Bridge to Haven (54 page)

Say something, Joshua!
He couldn’t find words. When she left, he felt bereft, until he looked down at the bowl of oatmeal. Ugh!

Javier grinned from his place by the window. “Don’t you like oatmeal, Freeman?”

“It’s great. Would you mind sharing your maple syrup?”

McGillicuddy laughed as he cut a piece of juicy breakfast steak. “Never figured a good Christian boy like you losing your head over a girl like that.”

A girl like that? Heat flooded Joshua’s system. He had to clench his jaw so he wouldn’t say something stupid.

Chet Branson scraped strawberry jam onto his sourdough toast. “A little thin, but she sure has curves in all the right places. She looks nervous. First day on the job, and she draws a bunch of goons like us.”

Javier Hernandez had drenched his pancakes in maple syrup while
watching Abra. “That’s the worst hairstyle I’ve ever seen. Why would a pretty girl do that to herself?”

Joshua checked the menu for the cost of his meal. He dug out his wallet and left enough to cover the cost, plus a good tip, then gathered his silverware, bowl of mush, and mug of coffee and stood. “Nothing personal. But if you gentlemen will excuse me, I think I’ll sit at the counter.”

McGillicuddy laughed. “Careful, Freeman. She might spill coffee in your lap.”

Joshua took a stool next to the break in the counter, closest to the coffeemaker. Clarice delivered several breakfasts and looked from him to the three men in the window booth. “Trouble?”

“Not at all.” He watched Abra pick up two more breakfasts from the cook’s counter.

Clarice looked at Abra and back at him. “Oh. I see.” She smiled and came closer, lowering her voice. “Her name’s Abby Jones. Some thieving woman in a Cadillac gave her a ride from Saugus and then took off with her suitcase in the backseat yesterday.” Abra went past without looking at them. “Poor girl doesn’t have a dime to her name. But she’s an answer to my prayers. She’s working here and at the motel to pay her way. Not sure what she’ll do when you all head out and we won’t need her anymore.”

Joshua had a few ideas about that, but he didn’t want to get ahead of himself. His list of questions kept growing. Abra came back and reached for a coffeepot. Clarice stepped over, said something in a low voice, took the second coffeepot, and headed out. Abra wilted a little. She approached him like a lamb facing a hungry lion ready to tear into her. She refilled his mug. He leaned forward, willing her to look at him. “Hello, Abra.”

“Hello, Joshua.” Her hand shook enough to spill coffee on the counter. She uttered a tortured sigh as the rivulet of brown ran over the edge onto his work pants. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m so
clumsy . . .” She looked around and grabbed for a rag, then didn’t know what to do with it.

Joshua took it and dropped it on the spilled coffee. “It’s all right.” He brushed drops of scalding hot coffee from his jeans. “No harm done.”

She lifted his mug and cleaned up the spilled coffee. “How’d you find me?” She stared at him with wide, pale-green eyes.

“I didn’t. I’ve been here for a week working on a movie set just outside town.”

“Oh.” Her cheeks flushed pink, a look of disgust on her face. “Pretty conceited of me, isn’t it? To think you’d come all this way to look for me.”

He frowned slightly, wishing he knew what was going on inside her head. “I would have come all this way to look for you, if I’d known you were here. I went after you the night you left with Dylan. I came south three months ago, thinking I might make another attempt at finding you.”

He didn’t want to make her cry again, and she looked perilously close.

“I’ve been living with Dave Upton. Remember him?”

She swallowed convulsively. “You used to ride bikes together.”

“Yep.” He pushed the bowl of oatmeal aside and crossed his arms on the counter. “He’s married now and has two kids.” Someone called for more coffee. He wanted to turn and yell, “Give us a minute, would you?” But he knew she had a job and he was keeping her from doing it. She slipped away. Clarice shook her head at him. Frowning, he sipped coffee.

