Cassie's Hope (Riders Up) (18 page)

“Even your sister?”
Cassie chuckled against his shirt.

“She’ll come
around. You can trust me on that.”

- o -

Clint appreciated
Tug’s beaming smile as he clasped Cassie’s father’s hand in greeting.

“I see you’re back,
young man. Couldn’t stay away from my daughter, huh?”

“You’re right about
that,” Clint confided, “but I also thought maybe you could use some help
protecting the filly.”

The older man led
Clint to a group of lawn chairs in the yard. Cassie and Silver Hawk were
raiding the refrigerator for pop. The day was too hot to remain inside. It
pleased Clint to see Tug getting around better. Unsteady, but better.

“So who are these
little ones, Clint?” Tug asked, after catching his breath.

Calling his
children over to them, Clint announced, “I’m proud to introduce you to my kids,
Lester and Sammy. Kids, this is Mr. O’Hanlon, Cassie’s father.”

“Just call me Tug,”
he said, reaching for the boy’s hand. “So what do you two do for fun?”

“I ride as fast as
the wind,” Lester boasted. “And I catch toads and frogs down by the creek.”

“Do you catch toads
and frogs, too?” the old man asked Sammy, helping her settle on his knee.

“No,” she warbled. “I
play with my dolls and I chase the boys…I’m fast…and I ride my pony…he’s not so
fast.” She paused and ran her finger pads across Tug’s face. “You have wrinkles
like my grandmother. But she doesn’t have whiskers.”

The old man howled.
“You’re something, little girl. I bet you can wrap Cassie right around your
finger.

“Oh, no. Fire Woman
lives too far away from me. Do you think she will want to live with me?”

Swallowing hard,
Tug smiled at the girl. “I don’t rightly know. She’ll have to decide about
that, but I can’t imagine anyone not wantin’ to live with you. And what did you
call my daughter?”

“Fire Woman. That’s
the name my grandmother gave to her. She thinks Fire Woman is a good name for
Ms. O’Hanlon, because her hair catches fire when the light shines on it.”

“Sounds like your
grandmother is a wise woman. My daughter has a lot of fire, that’s for sure.”

Becoming very
serious, Sammy responded, “I bet you’re a wise man, too. I think that’s what
wrinkles mean.”

Tug laughed again,
but before he could utter another word his young new friend hopped off his lap
and dashed toward the house. Cassie and Silver Hawk were coming down the steps
with trays of drinks and food.

“Sorry, Tug, my
kids aren’t very shy,” Clint said. “Good to see you getting some color back.”

“They’re good kids.
The girl’s observant. That’s good. And she’s already learning how to chase
boys.” Tug’s eyes filled with mirth. “She’ll turn many a head as she gets
older. You can count on that.”

“Right.”

It hardly took a
moment for both kids to refuel and then dash toward the barn to continue
exploring, after Tug had agreed to show Lester a good place near the house to
look for frogs some evening, and Sammy had gotten him to agree to spend some
time meeting the dolls she’d brought along but had left at the hotel.

“Well, Dad, what do
you think? Cassie asked. Clint and his family had just left for their hotel. The
house was suddenly very ordinary and quiet. The chatter had stopped. No more
jokes. No more questions.

Her dad had told
more stories than she thought he knew. Sammy had been able to nuzzle right into
a small corner of his chair. If the young girl was not off exploring, she was
chattering non-stop with Tug. Cassie hadn’t seen her father so freely energized
for a very long time. Laughter must truly be good for the soul.

And Lester spent a
considerable amount of time cataloging her riding trophies in his mind. He
wanted to hear the story behind each of them. Silver Hawk had remained rather
quiet, but obviously took in everything that was happening. Cassie knew Clint
was pleased. He was proud of his children, and rightly so.

But they did need a
mother.

Her father
answered. “What do I think? It was a fine meal. The day was hot, but not as
muggy as yesterday.”

“Dad! What about
Clint, Lester, Sammy, Silver Hawk? What do you think about them?”

“Oh, them.” Tug’s
lips twitched. “They’re quite a family. They can laugh together. That little
one is a real jewel. She’ll turn some fellow’s heart someday.” He paused, his
eyes twinkling. “Seriously, Cass, there’s no question they love you. And you’re
good with them. But do you love him? Is he the man you want to chase dreams
with?”

Not waiting for her
reply, he continued, “Because if you do, then tell him. It’s a lot easier
chasing dreams when you have a partner to share ups and downs.”

“Thanks,” said
Cassie, bending to kiss her father’s cheek. “There’s another person in Clint’s
family I’d like you to meet someday—his grandmother. Somehow, I think the two
of you have much in common. Both of you are romantic philosophers.”

It thrilled her to
see the gleam in her father’s eye. Being around the kids had been good for him.

Would he talk to
her now about a pain they both shared deeply? It mattered; she knew it did. How
could she even think about becoming an instant mother without ever having had
one?

She took a deep
breath and let it out slowly. “Tell me about her. Why didn’t she want to be my
mother?” Her throat constricted. She watched her father’s eyes cloud over; his
fingers automatically clenched.

“Why are you asking
after all these years?” He gasped for air.

Alarmed, Cassie
said, “I don’t want to hurt you, Dad. We don’t have to talk about her.”

“No. No, you’re
right, we’ve got to talk about her. It’s way past time. I think I understand
why, now. You’re not like her, Cass.” He sighed deeply, no doubt thinking back
to a much earlier time. “When you were little, there wasn’t much we could tell
you other than your mother wouldn’t be coming back. Your aunt thought it best
if we just ignored the past and moved on. That was easier for me, too. Looking
back, I’m not sure it was best for you.”

“You did what you
thought was best. I’m not questioning that. I just want to know more about her.
I’ve only seen one picture of her. How did you meet? What did she want out of
life?” Cassie’s voice cracked. “Did she love me?”

