Bungalow 2 (17 page)

“I'm surprised you even bother to come home anymore,” Alice teased her. “It's mighty dull around here compared to all that.”

“Don't be stupid,” Tanya growled at her. “I'd much rather be here with Peter and the kids. It's all fantasyland down there. Nothing is real.”

“Sounds real enough to me,” Alice said with open admiration. She was happy for her friend that her career was going so well, and she was having this experience, and she assured her that her children were doing fine. She calmed all of Tanya's fears that they would never forgive her. Alice said that even Megan spoke of her with pride, which came as a surprise to her mother.

“She hardly talks to me anymore. She's been mad since last summer.” Tanya was relieved by what Alice had just said. She was around the girls a lot more than Tanya was these days, and seemed to know their state of mind better, so Tanya trusted what she said.

“She's not as mad as she wants you to think. She's just punishing you for a while. Don't pay any attention to her, she'll back off.” Tanya was pleased to hear it and mentioned it to Peter when she went home. He agreed.

“She's just putting you through hoops. She's been fine around here,” he reassured her, and when Megan came home a little while later, Tanya smiled at her as though everything were fine between them. She asked Megan something inane about school, and Megan glared at her as though she had offended her again. She was even angrier when her mother suggested they start doing her college applications together. Megan said she wanted to do them with Alice, which was a slap in Tanya's face, which really hurt her. It was an indisputable rejection. “I'd like to at least look at them with you,” her mother said gently, and Megan flatly refused to. “Maybe next time I come home,” Tanya said hopefully, and Megan shrugged in answer.

“Whatever,” she said and stomped upstairs, as Tanya's heart ached, and she tried not to let it upset her. At least Molly wanted to do hers with her mother, and had already shown Tanya several essays.

“I guess I haven't finished my hoops course yet,” she said to Peter with a rueful look and he grinned.

The first weekend in October Tanya came home, as did Jason from UCSB, and they all went to the World Series. It was between the Giants and the Red Sox, and the games were terrific. The Giants were winning when she flew back to L.A. with Jason. She sent him back to Santa Barbara in her limo, which he thought was embarrassing but cool. The whole family truly enjoyed spending their time together.

And the second weekend in October, Peter and the girls flew to L.A. and stayed at the bungalow with her. The girls loved it, and Jason came down on Saturday for the day. He stayed until after dinner.

Tanya and the girls went shopping on Melrose, and they all had lunch at Fred Segal's. She took them to some funny little shops she'd found, and they had a ball, while Peter and Jason lay around the pool, and Jason admired the women. They had dinner at Spago and ran into Jean Amber, whom the twins thought was gorgeous. She had given Tanya a big hug and made a fuss over Megan and Molly, and she flirted with Jason. He was blushing when she walked away. They were all overwhelmed at meeting her.

“I'll introduce you to Ned Bright the next time you come down, after we start the film,” Tanya promised. Shortly after, another hot star walked in, and all three kids stared in disbelief. They went back to the hotel afterward, and had a drink at the bar, Cokes for the kids since they were minors, and several more stars walked in. Tanya didn't know them, but the kids recognized them. By the time the girls got back to the bungalow, they couldn't believe all the stars they'd seen. They were both squealing with excitement. Jason had just gone back to school in his mother's limo again.

“Wow, Mom, this is so cool!” Molly said with wide eyes, and for the first time in ages, Megan hugged her and was smiling, too.

“Thanks, Mom, for bringing us down here,” Megan said generously. Alice was right. All was nearly forgiven. The weekend in L.A. had clinched it. They missed having her at home, but they had to admit, this was a lot of fun. They could hardly wait to do it again, and meet Ned Bright and the other stars.

The one who seemed less enthralled with it was Peter, who looked somewhat daunted when the girls disappeared into their room, giggling, and he and Tanya went to bed in theirs. He looked tired. It had been a long day, and he'd had a long week. They had settled a tough case.

“Are you okay, sweetheart?” she asked, rubbing his back when they got into bed.

