Cat Country (18 page)

‘And the women themselves? Do you mean to tell me that they accept
that
as their only function?’ I asked.

‘You tell him Revery, you’re a woman,’ said Young Scorpion.

‘Me? I love you, so there is nothing that I can say. If you want to go home to see that broodmare wife of yours, go ahead; I don’t care. But if you ever stop loving me, I’ll eat forty reverie leaves at once and then Revery will be reveried to death.’

I waited for her to go on, but she said nothing more.

SCHOOL DAYS

I
DIDN
’
T
ask Young Scorpion directly, nor did he invite me, but somehow or other I ended up staying with him and Revery. I began my observation work the very next day. I had no definite plans as to what to examine first. It seemed to me that the best plan was simply to go out and investigate whatever I happened to bump into.

While I had been on the front side of the street, I had not seen many children. Now I discovered this was because they were all here on the back side of the single line of buildings. This made me feel very good, for it indicated to me that the Cat People did have one thing going for them at least: they hadn’t forgotten to educate their children. Since all the cultural organisations were on this side of the street, I knew that the children must have come over to go to school.

The children of the Cat People were the happiest one could imagine. They were dirty; in fact, they were absolutely filthy, filthy past all possible description. They were thin, foul-smelling and ugly. Some had noses missing; others had eyes gone; and the heads of still others were covered with boils and scabs. And yet . . . they all seemed extremely happy! I saw one whose face was so bloated that it looked like a balloon, his mouth was so swollen he couldn’t open it, and there were bloodstains all over the lower part of his face. Despite all that, even he was smiling and playing merrily with the other children. The hopeful feeling that I had just entertained for the children of Cat Country suddenly vanished.

It seemed impossible to conceive of these children as coming from good homes or going to good schools. But they
were
happy, weren’t they? Only in a country where homes, schools, society and the government are composed of muddleheaded idiots can such muddle-headed ‘happy’ children be produced. Only in such a country can one find children who are filthy, thin, foul smelling, ugly, deformed – and yet happy! These children were an index of the society and the state. They were a proper cross for their parents to bear. For it was most unlikely that when they became adults they would make Cat Country not-dirty, not-thin, not-foul, or not-ugly. Once more I saw the giant thumb of oblivion poised to crush the hopes of the Cat People. They had absolutely no future. Practising polygamy, free love, and only caring about
that
, not one of them paid any attention to the future of their race. Facing imminent oblivion and all they cared about was their short-term happiness and convenience. Such devils hardly deserved to live!

And yet, what did I mean by judging them so hastily? I decided that it would only be fair to see what their schools were like before damning them out of hand. I followed a group of children to a school consisting of a large main gate and four walls that enclosed a patch of empty ground. As the children entered, I stood outside and peeked in. Some of them were rolled up into a wrestling mass of flesh in one corner of the yard; some were climbing the walls; others were making drawings on the walls; while in one corner some were carefully examining each other’s private parts. They were all very gay, for the teachers hadn’t arrived yet. After I had waited for I don’t know how long, three adults came in. They were all skeletally thin as though none of them had eaten a single good meal since birth. They used the wall to support themselves as they came slowly shuffling along. Whenever there was a slight breeze, they would come to a dead stop and tremble a bit before going on. Still leaning against the wall for support, they slowly passed through the school gate. The children continued rolling, climbing, making noise and examining each other’s privates. The three men sat on the ground, panting with wide-open mouths. When the students got even noisier, the trio simply closed their eyes and plugged up their ears. It almost seemed as though they were actually afraid of offending the students. I was beginning to lose track of time when the three men stood up and began exhorting the students to take their places, something the children had apparently decided they would never do, for after at least an hour of exhortation, they still hadn’t budged.

Fortunately, at this juncture the three teachers (for I had decided by now that they definitely must be teachers) caught sight of me. ‘There’s a foreigner outside the gate.’ That’s all they said, but immediately every student faced the wall and sat down. It was apparent that not one of them dared to look a foreigner in the face.

