Bullet (10 page)

“Hell, yeah.”

“Yeah…and it’s taken.”

Brad snarled.  “So?  I’ve never heard of ‘
em, so what?”

“Do you
really
want somebody’s sloppy seconds?”

Brad started laughing.  “Fuck…not when you put it that way.”

“Exactly.  So…close your eyes and tell me…what do you think of
Fully Automatic
?”

Brad and Nick were quiet, so quiet. 
No
.  I was sure that meant they hated it.  But then Nick nodded his head.  Brad was the wild card, though.  After a few moments, he said, “Yeah…that’ll work.”

“You don’t sound convinced.”

“I just need some time to try it on…know what I mean?”

“Yeah,” Ethan said, “that’s cool
, man.”

Brad slapped him on the back.  “Damn straight.”

“So let’s work out this next song.”  They spent the next two hours perfecting a song they’d been working on.  I hadn’t really noticed any of their lyrics before, but I was able to hear these in scrutinizing detail.  And, because their sound was so rockin’, there was no way I was going to criticize their lyrics…but they weren’t deep, and they sounded pretty cliché.  There weren’t any sentiments in the words I hadn’t heard dozens of times before.  I had gathered from what Ethan had told me before that usually he and Brad wrote their own lyrics to the songs they sang, but this one wound up being a collaboration.  I just sat back and listened to them work things out.  They got the music down first—solo included—and then started writing the lyrics.

“Down on my knees…how’s that?”

Ethan said, “Yeah, yeah…that’s good, and it rhymes with
me
too.”

Brad nodded. 
Zane and Nick were working on percussion, trying to perfect the rhythm of the song while Brad and Ethan sat on two other lawn chairs.  I sat next to them both, keeping my mouth shut.

Then Ethan said, “Oh…this is better:  ‘I’m begging you please’.”

“Yeah.”

Oh, God…I couldn’t help it anymore.  I’d been quiet long enough.  “Um…guys…can I give you a suggestion?”

Oh, shit.  It had come out of my mouth.  I hadn’t been able to stop it.  Both of them grew quiet and looked at me.  Ethan said, “Uh…sure.”

I took a deep breath.  They were my friends, and there was nothing wrong with constructive criticism, right?  Especially if it was given with care.  At least that’s what I told myself, so I moved forward.  I didn’t want to be harsh or mean, so I just said, “Your music is awesome.  It’s so original.  Some of the words here, though…they’re kind of…”

“Generic.”  Thank goodness Brad said it before I had to.  I just nodded my head.  “Yeah, you’re right.”  He looked at Ethan and then back to me.  “Any ideas?”

Oh, double shit.  I couldn’t think on the fly.  I just knew unoriginal when I heard it.  I felt like a ladybug under a magnifying glass.  But then it came to me.  “Your words are a knife that twist with every breath.”

Ethan smiled.  Then he looked skeptical as he started to say, “That’s—”

“Wow.  Not perfect, but…I like the metaphor.”

Oh, great.  Like Brad needed to look even better to me than he already did.  But it couldn’t be helped.  He scored points with me—not because he liked my words, but because he knew what a metaphor was.

“Do you care if I use it…even if we change it a bit?”

“No…please.”  Ethan didn’t seem too thrilled about it, but he and Brad started working around the knife metaphor and wound up completely changing the words.  Suddenly, though, with just that one little suggestion, the words became riddled with meaning, and not just superficial dribble.  It was no longer a bunch of words I’d heard a million times before.  It went from being okay to being pretty special.  And by the time they were done, even Ethan was happy.

Brad’s mom popped in the garage to say
goodbye
.  Brad introduced me to her.  I guessed she was a nurse because she was wearing scrubs.  She kissed Brad on the cheek and then she noticed me.  “I thought it was just the boys tonight.”

“Oh, mom, this is Ethan and
Zane’s friend from college—Valerie Quinn.”  Wow.  He’d remembered my last name too.

“Nice to meet you, Valerie.  I’m Barbara.  Now, Brad, there’s some leftover turkey and mashed potatoes in the fridge.  I wouldn’t complain if you all ate it.  Just put the dishes in the dishwasher, please.”