“Just tired.” The day hadn't been as much fun for him as it had been for his daughters, and he had hardly seen Tanya all day. She'd been busy shopping with the girls. And all the stars they'd seen didn't mean anything to him. He didn't know who most of them were, they were mostly actors and actresses who were cult figures to kids, not adults, although even he knew who Jean Amber was, and admitted readily that she was gorgeous. And she seemed to be crazy about Tanya. She acted like they were best friends. But only because they were working on a picture together now. It would all be forgotten in six months. Tanya had no illusions about that.

Peter looked at her as they lay in bed together, and Tanya was upset to see him look sad. “How are you ever going to come back to Ross after all this, Tan? We can't compete with your life here.”

“You don't have to,” she said quietly. “You win the contest hands down. This means nothing to me. It's just exciting to do the work. I don't give a damn about the life.”

“You think that now,” he said, looking at her. “You've only been here for six weeks. Wait till you've been here for a while. Look at how you're living. You have your own limo, you live at the Beverly Hills Hotel in your own bungalow, stars crawl all over you. This is heady stuff, Tan. It's addictive. Ross is going to look like Kansas to you in another six months.” He looked seriously worried.

“Kansas is what I want,” she said firmly. “I want us. I love our life. I couldn't live here on a bet. It would drive me nuts.”

“I don't know, Cinderella. When the coach turns into a pumpkin again, it could be tough.”

“I'm turning in my glass slippers the day we finish the film, and I'm coming home. And that's it. This was a one-time deal, not a way of life. I wouldn't trade what we have for anything in the world.”

“Tell me that in seven months. I hope you still feel that way then.” It upset her that he was thinking about it, and she was still sad after they made love. There was something subdued about him, as though he felt defeated, and unable to compete with her new life. His fear was exactly what Douglas had said, that her life in L.A. would be addictive and she would never want to go back. Alice had said it too the last time Tanya was in Ross. What were they all talking about? Didn't they get it? She wanted to go home when it was over, not stay here. That seemed like a very bad trade to her. But Peter acted as though he didn't believe her. He still looked unhappy, and he was quiet the next morning when they went to the Ivy for brunch.

The girls looked happy on the terrace, particularly when Leonardo Di Caprio sat at the next table and smiled at them. And Peter warmed up a little after they ate. Tanya sat close to him, held his hand, hugged him, and kissed him every chance she got. She couldn't get enough of him. She missed him so much when she was in L.A. But he didn't seem to believe that she preferred her old life. All she could do was prove it to him, when the movie ended and she went back. It annoyed her that everyone was so convinced she'd want to stay. She knew better than that, even if they didn't. And the only one she cared about thinking that was Peter. She didn't want him worrying about her falling in love with her so-called new life. It wasn't a new life in her mind, it was just a visit, a sabbatical she was taking in L.A., for the sake of her career. She had no other interest in it.

They went back to the hotel after lunch and hung out at the pool for a while. The girls swam while Peter and Tanya lay on lounge chairs and talked. He ordered a screwdriver, which was unusual for him, and Tanya was still worried about him. She had the feeling that he was panicked about her. The less he said, the more upset she felt.

“I'm coming home when this is all over, sweetheart. I don't like it here. I'm here to work, and that's it. I love our life in Marin.”

“You think that now, Tan. But you'll be bored out of your mind there after this. And the girls will be gone next year. You'll have nothing to do.”

“I'll have you,” she said gently. “And our life. My writing. This isn't a life here, Peter. It's a joke. I just wanted the experience of doing a screenplay for a movie. You're the one who told me to do it.” She reminded him of that, and he nodded, but he was sorry now he had. He was only just beginning to realize the risk he had taken. He looked worried all the time.

“It scares me now, Tan. For us. I just can't see you feeling the same about anything after this is over.” He looked near tears as he said it, and she was shocked. She had never seen him look so shaken.

“How shallow do you think I am?” she asked unhappily. “Why do you think I come home on weekends? Because I love it there, and I love you. That's my home. This is my job.”

