Authors: Yu Hua
Song Gang answered with a sneeze, "Lin Hongs letter."
When Baldy Li heard this, he half got out of bed and very carefully unrolled the ball of paper. The ink had bled, creating an indistinct landscape painting. Baldy Li immediately jumped out of bed, stood on the table, and placed the unfolded note under the bright lightbulb. Even after the bulb had dried it, Baldy Li still couldn't make out what it said and so he had no choice but to ask Song Gang, "What did Lin Hong write?"
Already in bed, with his eyes closed, Song Gang said, "Turn off the light."
Baldy Li quickly did, then lay down in his own bed. With the two
brothers each in their respective beds, Song Gong, amid spasms of coughing and sneezing, narrated in fits and starts the events of that evening. Baldy Li listened silently, and after Song Gang was finished he whispered, "Song Gang."
Song Gang replied with a "Huh?" and Baldy Li carefully asked, "You didn't escort Lin Hong home?"
Song Gang wheezed, "No."
Baldy Li smiled silently in the darkness and again said softly, "Song Gang." Song Gang once again replied with a "Huh?" Then Baldy Li said earnestly, "You really are a good brother."
Song Gang didn't respond, and Baldy Li called out his name several times until Song Gang finally replied, "I want to go to sleep."
Song Gang spent the entire rainy night coughing and sleeping fitfully. While sleeping, he felt befuddled, as if he were still under water. While awake, he felt that he couldn't breathe, as if there were a heavy stone resting on his chest. When the morning light finally streamed in his window, he opened his eyes and realized that he had actually fallen asleep. Song Gang saw that it was a clear morning after a night full of rain. The eaves were still dripping, and rivulets were running down the outside of the window, but the room was bathed in bright sunlight. Outside, sparrows were singing and the neighbors chatted loudly with each other. Song Gang sighed, having made it through the difficult night. This beautiful morning made him happy and at ease. He sat up in bed and saw that Baldy Li was still sleeping soundly, so he called out, as was their custom, "Baldy Li, Baldy Li! Time to get up!"
Baldy Li's head poked out from under the covers, and Song Gang laughed. Baldy Li rubbed his eyes, not sure what Song Gang found so funny. Song Gang explained that Baldy Li looked like a turtle sticking its head out. He then acted out the motions, covering himself with blankets and then, with a muffled voice, asking Baldy Li if he looked like a turtle. Then he suddenly poked his head out and held it there. Baldy Li rubbed his eyes and laughed, saying, "You do! You really do look like a turtle."
Later Baldy Li remembered the events of the previous night and looked at Song Gang with surprise. Song Gang, acting as if nothing had happened, jumped out of bed and got a clean set of clothes from the closet. He then put some toothpaste on his toothbrush, picked up his cup and basin, threw his hand towel over his shoulder, and walked to
the well to wash his face and brush his teeth. Baldy Li heard Song Gang chatting with several neighbors over by the well, occasionally emitting bursts of laughter. Baldy Li scratched his head suspiciously and cursed, "Fuck."
Song Gang had a peaceful day, occasionally remembering the previous nights incidents under the bridge and in the river, as well as the image of the soaked Lin Hong walking up the road. These memories left him momentarily shaken, but he immediately recovered his equilibrium and did not dwell on them. After his difficult night, Song Gang had finally achieved some peace. The life-or-death experience with Lin Hong the previous night was like the conclusion of a story, and this story, which had taken his breath away, was now over, and a new story could begin. As the sun follows rain, Song Gangs mood brightened.
After work that afternoon, Baldy Li brought home some big red apples. Song Gang had already prepared dinner, and Baldy Li, with a grin, placed the apples on the bench, then laughed mischievously throughout dinner. Baldy Li's laugh disquieted Song Gang, because he didn't know what Baldy Li was plotting. After dinner, Baldy Li suddenly announced that he had gone to the knitting factory to investigate and discovered that Lin Hong had not shown up at work because she was sick with a fever, having spent the entire day in bed. Baldy Li tapped the table with his finger and said, "You should go to her house immediately."
Astonished, Song Gang looked suspiciously at Baldy Li and then at the apples, thinking that Baldy Li wanted him to take the apples to Lin Hong. Song Gang shook his head and said, "I can't go, and even less can I take these apples."