“Thanks, Mrs. P.”

“I need to hurry.  Apparently, there are already three women checked in who will probably give birth tonight during my shift.  So don’t worry if I’m home later than usual.”

“I won’t, mom.”

“Have fun.  Oh, and there are some DVDs in the living room if you want to watch a movie.”

Well, the guys were all over having some chow and watching a horror movie, so we went to the kitchen where everyone pitched in.  We sat at the table and ate, and I almost thought they’d forgotten about the bottle of rum in the garage.  But as we were rinsing plates and loading the dishwasher, Brad snuck off, returning shortly after with the bottle.  Ethan had only been helping half-heartedly and was off in the corner.  It looked like he was texting something.  If he was interested in me at all, he wasn’t doing a very good job showing it.  Brad, on the other hand, wasn’t doing a good job staying off my radar.

We retired to the living room, and someone put in a horror movie.  It looked like just another horror movie, and none of us were really watching.  Brad had brought out one of the twelve-packs and the bottle of rum.  He’d had Nick help by bringing in five glasses filled with ice.  Brad poured rum in four of the glasses and then looked at me.  “Sure you don’t want just a little?  Just enough to get a little buzz?”

His eyes were so warm, so persuasive.  Ethan sat up straight on the couch and leaned over, so close I could feel him.  As though challenging Brad, he said to me, “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

But I trusted Brad, and there was something in his eyes that made me want to say
yes
.  So I said, “Sure…just a little, though.  I’m the driver, remember?”

He chuckled.  “Okay.”  So he poured just a tiny amount in my glass, at least two-thirds less than what he’d poured in everyone else’s
cup.  Then he poured Coke in each one until the liquid almost touched the rim.

Brad slid the glasses to a position in
front of each person.  “Bottoms up.”  All four of the men drank half of their glass in one gulp.

“You shouldn’t have put ice in ‘
em, Bradley.  It’s harder to drink.”  Ethan smirked at his friend.

“I thought, since we were in the company of a lady, that we should show a little restraint.”  I felt myself blush a little.

“Yeah.  Whatever.  Top me off, pussy.”

Brad’s sense of humor seemed to be dissipating.  He handed Ethan the bottle.  “Do it yourself, cocksucker.”

“Don’t mind if I do.”

At that point, we
did
start watching the movie.  I’d felt a little tense at the exchange between the two alpha males in the room, but as they downed their drinks, their emotions seemed to die down as well.

It didn’t escape my notice that Brad moved to the other side of me on the couch…and he sat close enough that his leg touched mine.

But Ethan kept talking to me, just making fun of the movie, making me laugh.  Nick was on the floor in front of the coffee table, and once in a while, he’d catch a snippet of Ethan’s jokes and bust out laughing.  He was getting pretty wasted.  Zane was in a chair on the other side of the room.

I hadn’t had much of my drink.  I guessed I just wasn’t much of a drinker.  And that was okay.  Ethan sat up and grabbed a Coke, popping it open.  He sat back on the couch and whispered.  “How about you trade me your drink for a straight Coke?”

I felt a little relief, and my heart warmed to my sweet Ethan.  He must have just sensed that I wasn’t comfortable drinking, and he was going to rescue me.  I smiled and switched with him.  All the ice in my glass had melted, so he slammed it in just a couple of gulps.  He licked his lips and looked me straight in the eye.  “Best one I’ve had all night.”

Was he just teasing me?  He winked and then leaned forward again, this time pouring more rum in his glass but foregoing the Coke.

Nick started giggling.  “Oh, shit.  This girl’s gonna get killed.”

Zane
said, “Yeah…we saw her tits five minutes ago.  Of course, she’s gonna die.”

The girl in the film had been jogging through the woods but then discovered she was being followed by the
slasher in the movie.  It was the same old tired scenario we’d all seen in horror movies, a formula beloved by the many.  The girl tripped and started screaming, panicking, and just being stupid in general.  I sat up.  “Why is it that they always make these girls so dumb?  Why does she have to trip and act stupid?  Instead of going back the way she came or following the trail, she’s disappearing deeper into the woods where she’s going to die.”

Normally quiet Nick was now Obnoxious Nick.  “You have a problem with that?”

