Bride of Vengeance (Highland Romance Series Book 1) (9 page)

“I love you.” Lydia’s frantic admission forced Nathanial’s completion. He groaned as he spilled his life inside of her.

The two lovers lay in each other’s arms for long moments afterwards. Each of them lost in their own thoughts, miles away mentally from the other.

Lydia was in awe of this man who could make her feel so many things at once. Laird Garrison could make her angry enough to murder one moment, and then take everything from her the next. And she would give it to him willingly. That was the most baffling part of all. Lydia would give him anything he wanted, and that scared the hell out of her.

Nathanial’s thoughts were focused on the girl that was now resting on his chest, falling gently to sleep. She had bewitched him completely. Nathanial felt Lydia slump in his arms, the true sign that she had, indeed, fallen asleep. The fearsome Laird could not help but smile after he kissed her head and closed his own eyes. Lydia loved him. At least, she had said she did. At that moment in his life, it was all that mattered. She was a troublesome annoyance of a girl, but she was his and she loved him. Lydia had said so herself.

Chapter Thirteen

Had she really said that out loud? Lydia awoke the next morning and immediately regretted it. The only thing she could hear or think was the loudest declaration of love anyone had ever given foolishly, or so she was sure it was. What had she done? Lydia was slow to open her eyes. She was sure Nathanial would be staring down at her with anger or displeasure in his eyes. Surely he did not want some English girl loving him. Yet, she was alone.

It was with the regret of a thousand mistakes that Lydia forced herself out of bed that morning. She’d been cooped up for long enough. She needed some air. As long as that air was in the direct opposite area of the keep that Nathanial was in.

She did not want to see him today. Lydia was quick and quiet as she made her way through the halls of Nathanial’s home. The place was bleak, but she was sure all Highland men lived this way. She was, however, still shocked to see not a color other than brown or grey as she made her way to the back entrance of the place. And she had not seen another living soul so far.

It did not take long to hear them, though. Two women, one older, one young, stood outside the doors of the keep talking as Lydia slowly opened and readied to leave.

“She’ll not be here long.” The younger of them predicted. Both women stared off into the fields where the men trained. “I’ve known that boy since he was a wee lad. One thing has been on his mind: revenge. He’ll do what needs to be done and be rid of her.”

“For all of our sakes, I hope yer right.”

Lydia fought the urge to greet the women. Her mother would have placed a big, fat grin on her face and started conversation with these hags who were clearly gossiping about her life. Lydia was not that way, though she wished she was.

Lydia closed the door, taking great effort to be silent. She then made her way towards the back of the building. There was a small kitchen that looked like it had never been used, except for that it was as filthy as the rest of the keep.

The weak, now highly insulted girl left through the kitchen. The brutal Highland air greeted her at once. Still, it was not as ruthless as those women just were to her. But they were right, weren’t they? The only reason Lydia married Nathanial was because he’d promised her he’d let her go. Was she still telling herself this lie?

Lydia found herself walking farther and farther away from the keep, lost in her thoughts. All of a sudden she was tired, her side ached, though not nearly as much as her heart. She looked back towards the keep and it just seemed so far away. Lydia sat down on the cold ground and tried to catch her breath. Her mother had told her stories of grief overcoming a person so deeply they could not think, they could not breathe. The woman had always been a bright beam of hope. She used to warn Lydia this might happen to her if she did not behave. She would rot from the inside out from the agony that came with loving a man that could never be hers. Lydia was sure this is what was happening to her now. Her grief was going to swallow her heart whole, and there would be nothing left of her.

Giving into grief is not something a woman of strength should do; Lydia chided herself even as she broke into tears. She hid her face in her hands and let both drop into her knees. She stayed like that, letting it all go. She was not sure how long she had been in this condition. She was even less sure how Nathanial was able to sneak up on her like he did. One minute she was alone in the world, the next she was being hauled to his side. He wrapped and arm around her and did the best he could to comfort her.

Lydia was quick to pull herself together then. Nathanial Garrison would not see her weep. She wiped her eyes and stared straight ahead, sitting rigid in his arms.

“What’s got you crying, Lydia?” Any number of things, he knew. This was not the life most women would wish for. The Highlands alone could break the strongest people.

“When am I to leave, Laird?” Lydia’s question threw him off guard. One minute she was weeping and the next she was ready to ride into battle against him. “Your vengeance must be complete now. When will you be done with me?”

