Cassie's Cowboy Daddy (10 page)

Shooing her hands away before he lost the last shred of his sanity, Logan made short work of sliding the rest of her clothing down her legs. When she stepped out of them, he took a deep breath. He'd never seen a more perfect woman in his entire thirty-four years.

“This isn't fair,” she said, reaching for his waistband.

“I agree.” Impatient to feel all of her against him, he shucked his jeans and briefs, then kicked them aside.

“You're beautiful,” she said, her voice filled with awe.

Logan chuckled. “Women are beautiful. Men aren't.”

She nodded. “You are.”

He shook his head. “You're the one who's beautiful, perfect.”

He pulled her to him and groaned as the feel of her skin warmed the depths of his soul. Desperate to convey everything he was feeling but couldn't voice, he kissed her until she shivered with desire.

Sliding his hand between them, he reached down to touch her intimately, and to his immense satisfaction she moaned and melted into him. “That's right, sugar. It's going to be much better this time because now I know exactly what makes you hot and ready for me. What makes you go crazy.”

“But I have…the same advantage,” she said, sounding breathless.

Her small hand found his erection and Logan
thought his head might fly right off his shoulders. Keeping his promise to take things more slowly was going to be next to impossible with her talented little hands holding him that way.

She stroked and caressed him with such tenderness, his chest tightened with emotion. He'd never have believed it, but his hunger for her was even stronger than before. He wanted her with every cell of his being, wanted to show her how much their lovemaking meant to him.

Not sure how much longer his legs would support him, he picked her up and carried her to his bed. Pushing back the covers, he placed her on the cool navy sheets, then quickly turned and walked into the half bath adjoining his room. When he returned, he stretched out beside her and tucked under his pillow the foil packet he'd retrieved from the medicine cabinet.

Gathering her to him, he enjoyed the feel of soft feminine skin against his heated body. There was so much he wanted to tell her, but all the romantic things women wanted to hear had never come easily to him. Instead of trying to put his feelings into words, Logan decided to love her slowly, thoroughly, and when it was over she'd have no doubt how much she meant to him, how much she'd become a part of him.

He kissed the hollow at the base of her throat, then nibbled his way to her breast. Teasing her nipples with his tongue, he felt his own excitement build when she moaned and tangled her fingers in his hair to hold him to her.

“Feel good?”

“Mmmm.”

He smiled as he trailed kisses down her abdomen. “Hang on, sugar, it's going to get a lot better.”

“Logan…no…” She sounded almost desperate.

He raised his head to meet her embarrassed gaze. “Do you trust me, Cassie?”

“Yes.”

“Then lie back and let me give you pleasure.”

She hesitated only a moment before lying back against the pillows. Her small body trembled and he realized they were breaking new ground for her. Apparently her husband had never taken the time to love every inch of her, to worship her with his lips as well as his body. The man had been a complete and utter fool.

Kissing her intimately, Logan was rewarded with her soft moans, the sight of her hands gripping the sheet beside her.

“Logan…please.”

“What do you want, Cassie?” When she opened her eyes to look at him, he had no doubts what she wanted. But he needed to hear her tell him.

“Make love to me, Logan,” she said, her words a throaty plea.

He slowly kissed his way back up her body. “But I wanted this to last awhile longer,” he teased.

She opened her eyes and, holding his gaze, found him with her hands. His heart stalled, then took off at a dead run. Her silky palms slid along his shaft, stroking him, cupping his heaviness. Logan closed his eyes against the intense waves of need racing through him.

Taking her hands in his, he stopped her sensual
assault before he lost the last shred of his restraint. “Sugar, you've made your point.”

When he reached for their protection, his frustration knew no bounds. He raised the pillow and searched for the foil packet. It wasn't there.

“Looking for this?” Cassie asked, holding it between her fingers. Relieved, he started to take it from her, but she shook her head. Opening the tiny package, she held his gaze as she rolled their protection over his fevered flesh.

The intense desire in her eyes, the feel of her hands on his body and the obvious fact that she was comfortable with the intimacy they shared had him throbbing with the need to make her his. “Sugar, I don't mean to rush things, but I can't stand much more of this.”

Without a word she smiled, straddled his hips and, slowly easing herself down, took him inside. Logan had to grind his teeth and fight with every last ounce of strength he possessed to keep what small bit of sanity he had left.

Their gazes locked, Logan placed his hands on her hips to help her set a steady pace. He savored every moment of watching her expression change with the progression of her need. Her cheeks flushing with desire, her eyes sparkling with building passion and her willingness to share herself so intimately made his chest tighten. Cassie made love to him not only with her body, but with her heart and soul, as well.

