By a Thread (16 page)

She was lying in bed with the silliest smile on her face. “George you’re tickling me,” she squirmed under his touch. “What are you doing?”

He had a red sharpie marker and was drawing on her back, “I’m having fun.”

“With what?” She tried to look over her shoulder to see what he was drawing. He was holding her down so she couldn’t move around, she felt the cold tip of the marker on her shoulder blade. “I hope you aren’t drawing circles on my fat like they do in sororities.”

“I want to tell you that you are beautiful, you know that? Inside and out.” He kissed her left shoulder blade, “but you are broken. I plan on fixing you.”

“Oh really, how do you plan on doing that?” she asked without moving.

He leaned down and kissed her lovingly on the back of her neck, up slowly to behind her ear. A shutter went through her entire body. “Very slowly, and one piece at a time, love.”

She closed her eyes.
It’s too much,
she thought
.
She was letting him in and it would not end well, she knew that. He was getting really close, too close. He held her still and drew a little while longer on her back and then kissed her tattoo. Bending to her left ear he whispered. “I promise.”

Stella got up to clear her head and went into the bathroom. She was trying to see what he had drawn on her back. He came to the doorway of her bathroom watching her with a smile on his face. He grabbed the top of the door ledge and hung onto it, amused. Stella stopped what she was doing and looked at him, clearly turned on. He used his fingertips to skim down her back all the way to her tailbone. Her nipples responded immediately. He grabbed her and pushed her up against the small portion of the wall in her bathroom that was available. Stella wrapped both legs around him and gasped as he entered her.

After they were done, they got into the shower together. Stella was trying to squeeze past George on the outside of the shower when she saw the outline of the red heart he had drawn on her back, now staining her bathroom wall. She turned to address it, but was caught off guard by his mouth and roaming hands.

“El?” Patrick yelled from the side of her bedroom. “You decent?”

“Fuck,” she said exasperated. “Patrick, I’m in the shower.”

“Nothing I haven’t seen,” his voice coming closer. George’s eyebrows shot up in a question.

“I’m not alone. GET OUT!” Stella pulled the shower curtain making sure Patrick couldn’t see in.

“Who you in there with?” Patrick called, mocking her.

“I swear...” Stella looked at George, who was laughing silently. She hit him playfully, “It’s not funny.”

George kissed her again and then turned her around, taking care to wash every inch of her. “You’re beautiful when you’re frustrated.”

Although sex with George started off a few times a week, it changed to every night. Stella had not relented on her policy that he couldn’t spend the night. George was wearing her down though, staying later and later. One night five months into their thing her cell phone started ringing, it was 2:00 am. She ripped her lips off George and blew a deep breath out getting her bangs out of her eyes.

“Hold on,” she pushed herself off the bed and grabbed her phone. “Dad?” Her voice broke with concern.

“It’s your Mom, she’s been in any accident. She’s in the ICU at Grady. She was in a wreck, a fucking tractor trailer, Stella.” George moved behind her, wrapping his arms around her.

“Is she okay?” Stella’s voice was small.

“She...God... Stella I have no fucking idea.”

“I’ll be there tomorrow.”

“Call me on your way,” her Dad’s voice was unrecognizable. “Stella I love you.”

“I love you too.” She hung up the phone and shrugged out of George’s grasp. Talking to herself, “this is just like fucking Jamie.”

“Who’s Jamie?”

Her eyes snapped to George’s like she had just remembered he was there. “You should go, George.”

“No, what’s going on?” Closing the space between them he stood as close as he could get without touching her. “Is it your mom?”

A tear fell from one eye, “Yes.”

“What can I do?” George tentatively ran his fingertips down her cheek, wiping away her tear.

“You should go,” she answered.

“Anything but that, El.” Backing away from his touch she pulled her suitcase out and threw it on the bed. Stella began throwing clothes in the suitcase, not looking at him.

“What am I going to say, George? Sure drive me down to see my mom, who might be dead. Dad this is George, we’re fucking.” She looked at him, his face showing hurt. After a few minutes of them staring at one another, she pulled the closest shirt over her head and walked up stairs.

Stella knocked on Patrick’s door. It cracked open, “What’s up,” his eyes widening.

“My mom’s been in an accident, I’m leaving as soon as possible in the morning.”

“I’ll go with you. Get some sleep I’ll wake you at five.” He shut the door.
He’s always so robotic in a crisis,
she thought. She turned around and saw George standing at the bottom of the stairs. “You headed out?”

“No.” He pulled Stella to him and breathed her in, “No.” George walked her back to her bed, peeled off her shirt, and lifted her off her feet.

“Not really in the mood, George,” she said without life.

Laying her on the bed, he laid next to her and held her until she fell asleep. At 4:50, he kissed her awake. For a minute she kissed him back until she woke up. “What...”

