Broken Ever After (3 page)

“
It’s not about the stupid detention!” I covered my face with my hands as I shouted at him, wishing I could pull my eyes from the sockets and not look at his beautiful face ever again. I groaned and slowly dragged my hands down my face to see him staring at me with his mouth agape. I’d never so much as given cheek to a teacher, never mind have an irrational outburst at them but I carried on. “I just feel sick, ok? Why does everyone think that everything is about them today?” I slumped back to the floor not caring about what he could or couldn’t see and put my head back in my hands.

“
I’m sorry, I- I didn’t mean to yell, I just- have a headache; I didn’t sleep too well last night and wanted to put my head down in a quiet room before classes start again. Can you open this door for me?” I looked up at him, getting annoyed that he was still just staring at me. “Or are you just going to stare at me like a zoo animal for the next twenty-five minutes?” He closed his mouth and seemed to think for a moment while scanning the hallway around us which was still empty.

“
I can’t open Miss Granger’s door but I can open mine if you want to sit in with me for a while?” he gave me a small smile looking out of his depth. He unlocked his door and held out his hand to help me up. I took it and pulled myself up; the smell of him, aftershave and something citrusy and the feel of his hand on mine was a heady combination, I swooned a little and stumbled right into him.

He caught me with his other hand landing on my waist to steady me
, as my face buried into his chest. I looked up and his beautiful green eyes met mine. I’m not sure what I saw there, all I could think right then was how much I wanted him to lean down and kiss me. I swallowed hard as I looked from his eyes to his lips as they parted slightly just inches from my own. I could feel his sharp exhale fan over my face. If I just leaned in slightly…

“
I, erm- I’m sorry” I said as I stepped back, looking down away from his gaze. I let go of his hand and he dropped his other hand slowly, almost reluctantly away from my waist, his fingers trailing gently over the fabric of my shirt. I felt his fingers curl against my side almost like they were trying to hold on to me and never let go, but his arms kept pulling them away. “I must have got up too quickly, I’m sorry.” I could feel heat spread over my cheeks.

“
No it’s ok, I err… I probably pulled you up too fast, it’s my fault I’m sorry.” He took a step away from me into the corridor and looked around. “You go sit at the desk in front of mine; I’ll be back in just a sec.” He seemed like he couldn’t look at me, he couldn’t even wait to get away from me. I dragged my bag over to the desk in front of Mr Matthews’ and plonked myself in the seat there; I put my head down on my arms, closing my eyes for a minute to give myself time to breath and collect my thoughts. Why did I have to be such a clumsy idiot? Why didn’t I just kiss him? Why didn’t
he
just kiss
me
?

“
Oh Jesus… Liv… Liv…” I felt a hand stroking my hair away from my face. “Olivia? Come on sweetheart” Jamie?

“
What?” I groaned. I heard him chuckle and felt his hand move over my hair again.

“
Come on, Liv, you need to wake up, it’s time to go, come on.”

“
No, don’t go, don’t leave.” Awareness hit me like a slap in the face and I froze.

“
Erm… Liv? I’m right here, come on.” My eyes shot open and I quickly lifted my head from my arms,
oh no!

“
Umm, I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to fall asleep! What time is it? I better get to registration” I stood up wobbling a little, my head still foggy from my quick nap. I regained my balance, lifted my bag and tried to walk away.

“
Liv, it’s gone half three” he looked at me apologetically.

“
What?” I looked back at him like he just told me it was raining sheep outside; school finished at three! I looked between him, the wall clock and my watch, positive that one of them must be wrong.

“
Err, I went to get you a glass of water to see if it helped you feel better” He motioned towards a glass on the table to show me. “And when I came back you were out of it. Don’t worry, I told Miss Granger and Mr Wilson that you were feeling ill and had fallen asleep and that I couldn’t wake you, so I left you. I’ve just called your dad and told him I’d bring you home when I managed to wake you, he said something about work anyway.” I looked at him shocked. I’d slept through two classes? How?

“
Wait… So your registration class, a bunch of first years and my own class just sat through me snoring?” Oh God, I pulled my hands through my curls as I blushed. I didn’t know where to look, he just chuckled at me.

“
It’s ok don’t worry, you didn’t snore. Although I’m intrigued as to what you were dreaming about just then.” he smirked at me.