“Soon.” Laird Garrison matched her tone, though not willing to release her yet. He kept his arm draped over her shoulder, keeping her glued to his side.

“I’d like to know an exact time, Laird. I have plans to make and I’d like to be concise.”

“Plans to make? Like killing Fane?”

“Yes.”

“I suppose you’ll be fit enough to ride off into battle any day now, will ye?”

“I am healing…”

“Men who’ve had brushed with Devil’s Powder have been out for months. That’s two times for you, Lydia. There is no healing from that.”

“Two times?” Lydia narrowed her gaze.

“You’ll not be leaving.” Nathanial was not willing to get into that conversation now. He stood. “Yer too weak. You won’t make it past the keep, as proven.”

Lydia stood in a flash and almost fell over. Nathanial was rolling his eyes when he reached out and steadied her. “I am not weak.” Lydia slapped his arms away. “You…” She was going to cry again, she could feel it. “You promised I could go.”

“I lied.” Nathanial turned and started walking away. He’d come back for her when she proved she was too weak to come back on her own.

“Does hurting me help your pain?” Lydia was right beside him now. She was giving it her all. Lydia reached for his arm; Nathanial whirled around and grabbed her by the shoulders. Before he could shake sense into her Lydia, eyes shimmering with tears, she declared, “My father did not care if I live or die. Why?” Lydia tried to shrug his hands off her arms. It did not work. “Why can’t you let me go?”

Nathanial seemed to think about it for a long time. How could he tell her the truth now? Nathanial let go of her and walked away from her. That familiar guilt overcame him once again. He should turn and tell her the truth. The truth that he was expecting to marry an English brat and hate her. He was planning on killing her father, after ruining their good name, and then he was going to send her away. But all of that changed when he met her. Nathanial stalked away from his wife knowing the truth. He could not let her go because he loved her.

He would never say it, though, and he hated that he felt it. He hated that she had declared her love for him the night before. This was not the way his life was supposed to turn out. If there was one thing Highland men hated more than anything, it was not being in control of their own fates. By God, he would get the control back.

Nathanial walked passed Duncan at the gate of the keep. “Make sure she makes it back.” And then he disappeared into his home.

Lydia watched him leave. Anger, humiliation and deep sadness took over when she saw her husband whisper something to his right hand man. Duncan was bid to come collect her.

“Lass,” Duncan tried to smile as he approached the girl.

“Don’t worry about me, Duncan.” Lydia walked right past him, head held high. “You can go along to your other duties.”

Slowly, painfully, mostly awkwardly, Lydia made her way back to her new home. As she entered through the kitchen she made eye contact with both the women who were gossiping about her before. They took one look at her and Lydia could immediately see the pity in their eyes.

“Come, dear.” One of them called to her. She pulled out a stool for her to take a seat. The other one worked fast, making her a cup of what was supposed to be tea; mostly it was just boiled water. Lydia accepted it anyway.

Together, the three women sat in complete silence. Lydia was not sure how much time had actually passed before the older of the two Highland women finally spoke.

“He’s a good man.” Her voice was sure. “That’s not to say you aren’t a good and gentle lady.” She hurried on. “It’s just that… this is a bad situation for a lot of people.” The older woman looked to her friend for some help. The younger woman sighed before she spoke.

“We’ll make sure you have an easy time here.”

“Of course we will.” Lydia was suddenly in the arms of both women. “And who knows, you’ll probably be going home in no time.”

All good feelings Lydia might have been holding onto vanished. She closed her eyes and willed herself not to cry again. “I am not feeling well.” Lydia managed to say without sounding emotional. “I need to lie down.”

“Of course you do. The Highlands are no place for a gentle lady.”

“Thank you.” Lydia stood. “I’ll just be on my way.”

“I’ll see you to your room, dear. My name is Hannah, by the way.” Hannah, the older of the two women led Lydia out of the kitchen. “That one there is my daughter, Elizabeth.”

“Nice to meet you both. I can find my way.” Lydia meant it as a farewell. She was not sure how much more she could take.

“I doubt it.” Elizabeth was now walking with them. “Laird just now moved you to another room.” Mother and daughter continued on. Neither seemed to notice that Lydia had stopped cold. “It’s on the other end of the castle.”

Hannah noticed Lydia’s absence first. She turned and saw the girl simply staring. Was she daft? The English were always funny.

“He moved me?” Lydia finally asked.

“I told you he was a good man.” Hannah took Lydia’s hand and started walking again. “My husband would never take my feelings into consideration like that.”

