Brian Friel Plays 2 (4 page)

Rose
(
to
Chris
)
And who are you to talk, Christina Mundy! Don’t you dare lecture me!

Maggie
Everybody in the town knows that Danny Bradley is –

Rose
(
to
Maggie
)
And you’re jealous, too! That’s what’s wrong with the whole of you – you’re jealous of me! (
to 
Agnes
)
He calls me his Rosebud. He waited for me outside the chapel gate last Christmas morning and he gave me this. (
She
opens
the
front
of
her
apron.
A
charm
and
a
medal
are
pinned
to
her
jumper
.)
‘That’s for my Rosebud,’ he said.

Agnes
Is it a fish, Rosie?

Rose
Isn’t it lovely? It’s made of pure silver. And it brings you good luck.

Agnes
It is lovely.

Rose
I wear it all the time – beside my miraculous medal. (
Pause
.)
I love him, Aggie.

Agnes
I know.

Chris
(
softly
)
Bastard.

Rose
closes
the
front
of
her
apron.
She
is
on
the
point
of
tears.
Silence.
Now
Maggie
lifts
her
hen-bucket
and
using
it
as
a
dancing
partner
she
does
a
very
fast
and
very
exaggerated
tango
across
the
kitchen
floor
as
she
sings
in
her
parodic
style
the
words
from
‘The
Isle
of
Capri’:

Maggie

‘Summer time was nearly over;

Blue Italian skies above.

I said, “Mister, I’m a rover.

Can’t you spare a sweet word of love?”’

And
without
pausing
for
breath
she
begins
calling
her
hens
as
she
exits
by
the
back
door:

Tchook-tchook-tchook-tchook-tchook-tchook-tchook-tchookeeeeeee …

Michael
enters
and
stands
stage
left.
Rose
takes
the
lid
off
the
range
and
throws
turf
into
the
fire.

Chris
For God’s sake, I have an iron in there!

Rose
How was I to know that?

Chris
Don’t you see me ironing? (
fishing
with
tongs
) Now you’ve lost it. Get out of my road, will you!

Agnes
Rosie, love, would you give me a hand with this (
of
wool
)? If we don’t work a bit faster we’ll never get two dozen pairs finished this week.

The
convention
must
now
be
established
that
the
(
imaginary
)
Boy
Michael
is
working
at
the
kite
materials
lying
on
the
ground.
No
dialogue
with
the
Boy
Michael
must
ever
be
addressed
directly
to
adult
Michael,
the
narrator.
Here,
for
example,
Maggie
has
her
back
to
the
narrator.
Michael
responds
to
Maggie
in
his
ordinary
narrator’s
voice.
Maggie
enters
the
garden
from
the
back
of
the
house.

Maggie
What are these supposed to be?

Boy
Kites.

Maggie
Kites! God help your wit!

Boy
Watch where you’re walking, Aunt Maggie – you’re standing on a tail.

Maggie
Did it squeal? – haaaa! I’ll make a deal with you, cub: I’ll give you a penny if those things ever leave the ground. Right?

Boy
You’re on.

She
now
squats
down
beside
him.

Maggie
I’ve new riddles for you.

Boy
Give up.

Maggie
What goes round the house and round the house and sits in the corner? (
Pause
.) A broom! Why is a river like a watch?

Boy
You’re pathetic.

Maggie
Because it never goes far without winding! Hairy out and hairy in, lift your foot and stab it in – what is it?

Pause.

Boy
Give up.

Maggie
Think!

Boy
Give up.

Maggie
Have you even one brain in your head?

Boy
Give up.

Maggie
A sock!

Boy
A what?

Maggie
A sock – a sock! You know – lift your foot and stab it – (
She
demonstrates.
No
response
.)
D’you know what your trouble is, cub? You-are-buck-stupid!

Boy
Look out – there’s a rat!

She
screams
and
leaps
to
her
feet
in
terror.

Maggie
Where? – where? – where? Jesus, Mary and Joseph, where is it?

Boy
Caught you again, Aunt Maggie.

Maggie
You evil wee brat – God forgive you! I’ll get you for that, Michael! Don’t you worry – I won’t forget that! (
She
picks
up
her
bucket
and
moves
off
towards
the
back
of
the
house.
Stops
.)
And I had a barley sugar sweet for you.

Boy
Are there bits of cigarette tobacco stuck to it?