“
I don’t remember. Why? What did I say? Oh God please don’t say I said something during class!” I fidgeted nervously, wringing my fingers in my hands and pulling on a lock of hair that had fallen into my grip; I knew I sometimes talked in my sleep, my parents and my Uncle Austin used to tease me about it all the time.

“
Nothing; just that you thought I was going if you woke up” how am I supposed to reply to that? I stood for a sec chewing on my lip while I came up with something.

“
Sorry for sleeping through your class, what did we do? I’ll catch up at home I promise.” I grabbed a pen from his desk trying to overlook the fact that half asleep, I’d just begged him not to leave me. He shook his head and said that I could catch up the next time. I lifted my bag higher up on my shoulder and headed for the door again. “Right, well, sorry again.” I nodded my good-bye embarrassed as hell that I had fallen asleep in his class.

“
Where do you think you are going?” He skipped around me blocking my way to the door.

“
Home?” I raised an eyebrow at him, where did he think I’d be going?

“
I told your father I’d take you.”

“
I can walk, honestly. It’s not far, I’ll be fine.”

“
If it’s not far then it won’t be a problem, will it? I go your way home anyway.” He insisted.

“
How do you know which way I live?”

“
I checked your file for your parents’ numbers and I also sometimes see you in a morning on your way in with Lily or on your way home in the afternoon.” He shrugged at me. I tried to get by him, but he side stepped in my way again with that smirk still plastered on his face.

“
You are so annoying! If I agree will it get you out of my way?” He chuckled at me again.

“
Of course. So
…
shall we?” he offered me his elbow twirling his keys around his finger on his other hand. I tutted and shoved by him, elbowing him in his ribs and going to the door, it was locked.

“
Can you unlock the door? Why is it even locked?”

“
Well we couldn’t have anyone disturbing Sleeping Beauty could we?”

“
I slept through your registration class, two teaching classes and the door opening and closing how many times? I think I could handle it once more.” Or even welcomed it. He paused with his hand on the key in the lock, I realised how close we were again; I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth thinking about just leaning over and kissing him. His eyes flicked down to look over my lips, I could see him thinking, his eyes conveying something that I couldn’t understand; his eyes changed before my own, like he’d just told himself not to lean in to me. He stood up straight, opened the door and walked back to grab his bag and notes. I thought I saw him shake his head but it was such a slight movement I wasn’t sure.

“
Sooo… Did you watch the game then? Or were you cowering behind your sofa?”

“
I knew you’d start that back up again!” I stopped walking, showing my threat not to follow him.

“
Ah come on it’s not that bad!”

“
It is, because you won’t shut up about it until the next time you beat us!” He gave out a wicked laugh that hit me straight between my legs. I followed him towards a black Ford, trying my best to stand upright; he unlocked it and held open the passenger door for me.

“
Do you promise not to taunt me with more football talk?” I asked as I stood between him and the open door.

“
Why would I do a thing like that?” he laughed at me.

“
Fine, I’d much rather walk anyway.” I turned and he grabbed my arm, pulling me back to him.

“
OK… Ok, I promise I won’t mention any football the entire journey.” he said holding up four fingers, parted in the middle like a Trekkie. I laughed at his geekiness and got in the car. I watched him walk around the front to get in the driver’s side, now I really felt sick. I contemplated waiting for him to reach his door before opening mine and running away. I was so nervous being alone with him in his car, torn between legging it and praying he’d kidnap me. Being alone with him sent my imagination running wild and I had to calm down or I was going to hyper-ventilate. Taking a deep breath did nothing but make me feel worse, the car smelled completely of him.

He got in the other side and I had to double check that I had done my seat belt just to stop myself climbing over the centre to him. I looked down at the partition extending from the centre console that ran between us
, not knowing if I should write a letter of thanks or hatred to the designers and manufacturer for it. He started the engine and drove out of school. I glanced at the speedometer, noticing he was a couple of notches under the limit.

“
You’ll have to tell me which turning is yours as I’m not sure” he looked over and smiled at me.

“
Ok” I said quietly and turned to look out of the window. I didn’t trust my voice; I could only just control my breathing. I wonder if he knew how I felt. The dance song playing on the radio pretty much said what I needed it to as I quietly sang along with it, about wanting the person to tell you how much they needed and wanted you.