Rudy slapped the bell again, and Abra came to fetch the plates and head out from behind the counter to serve customers. She returned for the coffeepot. Men ate quickly, paid their tabs, and left. Joshua managed to get the oatmeal down. He needed to have something in his stomach for the day ahead. The place was clearing out quickly.
He didn’t have to wonder if she was avoiding him. She kept moving around the diner, overly attentive to the remaining customers. As much as he wanted to stay and corner her, he had responsibilities.

Clarice bused the counter, wiping it down and setting out new paper place mats and silverware. “More coffee?” He said no thank you and dug for his wallet until Clarice reminded him he’d left money to cover the meal and a tip at the booth.

“Don’t take this wrong, Joshua.” She took a quick glance at Abra busing tables, and gave him a steady look. “That girl needs a friend, not a boyfriend, if you take my meaning.”

“I do. You don’t have to worry.”

“I’d better not.” She set the coffeepot into the machine behind her and faced him. “Plenty of others in here this morning who looked like they have ideas about her, and in her circumstance that could be a temptation and a problem all in one.”

He didn’t pretend not to understand. He’d seen too many women in Korea turn to prostitution to survive. Clarice went out to clear a booth as Abra headed back with a tray of dirty dishes and glasses. Joshua stood where she couldn’t get by him. She didn’t raise her head. “I’m on duty, Joshua.”

“I know. I’ll make it quick. This can’t be a coincidence, Abra. God orchestrated this meeting.”

She gave a bleak laugh. “I doubt God wants anything to do with me.”

“Then how do you explain you and me ending up in the same one-horse town on the edge of nowhere at the same time? God put me here a week ahead of you. I think He’s trying to tell you something. I heard you crying last night.”

She lifted her head, lips apart, mortified. Maybe he shouldn’t have told her that.

“And don’t give me that look. I wasn’t the one telling you to shut up.” He could see the brokenness now in the way she stood, the way
her gaze flickered away. The dishes rattled. Time to leave her alone. “Are you still going to be here when I get off work?”
Oh, God, please. Don’t let her run away again.

She looked up at him then, eyes glassy with tears. “Where could I go that God wouldn’t find me?” Her voice broke.

Joshua wanted to dump the tray, pull her close, and hold her tight, but they were standing in a diner. And Clarice gave them a worried look. It wasn’t the right time or place. “Good.”

She bowed her head. “Please move.”

Joshua gave her room to get around him. He gave her a last look before he went out the door.
Lord, let her know how much You love her.

Abra bused the remaining tables, headed back to the motel, and spent the rest of the morning making up beds, cleaning toilets, and vacuuming worn rugs. Her mind churned with a chorus of voices.
You don’t have to listen to Joshua, you know. He probably wants to remind you of how many people you hurt back in Haven. He probably wants to find out what happened with Dylan so he can say he told you so.
Half a dozen men had hinted they wanted to “get to know” her. She could pick any one and attach herself long enough to get away.

Like a leech, a parasite attached to its unsuspecting host?

Another Franklin?

The fact that she had even considered it filled her with self-loathing.

Joshua. What was she going to say when he came back?

She’d thought about him so many times since she’d left Haven. She couldn’t believe it when she saw him sitting there in that booth, staring at her like she was a ghost. Or a zombie. She gave a mirthless laugh. Did he even know about all that? It was hardly the kind of movie he’d ever pay to see.

Five years and she’d never called anyone back home. What must he think of her? Whatever he had to say, she owed it to him to listen.

Wiping sweat from her forehead, Abra went on scrubbing the bathroom floor. She couldn’t think more than a day ahead. When she finished her shift tonight at the diner, she’d have to wash the uniform and apron in the motel sink. With the desert heat, her clothes would be dry enough to iron by morning.

I have a job and food to eat and a place to sleep. That’s enough right now. Thank You, God, for the roof over my head. It’s more than I deserve.
She took freshly laundered towels from a delivery bag and stacked them on the storage room shelves.