“I see.” Lydia forced a smile. It was weak and sad, but it was a smile. It was the best anyone was going to get right now. Her husband banished her to the other end of his home.

The room was about as far away from Nathanial as she could get. It was bigger and much nicer than the one she had spent so many nights with Nathanial. It was lonely. Lydia walked inside and sat on the bed, leaving the two hovering women staring after her.

“You’ll feel better with some sleep, dear.” Hannah shut the bedroom door and sent a frown to her daughter. “Poor girl.”

“He gives her a reprieve and she still is unhappy.” Elizabeth answered as the two walked away.

Inside the room, Lydia stayed sitting in the same position the women left her. She sat for hours wondering if her husband was going to bother coming to see her again. Deep inside she knew the truth, the man wanted nothing to do with her.

Chapter Fourteen

Laird Garrison did nothing to ease Lydia’s fear for the next several weeks. In fact, it seemed like the man was doing everything in his power to avoid his wife. The first few days of his callous behavior was agony for the young bride. After the first week, though, she grew thicker skin. In fact, she grew angrier, hateful skin towards the man she was forced to marry.

Lydia’s days were filled with long walks and exercise, trying to gain her strength. Then she would help the kitchen staff all through the afternoon, much to their dismay at first. Within the first few days, however, Hannah and Elizabeth looked forward to the time spent with their mistress. They still found her to be terribly emotional and bothersome, but she was a joy to be around as well.

Lydia was fine spending time with everyone in the village except for Laird Garrison. She had seen him twice since their last argument. Both times she was getting to know another one of his followers. One of these occasions, Lydia even made eye contact with him. Would he have addressed her had she not turned her nose to him and walked the other direction? Most likely not, she assured herself. He was as stubborn as a daft mule.

Funny, Lydia thought one night as she was falling asleep, she had had so many opportunities to run away since she had been there, and not once had she tried anything. Yet.

Sure, she had Hannah and Elizabeth commission some new boy’s riding clothes for her. She had to promise they were not really for her, of course. In reality, Lydia was more than prepared to flee the Highlands and never look back. Yet, she had not. Maybe knowing that Nathanial did not want her actually eased her need to run. Maybe she could live the rest of her life as a stranger to the man she married. His people were marvelous, and she enjoyed being with them. Perhaps, just perhaps, after she killed Baron Fane, she would come back and live with them in peace. Nathanial was not a threat to her anymore.

****

The nights were the hardest on him. Nathanial Garrison stood outside his wife’s room as he did almost every night since they stopped speaking. He stood there and prayed for the strength to walk away. Daytime was the easiest for him. There was so much to be done in his land, so many of his people depended on him. Sure, Lydia was always on his mind, but he was busy enough not to dwell on it, not to act on it.

Nighttime was an entirely different species of hell. Laird Garrison would return home to find not a soul in sight. How easy it would be for him to sneak into his wife’s room and seduce her before she could get angry enough to throw him out. He knew he could always count on her passion. Even if the girl wanted him dead, there was no hiding the way she felt about him. Lydia consistently gave him all of her. Was it because she did not know any better? Of course it was. Women were a fickle sex. Once Lydia knew the power she had over him, she would use it.

And still, on this night in particular, he simply did not care. Nathanial told himself that if Lydia had locked the bedroom to her door, he would leave her alone. He knew it was a lie even as he reached for the handle. Luckily for all of them, the door was unlocked. The Laird would not have to embarrass himself by kicking in her door tonight.

He’d been weeks without her. It had to end tonight. He would say whatever she needed to hear to get her back into his arms. Nathanial would declare his love for her. It would not be a lie. The realization hit him as he stared down at Lydia as she slept.

His wife, for one of the first times since he’d known her, looked to be at peace. He thought not to disturb her, even as he was lying down in bed beside her. Lydia’s dark lashes fluttered open, her eyes found his immediately, even in the darkness. It was not hard; his face was so close to hers she could feel his breath on her.

Nathanial braced himself for the hatred, the anger and the screams that would surely follow. He was ready to combat them. They never came. Lydia slowly, lovingly reached up and touched his cheek. She then placed a kiss on his mouth and looked up at him.

“I’m very angry with you.” Lydia confessed.

“I figured.” Nathanial was able to admit before his mouth found hers for a hungry kiss. Their lovemaking was fast, passionate and fearless. When they were both spent, satisfied, Lydia lay in her husband’s arms and fell asleep.