I had told him once how I felt
, on Valentine’s Day a couple of years previously. I had especially learned the guitar just so I could write him a song to put in a card for him. I knew he could play - and play well, he played in a band with Mr Morris; so I knew he’d be fine with the simple melody I’d created. I wrote the lyrics along with the melody and sealed the envelope with a kiss. Classic cheese I know. He never mentioned anything about it, I’d typed it so he wouldn’t recognise my handwriting, but I was sure I was the only girl to know guitar in his classes.

“
So how come you couldn’t sleep last night?” He asked, breaking through my thoughts.

“
I don’t know; exam stress probably” I lied. It made sense, what was I supposed to say? ‘I was too busy fantasizing about you’ yeah, that would be good. “Well it’s revision fortnight, so everything is starting to feel real now. I’m dreading exams. You know how rubbish I am at maths but I really need to pass it. So that’s one I’m going to fail, I’ll probably stuff up science too and I’ll probably manage to fail my English somehow. The only ones I think I’ll pass are Art and Music as I get to pre-plan those. How badly can that go huh? Wait…” I looked at him and sighed as I held up my hand. “Don’t answer that” He let out that wicked laugh again.

“
No, come on Olivia, you know you’ll do great! I bet it’s not even half as bad as you think it’s going to be. You’ll see” I groaned at Mr Optimistic.

“
So everyone keeps telling me. It’s the next left by the way.” He made the turn and I told him to pull up in front of my dad’s car. I thought he was at work?

“
I promise it won’t be as bad as you think it will be.” he put his hand on my knee in one of those reassuring gestures, that didn’t feel very reassuring at all; I wanted more and my breath caught in my throat.

“
Erm…” He slowly pulled his hand away from my knee, fisting his hand on the steering wheel. “Thanks for the ride home Mr Matthews; oh and the nap.” I smiled at him.

“
You are more than welcome, Olivia” he smiled back and I got out of the car. He rolled the window down and leaned over the seat and said “Hey, Liv?” I whirled around and he handed me a piece of paper that he’d pulled from the pocket inside of his jacket. “Your parents need to sign your detention slip. Oh and you are really cute when you sleep by the way.” He sat up smirking at me, put his car into gear and sped off.

I stood there staring after him. Did that just happen? A pool of warmth spread through my stomach as I watched his car turn the
corner at the end of my street.

I managed to drag myself inside the house after I’d watched his car turn the corner at the top of the street. My dad came out of the kitchen to see if I was ok.

“
Hey, honey. How are you feeling? Your teacher said you were sick and fell asleep.”

“
No, I wasn’t sick, I just felt it. I’m really tired though I should probably go on up to bed.” He pressed his cool hands to my forehead.

“
You don’t feel hot.” He lifted his other hand to check my glands in my throat and I swatted him away.

“
Dad! Stop fussing, I’m fine; it’s probably one of those twenty-four hour things.” I tried to walk through to the kitchen to get a drink but he stood in my way. “Dad, really, I’m fine.”

“
Are you sure? Let me grab my bag and I’ll check you properly.” I groaned and walked up the stairs instead.

“
Night dad.” I called as I stomped upstairs.

“
I need to get to the hospital, I’m due on shift soon; I just wanted to check you were ok. Will you be fine on your own? I can call Uncle Austin to come over if you need?”

I stopped midway on the stairs and sighed loudly.
“I’m sure he has more important things to do than babysit. Seriously… I’m fine. Go… Shoo!” I ushered him towards the door with a wave of my hand. “I’ll call if I need you or mum, I promise.” I turned and made my way up the stairs again, stopping once more as curiosity got the better of me. “Dad? I thought you and mum were in work already?”

“
No, I’m due in at four.” He looked confused.

“
So why couldn’t you pick me up?”

“
I was about to, but your teacher insisted on me letting him drop you home as it’s on his way.” He shrugged at me. He insisted on bringing me home? He’d told me that my Mum and Dad were working. Hadn’t he? “Well anyway, I’ve left you something simple to eat in the fridge in case you get hungry later on and I’ve left the number of my-” I groaned, quickly running up the rest of the stairs and slammed my door behind me. I threw my bag down on the floor beside my desk and flopped down in my chair wondering what I should do.

Revision may be a good ide
a but my head was still swimming from Jamie’s comment.
What the hell am I supposed to do with that?
I decided on taking a cool shower, maybe that would help clear my clouded thoughts and an early night would definitely help with the enormous headache I had.