He felt her tighten around him as she neared the peak, and his body bunched with the need to release himself inside her. Wanting, needing her to join him in the storm, Logan moved his hand to touch her
intimately. Her body tightened instantly, and he felt her inner muscles quiver and clench around him as wave upon wave of sensation drew her into complete fulfillment.

The pull of Cassie's body, the undeniable ecstasy on her beautiful face triggered his own explosion, and, surging into her, Logan groaned from the soul-shattering pleasure draining his body.

Completely exhausted, Cassie collapsed on top of his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. She was incredible, and so responsive. He decided if he died at that very moment, he'd leave the world a happy, satisfied man.

It took him a moment to realize that what he was feeling ran far deeper than pleasure and desire. The emotion he'd had invading every cell in his being since he'd opened his eyes to find her perusing his body while he sat in the bathtub that first day just might be love.

Could he take the chance on loving Cassie, then have her leave the Lazy Ace because she couldn't stand the isolation? Or worse yet, what if she or one of the babies became ill and he couldn't get them to a doctor in time?

When Cassie had come down with the flu he'd been scared half out of his mind that she'd develop pneumonia, as his mother had. Could he survive something like that? Or would he be like his father? When Logan's mother died, Cal Murdock had allowed his pain to turn into hatred and had directed every ounce of it toward his only son.

Logan closed his eyes as deep longing and loneliness warred with years of pain and guilt. He didn't
think he'd ever be that type of man, but he'd never loved anyone as completely as he loved Cassie and the girls.

And that scared the living hell out of him.

W
hen Hank left the breakfast table, grabbed Ginny in a bear hug and kissed her, Logan wondered if the couple might not need oxygen before it was over. He glanced at Cassie. He'd like to do the same with her, but in private.

Winking at her, he grabbed his hat and tapped Hank on the shoulder. “Come on, old buddy.” When Hank finally lifted his head, Logan chuckled. “If we don't get the cabin finished pretty soon, your first-born will be ready for college before the two of you get moved in.”

“Hey, gimme a break,” Hank said, grinning. “I'll finish the house after I finish makin' a baby.”

“Well, now that you mention it…” Ginny beamed. “I passed the test just this morning. I'm pregnant.”

“I'm gonna be a daddy!” Hank's shout of triumph could have been heard all the way down in Bear Creek.

Watching the happy couple embrace, Logan felt envy clench his gut. He glanced at Cassie. As ridiculous as the notion was, he found himself wishing they were the ones celebrating the good news of having a baby on the way.

In the three weeks following the camping trip, he and Cassie had shared as many nights together as they could without drawing attention to the fact that there was more between them than just joint ownership of the Lazy Ace. They'd talked about a lot of things during their nights together, but they hadn't verbally agreed to keep quiet about their…their what?

Affair?

No, that wasn't the right word. What he and Cassie shared ran much deeper than that.

Relationship?

He wasn't sure if that was the right word, either. Relationships screamed commitment and promises. But neither one of them had committed to anything, nor had they made any promises.

“Oh, Ginny, I'm so happy for you,” Cassie said, leaving the table to hug her friend.

Logan slapped Hank on the shoulder. “Congratulations.”

“Thanks,” Hank said. Holding Ginny to his side, the man looked happier than Logan had ever seen him.

His gaze drifted back to Cassie. The idea of mak
ing a few promises didn't scare him as it would have a month ago.

He watched her move around the kitchen. She looked a lot like the way he felt—dazed and more than a little confused. He wondered if she was having similar thoughts.

“Logan?” Hank tapped him on the shoulder. “Are you gonna stand there all day, or are we workin' on the cabin?” Grinning at his wife, Hank added, “I have a nest to finish.”

“Uh, sure,” Logan said, jamming his Resistol on his head. His gaze lingered on Cassie for a moment longer, then he headed for the door.

He couldn't believe what was running through his mind, but making a commitment to Cassie and asking to become part of her little family was beginning to sound like a damned fine idea.

 

Her heart pounding in her chest like an out-of-control jackhammer, Cassie watched the men leave to work on the foreman's house. “Ginny, after we get the girls settled down to play, would you mind watching them for a few minutes?”

“No problem, Cass.” Ginny wiped the babies' faces. “I'll play with them until they get sleepy, then I'll start making a list of things I want to pick up down in Laramie the next time we visit Hank's grandmother.”