Zane said, “I don’t, as long as I get to see her goodies.”

I rolled my eyes.  “Real girls aren’t like that.”

Brad sat up next to me and put his arm around my shoulders.  “Know what, Val?  You’re cool.  Ethan has class when it comes to women.”

I wasn’t sure where he was coming from, but I couldn’t believe he was putting his arm around me right in front of Ethan.

“Correction,” Zane interrupted.  “Remember Mary…
the mouth
?”

“Oh, fuck, yeah!”  Nick broke out into laughter and fell on his back.

Ethan said, “Can we change the subject?”

“I
kinda liked her mouth,” Zane said.

“I just wanted to say Val was cool.  I didn’t want to get you guys started talking about
Ethan’s old girlfriends.”

Ethan slammed his straight rum and poured another. 
Zane said, “I want a girlfriend like that.”

“Shut the fuck up, man.”

Zane sighed and shrugged, then downed his drink.  Brad seemed to be in his own little world.  I’d tried to ignore his arm around me, and I certainly didn’t want to draw attention to it nor encourage it.  But he started talking quietly, so no one else could hear.  “I’m glad you and Ethan are friends.”  I couldn’t ignore him anymore, and I turned my head to look at him.

Holy Christ.  The look in his eyes was undeniable.  He wasn’t drunk, no.  He might’ve been loosened up, but he wasn’t trashed.  He looked…sexy, and I had no idea why he liked me so much, but the feeling was mutual.

I heard Nick laughing at something on the TV, and Zane said, “Holy shit!  That bitch can
bleed
!”  I hoped no one else was paying attention to me.

Brad asked, “So…are you and Ethan dating or not?  Are you boyfriend and girlfriend?  He won’t say dick about it, and I can’t tell.”

God…how should I answer that?  Honesty…always the best way.  “I…uh…don’t think he considers us that.”

Still…I really cared for Ethan
, and nothing was set in stone.  Until I knew for sure, I didn’t want to encourage Brad’s behavior.  I took a deep breath and tried to smile.  Then I stood up.  “I…um…need a glass of water.  Can I get anyone anything?”

Brad shook his head
, and everyone else ignored me, so I walked to the kitchen.

I was so glad I hadn’t had anything to drink. 
In the past, I’d been around friends who’d lost all their inhibitions too quickly thanks to alcohol, and I knew I’d just escaped a precarious situation.

I’d
come to the kitchen to get my bearings.  I stood at the refrigerator for a good two minutes, just staring at the handle.  Finally, I opened the door so I wouldn’t look pathetic and lost, but that’s really what I was.  I was confused.  I didn’t know what I wanted, and it made me angry.  No, that wasn’t entirely true.  My head wanted one thing, my heart another.  I needed a few minutes alone to just think.

A few deep breaths and I was starting to feel normal
again.  I shut the refrigerator door and turned around, ready to go back to the living room.  But just as I did that, he appeared in the doorway.  Brad…the man who’d made me question everything.  And he just stared at me with those smoldering eyes as if to say he knew everything I was thinking.

Like a deer caught in headlights, I froze.  I was paralyzed.  I felt my heartbeat speed up, as though a locomotive were driving it.  Thump-thump, thump-thump, thump-thump.  I could hear it in my ears and nothing else.  And then he started moving across the kitchen, closing the gap between us until it was nonexistent.  I could hear as each one of his boots hit the floor
step by step, but I was helpless to move.  I felt a jolt in my bloodstream as my brain flooded it with chemicals, and yet I still couldn’t move.

Brad stopped just millimeters away from my body
, and my eyes stayed locked on his.  The thudding in my chest hadn’t receded, and there was no way I was getting away.  I drew in one deep breath through my slightly parted lips, then another.  Neither of us said a word.  And then I felt something inside decide that it would be okay.  Honestly, I knew there was nothing between Ethan and me, just some stupid stalkerish emotion that made me feel like I loved him.  And that’s when I decided I wanted to give in to whatever had gripped me, whatever it was inside me that was drawn to Brad.  My breathing slowed just a little, and I noticed his head tilt down as though he was going to touch my lips with his.  Yes.  It was okay.  Maybe.