for a bit longer, then stopped, panting. “All right, all right. I give you my word, I won’t run.”

Linnet might be strong-willed, stubborn, and angry as hell with him right now, but she’d given her word, and he chose to accept it. Trust had to work both ways. Besides, he could outrun her any day of the week. He released her.

She turned, facing him. “You ask what sort of man I think you are. My question is: How can I know, given the secrets you keep? You won’t explain the true reason you interfered in my life in the first place and why you did what you did to ruin Van Hausen—”

“And as I already told you, I cannot explain my reasons for that. I am honor-bound to keep silent.”

“You said we’re friends. Do friends keep secrets?”

“Sometimes, yes, they do. If you told me a secret, I would take it to my grave. I would never tell anyone.”

“Nonetheless, I have to wonder just how many people’s secrets you’re keeping, Jack. One I could accept, perhaps, but how many more are there, lurking in the shadows?”

“There aren’t any others.”

“That’s what you
say.
But how can I be sure?”

“You will have to trust me.”

She stared at him as if he was deranged, a look he’d become quite familiar with during the past month. “You’ve just admitted you lied to me, manipulated me, and kept more than one secret from me. You’ve demonstrated yet again that I have no reason whatsoever to trust you, and yet you expect me to do so anyway? Why on earth would I ever give you my trust again?”

“Because I love you,” he said simply. “I realized it the other day when I said it to you, but I think I’ve really loved you from the moment I kissed you. And you love me. And we are getting married. I didn’t bed you to force your hand, but I also refuse to allow any child of ours to be born a bastard.”

“We don’t know if there will be a baby,” she whispered.

“And we can’t wait long enough to find out. You and I will be married, Linnet Holland. Even,” he added over her attempt to interrupt, “if I have to carry you to the altar.”

“An act that would be perfectly in keeping with your uncivilized character.”

“Be that as it may, we will marry. And you’ll be my countess, and you’ll take charge of the estates, while—”

“I will?” That took her back, and she eyed him askance. “You’d hand the running of the estates over to me?”

“Well, someone has to run them, and it shan’t be me. I shall have my hands full with the African investments company. Yes, I’m still doing it,” he went on before she could even open her mouth to object, “and yes, your father is staking my share as my personal settlement for the dowry, and no, I’m not backing out of the deal, even if you don’t like that I’m in partnership with your father.”

“But you never asked me why I don’t like it.”

“I haven’t asked because it’s obvious. You hate his interference in your life.”

But she was shaking her head before he’d even finished. “That’s not why. You don’t know what you are getting into, Jack, when you make deals with my father. He’s using you to make a profit.”

“So what? I’m doing the same to him. Do you have something against profits? I thought Americans were all about earning one’s way.”

“He’s buying you, Jack. He’s making it so that you owe him, that you feel obligated to him. He’s manipulating you.”

“No, he’s not.”

“Yes, he is, and you don’t even see it. I know my father, I know what he’s like.”

“My darling Linnet, do you think I don’t know what sort of man your father is? I grew up with two of the most manipulative men in England. Compared to my father and brother, your father is child’s play.” He studied her baffled face for a moment, then sighed. “I can see I shall have to elucidate matters further. The agreement your father and I made was to share out thirds.”

“And because of that, you think you’re going into this evenly, with a fair deal on the table, but—”

“On the contrary, it won’t be fair at all. I stipulated that the percentages be thirty-three percent to me, thirty-three to him, and thirty-four to Stuart. Your father agreed, because without Stuart’s knowledge of Africa and his connections there, we wouldn’t have a prayer of making sound investments. In other words, Stuart has the controlling interest.”

“Jack, I know you trust your friend, but—”

“Will you let me finish? Honestly, Linnet, you ask me for explanations, and when I try to give them, you immediately start interrupting.”

She bit her lip. “Go on.”

“I cabled Stuart and asked if he was willing to do this, and he agreed, and we decided to work out the details when he arrived, which was about two hours ago. While you, my love, were sulking in your room—”

“I was not sulking.”

“Sulking,” he went on firmly, “and cursing my name and wishing my soul to perdition, I have no doubt—while you were doing all that, Stuart and I have been making our plans. When your father arrives to negotiate the final deal, he’ll find that Stuart is demanding a change in the terms. He will insist that I have thirty-four percent and he thirty-three. He won’t do the deal otherwise.”

