Burn for Burn (6 page)

My mom said, “Why do you have to take sides? Why not be the one to bring them back together?”

“I doubt Rennie would listen,” I said.

“You could at least try,” she urged me. “Kat’s been through a lot. She needs her friends.”

I felt a pang of guilt. Kat’s mom had died the year before. Her mom had been sick for a long time. Kat didn’t want to talk about it, not to me at least. She talked to my mom sometimes, though, when Rennie and I were hanging out in my room.

“I’ll try,” I told my mom.

Then I had this great idea. For the first day of school, I would give Rennie and Kat friendship necklaces. It would bind us together again, smooth out the bad feelings.

My mom and I picked them out from the nice jewelry store in White Haven, the place where my dad always gets my mom something for their anniversary. Identical gold necklaces, with a special charm for each of us. I was really excited to give them the black velvet boxes; I knew that Rennie especially would love it.

That first day of school Rennie’s mom came to pick me up, and I expected to see both Kat and Rennie in the backseat. They lived on the same side of the island, and I lived farthest away.

But Kat wasn’t there, just Rennie in her new jean mini, with the decorative stitching on the back pockets. I climbed into the car, and asked, “Is Kat sick?”

Rennie shook her head.

When she saw her mom eyeing us in the rearview mirror, Rennie leaned in and whispered, “I didn’t want to pick her up. I’m over her.”

“Did you tell her you weren’t coming to get her?” I whispered back. What if Kat was outside waiting for us? What if she was late on the first day of high school?

“She’ll figure it out,” Rennie said. She touched her nose and asked, worried, “Does it look swollen?”

Even though I’d planned on giving Rennie and Kat their necklaces at the same time, I went ahead and gave Rennie hers right then. She seemed grumpy, and I wanted to start our day off on a nice note. She squealed so loudly, her mom slammed on the breaks. Her charm was a heart. Mine was a tiny gold cupcake. We both put our necklaces on right away.

I put Kat’s in her locker. She didn’t buy a lock when we went back-to-school shopping. She said she’d just forget the combination anyway. Besides, nobody stole on the island; it was totally safe.

When I saw Kat come down the hallway later that day, her eyes were red, and she wasn’t wearing the necklace. Her charm was a gold key. I liked how the key was pretty, but there was also something tough and practical about it. Just like Kat.

She walked right by me.

I tried to bring it up to Rennie later, to see if there was a way we could get things back to how they were before. But she refused. She didn’t even want to talk about it. For Rennie it was over. Erased. She had a way of doing that. Erasing the stuff she didn’t like. I’d just never seen her erase a person before.

*   *   *

I dry my face with a paper towel. I turn to toss it into the trash, and with my back to her, I say, “Honestly, I never thought your breath stunk. For what it’s worth.” I realize that these might be the first real words I’ve spoken to her in years.

Kat stares at me, and I know she’s surprised.

And then, from the last stall, there’s a sound. Shallow breaths, the kind you have to fight to take when you’re crying. Both of our heads swivel toward it. “Who’s there?” I call out, panicky, like I’ve been caught doing something bad.

“Yo. Who’s in here?” Kat says.

There’s no answer. Then Kat marches down to the stall and kicks the door open with her boot.

CHAPTER FIVE

MARY

I
’M PERCHED ON TOP OF THE TOILET, HUGGING MY KNEES
to my chest.

The stall door swings open. That spitting girl from this morning stares back at me. The pretty Asian girl is standing next to her, and her white sweater has a big stain across the front.

“Who are you?” Kat demands.

“I’m Mary.” I swallow hard. “Nice to meet you.”

Kat says, dryly, “You too.”

“What are your names?”

This seems to catch them both off guard. “I’m Kat, and this is Princess Lillia.”

The Asian girl gives her a dirty look. “It’s just Lillia.” Then she narrows her eyes on me. “Why are you hiding in here?”

“Umm . . . no reason.” It’s hard to look her in the eye, since I’ve been listening to her crying for the last ten minutes. It doesn’t seem right, someone so pretty and popular should have anything to cry about. Whatever it is, it must be bad.

Lillia flicks her hair over her shoulder. “You’re obviously upset about something. Or maybe you just enjoy spying on people in bathrooms?”

Kat slouches against the open door. “Let me guess. You hooked up with some guy over the summer. You let him feel you up, and now he doesn’t even remember your name.”

