Breed of Envy (The Breed Chronicles, #02) (11 page)

“I don’t see anything broken.”

“This is from your original scan,” she explained, “and this is the one from today. It’s going to replay like a video, so you’ll see exactly what I saw as it scanned.”

I was sure there was some importance to her words, but I didn’t understand what it was. “Am I broken or not? I just want to get back to class.”

“You really are in a mood, aren’t you? Have some patience, Jade.”

A new image appeared and, as with the real scan, I could see where the beam of lights hit. When it reached my hands, she paused the holograph-video thing and pointed. “These are the fractures,” she said, pointing to dark lines over my knuckles.

“Fine. You were right.” I shrugged. “Like I said, they’ll heal.”

“Just keep watching.”

As the image played again, the little lines became smaller, and then they got smaller and smaller until they were nothing but barely-visible specs.

Doc turned off the holograph image. “I knew you healed quickly, but that’s incredible, Jade.”

“So I can go back to class now?”

“You can,” she said, speaking slowly.

As soon as the words left her mouth, I started for the exit.

“But you’ll have to watch from the sidelines if you do,” she added. I stopped and turned to face her. “Even if they’re not broken now, they were, just minutes ago. They need time to fully heal, Jade. I’ll run the scan again on Friday and see what it looks like. But until then, no physical training—and that includes Weapons class.”

“Well, that’s just great.” When she looked ready to say something else, I shook my head and stormed away before she could.

I made my way back to the fifth floor. Standing outside the door, I debated just going back to my room instead. The last thing I wanted to do was sit around and do nothing.

My knuckles were fine. They didn’t even hurt anymore, and a quick glance at them revealed they were completely healed. There wasn’t even a sign they’d been busted or cracked or anything.

Whatever. I’m not going to just sit around and do nothing
, I thought to myself and went back inside.

Mr. Connor came over to me. “Nothing broken?”

“Nope.”

It wasn’t a lie, because nothing was broken
now
, but I knew it was still wrong and probably a bad, bad idea. Not because I was hurt (I wasn’t), but because if Doc knew I was going to keep participating, she’d throw a huge fit over it. But right then, I didn’t care. I had to do something. Sitting in my room, or even reading, just wasn’t going to cut it. I’d joined the CGE to train and I wasn’t taking a break from that, even for only a few days.

Not today. Not this month.

C
HAPTER 06

My irritable mood lasted the rest of the week. Not just lasted, but got immensely worse. I spent most of my classes like a lit fuse, just waiting to explode. I was pretty sure it was just me overreacting and not everyone else trying to drive me insane (like the chick beside me in Demonology who kept kicking her desk leg), but even with that knowledge, I couldn’t keep calm.

I wasn’t sleeping, I was barely eating, and I’d spent pretty much every waking hour avoiding everyone, including Linc, which just made me feel ten times worse. I was on time for my classes, but I left as soon as they were over and didn’t give anyone a chance to talk to me. If I wasn’t in my room, I was in the gym using the punching bag, or on the track running laps. It was ironic that two of the things I hated most were the two things I had to do to keep from going insane.

The closer Friday got, the worse my temper got. Everyone noticed, I was sure. How could they not when I was snapping at people or ignoring them altogether? Linc knew something was wrong before anyone else, and he’d tried talking to me after Combat class Tuesday, but I’d damn near bitten his head off, so he’d just walked away and left me alone.

In a way, I’d been glad, because it made one less person to worry about, one less piece of stress I had to deal with. In another, it made me really mad, because I wanted him to keep trying. And still, in another completely irrational and mental way, it made me really, really sad. I wanted to talk (or scream or yell), but I didn’t want to talk to anyone about anything.

And nothing you think makes any kind of sense
, I thought with a sigh, slowing down for my last lap on the track.

I’d seen Linc staring at me sometimes, but we hadn’t really talked in days. He’d been outside at the track a few of the times I’d been running, either alone or with Tasha. I had a sneaky feeling he was trying to keep an eye on me without being too conspicuous about it, but he failed. Miserably.

Then again, knowing him, he probably hadn’t tried being inconspicuous at all.

I walked half the length of the track, then made my way to the bleachers for some water.

“Ready?”

My eyes widened as I looked up and found Linc walking toward me. “What are you doing here?”

He made a face at my tone (which had probably sounded meaner than I actually meant) and then just shrugged. “It’s Friday. We have our appointment with Doc.”

“Oh. Right.” I’d almost forgotten about it. “She’ll probably just take us separately,” I said, picking up my gym bag and tossing the strap over my shoulder.

I glanced at Linc as we walked back to the North Tower. He had this expression on his face, like he wanted to say or ask something but couldn’t figure out how, so I braced myself for it, and for the fight that would probably come because of it.

But he never said anything. Instead, we silently made our way to the second floor and the Terminator Tube room, where Linc knocked on the door. Doc answered a second later and motioned us inside. “Come on,” she said, walking away from us briskly.

I followed in behind.

Wasting no time, Doc handed him the plasticy-silk gown and he marched off to the changing room.

Doc gave me a sheepish smile, like she expected me to say something. Normally, I probably would have, but today I just didn’t care. “You okay, Jade? You’re awfully quiet.”

“I’m fine,” I said for what felt like the umpteenth million time in a week.

Doc gave me a tight nod as Linc came out of the changing room. She led him to the Terminator Tube and hooked him up to all the electrodes. With all the wires hanging everywhere and the flash of the lights, he looked as alien-like as I’d felt the first time. Well, he didn’t look like an alien so much, maybe, but he looked like he was hooked up to a big alien machine.

Looking up as Doc connected the IV thing, I studied Linc. His blue eyes met mine and there was a ghost of a smile on his face. I tried to return it but knew I’d failed when he frowned and looked away.