"Who said anything about you taking the apples? The apples are for me to take." Baldy Li pounded the table and stood up. He handed Song Gang the handkerchief, which was now dry, and said, "This is what you should take with you, to return it to her."
Song Gang continued to watch Baldy Li suspiciously, still not knowing what he had up his sleeve. Baldy Li enthusiastically explained his plan. First Song Gang would take the handkerchief into Lin Hong's room while Baldy Li waited outside with his apples. When Song Gang walked up to Lin Hong's bed, he would stand there without saying a word, and when she awoke and saw him, he would say coldly, "This time you should give up all hope." He would throw the handkerchief
onto Lin Hongs bed and immediately turn and leave. After Song Gang emerged, it would be Baldy Li's turn to go in with the apples to console her. After Baldy Li finished explaining his plan, he wiped his spittle and said proudly, "This way Lin Hong s feelings for you will finally be extinguished and she will begin feeling true affection for me instead."
Song Gang bowed his head. Baldy Li was completely intoxicated by his master plan and excitedly asked Song Gang, "Is this not a truly diabolical plot?"
Seeing Song Gang sitting silently and with a bowed head, Baldy Li waved and said, "Okay, you should go."
Song Gang shook his head sadly, unwilling to go. He said, "I can't say what you're asking me to say."
Baldy Li was unhappy. Counting on his fingers, he said, "Just think of the five stratagems you suggested for me:
beating around the bush, coming straight to the point, laying siege at the outskirts of the city, penetrating behind enemy lines,
and
beating to a pulp.
Of those, not a single one was helpful. You have been completely useless as my military advisor. Therefore, it is now up to me to come up with a new diabolical plot."
Having said this, Baldy Li lifted his thumb and pointed out the door. "Go, quick."
Song Gang still shook his head. Biting his lip, he said, "I really can't say what you want me to say."
"Fuck!" Baldy Li exclaimed. "Song Gang, we are brothers. Can't you help me this once? I swear that this will be the last time. I'll never again ask for your help."
As he was saying this Baldy Li pulled Song Gang from his seat and pushed him out the door. He stuffed the handkerchief into Song Gang's hand and himself picked up the apples. Then the brothers headed to Lin Hong's house. At this point it was dusk, and the street was bathed in a damp mist. Baldy Li walked happily in front with the apples in his hand, and Song Gang followed with the handkerchief and a heavy heart. The entire way, Baldy Li tirelessly gave Song Gang words of encouragement, offering him one blank check after another. He promised that after he and Lin Hong became a couple, the first thing he would do would be to help Song Gang find a girlfriend even prettier than Lin Hong. If such a woman couldn't be found in Liu, he would search the surrounding towns, and if she couldn't be found there, he would go to the city to look for her. If she couldn't be found in
the city, he would search the entire province, and if she couldn't be found in the province, he would search the entire country. If she couldn't be found in China, he would search the entire world for her. Baldy Li laughed. "Perhaps I might end up finding you a blond, blue-eyed girlfriend. That way you could live in a Western house, eat Western food, sleep in a Western bed, hug a Western girl's waist, kiss a Western girl's lips, and give birth to a pair of mixed-race twins."
As Baldy Li was animatedly describing Song Gang's Western future, Song Gang walked with a bowed head along the thoroughly rustic street. He didn't hear a word of what Baldy Li was saying but simply followed mechanically behind him. When Baldy Li paused to chat with other passersby, Song Gang would also pause and stare confusedly at the setting sun. When Baldy Li set off again, Song Gang would again lower his head and follow him. When the people of Liu saw Baldy Li carrying the apples, they asked, "Are you going to visit a friend or a relative?"
"Why does it have to be either a friend or a relative?" Baldy Li retorted happily.
When they arrived at the entrance to Lin Hong's house, Baldy Li came to a halt and patted Song Gang's shoulder. "It's up to you! I'll wait here for news of your success."
Then Baldy Li added affectionately, in what amounted to his trump card, "Remember, we are brothers."
Song Gang watched Baldy Li's flushed face in the evening light, shook his head and laughed bitterly, then turned and walked into Lin Hong's home. When Song Gang abruptly showed up, Lin Hong's parents were in the middle of dinner. They were somewhat surprised to see him and obviously knew what had happened the previous evening. Song Gang felt that he should make a bit of conversation, but his mind was a complete blank. He merely stood there without saying anything, unable to step through the doorway, until finally Lin Hong's mother stood up and called out to him,"Come on in."