***

After another restless night’s sleep I had to force myself out of bed the next morning so I had time to do my hair for school; I refused to spend two days looking like a fuzz ball. I could just imagine what Megan and all of the popular girls thought of the state of me the day before; I didn’t actually care too much but I hated giving them more reasons to bitch about me.

I
’d felt so nervous since waking up that I wasn’t sure if I could face breakfast. The sound of Jamie’s voice saying he thought I was cute when I was asleep played on a loop over and over in my mind; what the hell was that about? Should I mention it? Forget it? Would I just be humiliating myself?

On our walk to school in the morning Lily had given me all of the details about my nap through our lesson. She said that for his registration class Mr Matthews had made them all stay outside of the room so I wasn
’t woken by them, he had his lesson before ours moved to the next room as it was free and our class all got held outside while he said that they needed to study in silence. Anyone that so much as whispered and woke me, would find themselves in detention for the rest of the week, lunch time and after school. I purposely never told her about him giving me a ride home; that would set her off going crazy over analysing everything, when I wasn’t sure there was actually anything to analyse at all.

When Lily and I got to school we headed up to registration. I contemplated hiding in the bathroom until I knew Miss Granger would be there so I could avoid Mr Matthews
, but it was too late he was already heading up the corridor. I positioned myself behind Lily with my back pressed to the wall so that he wouldn’t see me. His eyes drifted over the line only stopping when they found me, as if he was looking for me; that sexy smirk appeared on his lips. I was blushing so badly, I felt like my cheeks were on fire; putting my hands on them to cool them down as I headed for the door. I looked back and was stunned when Jamie winked at me. Oh god he was killing me. I could tell he was trying to play with me.

My day was dragging by
, it didn’t help that I was watching every minute tick by on my watch. Who actually counts down the seconds until they had detention?
Silly little girls that crush on their teachers?
I didn’t have maths on a Tuesday, so it would be the end of the day that I saw him, apart from the odd glance in the hallway where he’d smile that beautiful smile at me and I swear when I’d turned around at one point he was checking out my rear, blushing slightly when he noticed I’d caught him.

I had a double period of Art for my last lesson so I tried to use the quiet planning time to calm myself down but it didn
’t work very well. By the time the bell rang I was even more nervous than I’d ever been in my life; I couldn’t believe I had to go and sit with him for the next hour, thank god I hadn’t quite finished my art exam prep so I could have something to concentrate on. I took a little longer putting my things away than I usually would have, using the extra couple of minutes to take long deep breaths to calm my nerves and then walked back over to his building from the art studios.

When I got there the corridors were nearly empty of students except for a few stragglers lurking by their lockers. I got up to his classroom and his door was locked
; I knocked and called his name but he didn’t answer. Odd, I thought, surely he hadn’t forgotten about my detention? I waited for five minutes but started getting impatient; I dumped my art folder and bag on the floor outside of his door and started pacing the corridor stopping every now and then to glance over posters that I didn’t actually absorb.

“
Leaving so soon, Miss Stevens?” The sound of his voice made me jump, my heart leaping through my chest and a yelp darting from my tongue.

“
Yeah, I was just heading to the hospital to see if I was having a
heart attack
!” I half yelled at him as I walked back towards the classroom, holding my now thumping heart. I shoved him playfully on his arm and he chuckled at me while unlocking his door. I handed him my unsigned detention slip, grinning, then looked down at my watch. “You do know that you’re ten minutes late, right? That’s your time, not mine” I told him.

“
Your time starts when I say it does, Miss Stevens” I hoped to God that he was joking. My eyes skimmed down to his lips as he smiled at me, taking in how soft and inviting they looked; nervously I chewed on my own as I followed him in to the classroom. He’d picked up my art folder and my bag and carried them in for me, landing them on the desk in front of his where I napped the day before. “Wow, what the hell do you have in that thing?” he asked when he put my bag down.

“
Erm… Text books, water, keys, art stuff, my diary, mail sack of love letters, three changes of shoes, the kitchen sink.” I smiled sweetly at him.

“
You keep a diary? And have enough admirers to need an entire mail sack?” He looked at me shocked.

“
Why? Do you want to read it?” I smirked at him “and sadly not in regards to the mail sack… I have a special truck for those.” I grinned.

“
ha-ha. I don’t know, it depends if there is anything about me in it?” he winked at me and sat down at his desk. What’s with all the winking today?

“
You are on every page.” I sighed dreamily at him. Well he would be if I really had one. I was blushing again; I wish I could control that. I sat down at the desk and tried to avoid his gaze.