“Thanks,” Cassie said, feeling as if the walls were closing in on her. She had to get upstairs and find her datebook.

“Are you all right, Cass? You look a little—” Ginny paused “—flustered? Upset?”

Cassie nodded as she handed Chelsea to Ginny, then turned back to pick up Kelsie. “I'm just a little tired, that's all.”

Once they had the girls settled in the playpen, she barely resisted the urge to wring her hands as she waited for Ginny to come back downstairs with her notepad and pen. “I won't be long,” Cassie said, surprised that she sounded calm, considering all the butterflies fluttering around in her stomach. “I have to check on a couple things.”

“Take your time,” Ginny said, smiling. “The girls and I will be just fine.”

Cassie climbed the stairs on wobbly legs and barely managed to make it to her room before her nerves got the better of her. Tears blurred her eyes and her hands shook uncontrollably as she rummaged through her underwear drawer to find her personal calendar. She had to be mistaken about the dates.

Quickly checking the number of weeks since her last period, she bit her lower lip and moaned aloud. How could she be two weeks late?

She walked over and sank down on the bed. How on earth could this have happened? They'd always been so meticulous about protection. Not once had they…

The camping trip. They hadn't used anything that first night up in the mountains.

Reality slammed into her and had her frantically thumbing through the calendar once again. Adding up the days, she shook her head, then added them again just to be sure. This couldn't be happening. It was impossible.

But even as she stubbornly clung to the thought,
Cassie knew she was only fooling herself. It was not only possible, it was probable.

Just because their first night together should have been safe didn't mean it was. Countless babies had been conceived during a “safe time” of the month.

She closed her eyes and fought the panic clawing at her insides. How would she ever be able to tell Logan? How would he react?

Stan had insisted he wanted children until the day she found out the twins were on the way. But Logan had always made it clear that he wasn't father material and didn't want kids.

Feeling desperate, Cassie tried to think of other reasons for her missed period. Maybe she wasn't pregnant. Factors such as the flu or the excitement of moving to the ranch could have delayed her cycle. And the one sure sign that she was pregnant hadn't shown up.

Within days of conceiving the twins, she'd known beyond a shadow of doubt that she was expecting. It had been the only time in her life she'd ever experienced nausea. So far she hadn't even been queasy. Far from it. For the past few days she'd been eating like a horse and felt great.

Taking a deep breath, she rose to her feet and tucked the calendar back inside the drawer. She wouldn't think about it right now. She'd wait until the end of the week to see if she started. Only then would she allow herself to fall apart and have a full-fledged panic attack.

 

Two days later Cassie walked down the lane leading to the foreman's cabin, clutching the handle of
the picnic basket. It had been Ginny's turn to take lunch to Logan and Hank, but suffering her first bout of morning sickness, she'd begged off and asked to play with the twins while Cassie went.

Cassie didn't mind the quarter-mile hike. It gave her the chance to enjoy the warm sun on her face and the crisp breeze that had already started changing the aspens from green to their early-autumn gold.

And it gave her time to think.

It had been two days since she'd realized that she might be pregnant with Logan's baby, and in that time she'd changed her mind at least a hundred times about what to do. She feared he might be like Stan and ask her to do something she'd never even consider. Or he could face up to his responsibility and offer financial help in supporting the child, but nothing more.

Cassie really didn't believe he'd take either stance on the matter. He'd seemed outraged when he'd learned about Stan's demands over her pregnancy with the twins, and she'd watched Logan with her daughters. He had too much love to give to turn his back on his own child.

But that posed another question. Why had he indicated that he never wanted children?

She shook her head. She didn't know. And the only logical conclusion she'd been able to come to in the past couple of days had been to tell Logan what she suspected about being pregnant, then proceed from there.

As she pondered how to break the news to him, the willows lining the small stream running parallel to the lane rustled. Cassie stopped and glanced
around. Something wasn't right. The breeze had died and there was no reason for anything to be moving the branches, unless…there was something behind them? She swallowed hard.

Something big. Something very hairy. Something with a lot of teeth.

She started walking faster. Whatever was on the other side of the brush to her left was keeping up with her. Her heart beating double-time, she broke into a jog. The unidentified animal kept pace.

“Logan!” Over halfway to the little house, she hoped he could hear her. “Logan!”

Suddenly the bushes just ahead of her shook violently and she heard a loud grunt. Not more than a split second later a huge black bear emerged to block her path.

