Broken Wings (29 page)

The girls laughed.

I turned and called Del, but was disappointed to learn he wasn’t at work.

“He’s coming in at four today,” the other counterman said, and hung up.

“That was an easy ten dollars,” Ainsley Winslow cried when Lisa took the phone back. The girls laughed again, all smiling gleefully.

I hurried away, never feeling more helpless. I won’t let this go on, I vowed. I won’t.

With my driver herding me into the car and watching my every move, and with the house locked up like a penal institution, I boiled over with frustration. I couldn’t call Del and I couldn’t leave school and go to see him. After I was brought home at the end of the school day, I thought about breaking the lock on Daddy’s den-office door so I could get to his telephone and actually went down to the kitchen and got a butter knife out of the silverware drawer. What more could Daddy do to me anyway? I decided.

Just as I was at the door, however, I heard the front door open and Daddy and Carson speaking as they entered. Why were they here this early? Was Daddy coming to check on me?

Panicking, I retreated to the powder room across the way. I heard them laughing, and then I peeked out and saw Daddy unlock his door.

“What a pain in the rear this is,” he told Carson, “locking and unlocking my own office in my house, but for a while, I have to be sure she doesn’t disobey me. And there’s no doubt in my mind that she would if she could.”

“I know, Dad. I’m sorry,” Carson said as if he bore some responsibility for my behavior.

They entered his office, leaving the door open. Maybe they would forget and leave it that way, I hoped, and waited, watching them and listening.

“It was easy for Broderick to pay us the retainer in cash,” Daddy told Carson. “We’re saving him a ton of money and he knows it.”

I saw Daddy put a stack of bills on the desk, open his top desk drawer, take out a key, and then go to his wall safe and take out a metal cash box. Neatly, he put the money into the box.

“Ten thousand tax-free dollars!” Daddy declared. Carson laughed. “I hope you’re learning how to handle some of these clients of mine,” Daddy continued. “Someday, you’ll be in charge of the company, son.”

“You’re not retiring for a long, long time, Dad,” Carson told him, and Daddy smiled at him with such love and pride, I felt my heart ache. Paranoia or no paranoia, I thought, I never felt him look at me like that.

Daddy put the cash box back into his wall safe and put the key to the safe in his top drawer. Then they sat and began to talk about another project.

Boring, I thought, and slipped out and up the stairs. I’d wait to see if Daddy would leave and forget to lock the door. Hours later, Carson left, but Daddy didn’t. I heard him come up and go to his bedroom. When I went down to check the office, the door was locked again. Disappointed, but too frightened to attempt anything with the butter knife now, I retreated to my bedroom.

Later, dinner was conducted in the usual fashion it was conducted these days: a cross-examination of my activities, my school work, and my behavior. Mother sat looking as if she was the one being questioned and prodded. She kept her eyes down, held her breath, and nibbled on her food like a squirrel.

“Remember,” Daddy ended as he did every night since I had been arrested for the bracelet theft, “I hear that you so much as look at one of your teachers crosseyed, and I’ll tighten the walls around you even more,”

What else could you do, lock me in a closet? I wanted to fire back at him, but I didn’t say a word.

Instead, I waited like some predator for an opportunity, which came when he went upstairs to change into more relaxing clothes. This time he had left the office door unlocked. I snuck away from Mommy, who was on the phone, and I slipped into the office, but I didn’t call Del. I was too terrified Daddy might come down and find me in his office. Instead, I went to his window and undid the lock so it could be opened from the outside. Then I retreated to my room for the night, working on my homework, more to occupy myself and pass away the time than any interest I had in the material.

Close to eleven, Daddy came up to bed. I heard him go to his bedroom. Mommy was already there, after having given herself a foot treatment. I heard their muffled voices behind the closed door and as quietly as I could, tiptoed down the stairs and out the French doors in the sitting room.

It was a cool, overcast night, with just the ground lighting and some illumination from the house helping me to find my way around to Daddy’s office. I worried that he had found the window unlocked and had locked it, but when I went to it and tried, it opened and I was able to climb into the room. I dared not put on the lights. Carefully, I picked up the phone and punched out the number of the pizza parlor. If Del had come in at four in the afternoon today, he would still be there to close up, I thought. It rang and rang until finally someone picked up and I asked for Del.

