Bring on the Rain (31 page)

“
I can’t believe it either.”
Her tone was sarcastic, meant to break the sexual tension. It
didn’t.

“
What we did the other
night. I must have replayed it billion times. You tasted good. I
could have-”

Madeline choked, “Mitch…”

Mitch smiled, his eyes burnished.
“Madeline.”

She felt his hand drop, then his
fingers rubbed across hers as they gazed unbroken. “Did you do that
for Bud?”

Madeline turned dull red. “Did you do
that for Ronda?” Her chuckle was strained, nervous.

“
Hell no.” He laughed as if
it were hilarious even to imagine.

She sobered. “No, we weren’t intimate.
It wasn’t antagonistic, you understand. I presume I was distant. Or
so Brook tells me.”

“
Bud was an asshole.” Mitch
reminded her about the political dinner. He recalled everything,
where he sat, what she wore, how her hair was done.

“
Oh.” Madeline shrugged. “I
got used to it. It didn’t affect me. He was just that
way.”

“
Um.”

She told him, “We were ill matched. It
wasn’t anyone’s fault. We simply stayed together too long for
Brook’s sake, and Bud’s image. When he realized I wasn’t the kind
of wife he needed in his career, and Brook wasn’t fooled by our
civility, he finally walked away.”

“
Ronda wasn’t that easy,” he
confided, idly running his fingers over her arm. “She liked
bitching and screaming. She wanted out, sure, but she wanted to
have the last word. She always knew I loved someone
else.”

“
Mitch.”

“
Hey, we’re talking history
now, don't get uptight.”

Madeline said, “Bud didn’t know me well
enough, nor care enough to try and bridge our gulfs. He figured I
was like Mother, at least. He used that as one of his reasons for
making a mistake with me. Don’t get me wrong, Mitch. I didn’t try
very hard. I wasn’t good for him.”

Mitch admitted next. “I think I was
absent emotionally, at first I argued and cussed, threw as many
fits as she did… Eventually I didn’t bother.”

“
That must have been rough
on Jason.”

“
Jason was one of those
blunt kids.” Mitch smiled lazily. “He’d get right in my face and
hers too, and tell us to grow up or shut up.”

She laughed, “And then he’d do
something charming.”

“
You got it. He was way too
cool for a kid.”

They sat there a moment more in
relaxation, absorbing what each other had said and admitted. He
said to her next, “I’m trying not to think how long it’s been for
you. Trying not to ask you to let me love you till
daylight.”

Madeline tingled inside and out, aware
that her body had been aroused for some time. It was easy, with so
much of him bare to her eyes. The sound of his deep voice, the way
he looked at her. “I can’t not go home, Mitch. Brook would be
scared and worried.”

“
I know.” Mitch sighed too.
“I’m hard though, I’ve been that way on, and off since I walked
into the Tavern tonight. I was watching you eat and…” He grunted,
looked away a moment and admitted, “It would be a quickie. But I’m
going to ask you anyway.” He glanced back at her.

Oh. She was too tempted. “I need to get
home. I should have left sooner.”

Mitch nodded, sat up, and turned the
music off.

Madeline sat up too, and told him,
“There are things going on in my life. Some have nothing to do with
you. Others well, you are a part of it. I could be like we were
when we were young and take sex anyway, anywhere. Lord knows I need
that, okay? But I’m a person with obligations, and complications,
and things are undone in my life.”

She looked down at the floor and
admitted, “After us, after it ended, I had to move on eventually,
which means I have a separate life and history from yours. We have
acted on our impulse, our attraction once. We’re talking to each
other now.”

Madeline glanced up at him again. “But
I’ve got parts of my life you don't know about, I’m wondering if
you’re realizing? Are you thinking I’m the girl I was then? And
good sex will fill up all the empty spaces? Meld the past with the
present? That we will do it and look at each other afterwards-and
just know everything about each other? “

Mitch was sitting, listening close, and
gazing at her.