“
And what do you say about me?” He enquired as he looked down over a student’s work.

“
How much of an arse you are.” He looked up with raised eyebrows and laughed at me. I bit the inside of my cheek trying not to smile. “I erm… Is it ok if I carry on with my planning from art class? I got most of it done already, I just have a few more things to do and I’d really like to finish it today.” I gave him a tight, nervous smile. He narrowed his eyes at me slightly looking like he wanted to say something but just nodded instead. I got all of my pieces in order and glued into position ready to show Mr Wilson on Friday and was happy with my plan, I smiled down at my work happy with my finished piece and breathed a sigh of relief.

“
All done?” I looked up to see Mr Matthews resting his chin on his linked fingers, I nodded and began clearing my things away. “May I see?” I looked down at my plan and nodded to him again before I stood up to take my rubbish to the bin. He got up from his desk and walked around to mine looking down at my work. “So what is it all? I mean, what does it all mean?”

“
It’s a personal history topic, I don’t really like talking about my past so I made it about school life, hence the photo of my class mates walking away, leaving school behind.” I’d called it ‘No Regrets’ which was ironic as I was filled with regret for every day that went by and I hadn’t told him what I was feeling. I was an idiot. I sighed wishing that I could just be honest with him.

“
Why?” I looked at him questioningly after completely forgetting what I’d just said to him. “You said you don’t like talking about your past, you are only eighteen; you can’t have much of a past.” I shook my head.

“
It’s not a story you want to hear and one I want to share, even less.” Forcing the sick feeling down my throat and mentally begging myself not to cry, I quickly changed the subject and explained the rest of my work to him.

“
Wow! This all looks really great Olivia. What are you going to do with the plan then?”

“
We’re allowed to take it into our exam, so I’m going to sketch out everything you see here and then paint it all. We have a portfolio to hand in on it too.” I got it out of my folder and handed it to him. “The pieces in there are supposed to support my main exam. I’m dreading it, I don’t know if I’ll get it all done in time. I think I may have overestimated my skills” I laughed nervously. He was still flicking through my work, taking in the details of some of the photographs I’d taken and reading all of the captions I’d written to explain them. I felt the blood flooding my cheeks as he flicked through the photographs of me, the small sketches and self-portraits, how close up and personal they were and how intently he was looking through all of them.

“
I think these are fantastic.” he looked up at me “I bet you’ll do just fine” he said really low. He was stood so close to me, I blinked up at him and tried to gather my thoughts. Right, put my stuff away, that was enough to distract me from the stupid fantasies that flooded my imagination. I pulled away from him to continue clearing my things away; I peeked up at Mr Matthews through my lashes as he put my portfolio down on the table and saw him shake his head slightly. What did I do? Did he hate my work? My desk was empty and I still had thirty-five minutes of detention left to do.

“
Mr Matthews?”

“
Yes?” He looked up from some marking he was doing.

“
Do you have a text book I can use? I thought I should do something more productive than just sit here. I left my book at home as we didn’t have class today and I could probably use a bit of help studying if you aren’t too busy?” I glanced down at the massive pile of marking he was working through.
What are you doing?
I mentally slapped myself; I could have just sat staring at him for the rest of my time!

“
No I’m not too busy to help.” he pushed the work away, gave me one of his dazzling smiles and got up. “I’ll just grab my copy and we can see which bits you are having trouble with still.” He slapped the book down hard on the table making me jump; he chuckled and motioned with his hand for me to move up to the next seat so he could sit next to me. My heart was in my throat, I didn’t expect him to sit with me, I figured he’d stay where he was. I was scared to breathe as my breaths were coming out in pants; I hoped with all my might that he couldn’t tell. I was trapped between him and the wall and the desk behind me. “You just find a topic you are uncomfortable with and we can start there.” He looked over to me and I could feel my stupid cheeks on fire, thankful for my long hair falling down over my face.

“
Erm… You see the name of the book?” He looked down at the book then back to me with a puzzled look on his face. “Yeah, that’s the topic I’m uncomfortable with” I gave him a small smile that didn’t reach my eyes and he laughed at me.

“
Right, well what is your worst part and we can go with that, ok?” I groaned.

“
Algebra and Functions? Actually, no, I don’t think we have long enough for that!” He laughed at me again.

“
How about we go over that in the next couple of lessons?” he offered with a sympathetic smile.

“
Ok.”