“Not even close,” I say, and bite down on my lip. I’m not sure I should tell these girls anything. After all, Lillia is in Reeve’s circle. She’s friends with him. And Kat . . . well, she’s just scary. “I saw someone I used to know. That’s all.”

“Who?” Kat says. I can tell by the way she slouches against the door that she’s not going to let me leave until I tell her.

“This guy. He . . . used to torture me when we were in seventh grade. He basically got everyone in our grade to hate me. He’s the reason my family moved away. Anyway, I saw him today, for the first time in four years, and he didn’t even recognize me. After everything he did.” Some of my hair slips into my face. I push it behind my ear.

“How old are you?” Lillia asks me, quieter and softer this time.

“Seventeen.”

Kat asks, “And you’re originally from the island? Which middle school did you go to?”

“I’m from here, but I went to Belle Harbor Montessori, on the mainland.” I used to ride the ferry every day to school and back. Me and him.

Kat shakes her head and says, “Reeve.”

My eyes widen. I’m nervous that she figured it out so fast, but I’m also strangely comforted. “How did you know?”

“Who else could it be?” Kat says, holding to the stall door open for me. “We go way back.”

I climb down. Lillia moves back over to the sink and wets a paper towel. “I’m not surprised. Reeve’s basically a Neanderthal,” she says, dabbing her front. “He ruined my sweater.”

Tentatively, I say, “I thought you guys were friends. I saw you together this morning.”

Lillia sighs. “We’re not friends, but we’re not
not
friends.”

Kat rolls her eyes. “Great answer, Lillia.”

Right away I say, “Please don’t tell him you saw me.” The last thing I want is to have Reeve hear that I’m still crying over him.

The bell rings, and Lillia pulls a tube of cherry ChapStick out of her shorts pocket and rubs it on her bottom lip. She presses her lips together with a pop. “Don’t sweat it. I’ve already forgotten your name.” She looks at Kat and says, “Gotta run,” and then walks out.

Kat watches her go, and when the door swings closed, she says to me in a low voice, “Hey. So, Lillia
was
crying, right?”

I look at my sandals. That’s private. I shouldn’t even have been in here.

“Did you hear her say anything? What was she upset about?”

“No. Nothing.”

Kat sighs, disappointed. “Where are you supposed to be right now, Mary?”

“I don’t even know.”

“Where’s your schedule?”

I look in my bag, but I can’t find it. “Um, I think I have chemistry now.”

She pushes her bangs out of her eyes and peers at me. “Wait, aren’t you a senior? Why haven’t you taken chemistry yet?”

I wet my lips. “I got really sick at the end of seventh grade, so I was held back a year.”

“That sucks. Well, the science department is over on the east side of the building. You’re going to have to book it over there to make it in time.” She pauses. “Listen, don’t let that jackhole Reeve get to you. Karma’s a bitch. He’ll get his.”

“I don’t know,” I say. “I mean, I wish I could believe it. But Reeve seems fine. I’m the one who’s been hiding in the bathroom all morning.”

“He’s not worth it,” she says. “None of these people are. Trust me.”

Gratefully I say, “Thanks, Kat.” She’s the first person to really talk to me today.

I follow Kat out of the bathroom. She makes a left and heads down the hall. I watch her go, discreetly, in case she might look back at me.

She doesn’t.

CHAPTER SIX

LILLIA

A
LL OF THE GIRLS TRYING OUT FOR THE SQUAD ARE
sitting on the football field bleachers in their short shorts and camis. Nadia is in the first row with a couple of her friends. I smile at her, and Nadia gives me a small smile back. I’m relieved she’s not still upset about my back handspring comment.

Rennie’s standing with Coach Christy in front of the girls, while Ashlin and I sit on the sidelines. We’ve got our uniforms on, like models. Rennie, too. Sleeveless shells with a
J
sewn on the chest, pleated skirts with bloomers underneath, and the ankle socks with the tiny colored balls on the heels. I have to admit, it feels kind of good to be wearing my uniform again.

