Broken Lion (33 page)

“Daniel is getting so tall,” Linda said. “I remember when he was a helpless little infant. It seems like just yesterday.”

“I know,” I sighed. “I feel like I blink and he’s an inch taller.”

“It doesn’t help that you work so much.” This was a constant saw between Linda and I. She never told me outright to quit being a doctor, but she was always reminding me of the toll it took on motherhood. I couldn’t argue with her. I just wished she’d drop it after all these years.

I said, “I’ve been spending a lot of time with Daniel lately. Probably more than I have since the divorce.”
Take that.
Linda knew Donald divorced me and not the other way around. When Donald first announced it, I had gone to Linda for advice. She sided with her son, of course, but she had been encouraging at the time. I didn’t think she wanted the divorce any more than I did, but it wasn’t her choice. Or mine.

“So I’ve heard. I’ve also heard you’ve been spending a lot of time with a new man. Is that right?”

“Sort of,” I said cautiously. Linda could be a venomous viper, often striking without warning. Always with proper decorum and refinement, but she attacked without mercy all the same.

“What is the young man’s name?”

“Lion Maxwell.” I’m sure she knew more than she was letting on. Donald told her quite a bit, especially when it involved Daniel.

“What kind of a name is Lion anyway?” She said it with polite disdain.

“A good one,” I smiled.

She smirked. “Are the two of you dating?”

“No. We’re just friends.”

“That’s not the impression I got from Daniel.”

“Oh? What impression did he give you?”

“He said this Tarzan character was your boyfriend.” The way she said Tarzan was not meant as a compliment.

I brushed it off. “I can see how Daniel would think that. Lion and I have a lot of fun every time the three of us are together.”

“There was a time when you said that about Donald.” Was she jabbing at me, or just mourning her son’s divorce? Considering Linda had been married to Ronald Wright for nearly forty years, it was possibly just that. She believed in commitment. “But that is neither here nor there. What concerns me is the relationship Daniel has with this boyfriend of yours, whom I have not met, by the way. Daniel talks about the man incessantly. Sen-say this and sen-say that. I don’t even know what a sen-say is.”

“It’s sensei. Lion is Daniel’s karate teacher. And he’s not my boyfriend.” Was she trying to trip me up?

“I gathered that. But the way Daniel talks about the man, you’d think this Lion character was living with you,” she chuffed.

“He’s not living with me.” Suddenly I was irritated. “Where is this coming from, Linda?”

She sipped her champagne and left lipstick on the rim of the glass. “Oh, I’m just a concerned grandmother looking out for her grandson. You know Daniel is like a second son to me.”

“Yes. And thank you for all that you did to help raise him over the years.” I owed Linda in ways I could never repay and we both knew it. “But I promise, Daniel’s well being is my top priority and—”

“Are you sure?” She smiled when she said it, crocodile style. Red lipstick splotched her teeth. Despite her fading beauty, the stain looked terrible and brought out her conniving side.

“Yes I’m sure. I think Lion is a good influence on Daniel.”

“So is Donald.”

“What are you saying, Linda?” I suddenly wondered if Donald had told her about his kissing me. For all I knew, he and Linda were scheming up ways for him to win me back. I cringed at the thought. After two years, I had thought Donald was completely done with me. But I wouldn’t put it past him to start sniffing around now that Lion was making a claim. It wasn’t like Donald spent his spare time chasing women around. In fact, I wasn’t aware of him dating anybody seriously. Maybe he did want me back. I hoped not. But if he did, that would complicate things for me and Lion.

Linda shrugged like we were discussing recipes. “All I’m saying is that young Daniel already has a strong father figure in his own father. He doesn’t need another one.”

“Linda, I’m not trying to replace Donald. Not as far as Daniel is concerned. Anyway, how could I? Donald has Daniel every other week. He would have him every week if he hadn’t divorced me. But he did.”
Suck on that.
“And I’m not going to stay single forever. Sooner or later, there will be other men in my life. That’s all there is to it. It could be Lion or it could be someone else. Who knows.” I said that just to put her off the scent. “But you and Donald need to get used to it.”

“So you
are
dating this Tarzan, or whatever his name is?” She was baiting me. Clever snake.