“Who?”

I was afraid to raise my voice too loudly, but I took a chance.

“Del Grant,” I said.

“Del Grant?” I heard a voice I didn’t recognize ask.

“Yes.”

What other Del would be there? I wanted to snap at him.

“He couldn’t come in today. He had problems,” the man said.

“What kind of problems?”

“Family problems.”

“What do you mean? Anything happen to his little brother or sister?”

“What do I look like, the Albany newspaper?” he griped, and hung up.

Couldn’t come in? Family problems? What could have happened? How was I supposed to go back up to my room and sleep? The very thought of having to beg lisa for use of her phone again tomorrow sickened me. I’ve had enough of this, I thought. I don’t care what happens to me now.

I went back into the house and found the SUV keys where they always were. Daddy didn’t hide them. He couldn’t even imagine my taking that car again, I thought. He was so confident I was too afraid. Well, I was, but this was more important to me. I wasn’t going to let my fear stop me.

Our house was so big and my parents’ bedroom was at the far end in the rear, so there was little chance of their hearing the SUV being started. Nevertheless, I drove out very slowly and kept the headlights off until I was out of our driveway and had turned onto the road. Then I gunned the engine and drove as quickly as I could to Del’s house.

All the lights were out when I arrived. It was late now, close to midnight, so I shouldn’t have been surprised, but after hearing what the man at the pizza parlor had said, darkness frightened me. I wasn’t sure what I should do. What if it wasn’t as serious a situation as the man had made it sound? Wouldn’t I cause more trouble by appearing at Del’s front door now? His mother might become very angry, and I might be responsible for bringing unpleasantness just when things were going well for Del and his little brother and sister.

I sat there, trying to decide, and finally concluded that since I had come this far and taken this great a chance, I had to do something. I couldn’t just drive off and forget about it. As quietly as I could, I got out and approached the front door. Hopefully, Del will wake first and come to the door, I thought, and tapped lightly. No lights went on, and I didn’t hear any sounds from within. I knocked harder and waited. Still, no light went on and no one came.

“Del!” I called. “It’s me.”

A dog began barking next door. I heard someone scream, “Be quiet!”

Disappointed, I turned away and started back to the car, but just before I reached it, a taxicab pulled up behind it and Del stepped out of the rear, holding Patty Girl in his arms. Shawn got out after him and immediately took hold of his jacket.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, the moment he saw me.

“I called the pizza parlor and some man told me you had family problems.”

“You could say that,” he remarked, and paid the taxi driver.

“Hi, Shawn,” I said. “Can I take your hand?”

He looked at Del, and then he offered his hand to me.

“What’s happening? What’s wrong?” I asked.

“I’ll tell you all about it after we get them to bed,” Del told me.

They were both so exhausted, it didn’t take long. The expressions on their little faces told me the exhaustion wasn’t only physical. They were overwhelmed with fear and emotional trauma as well. As soon as we closed the door on their room, Del lowered his head.

“She overdosed,” he muttered.

“What?”

“She’s in the hospital, still in a coma. I stayed as long as I could with the kids.” He shook his head. “I’m disgusted with her. I don’t even feel sorry for her. She went off with that LaShay after work and she mixed a few things, including a lot of cocaine. I got the call just before I was supposed to leave for work myself and she was supposed to be home to watch the kids.”

“Oh, Del, I’m so sorry.”

“Yeah. It’s just a matter of time now before the social service worker will be back at that door, this time to tell me they’re going to foster homes,” he said sadly, and flopped onto the chair at the kitchen table.

“You want me to make you something to eat?”

“No. I had a cheese sandwich at the hospital, and my stomach regrets even that,” he replied. He stared so coldly at the wall, I felt my heart ache for him. “I don’t know why I let myself believe her.”

“Because you wanted it to be true so much, Del. Don’t blame yourself for trying to be hopeful.”

He nodded.