Nathanial took much longer to let himself go. However, he would not find the peaceful sleep his wife found. An hour after she had fallen asleep in his arms, Duncan came to stand in the doorway. The look on his face told his Laird there was serious trouble afoot.

****

Lydia opened her eyes after about ten minutes of sleeping in her husband’s arms, or so it felt. In truth, she had been sleeping over an hour and her husband had just left her. Why in heavens was her door opened? It was only cracked, but it was enough to make Lydia feel like she was naked in front of the entire world. Lydia arose from her bed and quickly put on her wrapper. Then she walked to the door ready to close it. It was her husband’s voice that stopped her. It was muffled, but it sounded stressed and worried. It made the hairs on Lydia’s neck stand.

Lydia slowly opened the door and took a few steps into the hall. She could not hear the words, but she could tell there were several men in the great hall. Lydia took her time down the hall; she used the tricks Callum had taught her all those years ago. She did not make a sound as she came to the entrance of the large room. She could hear them now.

“When is the wedding?” Nathanial’s voice was calmer now. Lydia could almost feel her stress ease. Almost.

“In two weeks time.” It was a voice Lydia had never heard before.

“He lies.” Duncan now spoke up. “It’s obviously a trap.” Duncan was ready to kill.

“It
is
obviously a trap.” Nathanial agreed. “But for who?” His last words trailed off.

When the stranger spoke again, the truth and severity of the situation hit Lydia like a slap to the face. “I’ve been asked to deliver this message to lady Lydia.”

“You’ll do no such thing.” Duncan was outraged.

“I cannot leave until I have done so, sir.”

“Even in the face of certain death, English?” Duncan pulled his sword from his sheath. The sound was eerily sinister to Lydia.

“Englishmen are known for their honor.” The voice contradicted. “Lydia’s mother begged me to deliver the message. She said…”

“What?” Nathanial was deep in thought as he spoke. “She said what?”

“She said she knows in her heart Lydia would not allow this to happen to Mary. She is afraid of what Baron Fane will do to her youngest if they are married.”

Lydia’s hand flew to her mouth. Oh God, Mary.

“You will consider the message coming to me good enough.” Nathanial was standing now. Lydia hurried and hid herself behind the mantle leading upstairs.

When the three men came into view, Lydia was immediately seen by the Englishman. The man who was so close to arguing with Laird Garrison and getting killed was now nodding. He averted his gaze from the Laird’s wife, keeping her location secret.

“Is there a message you would that I return?”

“Tell Lydia’s mother that she will not win.” With that, Nathanial turned back towards Lydia’s room.

“Laird,” The Englishman hastened. When Garrison turned back around, the Englishman regretted it. “I was hoping not to return this night.” English turned to Duncan now. “The ride, you see, was difficult.”

“Aye, I bet it was.” Nothing but disdain laced Duncan’s voice.

Nathanial took a step towards English. Lydia snuck out from behind the banister and walked backwards until she could not be seen anymore. She had made her getaway.

“Duncan, find him a place to sleep away from the others.”

“I promise to leave at first light.” English was loud in his declaration. He even smiled. “Thank you so much for your hospitality.”

“Never mention it again.” Nathanial said before walking away from both men.

English, for some reason, looked like he had just won, Duncan puzzled as he led the man out of the holding.

****

Lydia was barely able to get back in bed and close her eyes before her husband was lying next to her once more. Was this the end of discussion for him? He was just going to pretend it never happened? Lydia raged inside, she struggled to keep her breathing normal as he wrapped her in his arms. Lydia feigned waking up. She was even able to smile at her husband and kiss his lips. Then she closed her eyes again and pretended to drift back to sleep.

Inside she was dying. Was Nathanial going to save her sister? It did not seem so. What did he mean by sending her mother such a message? What
game
? Was all this still a game to him? Mary was going to be married to Baron Fane. He would ruin her life, or worse. Something had to be done.

“I love you, Lydia.” Nathanial whispered in her ear. It took everything in her to pretend she was sleeping.

He what? Lydia’s heart leapt out of her chest. Seconds later, her husband was resting her back in her bed and leaving the room. He shut the doors behind him this time.

Lydia was once again alone with her thoughts. Mary. Oh, God. Mary. Lydia sat up in bed and stared out the window. Something had to be done. Lydia was not going to stand idly by and watch her family crumble to pieces. It might be a game to her husband, but she was going to end it once and for all.

What had English said? And wasn’t it to her? He would leave at first light. By God she would be leaving with him.