I was so irritated with her, I almost said,
Yes and we’re fucking and it’s so much better than it was with your son. Not that you would know. When was the last time you gave Ronald a blowjob? Or do you have the maid do it for you, you rich bitch cunt?
“Lion is just a friend, Linda.” I said it through clenched teeth.

“Is he?” Linda’s eyes searched mine, glinting victory.

“Yes, Linda.” I was practically growling.

“Then I suggest you keep it that way. For your own good.”

She knew something.

But what? And how much? Were her and Donald now both conspiring against me?

“Hey, Grandma!” Daniel shouted as he came running toward us. “I stomped a hundred divots!”

“You did? That’s wonderful sweetheart.” Linda tossed me a look that said,
Did you notice how your son came to me first?

At that moment, I wanted nothing more than to stomp Grandma Linda’s head into the nearest divot.

Chapter 38

BRIGID

Everything blew up in my face two weeks later while I was at work.

It started with an email from Human Resources. The head of HR wanted to meet with me. The reason was vague. I set up an appointment time to meet that Wednesday after lunch, which meant I had to get to the hospital before my shift.

I did my best not to panic as I walked from the parking structure to the circular administration building across from the main hospital. I was shaking by the time I made it up to the third floor. When the receptionist asked me to wait, I was glad for the extra time to collect myself.

Why was I so jittery?

The reason was obvious.

Somebody here knew about me and Lion. There was no other possible explanation. The only question was, who told them? Donald or Linda?

I had known all along it was only a matter of time before this day came. What I didn’t know was what I’d been thinking when I’d agreed to see Lion in the first place. Everyone knew bad girls got punished, especially the ones who fucked the bad boys. I wasn’t above the law. Bad people got caught.

So much for collecting myself.

“Dr. Flanagan?” The receptionist asked.

“Yes?”

“Director Badhoff will see you now.”

I stood slowly, suddenly light headed. It was fitting. I felt like I was walking to the chopping block. My head was about to roll, and my career would roll right along with it.

The director of Human Resources was a woman named Cynthia P. Badhoff. Fittingly ironic. The only thing that would’ve been more ironic was if her name was Sinthia P. Badgirl. Middle name Punishes. Cynthia was in her forties and attractive with platinum blonde hair pulled back in a barrette and a fitted business suit.

“Have a seat, Dr. Flanagan.”

I nearly fell face first into her desk when I caught my toe on her carpet. I wasn’t even wearing heels and I could barely put one foot in front of the other without collapsing. Somehow, I managed to sit down.

This was it.

The beginning of the end.

She folded her hands in front of her on the desk. “Do you know why I called you here today?”

Yes! I’m dating one of my patients!
“No. I’m afraid not.”

“Are you aware of the sexual misconduct policy here at LACH, and the sexual misconduct policies set forth by the Medical Board of California?”

“Yes.”
Because I’ve been violating them daily for months!

“And are you aware that both the hospital and the Medical Board take those policies very seriously?”

“I am.”
But I sure don’t!
I was literally nauseous with guilt. I didn’t know why I hadn’t spilled my guts yet, but I was well on my way.

“And did you know that sexual intercourse with a patient is a violation of the state’s professional code of conduct, and therefore a public offense punishable by disciplinary action?”

“Yes.”
Go ahead and lock me up! My red hair and green eyes will go great with an orange jumpsuit! Ha ha ha ha!

“Uh huh,” she said strangely, like maybe I wasn’t taking this seriously. “And were you aware of the sexual misconduct lawsuit filed against LACH three years ago?”