“You’re right. I guess when you’re desperate, you’re most vulnerable to fairy tales,” he said, and then widened his eyes with curiosity. “How did you get out to come here? What’s happening with you now?”

“It’s terrible,” I said, flopping in the seat across from him. “I bet people in prison have more freedom than I have.”

“But you’re here,” he noted.

“I snuck out, stole the keys, and came when I heard you were having troubles.”

“Oh, no, not that again. The police will be at my door and that will bring the social workers here faster,” he complained. “You had better get back.”

“I don’t want to go home again, Del.”

“What are you talking about? Where are you going to go? What would you do?”

“What we decided. This is the best time to do it,” I told him, my excitement returning.

“Oh. And how are we supposed to do that, Teal? You and I haven’t enough money to travel and settle in somewhere else with two young children.”

I stared at him and then smiled.

“What?” he said, his lips softening.

“I can get us thousands of dollars,” I said. “And tonight, right now.”

“Thousands? How?”

“I just know where there is a lot of money, and the beauty of it is, no one wants anyone else to know about it.”

He shook his head.

“You’re not making any sense, Teal.”

“Never mind. If I return with ten thousand dollars, will you leave with me now? Will you, Del?”

The reality of what I was saying sank slowly but firmly into his consciousness. I could see his eyes changing, hope replacing defeat and sadness, as what we thought of as dreams and illusion suddenly began to slide into possibility.

“But where would we go?”

“There’s that cousin of yours you mentioned in California, the one you’ve spoken with about your going out there.”

“Yeah, but that was to be by myself, not with two little kids.”

“It won’t matter. He’ll help you, help us. You’ll get work right away and I’ll look after Shawn and Patty Girl until we get them into a school.”

“You just don’t enroll kids in a school, Teal. There are legal papers, guardianships, all that.”

“We’ll figure all that out when we get there, Del. The main thing is, we don’t want to stay here. For you it means losing them anyway, and for me it means walking about in shackles soon.”

He smiled, and then he shook his head.

“It sounds great, but I don’t know.”

“Money will make the difference, Del. It always does,” I said firmly. “The only thing is, we have to decide immediately. I have to do all this now, before they realize I’ve taken it and the car and I’m gone. We need the head start,” I urged.

“I don’t know,” he said, but I could see his resistance weakening.

“It’s a fresh start for both of us, for all of us, Del. We can make it work. Together, we can.”

He looked at me.

“I don’t understand about the money. Why do you say no one wants anyone to know about it?” he asked, and I told him what I had heard Carson and Daddy discuss.

“So they won’t be so quick to report it missing,” I emphasized.

He was thoughtful again.

“We’re not incapable of doing this, Del. We’ll get to California. We’ll do it,” I urged.

He lifted his eyes to me. I could see it was on the tip of his tongue. He was going to do it. My heart was pounding so hard, I thought that was what was making the noise, until we both realized, someone was at his front door. The pounding grew louder. For a moment neither of us could move, and then he rose and looked through the front windows.

“It’s the police!” he said.

“Oh, no. My father.”

“Oh, great,” Del said. “I knew it. I just knew it, Teal. You weren’t thinking.”

“I’m sorry, Del,” I moaned.

“Right, you’re sorry,” he said angrily, and went to the door.

A patrolman stood there gazing in at us. The thought of my being arrested again sickened me. I felt like I would actually faint.

“Del Grant?”

“Yes?”

“The hospital has been trying to reach you. No phone?”

“No, we lost service and I haven’t restored it yet. What is it?”

“Your mother,” he said, and shook his head. “I’m sorry.”

It felt like a bullet had passed through Del into me. Cold and then numbed, I moved up beside him. He was just standing there, nodding.

“You’ll have to contact the hospital as soon as possible,” the policeman said.

Del continued to nod.

“Is there anything we can do for you, get in touch with anyone else?”

“No,” Del said. “Thank you.”

“I’m sorry,” the policeman muttered. It was easy to see he hated the assignment and wanted to get it over with as quickly as he could. He turned and walked back to the patrol car. Del stood there looking out at the street, unmoving.