She added in a whisper. “I want you,
yes, I do. My body is starving for it. I try not to screw up
anymore, Mitch. I try to face what I have to. And all the while,
take care of those things that are mine to do.”

Mitch chewed his lip thoughtfully,
looked down at the carpet this time. “I know we’re not the same
people. I knew you would take longer coming to me, than I’m eager
to get back to you. I was no good at talking when we were younger.
I’m finding it easier now. But I think there’s more holding you
back. I’ll be honest too, okay?” Mitch glanced up. ”I don't know…if
I want to hear you say it. I did think being lovers would bring you
over, stop you…from telling me… we can’t ever have anything
real.”

Madeline sighed and reached out,
covering his hand. “I didn’t talk either. I probably wouldn't now,
but like you, I am trying to keep everything in perspective this
time. Give me time, Mitch. I’m not sure how things will turn out in
the end, but I have things I have to say to you that aren’t easy
for me. These things I have carried inside for twenty years. It’s
not going to be good for either of us. If I don't feel close
enough…or safe enough, with you…to say them.”

He nodded slowly obviously reluctant to
drop the conversation now, to not probe and pull those things out
of her and get it done with.

But they arose, and she collected her
things, and the tension was broken when Madeline put her boots
on.

“
Very sexy.” Mitch laughed
at her get-up. “I think it’ll start a new trend.”

On the porch, she said, “You don't have
to follow me home, I’m awake.”

He admitted, “I would anyhow, to make
sure.”

He did follow her. Madeline looked up a
dozen times and saw his headlights. However, he hung back, down the
street from her house. She pulled in, went inside, and watched out
the window until he was gone.

“
Where the hell have you
been?” Brook was sitting on the sofa. Her voice made Madeline
jump.

“
God almighty, Brook!”
Madeline held a hand to the wall, and one to her heart. “Turn the
light on! You scared the shit out of me.”

“
I don't need a light to see
that outfit.” Brook snorted laughing. “All right, Mom, come
clean.”

“
Mitch picked me up, took me
to his house, cooked me dinner, and loaned me clothes so I could
shower.’

Brook’s lips were open. “No
duh?”

“
And, we—did not— have
sex.”

Brook looked disappointed.

“
Where is Karla?”

“
Passed out.”

“
Asleep?”

Brook sighed and shook her head. “No,
drunk…Wait, wait--let me tell it.” She held up a hand, no doubt
seeing Madeline’s angry face in the shadows. “Coy and I were in the
all night mart, looking around. Karla ran into guys from school and
went out in the parking lot. We thought maybe she was flirting
around. Heck, Mom, I felt bad ‘cause she kept saying she was a
third wheel, uncomfortable. I had no idea what she was up
to—”

Madeline cut in, “I thought she was
okay with Jenna dating.”

Brook told her of Karla’s comments. “I
love her, Mom, we’ve been friends forever, but I can’t help it she
can’t parallel her life to mine. Personally, I think she’s smarter
than I am, and God knows she has a body that kills. But this Tony
guy thing seems to have brought out all sorts of feelings. I keep
telling her, I will be a friend forever, no matter what or where we
end up, being friends will come first. She’s like, in her own thing
now. She’s mad about the school she‘s going to. And suddenly she‘s
throwing up all the clubs and things I was in. Somehow, accusing
me, because she didn‘t get things. Mom, you know she didn‘t try
out. She‘s bitter all the time and I... I don‘t know what to
do.”

Damn, Karla had fooled her. Madeline
should have picked up on the tension between them and Karla’s real
feelings. However, the things going on in her own life, the stress
with Brook, and her own search to find middle ground, work, she
simply had taken her word for it.

Madeline could see Brook was bummed,
they had been best friends, and Brook had this whole pride thing
about not being a part of snotty clicks and making sure, she earned
what she got. She sold things, worked, did chores to afford things
Jenna bought for Karla. Madeline sure didn’t make what a nurse did.
She wasn’t sure what to do either. She would hate for all those
years of friendship and their bond, to fracture. They had always
talked about when they grew up, had husbands and kids, staying best
friends.

