Calming the Rush of Panic (17 page)

Foundational Practice: The “Web of Life” Meditation

Find a comfortable position on a cushion or chair or lying on a bed or the floor. Turn off your phone or other devices so you can remain undisturbed. Read and practice the script for this guided meditation below, pausing briefly after each paragraph, or feel free to download a recording from New Harbinger Publications at newharbinger.com/25264.

Begin by taking a few moments to arrive and settle in by bringing your awareness into your mind and body. Acknowledge how you are feeling and let it be.

Gently shift to mindful breathing, being aware of breathing in and out…no need to manipulate the breath in any way—just breathing in and out, normally and naturally.

Now begin to feel the connection of your body on the chair, cushion, bed, or mat, and feel its connection to the floor. Reflect on the connection of the floor to the building you are in and its connection to the earth farther below.

Feel that sense of being held by the earth below you, and just allow yourself to be held by the earth. You are in a safe space, and you can breathe in and out with ease in your body and mind.

Feel how the earth rises up to hold and embrace you. There is nothing more you need to do, nowhere you have to go, and no one you have to be. Just being held in the heart of kindness and letting be.

Reflect on your loved ones being held in the same way—with safety and ease of body and mind. Reflect on how the earth holds all beings, whether they are acquaintances, strangers, or difficult ones—with no bias, no discrimination, no separation.

Reflect on how this earth holds all beings, forsaking none—whether they be small or large.

Reflect on how this earth does not exist in a vacuum, that it is connected to a solar system and vast universe. We all are interconnected. Our bodies and the earth, the sun and the stars, are composed of the same matter—the same basic particles, joined in different ways.

Feeling into that sense of connection and interconnection that we are all made of stardust. Feeling that sense of being home within your body and mind with a true sense of belonging and connection.

Just breathing in and out, feeling the grace of this universe—no isolation nor separation, feeling that sense of connection and interconnection and being at home in your being. Nothing more you need to do, go, get, or push away. Imperfectly perfect as you are, resting in the heart of this universe.

May all beings here and everywhere dwell with peace.

How to Practice The “Web of Life” Meditation

You are welcome to practice this meditation any time that it feels useful for you. Make it your own and let it begin to seep into your life. You can be creative with this practice, like Eli in the story below. As you practice the “web of life,” you will feel more connected to yourself and all of life.

Eli’s Story

Eli had lived with panic for a long time. Even in childhood, he was jumpy and startled easily. He couldn’t quite identify where this all came from, but when he was in college he realized that he needed to do something about it because the panic was deeply affecting his life.

Eli heard about mindfulness and decided to learn more. As he brought more awareness into himself, he could see that he wasn’t feeling so secure with the world and the universe. The world felt really big, so big that at times he felt out of control and feared that he would lose himself, like being swallowed and consumed.

Eli learned how to do the loving-kindness and “web of life” meditations—he especially liked the sense of interconnection at the end of these meditations, which made him feel safe. One day while he was sitting in a park near his home, he decided to try the “web of life” practice that he had learned, and he made it his own. He began by being mindful of his breathing and then reflected on how the oxygen he was receiving was being offered to him by the plant life and trees around him, and that the carbon dioxide he exhaled, in turn, fed the plants and trees around him. As he reflected on how he and the plant world reciprocated each other in perfect harmony and union, he felt wonderful. Quite spontaneously a feeling of the interconnectedness of life—how we all support one another to live in this world and universe—washed over him.

Eli began to take time during his day to notice and experience this interconnection to the “web of life.” When he was in the gym, he would watch people working out near him, and it seemed as if everyone were dancing together. People were moving in unison, a collage of shapes and sizes exercising together in harmony, with a common humanity. He began to see these interconnections just about everywhere he went: at the bank, at the store, at home, and at work. There were times when Eli would go to the edge of the ocean, look out over the grand expanse of the mingling of the sea and sky, and breathe in and out and feel his connection to himself, the world, and the universe. Eli found his true home and felt safe in the midst of it all.

Applied Practices

Let’s move now into some applied practices to cultivate a sense of ease and peace beyond panic.

Contentment

Have you ever noticed that a great deal of your day is spent waiting? Most likely you wait to pump your gas, you wait to purchase items, you wait to speak to someone in person, you wait for access to the photocopier or fax machine, and you wait on the phone to be helped. The rush of panic may find you at any one of these times. If you’re experiencing a panic attack, perhaps while waiting in a dreaded line, this next mindful breathing practice will help nurture feelings of abundance and thriving.

You can do mindful breathing in any position—sitting, standing, or even while moving—so long as you are at ease and attentive.

1. To connect fully with the present moment, you need to pay deep and nonjudgmental attention. Start with the breath. Breathe mindfully for about a minute. Become a kind observer of your own breath sensations as the air moves in and out of your body. As you become a more sensitive observer, notice different qualities in each breath, in or out, and the space and stillness between the breaths as well. Bring your attention to the physical sensations of your breathing. Focus on one part of your body, such as your nose or abdomen, where you can actually feel your breath moving in and out. Allow your attention to rest there. Air rushing in. Air rushing out.
   