Cassie wasn't sure if it was Samson or another bear, but it didn't matter. She couldn't stop herself from screaming at the top of her lungs. But instead of the animal retreating as Samson had done up in the mountains, this bear just trained his beady bear eyes on her, sniffed the air, then opened his mouth and let loose with a loud bellow.

All she saw were a lot of large, yellow-white, sharp-looking teeth. She screamed again and closed her eyes. If he was going to devour her, she certainly didn't want to watch all of those teeth coming at her.

Just when she thought her heart would burst from pounding so hard, she heard a commotion and opened her eyes. Logan and Hank were running up behind the beast. Yelling and waving his arms, Logan diverted the bear's attention to himself and her
heart stopped completely. What if the animal attacked him?

“Cassie, don't make a sound,” Logan said, keeping his gaze on the bear. “Move slow and easy over toward Hank while I get Samson calmed down.”

She glanced to her right. Hank stood several feet away, his face as white as a sheet of tissue paper. Doing as Logan had commanded, Cassie eased her way over to Hank. He immediately shoved her behind him, putting himself between her and possible danger.

Only then did she realize she still held the picnic basket. Food. Bear food. She released the death grip she had on the handle and, dropping it, peered around Hank to see if Logan was all right. To her amazement, the agitated bear stopped bellowing, sniffed the air, then stared at Logan.

“Hank, toss that picnic basket over here,” Logan said, keeping several feet between himself and Samson.

Throwing the container to Logan, Hank walked over to a huge boulder and leaned against it. Cassie watched Logan catch the wicker basket, then toss it as far into the brush as he could. Samson stood for a moment sniffing the air before he grunted, then crashed through the brush in the direction the picnic basket had gone.

Hank took a deep breath. “My God, I think I just lost a good ten years off my life. I thought Ginny…I mean, she was supposed to—”

“Ginny got sick…after you left to come down here,” Cassie said breathlessly. “She asked me to bring lunch to you and Logan.”

Apparently satisfied that Samson was no longer a threat, Logan walked straight to Cassie and took her into his arms. “Are you all right?” At odds with his actions, he sounded angry.

Nodding, she burrowed into his embrace, not caring what Hank might think. “How often does he make an appearance around here?” she asked.

“Too often,” Hank said disgustedly.

“I'm going to call Jim Bennett over at Fish and Wildlife and see if he can relocate Samson to one of the wilderness areas,” Logan said, hugging her close. “Or maybe check around to see if there's a zoo in need of a bear.”

“It's about damned time,” Hank muttered. He pushed away from the boulder. “I'm going up to the house to check on Ginny. See you two later.”

“You're shaking,” Logan said, his tone gentle. “Come on. Let's get to the cabin and sit down.”

Her legs felt as if rubber bands had replaced muscle, and Cassie had to lean on Logan in order to walk the rest of the way to the foreman's house. “I think from now on, I'll drive when I have to bring you and Hank lunch.”

Logan shook his head. “From now on, we'll either take lunch with us or skip it.” He lifted her to the opened tailgate of his truck, then sat down beside her and put his arm around her. “You sure you're okay?”

“I'll be fine.” Leaning her head against his shoulder, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath to calm the uneasiness in the pit of her stomach. She could tell he was still angry by the rigid set of his
jaw and the tension in his deep voice. Was he upset with her for screaming at his bear again?

“I'm sorry I screamed, but I don't think it scared Samson this time,” she said. “I think he wanted your lunch.”

“That's what bothers me,” Logan said, his arm tightening around her. “He's losing all fear of humans.”

They sat in silence for several minutes as Cassie drew strength from the man she loved with all her heart. She didn't know how to tell him she was almost certain he was going to be a father, or how he'd take the news. She wasn't even sure how to broach the subject.

Maybe if she started off by talking with him about the twins, then she could ask why he'd said he didn't want children. From there maybe she'd get a clue about how to proceed.

“Did you notice that Kelsie is getting another tooth?”

“So I'll be walking the floor with her again soon?” The anger in his voice had been replaced with tenderness at the mention of her daughter.

“I still don't know why you didn't wake me to take care of her.”

“You were tired.” He kissed the top of her head. “Besides, I didn't mind. Chelsea and Kelsie are cute kids.”

“You're really good with children.” She took a deep breath. He'd just given her the opening she'd been looking for. Now, if she could just find the courage to proceed. “Why did you tell me you weren't?”

Tension stiffened his body, but he remained silent.

Her stomach clenched. “Logan?”

“My father didn't set a very good example of the way a man should be around kids,” he finally said, his voice tight. “I didn't want to make a child feel the way I did growing up.”