When Coach Christy runs back to the gym office to photocopy permission slips, Rennie springs into action. Surveying the bleachers, she says in a low voice, “Okay, here’s the real deal. If you want to be a Jar Island varsity cheerleader, you have to look and act the part
full-time.
You’re not just representing yourself; you’re representing me. This is my squad. I have standards.” She pauses for effect. “Fingers crossed, we’re getting new uniforms this season, and they’re gonna be crop tops. That means I don’t want to see one French fry on anyone’s plate at lunch. I’m serious. Also, Dori.” Dori looks up, startled. “You need to retire that jacket. It makes you look like a soccer mom.”

I gasp, and Ashlin giggles behind her hand.

The girls whisper to each other nervously. Rennie looks over her shoulder to make sure Coach Christy isn’t on her way back outside, and she snaps, “Did I say I was finished?”

Everyone hushes up.

“There can’t be any weak links whatsoever. That means if your friend is slacking, you let her know. Like, just as a for instance, Melanie, you need to commit these three words to memory stat: ‘cleanse,’ ‘tone,’ ‘moisturize.’” Melanie’s eyes fill up with tears, but she quickly nods.

I honestly can’t believe what I’m hearing. I mean, okay, Melanie has bad skin, but does Rennie need to blow up her spot in front of everyone? I look over at Ashlin, hoping for solidarity, but she shrugs and whispers, “Forget the three steps. Send the girl to a dermatologist.”

Rennie points a finger at Nadia. “I want everyone to check out Nadia’s legs. That’s the level of tan you need to have. If you don’t, go see Becky at Mystic Beach on Sandtrap Street. She’ll hook you up.”

My sister flushes with pride and lowers her head humbly.

“And I’m not just talking to the freshmen.” I see Rennie scan the sophomores and juniors, who are here too. I know exactly who she’s looking for. Teresa Cruz. “Don’t get too comfortable just because you’re an upperclassman. Every girl has to earn her spot here. I will not hesitate to cut any dead weight for the good of the squad.”

I see Coach Christy come out the metal doors, so I clear my throat and motion for Rennie to wrap it up.

Finally she smiles. “Last chance, girls. If you don’t think you can hang, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.”

No one makes a move.

*   *   *

In the locker room it’s just Rennie and me changing out of our uniforms. Ashlin and Coach Christy have the other girls running around the track.

I’m pulling my sweater over my head as I say, “So we’re going straight to Alex’s now, right? He was pretty upset today at lunch.”

“Over what?”

“Over the fact that we left the party.” At the mention of the party, Rennie’s face goes blank. “I told him we’d come over after practice to take down the decorations and straighten up the pool house.”

“Will Reeve be there?”

Sourly I say, “I hope not.” I bend down and take off my sneakers.

“You know how today at lunch Reeve was going on and on about who his cheerleader should be?” When I don’t reply, she keeps talking. “I think that was his slick way of asking me. I mean, it makes total sense, right? Captain for captain.”

I pull my hair into a ponytail. “But wasn’t he hooking up with Teresa Cruz a bunch this summer?”

Rennie laughs dryly. “Um, they hooked up, like, twice. Besides, have you seen her thighs? She can barely cross her legs, much less do splits. You really think Reeve would want her repping his number out there?”

“I don’t know.” I tighten my ponytail.

“You don’t know?”

“I think Teresa’s pretty.” Rennie gives me a look like I’m crazy, but I ignore it. “So you’re coming with me, right?”

Rennie rolls her eyes. “Lindy has a maid. He doesn’t need us.”

“You’re not supposed to say ‘maid’—”

“Please, no lectures on rich people terminology!” she snaps, putting her cami back on.

My heart is thumping in my chest as I take off my socks and put on my espadrilles. Rennie won’t even look at me as she packs up the rest of her things. “Ren, I know you’re still upset about what happened with Kat this morning—”

I don’t even get to finish. Rennie levels me with a death stare and says, “I couldn’t care less about that freak.” then she walks out of the locker room, without saying good-bye.

By the time I get to the parking lot, her Jeep is long gone. I end up tracking down Ashlin for a ride to Alex’s.

*   *   *

Ash drops me off outside Alex’s house. I let out a big sigh of relief because Mrs. Lind’s car isn’t in the driveway. I was hoping she wouldn’t be home, because what if she’s mad at me too?

Unbuckling my seat belt, I say, “Thanks for the ride, Ash.”

“No prob, Lils. I’m just sorry I can’t help you clean up.” She makes a sad face and says, “I promised my mom I would go with her to get her hair cut. Last time they totally made her look like an old lady.”