“El...” he pushed himself off the bed and slipped his pants on, “Let me help. Please.”

“Fuck, George.” She rolled over showing him her bare ass. She left her head down for a whole minute hoping he would just leave.

“Please.” George pleaded.

“Fine. Can you come let Coop out?” Stella reached as far as she could without getting out of bed and pulled her bag toward her.

“Okay. How many times a day?”

“At least three. Run with him if you would. I’ll leave instructions on feeding him.” She didn’t turn around when he kissed her cheek and left.

The nine-hour drive to Atlanta was long and mostly silent, just like when Patrick drove her to Jamie’s funeral. George texted her almost every hour. It was exhausting. She was not cut out for a “relationship” and this just solidified it.

“El,” Patrick put his arm across her shoulders. “Your mom’ll be okay.”

“You don’t know that Patrick, don’t make statements that you don’t know about.” Stella lashed out at him, but he understood and took it.

“I took a couple of days off work, so there is no hurry back,” Patrick said ignoring her last comment.

Stella looked at him, “Thanks. You know... you’re always coming to my rescue.”

“Pretty much,” he glanced at her.

“Why?”

“You’re in desperate need of rescue on a consistent basis.”

Stella looked at her hands she clasped in her lap. “I’m sorry.”

“For what,” he asked.

“For always needing to be rescued... by you.”

“Don’t be sorry for that, El, you’re the sister I never had. I’d do anything for you, you know that.”

“I wish you didn’t have to do anything for me Patrick.” She sighed and blew her bangs out of her face. “I can’t seem to get right... you know. I’m starting to feel a little more normal. I guess getting laid helps.” Stella looked out the window as they passed from Virginia to North Carolina.

“Getting laid always helps.” Patrick smiled.

Stella’s phone beeped. “Oh My GOD, if George texts me again I will be getting laid by someone else...”

Mom’s up. She’s okay.

“It’s my dad, my mom woke up.” She felt like a weight lifted off her back. “She’s going to be okay.” She let one tear fall down her face before she shook it off and smiled.

“See, I’m always right. You should know that by now.” Patrick pulled her into a sideways hug.

She and Patrick stayed in Atlanta for two days before heading back to D.C. They hung out at the hospital pretty much the entire time. Stella’s mother had a broken femur and a concussion, but was set to be released the next week.

Texting George that she and Patrick were headed home, she slung her bag over her shoulder and shuffled through the humid, depressing Georgia heat to her car. She sighed, only three steps out of the house and sweat was rolling down her back. Patrick walked out of the front door with her dad, shaking his hand. Patrick smiled at Stella and then saluted her father. “Ready?” Stella asked as he pulled the door shut.

“Roger.”

She laughed. “You know, for the past four years you have been the most important person in my life.” She reversed the car and made her way toward the highway. Looking straight ahead, “I know I don’t say it enough, thanks.”

“What was that again?” He smirked at her.

“You heard me, jackass.”

“Oh, that’s what I thought you said.”

Patrick was letting Stella drive the first leg of the trip while he was getting work done. Stella let her mind wander. She would have to do something about George when she got back. He was treating her like a girlfriend; she was not his girlfriend.

“Whatcha thinking about over there?” Patrick looked up from his iPad.

“Just trying to figure out what to do with George.” Stella blew the bangs out of her eyes.

“What do you mean?” Patrick put down his IPad and stared at the road.

“I really don’t think I can do whatever it is we’re doing anymore. It’s getting hard.” Stella stared straight ahead.

“Wait, are you serious?” Patrick rubbed his shaved head. “It’s getting hard? What’s hard about it? He does whatever you want him to.”

Her head snapped over to Patrick, “Um he most certainly does not. He keeps pushing me Patrick. He’s pushing me...”

“Pushing you?”

“I don’t know. I’m not sure I can explain, I’m just not ready for what he wants and he doesn’t seem to care about that.”

“Isn’t that a good thing?”

“No. It’s not. I’m fine with just sex and nothing else. I can’t do anything else.”

“El, you have been doing everything else since you hooked up with George.”

After she got back from Atlanta, George began routinely sleeping with his hand on her tattoo, like he was trying to put her back together or pretend there wasn’t a hole in her heart. Stella stretched and shifted so that his hand fell from her back. George pulled Stella into his chest and inhaled her hair.

“What time is it?” Stella whispered.

“It’s five,” George smoothed her hair out of her face. He leaned into her and kissed her mouth gently. “You want me to leave?”

“No...” Stella ran her hand over George’s chest. “But, I need you to leave. I’m sorry.” Stella whispered.

George gathered her into his arms and whispered in her ear, “What’s two hours, El? Let me stay.”

“It’s what I need.”

He sighed and turned over on his back, “You’re worth it,” he said. He had only been asleep for a couple of hours and he had dark circles under his eyes.