Madeline muttered, “I can’t have this
going on. Jenna will blame me.”

“
Mom, Karla has been drunk
before.”

“
Does Jenna
know?”

“
Yes. Look, even I got tipsy
a time or two. But this is way out there for her, pulling this
stunt now and on us.”

She sat down in the chair. “Damn, I
don't need this right now.”

“
I’m sorry.”

“
No, it’s all right. I
understand her in a way. She lost her dad and Jenna has been
stressed. Tony is not right for her mother. And it’s hard for her
to watch you have choices, when she hasn’t any options.”

“
I know.” Brook sat up. In
her jammies and without makeup now. “I got her showered and in bed,
she’s going to be puking in the morning.”

“
What did Coy
say?”

“
He laughed at first, well
it was kind of funny, and Karla was smashed. But he thought you
might blame him.”

“
I don't. I’m tired. Let’s
deal with this after some sleep.”

“
Okay, but…I find it
interesting you went to dinner with Mitch.”

“
We’ll discuss that too, you
and me alone, later.”

“
Good night, Mom.” Brook
said heading to her room. She whispered, “Thanks for not freaking
out.”

“
If I wasn’t tired, I
would.” Madeline locked the door, headed for her own bed, falling
into a deep sleep.

Chapter 17

“
I’m sorry.” Karla was
crying the next afternoon as they all lunched on the porch, sitting
around the wicker table. “I got stupid. I felt, lonely and
angry.”

Madeline took her hand. Karla looked a
bit green still and was lunching on broth and crackers, while they
had cold cut hoagies and chips. “What can I do? What I can do to
help you?” Scrubbed clean of makeup, her hair braided and dressed
in a big T-shirt and shorts, Karl’s eyes overflowed and she wiped
her nose. “I’m sorry is all. My life is screwed.”

“
No, it’s not.”

“
Yes it is. What have I got?
I got nothing. You know I can’t even count on Mom now. She is
totally blind to Tony. Handing our lives over to him. I haven’t
even got a date for the Prom.”

“
Oh, Karla.” Madeline felt
the girl’s pain. “I know it seems bad. However, nothing stays down
forever. Pretty soon, you’ll control your own life and—”

“
Not going to community
college I won‘t. It’s not even, what I want anymore. I want out of
this stupid place. I’m sick of this town.” Her lips trembled.
“Brook is lucky, she has you, and Coy, and even her Dad.
“

“
Your mother loves you,
Karla.”

“
Yeah? Well she dropped me
quick enough. She won’t listen to me anymore. It’s like she wants
me over and done, out of the house, so she can do her thing with
Tony.”

“
Hey, is that fair? Look how
long she’s been alone. She deserves something more than work in her
life.”

“
I’m not saying she
doesn’t.” Karla sniffled. “I’m saying she don't care enough about
me to listen anymore to what I want. Half the plans we made will
never happen, with Tony in the picture.”

Brook said, “You’ve got me, backing
you, girlfriend.”

Karla bit her lip. “You don't
understand, Brook, and you’re lucky. You’ve always been lucky.” The
girl broke down. She arose. “Excuse me,” she whispered and dashed
in the house.

They could hear her crying. Madeline
said, “Give her time.”

“
This sucks.” Brook picked
at her food. “I thought we’d be hanging out, talking about the
Prom, laughing, and now, I feel like shit. And I don't know what
I’ve done?”

“
It’s her problem, and it’s
very real to her.”

Brook set the food down. “I know.” She
looked out into the yard. “I don't know how to help her through
it.”

“
Neither do I, we’ll be here
for her. It’s all we can do. When Jenna comes back, I’m going to
talk to her. She will probably cuss me out. But this can’t go
on.”