I decided that the middle of the three men must be the head of the school. He announced, ‘First we shall sing the National Anthem.’ However, no one sang. They merely went blank for a while. Then he said, ‘Next let us offer up a silent prayer to the Great Spirit.’ At this point it seemed the students had already forgotten that there was a foreigner outside, as they began to push, yell and swear at each other again. ‘There’s a foreigner outside!’ the teacher reminded them, and they all quieted down again. ‘And now an address by our esteemed chancellor.’ One of the trio took a step forward and addressed the backs of the students’ heads.

‘Today you are all graduating from the university. What a grand and glorious thing!’ I almost passed out from the shock. This bunch of – university graduates? But I decided that it wouldn’t do to let my emotions run away with me and calmed myself in order to listen to the rest of the chancellor’s speech. ‘What a grand and glorious thing it is that you have all graduated from this, the highest academic institution. Having graduated from this school, you understand everything and are in possession of all knowledge. In the future, the responsibility for all of our national affairs will be upon your shoulders. What a grand and glorious thing!’ The chancellor then let out a long and musical yawn and concluded with, ‘That’s all.’ The two teachers clapped for all they were worth and the students started raising hell again.

‘There’s a foreigner outside,’said the chancellor, and they quieted down again. ‘And now an address by an honoured colleague.’ The chancellor hadn’t said which one, and hence the two teachers outdid each other in polite yielding of the honour. They went on like that for quite a while, and then finally one of them, whose face was as thin as a dried-out squash, took a step forward. I could tell that this gentleman was a pessimist because two large tears clung precariously to the corners of his eyes. In the most melancholy tones imaginable he began.

‘Today you are all graduating from this, the highest of all academic institutions. What a grand and glorious thing!’ One of the clinging tears let go. ‘All of the schools in our nation are the highest types of academic institution. What a grand and glorious thing!’ The other tear let go. ‘I hope that after graduation you will all remember what the head of our school and I have done for you. What an honour and privilege it has been for us to have the opportunity to serve as your faculty. However, before you set out into the great world, there’s a bit of personal business that I must share with you. My wife died of starvation yesterday, and what a grand and . . .’ He couldn’t go on, for now he was producing tears like rain. Only after a monumental struggle was he able to regain control of himself so that he could continue. ‘Please don’t forget your faculty after you go out into the world. If you make money, then help with money; if you obtain a large stock of reverie leaves, then help with reverie leaves. You are aware no doubt that we have not been paid for twenty-five years. You . . .’ He lacked the strength to finish; his body went somewhat awry and he slipped down to a sitting position.

‘Present the diplomas!’

The chancellor moved some thin stone slabs from the base of the wall and arranged them in front of his feet. I couldn’t see them too clearly, but they must have been engraved. ‘Everyone at this graduation is first in his class. What a grand and glorious accomplishment! The diplomas are all here and since every one of you is first in his class, you can simply come up and get them in any old order you please. Assembly dismissed!’

The chancellor and the other teacher helped the pessimist to his feet. With slow steps all three left. None of the students bothered to come forward for their diplomas. They simply resumed climbing the walls, rolling on the ground and raising hell in general. ‘What kind of circus is this?’ I thought to myself. I was totally baffled. I decided to go back and ask Young Scorpion about it.

Young Scorpion and Revery were both out. The only thing I could do was to go back out and continue my observations; then after I had made a general survey I’d go back and ask Young Scorpion to explain the details.

Set off a little to the side of the school that I had just visited was another school. The students all appeared to be about fifteen or sixteen. Seven or eight of them had someone pinned to the ground and seemed to be hacking away at him with knives. To one side of this group was another knot of students who were busily tying up two people. I thought that perhaps this was a laboratory class in physiology in which the students were practising dissection. And yet, tying up living men did seem to be going a bit too far, even if it were in the interest of science. I hardened my heart and forced myself to watch. I was determined to see it through until the end so that I would find out what was going on here after all. When they had the two men tied up, they tossed them down by the foot of the wall; neither made a sound. They were probably already scared unconscious. The ones who were practising dissection went on cutting and yelling.