With both hands on his chest she could barely make out his eyes in the dark. “That’s doubtful.”

George sighed and kissed her one more time, “Please know I want to sleep with you and wake up with you, okay.”

“Okay.” Stella blew her bangs out of her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

George sat up and walked in the bathroom and shut the door. Stella got up and let Cooper out the back door. She felt his arms wrap around her and it soothed some of her unease.

“Do you always walk around naked in your house? You live with two guys. You’re the best roommate ever.” She could hear his smile.

“I’ve actually heard that before,” she said.

“Can I see you later?”

“Sure, I can always use free drinks.”

“I mean maybe lunch before I go in?” George tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

“No, I’ve got a paper. I have to decide on my topic and I haven’t even started yet.” She pulled him closer and whispered, “I’ll definitely see you tomorrow night though.”

He brushed his thumb over her nipple, which she immediately responded to. “Not fair, George,” Stella almost growled.

“Not trying to be fair, love.”

Stella was coming out of the bathroom when she heard steps down into her room. She peered around the corner, calling out, “Patrick? I thought you went out?”

“El, it’s me.” George called the same time Stella realized it was him coming down the stairs. Cooper got up from her bed, the entire back end of his body shaking happily. George stepped and let Cooper smell him.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” she asked pulling at her tank top self-consciously.

He held up pizza and beer, “I thought we could watch the game.”

“What game?” Stella looked at him like he had lost his mind.

“The Steelers and the Redskins. You have no idea what I’m talking about?” George put the pizza and beer on her desk. “I know you watch football.”

“I watch college football George. I don’t really watch NFL.” Stella walked over to where he was standing and wrapped her arms around him, inhaling his scent of rosemary and mint.

“Really?” He asked, resting his chin on the top of her head.

“Yep, sorry to disappoint you.”

George looked defeated, “I guess I can go.” He grabbed the pizza and beer.

“No. No… You don’t have to go. It’s not like I hate NFL, but I don’t really have a team that I watch on a regular basis. My roommates watch, but I usually read or study on Sundays.” Stella walked to the back door and let Cooper out. “I’ll make an exception for you.” She smiled.

He put the pizza and beer back on the desk. “Good, I don’t want to miss kick off. You got plates?”

“Sure.” Stella went to the kitchen and grabbed two plates and glasses, some napkins and forks. When she walked downstairs she saw that George had made himself at home and was lying on her bed on his stomach surfing through the channels trying to find the game. “We have satellite TV.”

“I know El, I have been here before.” He said, laughing at her.

“Well, we really haven’t been watching TV when you’ve been here,” she retorted.

“So you really don’t like NFL?”

“That’s not what I said, George.” Stella walked over to her bed and lay on her stomach next to him. Her stomach did the flip thing it did when George was around. “I like NFL, it’s just I’m so busy with school I can only waste one day during the weekend on football and I LOVE college football. “

“Okay, that makes sense.” George pulled her to him and kissed her gently. “You want some pizza?”

She shook her head. “But yes for beer.” George got up and got pizza and a beer for himself and got her a beer as well. “So who do you root for?”

“Steelers.” He took a bite of his pizza.

“One of my favorite players from Georgia played for them for awhile. Hines Ward.” She took the beer he handed her.

“You know football.” George said looking at her with an expression she couldn’t place.

“I guess, why?”

“You just keep getting sexier.” George took another bite of pizza. “Could you take off your clothes to watch the game with me?”

“Sure,” she said and laughed when his jaw dropped. She took her shirt off and was working on her pants when he tackled her.

George was drinking his third beer while propped on her bed watching the game and Stella was reading with her head in his lap, highlighting what she thought were important pieces of the case she was reading, but she ended up highlighting the entire case. “Kind of defeats the purpose,” she muttered. George had his arm casually on her stomach, which was causing all sorts of concentration issues for Stella. She shifted her body and lay on her stomach with her feet at the head of the bed and her face at the bottom.

“Best game ever,” George said.

Stella looked up, “Are the Steelers winning?”

“No, but you’re laying there naked...”

“It’s not like you haven’t seen me before,” she winked at him and went back to reading.

“You’re so gorgeous El, it wouldn’t matter how many times I’ve seen you naked. You take my breath away every time.”

“Okay,” she said rolling over to look at him. “That was a really good line. You should use it on someone better than me,” Stella rolled back over and continued reading. After a significant amount of time of George being silent she looked back at him, he had an unreadable expression on his face. “What?”

“You’re clueless and so hard to deal with sometimes.” George rubbed his hand over his shaved head.

“Clueless, I’m not sure. Hard to deal with yes, all the time.” Stella crawled over to where George was sitting and straddled him. “What’s so hard right now?” Stella leaned in and kissed his neck.

George groaned and gave in to her without responding to her question.