“Ah, in her own way,
she loved you very much,” Tug responded. “Maybe she didn’t know how to love you
better. Maybe I should have done more to help her.

“I thought I would
be a bachelor until I met your mother. I was almost twice her age. She was
young and pretty.

“I never knew why
she thought I was such a good catch. Guess she was runnin’ from a home life
that wasn’t good. They expected her to raise her younger brothers and sisters,
and there was a slew of ‘em. Abigail did most of the diaperin’ and cookin’. Her
father was some kind of a traveling salesman. I seldom saw him. Her mother
seemed more hooked on soap operas than anything else.”

“That sounds like a
harsh existence.” Cassie absently twirled strands of hair around her fingers.

“Yeah, I imagine my
lifestyle of haulin’ from track to track was romantic at first. We had a
whirlwind relationship. Two months after we met, we got married. A month later
she was pregnant with you. And then reality sank in. For both of us.

“She stayed with me
on the road until she was six months along. Then I brought her back here. Your
aunt watched over her like a hawk. I don’t expect Abigail liked that one bit. You
were born, and for a while she seemed thrilled with you and with the family.”

“So what went
wrong? What happened to drive her away?”

Tug stared at Cassie’s
trophies on the shelf. “I’m not sure what to tell you. I knew she was gettin’
more and more unhappy. She made sure she didn’t get pregnant again. She said
she didn’t want so many kids around her that she’d feel like a slave, yet she
still seemed to care for you.”

“Well, something
must have soured her on me.”

Tug continued on as
if he hadn’t heard her. “Whatever glamour she found travelin’ with me on the
road quickly faded. She didn’t like stayin’ here by herself. There was no one
to run interference with your aunt. Both women had red-hot tempers.

“The downhill slide
started slowly, I think. But the spark that first sizzled so hot between
Abigail and me turned as cold as black ice.” Tug paused, then added softly, “I
got word from your aunt that Abigail would bring you down to the living room or
kitchen to leave with her, and then be gone for hours. Then it was days. Sometimes
she’d come back drunker than a skunk. Then she’d forget to even to tell Lizzy
she was leaving. First your aunt would know about it was hearin’ you screamin’
from your upstairs bedroom.”

Cassie’s jaw
dropped. “I didn’t know.”

“You were too young
to remember, thank goodness. I tried to get through to her, but she said I
loved my horses more than her. I don’t know, maybe she was right…She was so
young and beautiful. You have her beauty, you know? Finally, she just
disappeared.” He choked on his emotion. “I don’t know why she left, but I’m so
glad she didn’t take you with her.”

Cassie moved to
hold her father’s hands. “I didn’t mean to put you through a lot of pain,
making you remember like that.”

“It’s okay. We
should have talked about it years ago. But you didn’t ask. And I wasn’t about
to bring it up on my own. But Cassie…” He looked at her a long time, as if he
wanted to touch her soul. “You certainly have your mother’s blood in your veins
as well as my own. You have her beauty, no doubt about that. But you have so
much more than she did. You give of yourself freely. You can be patient, even
in spite of that fiery temper of yours.”

Cassie nodded,
watching through teary eyes, waiting while he put together what he wanted her
to hear.

“You will make a
super mother. Hell, you’ve been a mother to all those delinquent kids at the
group home. Lester and Sammy could never find a better mother. If you love the
man, don’t let your mother stand in the way of your dreams. She had her own and
chased them in her own way. Now it’s your turn.”

The morning chores
at the track were finished. Driving back to the farm, Cassie clutched the
steering wheel of the pickup tightly glancing over at her passenger. Clint
seemed engrossed with the passing billboards. She figured by this time she
should be able to read him fairly well, yet she felt like she hardly knew him. He
volunteered little about himself and responded to her questions with adequate
but certainly not revealing answers.

“So what was it
like growing up on the reservation?”

Clint turned and
looked at her blankly. “Huh?”

“What was growing
up like for you? You know that I bounced from track to track and that my mother
walked out on us when I was young. You know that my aunt filled in the best she
could. But I hardly know a thing about your childhood. I like your mom and
grandmother a lot.”

“Not much to tell.”
Clint shrugged. “I didn’t grow up on the reservation, although much of my
social life revolved around it. I had my share of bad and good. My sister and I
were well loved.” Clint smiled. “My Mom is such a great cook it’s amazing I’m
not roly-poly. Grandmother made sure we learned the
old ways,
as she put
it. I did the vision quest thing and learned about my place in the grand scheme
of things.”

“So what about your
father? How did your mom and dad meet?”

Clint’s features
clouded. He turned away again to watch the Chicago suburbs whiz by. “My father
was a geologist with one of the gas and oil companies sent in to determine
whether it would be profitable for the tribe to drill. He fell in love with the
high desert plateau.”

Cassie nodded. She
could understand that.

“The story goes
that he met my mother at a community dance. And theirs was a fantasy courtship.
Love at first sight, both said.” He grimaced, shifting his weight in the seat. “That
might have been true for them, but not for their families.”

“They didn’t like
the idea of them marrying.”

Clint laughed
bitterly. “That’s putting it mildly. His parents threatened to disown him if he
married beneath his station. Her family warned her of all kinds of bad
happenings if she married outside her race.”

“But they ignored
family threats and advice?”

“Yeah, to everyone’s
dismay. They ran off to Reno and married.”

After prolonged
silence, Cassie asked, “So what happened then?”

“My mother’s family
came to accept my father with reluctance, but at least they accepted him.”

“And your father’s?”
Cassie kept her eyes on the road, but listened closely.

“Well, let’s put it
this way. I’ve never met any grandparents or any other relative on that side of
the family. Don’t even know if any of them are still alive.”