“Okay,” he said, taking a breath, wanting to believe her. He thought she meant what she was saying. He just didn't know how long she would feel like that. Sooner or later the life she was living here would get to her, he thought, and it would dawn on her that the world was her oyster, and her old life in Marin wasn't enough. He didn't want that to happen, but he couldn't imagine now that it wouldn't. He hadn't fully understood until then what her life would be like in L.A. while working on the movie. It was a lot more glamorous than he had thought. It was hard to compete with all that.

The girls got out of the pool and joined them then, and they couldn't pursue the conversation, which was just as well. They were going around in circles, and Tanya could see that Peter still wasn't convinced. Time would prove everything she was saying to him, but in the meantime he was a lot more worried now than he had been. She put her arms around him and held him close to her when they were back in her room in the bungalow.

“I love you, Peter,” she said softly. “More than anything.” He kissed her, and Tanya clung to him for a long moment. She didn't want him to go. The girls walked into the room then and reminded them that they had to leave for the airport soon. Tanya felt as though the weekend had reassured them and frightened Peter. She could see in his eyes that what he had seen there had disturbed him profoundly. He was quiet on the way to the airport, and looked distracted when he kissed her goodbye.

“I love you,” she reminded him again.

“I love you, too, Tan,” he said, smiling sadly. “Don't fall in love with it down here, I need you,” he whispered. He looked so vulnerable it almost made her cry.

“I won't,” she promised him. “You're all I want. I'll be home Friday.” And she knew that this time, no matter what happened, she had to go home for the weekend. She wanted him to know that no matter what happened down here, who she met or what she saw, or how appealing they tried to make it, above all, and more important to her than anything, she was his wife.

Chapter 9

T
anya went home, as promised, for the next two weekends, and Peter seemed to calm down. The fact that she came home every Friday night, as they had planned for her to do, seemed to reassure him. He admitted that the weekend in L.A. had unnerved him, but as soon as he saw her in Marin again, he felt sane. The life she led in L.A. wasn't one he wanted to be part of. And she continued to try to convince him that neither did she. All she wanted was the thrill of writing a feature film, and after that she was coming home. Life seemed almost normal again when she came up every weekend. She missed two important meetings to do it, but she said nothing about it to him. She told Douglas and Max that she just couldn't stay. She said she had to get home to her kids. They didn't like it, but as long as they hadn't started shooting yet, they were willing to let her go.

They started shooting on the first of November, and from then on her life was insane. They shot days, nights, location scenes, worked on soundstages they had rented, and sat in folding chairs on street corners during night shoots, while she worked frantically on the script to make changes. She was winging it a lot of the time. Jean proved to be difficult to work with, while Ned was a dream. She could never remember her lines, and wanted Tanya to adjust them for her. Tanya worked closely with Max on every scene, while Douglas came and went and observed frequently.

The first weekend after shooting started, she miraculously managed to go home. And if anything happened on the set, she promised to be available on the phone. She assured them she could make changes from there, and send them by e-mail. But for the next two weekends after that, there was no way she could go. Four scenes had to be rewritten, they were shooting out of sequence, and they were tackling some of the most difficult scenes in the film. Max promised her that she could take weekends off later, but for now he needed her right there. She had no choice. The girls were unhappy about it and Peter didn't sound pleased either, but he understood it, or said he did. He was starting a trial in a few weeks, and was buried at the office, too.

Tanya hadn't been home for two weeks when she got home for Thanksgiving, and she almost cried with relief when she walked in the front door. It was Wednesday afternoon, and Peter had just bought everything they needed for Thanksgiving. Her flight had been delayed for two hours due to bad weather, and she had been panicked she wouldn't get home. Jason was due home that night. He was driving up with friends. Alice's son James was driving up from Santa Barbara that weekend, too.

“God, am I glad to see you guys,” Tanya said, as she set down her bag in the kitchen. “I thought they were going to cancel my flight.” She felt as though she hadn't seen them in a million years, and it had only been two weeks. Peter looked thrilled to see her, and walked over to her to give her a hug.

“We're happy to see you, too,” Peter said as the girls helped him unpack the groceries. He had bought everything Tanya had told him to. She was going to start cooking their turkey before dawn the next morning. It was huge.