‘Let’s see if you can still tell us what to do now, you dead beast! Let me tear off an arm here!’

‘Make
me
study, will you? Forbid me from horsing around with the girls, will you? With our whole society as black as it is, you’ve still got the nerve to tell
me
to study. Now, you won’t allow us to do
that
with the girls on school property, huh? I’ll tear out your heart, you dead beast!’A chunk of bright red came flying through the air.

‘Have you got those two rotten beasts tied up yet? Carry one of them over here!’

‘Shall we bring the principal or the history teacher?’

‘The principal!’

So it was their principal and a history teacher that they were dissecting! My heart was about to leap out of my mouth! Perhaps the principal and teacher did deserve death, but I just couldn’t stand idly by and watch the students butcher two people alive. I no longer cared who was right and who was wrong in all of this. Just from the point of view of humanity alone I couldn’t stand by and watch the students – or anyone else for that matter – commit murder on a whim. I pulled out my pistol. Actually, they would have all run away had I just yelled, but I was furious and felt that only a pistol could do justice to such a pack of little beasts. Of course, they really weren’t worth wasting a bullet on, but I was beside myself.

I fired once and immediately occasioned a great crash. The concussion collapsed the walls. I had goofed again. I should have known that in Cat City, walls can not stand any sort of shock after a heavy rain. I had wanted to save the principal and had only succeeded in crushing him along with his students under the walls. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t simply throw up my hands and run away, for even the would-be assassins were still fellow creatures and therefore deserving of my help. But how could I save them?

I noticed that, fortunately, this wall was made entirely of dirt. It occurred to me that I had been too self-abasing in condemning myself for the principal’s death, for this principal was probably a man who was looking to be killed. Judging from the way the school was put together, one would guess that he had misappropriated the building funds. Perhaps that’s why the students had wanted to kill him. Although I went on conjecturing to myself like this, I didn’t allow my hands or feet to rest for a minute; I went on pulling and tearing at the rubble and before long I had succeeded in hauling a few people out. As fast as I got one out, he’d run away like a madman without so much as even looking at me. They were like carrier pigeons released from their cages. Now I began to feel relieved. I even began to feel that this trick had been fun. Last of all, I pulled out the principal and teacher. They, at least, couldn’t scamper away, for their hands and feet were still tied. I set them aside for the moment and started kicking every part of the rubble to see if there was anyone left. There probably wasn’t, but I went over it again to make sure. Having satisfied myself that I had got everybody, I came back and loosened the ropes around the mud pies whom I had just rescued.

After what seemed like ages, the two men opened their eyes. I didn’t have any drug for such an emergency, nor did I have anything alcoholic with which I might bring them around, so I had to sit back and wait for them to recover by themselves. Although I was dying to put a number of questions to them, I didn’t have the heart to start interrogating them right away. The two men sat up slowly and I saw there was still a look of terror in their eyes. I smiled reassuringly and asked, ‘Which one of you is the principal?’

A look of utter panic appeared on their faces and they began pointing at each other. I thought that perhaps they were still in a state of shock. Then slowly, stealthily, lightly, the two men stood up. I thought that they were going to stretch and loosen up a bit, but when they were all the way up, they nodded to each other and were off as fast as a pair of dragonflies chasing each other during their courtship dance. Zip! And they were out of sight. Pursuit would be useless. I was no match for a cat-man in a foot race. I sighed and sat down on the heap of rubble.

Now why had they done that? Of course! How silly of me to forget how suspicious, petty, and deceptive the Cat People could be. When I asked who the principal was, they had pointed at each other. Each, having just been snatched from the clutches of death itself, wanted to sacrifice the other in order to protect himself. They thought that I was going to do mischief to ‘The Principal,’ hence they had yielded the honour to each other, and had then escaped at the earliest available opportunity. Hah, Hah! I began laughing like a madman!