It shouldn’t have bothered me, but it did. And I had no one to blame but myself. I was the one who’d basically ignored him for the last week, so I couldn’t be mad that he wasn’t exactly thrilled with me now, could I?

No, but I still am
, a small voice whispered. I shoved my hands into my pockets and sighed as I started to pace a short line between the door and the computer console, careful to keep my gaze away from Linc and Doc.

It seemed like only a minute had gone by before I heard Doc call my name. My head snapped up in time to see her toss me the gown I had to wear. Without a word, I turned away and went to change.

As soon as I was hooked up to the TT, Linc and Doc walked back to the console. She turned on the holographic imaging thing and let Linc watch as it scanned my body. I decided it was more than slightly weird that he was seeing my innards. Actually, it was more than weird. “Shouldn’t you at least ask me before showing my insides to people?” I snapped.

“I don’t need your permission to show him
his
scan,” Doc said, her tone admonishing.

From here, I couldn’t really tell whose body it’d been, because it was the muscle-y image (at least that’s what I thought it was since everything was pink and white).

Linc looked up at me with a hurt, I-can’t-believe-you-said-that look, and then he shook his head.

“Sorry,” I mumbled.

Linc walked away from the console and paced, like I’d done moments before. He didn’t glance at me or say anything. He just wore this odd expression I hadn’t really seen before that left my stomach in knots.

After the first round of the scan, Doc looked up. “Your knuckles are showing newly healed fractures,” she said, sounding surprised. “They were nearly completely healed before you left Tuesday. Considering the rate of your healing, they should have been fine by now.”

I shrugged.

Linc stopped pacing and turned back to face Doc. He cast me a glance (mostly a scowl) and raised his eyebrows. “Thought you said your hand was fine.”

“It is fine.”

Doc stormed over to the TT. “Her knuckles had hairline fractures, which is far from fine.”

Linc’s expression went to shock. “Why the hell were you back in class with broken knuckles?”

“Fractured.”

He rolled his eyes at my comment. “Whatever.”

“My
knuckles
,” I said, emphasizing the word, “were hurt.”

Doc’s steely gaze met mine. “I said you could go back to your classes, but that you couldn’t participate until today, until I’d had a chance to make sure they were really healing properly.”

“Oh, she participated all right,” Linc said.

They were both talking to me or about me, but their voices were garbled in my head. My heart started to pound.

“What?” Doc’s tone was just barely under a yell and her eyes went huge. “You’re not acting like yourself, Jade. You’re disregarding the rules, not worrying about your body. You’re short with everyone.”

Linc nodded to Doc. “She’s been acting weird for the past week.”

I started to hear buzzing in my ears and my hands curled into fists. I opened my mouth to say something, but Doc rambled on before I could manage to find words
to
say.

“What has gotten into you?” Doc lifted her hands and then dropped them, like she wasn’t sure what to do with them. “Why are you acting like this? Are you trying to hurt yourself? You heal quickly, but even you’re not invincible, Jade.”

“I never said I was.” I didn’t think it, either. No one was invincible. No one was safe.

“Then why are you acting like this? Are you trying to get yourself kicked out then? Because if that’s what you want, you’re going about it the right way.”

“I don’t want that!” I finally managed, practically yelling. “I don’t want kicked out!”

One of the machines started making a weird beeping sound. Doc turned away from me and walked back to the computer console. I wasn’t really trying to look at her, but my gaze was in her direction, so I saw when she looked down at the monitors and then back up to me. Her face was slightly paler. “Jade…”

Linc looked from me to Doc. “What is it?”

My heart pounded faster and faster.

“Calm down, Jade.” Doc ran forward as I ripped the electrodes from my body and tossed them aside. “Just wait, and I’ll take them off for you.”

I kept pulling them away, and then yanked the IV from my arm.

Doc pulled a cotton ball from her pocket and tried putting it against my skin, to stop the trickle of blood from my arm, but I just dodged out of her way, unable to hold still another second.

“What are you doing, Jade?” Linc demanded.

“Linc! Leave her alone.”

I backed out of the scanner and away from Doc and Linc, shaking my head as I moved. I didn’t know what I was shaking it at, but I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t catch my breath, and white and black spots were floating all around me, like big pieces of dust.

“Jade,” Doc started, her tone calm as she slowly walked toward me, “let us help you. Just come sit down. We can talk about it. Whatever it is, we can fix it.”

“You can’t fix it!”

“We can try, Jade.”

“You can’t fix the dead!” I shouted. And then I did sit, but only because my legs collapsed underneath me. “You can’t bring them back. You can’t do anything. They’re just gone and nothing anyone does will change that. I can’t even find the stupid demon and get justice for them.” The words just poured out of my mouth and I couldn’t stop them. “I tried to find it, I did, but I can’t. I don’t remember enough about it, and the stupid books will only let me look through so many at a time. And—”

Doc glanced at Linc and whispered something to him.

My vision blurred from tears. “I can’t help them.”

“Jade.” Doc’s tone was soft, which, of course, made me cry even harder. “You need to calm down, Jade. Slow your breathing. In and out,” she coaxed.

Dimly, I realized I probably was breathing too fast. In my chest, my heart was still thundering like a racehorse on a track. I tried focusing on her words through the buzzing but it didn’t really help. My chest was actually hurting, my head was bounding, and I was really lightheaded. Catching my breath was nearly impossible.

The door opened and shut again a few minutes later and I heard multiple sets of footsteps.

Doc laid her hand on my arm briefly, but when I flinched, she stood and walked away. I heard Greene and Linc’s voices. They were all speaking in low tones. Normally, if I’d tried, I was sure I’d be able to hear their words. But I couldn’t now. I couldn’t hear anything over my harsh breathing and the buzzing in my ears.