Maggie
Jesus Christ! Some day you’re going to fill some woman’s life full of happiness. (
moving
off
)
Tchook-
tchook-tchook-tchook … (
Again
she
stops
and
throws
him
a
sweet.
)
There. I hope it chokes you. (
Exits.
) Tchook-tchook-tchook-tchook-tchookeeeee …

Michael
When I saw Uncle Jack for the first time the reason I was so shocked by his appearance was that I expected – well, I suppose, the hero from a schoolboy’s book. Once I had seen a photograph of him radiant and splendid in his officer’s uniform. It had fallen out of Aunt Kate’s prayer book and she snatched it from me before I could study it in detail. It was a picture taken in 1917 when he was a chaplain to the British forces in East Africa and he looked – magnificent. But Aunt Kate had been involved locally in the War of Independence; so Father Jack’s brief career in the British army was never referred to in that house. All the same the wonderful Father Jack of that photo was the image of him that lodged in my mind.

But if he was a hero to me, he was a hero and a saint to my mother and to my aunts. They pored over his occasional letters. They prayed every night for him and for his lepers and for the success of his mission. They scraped and saved for him – sixpence here, a shilling there – sacrifices they made willingly, joyously, so that they would have a little money to send to him at Christmas and for his birthday. And every so often when a story would appear in the
Donegal
Enquirer
about ‘our own leper priest’, as they called him – because Ballybeg was proud of him, the whole of Donegal was proud of him – it was only natural that our family would enjoy a small share of that fame – it gave us that little bit of status in the eyes of the parish. And it must have helped my aunts to bear the shame Mother brought on the household by having me – as it was called then
–
out of wedlock.

Kate
enters
left,
laden
with
shopping
bags.
When
she
sees
the
Boy
working
at
his
kites
her
face
lights
up
with
pleasure.
She
watches
him
for
a
few
seconds.
Then
she
goes
to
him.

Kate
Well, that’s what I call a busy man. Come here and give your Aunt Kate a big kiss. (
She
catches
his
head
between
her
hands
and
kisses
the
crown
of
his
head.
)
And what’s all this? It’s a kite, is it?

Boy
It’s two kites.

Kate
(
inspecting
them
)
It certainly is two kites. And they’re the most wonderful kites I’ve ever seen. And what are these designs? (
She
studies
the
kite
faces
which
the
audience
cannot
see.
)

Boy
They’re faces. I painted them.

Kate
(
pretending
horror
)
Oh, good Lord, they put the heart across me! You did those? Oh, God bless us, those are scarifying? What are they? Devils? Ghosts? I wouldn’t like to see those lads up in the sky looking down at me! Hold on now … (
She
searches
in
her
bags
and
produces
a
small,
wooden
spinning-top
and
whip.
)
Do you know what this is? Of course you do – a spinning-top. Good boy. And this – this is the whip. You know how to use it? Indeed you do. What do you say?

Boy
Thanks.

Kate
Thank you, Aunt Kate. And do you know what I have in here? A new library book! With coloured pictures! We’ll begin reading it at bedtime. (
Again
she
kisses
the
top
of
his
head.
She
gets
to
her
feet.
)
Call me the moment you’re ready to fly them. I wouldn’t miss that for all the world. (
She
goes
into
the
kitchen.
)
D’you know what he’s at out there? Did you see, Christina? Making two kites!

Chris
Some kites he’ll make.

Kate
All by himself. No help from anybody.

Agnes
You always said he was talented, Kate.

Kate
No question about that. And very mature for his years.

Chris
Very cheeky for his years.

Rose
I think he’s beautiful, Chris. I wish he was mine.

Chris
Is that a spinning-top he has?

Kate
It’s nothing.

Michael
exits
left.

Chris
Oh, Kate, you have him spoiled. Where did you get it?

Kate
Morgan’s Arcade.

Chris
And I’m sure he didn’t even thank you.

Rose
I know why you went into Morgan’s!

Kate
He did indeed. He’s very mannerly.

Rose
You wanted to see Austin Morgan!

Kate
Every field along the road – they’re all out at the hay and the corn.

Rose
Because you have a notion of that aul Austin Morgan!

Kate
Going to be a good harvest by the look of it.

Rose
I know you have! She’s blushing! Look! Isn’t she blushing?

Chris
holds
up
a
skirt
she
is
ironing.

Chris
You’d need to put a stitch in that hem, Rosie.

Rose
(
to
Kate
)
But what you don’t know is that he’s going with a wee young thing from Carrickfad.