Song Gang finally stepped through the doorway, but after he walked to the center of the room, he didn't know what he should do next. Lin Hong's mother smiled as she opened the door to Lin Hong's bedroom, quietly telling Song Gang, "She might already be asleep."
Song Gang nodded expressionlessly and then walked into the bedroom, which was bathed in evening light. He saw Lin Hong asleep on the bed as peaceful as a kitten. He walked forward uncertainly a couple
of steps, until he was standing in front of her bed. The covers had fallen off, revealing the tender outline of her body, and her hair covering her pretty face. Song Gang felt the blood rush to his head and his pulse start racing. Sensing someone moving in front of her bed, Lin Hong half opened her eyes and smiled in pleasant surprise when she realized it was Song Gang. She closed her eyes again and grinned for a while, then opened them and extended her hand to him.
At this point Song Gang finally remembered what he was supposed to say to her. He took a deep breath and stuttered, "This time you should give up all hope."
Lin Hong shuddered as if she had been shot and stared at Song Gang with wide eyes. At that instant he saw the terror in her eyes, after which she closed them painfully, with tears running down her cheeks. His entire body shuddering, Song Gang placed the handkerchief on her covers, then rushed out of her room as if he were fleeing for his life. When he reached the door to the house, he seemed to hear Lin Hongs parents saying something, but after a moments hesitation he rushed out.
When Baldy Li saw Song Gang rush out as if he had seen a ghost, he delightedly asked him, "Did you succeed?"
Song Gang unhappily nodded his head, tears streaming down his face, then hurried away, determined never to look back. Baldy Li watched him leave and muttered, "What's he crying about?"
Then Baldy Li sauntered into Lin Hongs house, stroking his bald head as if he were combing his hair, and weighing the apples in his hand.
While Lin Hongs parents were trying to figure out what had just happened, Baldy Li sauntered in and greeted them as Auntie and Uncle, then continued on into Lin Hongs room. He turned around and closed her door, and as he did so he winked mysteriously at her parents. Both parents scratched their heads and stood there staring at each other.
Baldy Li smiled as he walked toward Lin Hongs bed and said, "Lin Hong, I heard that you were sick, so I bought you some apples."
Lin Hong, who had not yet recovered from the preceding shock, stared at Baldy Li with a look of utter incomprehension. He was secretly pleased that she was not kicking him out, and so he sat down on her bed and took the apples one after another, placing them next to her pillow, and bragged, "These are the reddest and biggest apples
Liu Town has ever seen. I went to three separate fruit stalls to find them."
Lin Hong was still staring speechlessly at Baldy Li, and Baldy Li felt as though he were on the verge of success. He tenderly grasped her right hand, caressing it and lifting it to his face. At this point she finally came to her senses, immediately pulled back her hand, and let out a bloodcurdling scream.
Lin Hongs parents heard the scream and rushed into her room. There they saw Lin Hong, huddled in the corner of the bed, pointing at Baldy Li and shouting, "Out! Get out of here!"
Without even having a chance to explain himself, Baldy Li again fled from Lin Hongs house. This time her parents didn't use broomsticks and feather dusters to kick him out but, rather, their own hands and fists. In front of all the assembled onlookers, they cursed Baldy Li again and again, using not only the "ugly toad" and "cow dung" curses from before but also adding "hooligan," "bum," and "bastard" to the mix.
Amid their curses, Lin Hongs parents finally remembered their daughter and rushed back into the house to see her. Baldy Li stood there resentfully; his own belly was full of curses, but at that moment he couldn't think of a single one. The onlookers laughed as they watched him, and one after another they asked him what had happened.
"Nothing." Baldy Li shook his head as though nothing were wrong, and said simply, "It is merely a lovers’ quarrel."
With this, Baldy Li prepared to turn around and was about to leave when Lin Hong's parents reemerged, carrying the apples. They called out to him and hurled the apples like hand grenades at his head. Baldy Li ducked and dodged, and after Lin Hong's parents had finished throwing the apples and headed back inside, he turned to the onlookers and innocently shook his head. He squatted down and picked up all the apples, saying, "These are my apples."