“I was.” Everybody who worked here knew about it. A few years ago, a woman sued LACH because she had sex with her doctor, Dr. Sonny Gilbert. He was her gynecologist. She accused him of abusing the power dynamic and taking advantage of her by having sex with her during an appointment here in the hospital. He denied it, and the woman didn’t have any proof beyond her version of events, but he probably did it. Dr. Gilbert had a reputation for being a flirt, and prior to the lawsuit, he’d been reprimanded and put on probation twice for alleged instances of sexual harassment involving some of our female staff. The woman suing Dr. Gilbert won her lawsuit. He lost his job at LACH and his medical license was suspended for three years. The hospital had to pay a huge settlement. The amount was secret, but I’d heard it was in the low seven figures. As in $2 to $4 million dollars. After it happened, all the staff had to attend ethical conduct seminars so everyone was aware of what was acceptable and what was not. I had gone. They were a repeat of what I’d learned in medical school and I’d been married at the time, so I didn’t exactly take notes on the part about sex with patients. I was faithful to Donald. But maybe I should’ve listened more closely. To be fair, I never once imagined Lion suing the hospital because I slept with him. He would have been far more likely to sue the hospital if I had
not
slept with him. And, my situation was far different from Dr. Gilbert’s. I wasn’t a flirt and Lion was the one sexually harassing me. So what if I liked it?

“You attended the ethical conduct seminars, if I’m not mistaken, Dr. Flanagan?”

“I did.”

“So you’re aware that the hospital takes any accusation of sexual misconduct extremely seriously?”

“I am.”
But I don’t care!
Actually, I did. I cared so much my stomach was in knots. In fact, I felt seasick. A hot flash burned across my brow and my stomach did a backflip.

She looked at me. “Then perhaps you need a refresher course.”

I tried not to scowl. “I’m well aware of the rules.” My stomach did a front flip and hot bile shot up the back of my throat. I gulped it down.

“Are you sure?” She wasn’t accusing me of anything. But she was hinting like crazy.

“Yes I’m sure.” I wanted to ask her why she was asking. I needed to know who my accuser was and what accusations had been made. She obviously knew something because she wouldn’t have called this meeting otherwise. But if I asked, I would give myself away or at the very least make her more suspicious than she already was.

“Then you can imagine my concern when—”

“Excuse me,” I covered my mouth as more bile bubbled up my throat. I could taste it. Nasty. I swallowed hard, forcing it down, and burped again. “Sorry.” Still covering my mouth, I burped a third time. “I’m really sorry.”

Cynthia frowned and waited a moment before continuing, “Then you can imagine my concern when it was brought to my attention that—”

Without warning I leaned forward and threw up all over her desk. Luckily, I’d had a light lunch. But you couldn’t miss the chunks of kale from the salad I’d eaten. You also couldn’t miss the splatter of vomit on Cynthia’s suit.

“Oh!” She shot to her feet, disgusted.

“Sorry,” I gurgled helplessly.

She swiped tissues from a box she kept on a low cabinet behind her desk and handed them to me. “Are you all right, Dr. Flanagan?”

I retched again and clamped my hand over my mouth. This time, I was able to contain the spew because most of it was already on Cynthia’s desk. And her suit. The spew I could not contain dribbled between my fingers and onto the carpet.

“I think I need to see a doctor,” I said with sweaty mirth.

This situation was so horrifying, all I could do was make light of it. Cynthia was revolted and ready to be done.

“We should plan on continuing this discussion when you’re feeling better, Dr. Flanagan.”

“Great idea!” I croaked wetly and a fresh spasm clamped down on my stomach. Another blast was on its way up the pipe. I hunched over and hurried out of her office.

She called after me. “How about next week?”

Something told me nine months would be a better fit for both our schedules.

<<<<<<<>>>>>>>

I gave myself a pregnancy test that night after my shift.

Not a blood test at the hospital. I didn’t want them knowing just yet. I bought a home pregnancy test kit from Walgreens.

Surprise!

I was pregnant.

This was a disaster.

What was I going to do?

Once I started to show, people at work would start asking questions. The most obvious: who is the father.

I could lie, but we all knew I was terrible at lying.

As a doctor, I was a staunch supporter of a woman’s right to choose. But I would never choose to terminate Lion’s baby. My baby.
Our
baby. I couldn’t do that to him or me or our child. He’d already lost his son Cali. I wouldn’t let him lose another.

I was going to have this baby. There was no question.

Once the names went on the birth certificate, everyone would know my patient had impregnated me shortly after we met.

This was going to kill my career.

Would I get fired from LACH?

Would I lose my medical license?

Would I ever work as a doctor again?

If that happened, how would I support my new baby? Donald would make sure Daniel had everything he needed, but I doubt he’d want to help pay for Lion’s child.