She finished making up the motel rooms by two, and went to the five-and-dime. She’d made enough in tips this morning to buy a package of cheap underwear, a toothbrush, toothpaste, and a hairbrush. She showered and tried to nap before the evening shift at the diner, but her mind wouldn’t rest.

Pulling the Gideon Bible out of her nightstand, she went to the list of topics in back. She spent the next two hours looking up Scriptures. She remembered many that she and Penny had memorized for Sunday school classes when they were little girls. Pastor Zeke had preached on some. Joshua and Mitzi had often spoken in words like these.

She’d lived in darkness for so long, but now, somewhere deep inside her, light flickered.

Clarice told her there wouldn’t be as many customers for the supper shift. “Most head for the bar and grill. We have steaks, too, but we don’t serve alcohol. Rudy’s got a thing about it. Means less business, but he’s adamant. The special tonight is pot roast, mashed potatoes, and carrots. Fresh apple, peach, and cherry pie.”

“Is there anything I can do right now?”

“Marry the mustard.” Clarice’s eyes lit with amusement at Abra’s expression, and she explained. “Mix the fresh in with what’s left in the dispensers.”

Every time the bell over the door jangled, Abra’s heart jumped.
She swooped on customers and offered them quick service in order to keep from thinking about Joshua. Maybe he’d changed his mind about coming back. Maybe he had gone down to the bar and grill. Did he drink now? He never had before. She thought of Franklin pouring Scotch, getting drunk almost every night because it was the only way he could sleep.

Everyone else had begun to leave when Joshua came in the door. His hair was wet and he was wearing clean jeans and a lightweight, short-sleeved blue-checked shirt tucked in at the waist.

He had changed in five years. He was broader, more muscular, his dark hair cropped short. He chatted briefly with Clarice and took a table in Abra’s serving area.

She knew she couldn’t avoid him forever. She didn’t know what she expected, but certainly not the look that met hers when she gave him a menu. He smiled the same smile he always had. “I’m glad you stayed.” He’d always been confident. From the time he was a boy, he knew who he was. It didn’t matter what he did as long as he did his best at whatever God had set before him. He liked people. He’d always been warm, friendly, interested in everyone and everything going on around him.

“Nowhere else to go.” What chance was there that they could ever be friends again, let alone anything more? She needed to remind herself. “I’ve burned all my bridges.”

“Do you really think so?”

Hope hurt. Better not to let it grow.

“I know what I want.” He handed the menu back without looking at it.

She felt an odd sensation in the pit of her stomach and took her pad and pencil from her apron pocket. She kept her tone neutral. “What can I get you?” Joshua ordered the special. She brought him water and iced tea, then left him alone until his dinner was ready.

She set the plate in front of him. “Enjoy your dinner.” She refilled
his glass of iced tea once, kept busy and at a distance until he finished. She delivered his check and cleared his plate. He paid at the register and handed her a folded bill as a tip. A dollar was far too much. She tucked it in her apron pocket without looking at it.

“I’m not leaving, Abra.”

He looked at her like nothing had changed between them. But everything had. She wasn’t the same girl he’d known in Haven. She’d been naive, innocent, troubled, full of angst, so eager to rebel, to break free. Joshua had watched over her as an infant, played with her when she was a toddler, taken her under his wing when she was a teen, and tried to make her listen to reason when she’d wanted nothing more than to throw herself at a devil who’d end up using her, abusing her, and throwing her away.

How could Joshua have that tender look in his eyes, as though he still cared the same way he always had? “It’d be best if you did leave, Joshua.”

He tilted his head, trying to study her face. “Why?”

She straightened her shoulders and met his gaze. “Because I’ve done things you couldn’t even imagine since I left Haven.”

“I was in a war, Abra. Remember?” He spoke gently. “I’ve seen plenty.” His fingers brushed her arm, and she felt her skin tingle, but not the way it had when Dylan touched her. “Let’s talk when you finish your shift.”

She swallowed hard. “I wouldn’t know what to say.”