“Daddy will never agree to let his son-in-law be in charge.”

“Yes, he will, because if he balks, Stuart won’t do it. Your father isn’t going to let you be ruined, so he won’t risk antagonizing me. And he won’t want to antagonize Stuart, either, for that might queer the deal altogether. He might try to bluff, but I’ll call him on it.”

“So you and my father are going to play metaphorical poker with my reputation and my future?”

“No, we’re playing poker over the dowry. Your reputation is already saved, my darling, and your future is set. Because you are going to marry me. And, besides,” he added before she could point out that she hadn’t accepted him yet, “there’s no risk from our side. Your father may be a manipulative bastard, but he’s panting, absolutely panting, for connections into Africa. He has been for years. I know that because your mother told me so. He won’t balk. He’ll agree to the terms, I will have the controlling interest, and Stuart will back anything I want to do with his share. You father won’t control anything. The bylaws will be written so that his one-third share allows him no say in how the company is run or where we invest the funds. He’ll have no power over me at all. So you see? Your father isn’t moving me around like a chess piece. I’m moving him. He won’t like it, mind you, but he’ll do it.”

“But why not just insist on a personal settlement? Why go into partnership with him at all?”

“Because there’s a great deal your father can teach me about business and investing. Between him and Stuart, I shall learn a great deal. I don’t want him to just give me money for marrying you. This is a chance to earn my way, to have some useful knowledge, to have a purpose in the world. I can build something, make something of my life, and this deal with your father gives me the chance to do all that. When he offered it, I jumped at it. Of course I did.”

He put his hands on her arms. “All my life, I’ve had nothing, Linnet. I’ve been nothing. I was always the second son, the afterthought. When I told you the other day about the sort of father I wouldn’t be, I think you got a pretty fair idea of what my father was like and what my childhood was like. I’d given up hope of ever having anything of my own before I was ten years old. When my brother died, and I became the earl, I inherited the estates, yes, but it was still worth nothing because between them, he and my father managed to mortgage everything we had.”

“I hope it’s all right with you if I stop you long enough to say I think your father was a horrid man, and your brother was every bit as bad.”

“I completely agree with your assessment of my family, but please believe that I am not like them. If you believe nothing else I say, for God’s sake, believe that.”

“I do believe that. But you’ve got a long way to go, Jack Featherstone, before you’ll convince me why I should marry you.”

“I’m glad you’ve decided to stop running long enough to give me the chance to try.”

She gave him that deceptively sweet smile of hers. “I believe in giving a man plenty of rope. Carry on.”

He took a breath, taking a moment to gather his thoughts, knowing this was the most important speech he’d ever make. “When we met, you thought I was a fortune hunter, and you’ve no idea how ironic that is. Before I was twenty years old, I had resigned myself to the idea I’d never marry because I didn’t think I’d ever have the means to support a wife and a family, and I’d always been adamant that the one thing I’d never do was marry for money. And then you walked into that ballroom. I looked at you, and I thought you had the most beautiful eyes I’d ever seen in my life. And then, later, when we were standing there in the pagoda, and your mother and Mrs. Dewey were coming, I just . . .”

He paused, lifted his hands, and let them fall. “I just lost my head. All I’d intended to do was stop Van Hausen. I didn’t go to the pagoda with any devious plan to propose to you myself, or kiss you, or ruin you, but I’ve never been the sort of man who plans things out. I’m very much a man of impulses. You’ll just have to accept that about me when you marry me, by the way, because it isn’t going to change.”

She sniffed, and he didn’t know if she was the least bit impressed by his little speech. “Yes, I believe I said you were like a roller coaster.”

He grinned. “Which means your life will never be dull.”

She tilted her head, looking at him, and he fancied he might not have to carry her up the aisle after all. “You’re never going to tell me about the Van Hausen business, are you?”

“No.”

She bit her lip, considering. “But you’re willing to hand over the running of your estates to me?”

“Yes.” He took her hands in his, and this time, she let him. “As I said, I shall be quite busy with duties of my own. Besides, I trust you. And since it’s your dowry that’s saving the estates anyway, it’s only right you be in charge of them.”