2. You may notice at times that your mind will want to wander. Inattentiveness, distraction, and mindlessness are common and frequent obstacles to staying in the present moment. Not paying attention to what you are doing can separate you from the richness in every moment of life. When you notice that your mind is elsewhere, simply pay attention on purpose to your breathing and you will easily return to being present. You’ve done nothing wrong. The mind likes to wander and will do it countless times. Each time, gently but firmly bring your attention back.
   
3. With your next breath, set your intentions for this practice, stating what you would like to gain by it. On the inhale, say aloud or to yourself:
   May this practice connect me with life as it is, with greater contentment. May this practice deepen my awareness to the fullness of each moment.
   When you set your intentions, you are sowing the seeds for contentment to take root and grow inside you. You begin to open your gratitude to the wealth of air, beauty, sky, and earth that is supporting you at all times. Feel free to make up your own intentions that resonate more fully with your current situation.
   
4. As you continue to turn your gentle attention to your breathing, remember to just let each breath be. There’s no need to make anything happen or alter anything about yourself. Allow yourself to just be who you are in this moment. You are tracking the patterns of every sensation and breath. Breathe in, pause, breathe out, pause, and so on. Notice the unique character of each breath.
   
5. End your meditation by shifting your focus off of your breathing and sensations and moving gently into your next activity.
   

Self-Love and Appreciation

No matter how you get it—at home, at the gym, cycling, swimming, running—exercise is an important part of nurturing self-love. Your body is a powerful and marvelous wonder of bones, muscles, blood, and skin. You can move and stretch, lift and turn, twist and fold, and clench and relax. When you think about all the physical limitations that many people confront every day, your body is truly miraculous! Your body is also a perfect subject on which to exercise purposeful awareness, particularly when you’re in the throes of a panic attack. This next practice, a version of S.T.O.P., will enhance your appreciation and love for yourself and your body. Try it now.

You can do this practice sitting, standing, lying down, or moving. Make sure that you’re in a comfortable position, yet one that supports wakefulness.

1. Begin by tuning into your breath. Each breath holds the key to being alive. Take a minute or two to pay kind attention to your every inhalation and exhalation. Notice all the physical sensations that accompany each breath, and notice where you feel your breath in your body.
   
2. Observe whatever you’re thinking, feeling, or sensing in your mind and body in this moment. A vast array of messages will pour out of you, such as
   I’m thirsty. My foot hurts. I feel exhausted. I wish my boyfriend would call. When will I feel better?
   Acknowledge any and all emotions and sensations that come up, and allow them to follow their own course. Notice how you have a degree of control over some thoughts but not others. Some feelings are prominent and want your attention. Some sensations are subtle and then evaporate. All the things that you experience in your mind and body are like passengers in a moving train, with each passenger representing different mental, emotional, and physical parts of yourself. For example, one passenger is your negative self-talk, another passenger is your worry, and yet another passenger is your fatigue.
   
3. Remember to tune in to your breathing and resume being present.
   
4. Take this conscious moment to practice beginner’s mind. If you skip over all the little experiences, you may slide back into mindlessness. So keep looking to see something new, as if you are a child noticing how your body works for the first time. You can learn something new even if it is something you have already explored a hundred times before. With practice, beginner’s mind will help you develop a sense of awe, a feeling of excitement and wonder in your practice of mindfulness.
   
5. Now, if you have been moving, stop and return to a stationary position, such as sitting, standing, or lying down. Take this moment to experience some stillness in your body. Lean into the stillness by following your heartbeat or your breath. Notice where stillness lives in your body—perhaps your belly or face or feet. Feel this peaceful stillness radiate throughout every part of your body—your limbs, torso, fingers, toes, ears, and mouth. Remember, you carry this stillness within you at all times. When you befriend this reservoir of stillness inside, you’ll also find a deeper appreciation for your body.
   
6. Carry on with your day, practicing kindness and caring for yourself.
   

Whether you practice gentle movement, such as yoga, tai chi, or qigong, or more rigorous workouts, exercise is an essential part of cultivating a healthy relationship with your body. A mindful awareness of your body during any activity will help you deepen your love for your body and appreciate all that you ask of it and all that it gives to you each day.

The Gift of Panic

No one in their right mind considers panic a blessing.
How can my most agonizing fear produce something beneficial or positive?
You may berate yourself for your panic attacks. You may drive your family nuts with your constant hypervigilance and chronic anxious thoughts and feelings. Your friends may not be able to understand or help you. Your panic may have negatively affected your romantic relationships, career, and vacations over the years. And no pill has ever cured panic attacks.

You may ask,
Just how could anything positive possibly come out of being riddled with sudden and extremely intense episodes of palpations, uncontrollable shaking, light-headedness, and hot flushes, combined with racing emotions and thoughts of worst-case scenarios and fears?
“Show me the gift of panic when all I can see is a long list of negatives,” you may demand.

This next practice will help you highlight the pearls of wisdom that often get overlooked at the peak of your panic. You can do it at home or at work. May it be a useful reminder during a panic attack for planting the seeds of what your panicky thoughts and feelings are here to teach you and the hidden blessing behind the panic.

Seated comfortably or lying down, check in with your posture and begin when you are feeling attentive and awake.