Breathe for Me (17 page)

As she did he gripped her hips with both hands. Tight. His fingers dug into her flesh as he ruthlessly held her in place. He drove hard and deep and fast for another few strokes before he thrust hard one last time. The searing tension was audible in his loud groan and evident in the sharp spasms of his cock as he came deep inside.

A soft moment later he also stretched his arms over her desk so he lightly blanketed her. He kissed her shoulders. “Let’s take a bath. Make it wetter this time.”

Still dazed, it took a second to hear him. She stilled as he lifted away from her.

“Not a shower?” she asked softly.

But he’d already gone.
She could hear the taps running in her bathroom.
The sensual warmth left her as she followed the sounds.

He’d found some kind of bubble mixture from somewhere and made the bath a froth of white and rainbows. Anyone normal would think it was gorgeous and playful and be ready.
But she wasn’t normal. Not about this.

He looked at her, his brows lifted. “You don’t want to have a bath with me?”

He was naked. Glorious. And she should, she really knew she should. But she couldn’t. The thought of being submerged again? She couldn’t do it.

“I’d prefer a shower,” she whispered.

He looked at her for what felt like forever. He didn’t blink—nor did she.
 

He said nothing, he just watched, waiting. Did he think she was going to say something more?

She couldn’t. Her throat had tightened—all but closed over. All lingering relaxed relief from that quick sex was gone. All that was left, was cold.

Finally he turned and pulled the plug from the bath. “Sure.”

She exhaled, but remained on edge. Because he didn’t smile. Didn’t make some light joke.

Instead he walked right up close to her. “Would you prefer to shower alone?”

She swallowed. Nodded. Tried not to come across as the damaged woman she was. This was only supposed to be easy. “I’ll be quick.” She tried, but her words were little more than a stained whisper.

He shook his head. “Take your time, I’ve got some stuff I need to do tonight anyway.”

“Okay.”

Chelsea remained frozen just inside the bathroom door.
Two minutes later he’d left her apartment.

And she wasn’t sure he’d be coming back.

Chapter Twelve

Xander lifted his hand to knock on Chelsea’s door. Work had been a washout today, he’d hardly thought of anything other than her since the bath incident the night before. She hadn’t offered any explanation, but he needed to know. Okay, he already knew but he wished he didn’t. Because he wanted, needed,
her
to tell him. That mightn’t be part of their agreement, but too bad.

She was like the ultimate Groundhog Day present—getting to open her up night after night was a pleasure he anticipated from the moment he left her. Only now, heaven help him, he wanted to open up
all
her secret compartments. He wanted to see her sleep easy. Smile easy. Speak easy.

He knocked. She answered almost immediately. Her wary eyes widened when she saw it was him. She licked her lips quick—nervously. Instinctively he smiled at her, open and warm and reassuring. And eventually, as she looked up at him, her pale face flushed with a more normal color. An answering smile dawned on her full lips. And then it came—that sparkle of devilish anticipation flickered in her eyes.

But she said nothing.

He knew she was waiting—wanting—his instruction. But he wasn’t going there. Yet.

“Come out with me,” he said.

Her eyes instantly narrowed. “Out?” she repeated. “Where?”

“It’s a surprise,” he drawled.

She folded her arms beneath her curvy breasts. “I don’t like surprises.”

“Sure you do.” He grinned, happy she was making a stand. It meant she was more relaxed.

She glanced away and then back at him. He wondered if she was going to resist more seriously or, even better, come up with an alternative offer of her own. But he guessed she’d do neither.

It wasn’t that she was totally passive. If he put his finger in her mouth she sucked on it hard. She spread for him to take her only to then clench hot and fast and lock him in place. Her hands skimmed, teased, caressed him as he moved over her. She was absolutely into it. And he could tell from the sparkle in her eyes that she was thinking all kinds of things. There was so much going on in that brain of hers.

But she still didn’t instigate. The only time she’d
verbally
expressed a preference was about the bath last night and that hadn’t been a sensual request, that had come from fear. And though she was already generous, he knew she had more to give.

He wanted it—her secrets, her desires.

But for now, in bed and in this whole arrangement, she still needed him to take the lead. So he’d make it simple for her.

“If you want to come tonight,” he said, casually resting a shoulder on her door frame. “You’ll come with me now.”

“And if I don’t?”

Flames licked at his lower belly at the tiny hint of defiance in her tone. Yeah, he wanted to see her spirit finally come free. “No more fantasies. No more orgasms. Your choice.”

“You can give it up that easy?” she asked, sceptically raising her brows. “After only a few nights?”

He grinned. She was calling
him
on it.

Her arms tightened beneath her breasts and he couldn’t help noticing her nipples poking hard through her tank top. He glanced back up and encountered her stern look.

“You’re
that
confident,” she almost snarled.

“Let me show you why.” He straightened and pulled her close, boldly sliding his fingers under her skirt and up to the crotch of her silky panties. “You’re already wet for me,” he whispered. “Just as I’m already hard for you. I only have to think of you to get like this. So seeing you? Getting this close to you?” He shook his head. “Just hurry the hell up.”

Her eyes glinted, her chin lifted.

Go on.
He willed her.
Fight me. Challenge me. Dare me.

But she didn’t. She pushed away from him, turned and grabbed her handbag.

How was it possible to be satisfied and frustrated at the same time? Restraining his frustration, Xander double-checked her apartment was locked as they left. But he knew biding his time wasn’t possible. He was going to have to push a little harder. Take a little more. Demand a little more. Help a little more.

He led her to a cab and eyed her wickedly throughout the journey—refusing to answer the curiosity in her eyes. If she wasn’t going to ask, he wasn’t going to tell. And as much as this was a test of how things stood, it was also a game. Aggravating and thrilling.

She smiled blandly as the cab pulled up outside Rocco’s hotel but she still said nothing. She’d noticed the bag slung over his shoulder but hadn’t asked about that either. Determined not to cross boundaries, huh?

Too bad.

He led her to the lift, pushing the button once inside. She read the destination next to the number and stiffened.

“Relax.” He rolled his eyes to make light of it. “I thought you might like to watch a game,” he murmured. “You seemed to like looking at me in the water the other day.”

She sent him a tart look. “What an ego.”

“I know. But I’m right.” He knew he was right about her. She wanted back in.

Chelsea reluctantly followed Xander out of the elevator. In the distance she saw the pool. A bunch of guys stood nearby stripping down—not to trunks, but brief Speedos. Wow. Who knew Speedos could look so good? It was like she’d walked into a
Men’s Fitness
photo shoot. His running buddies were there and all looked straight at her.

“Why do I have to be with you for this?” She muttered, not really for him to hear. He’d not wanted her to meet his friends and she’d not wanted to either. It wasn’t part of the deal.

“Because I want you to,” he answered calmly.

She shouldn’t feel such a big bubble of pleasure at that. Wasn’t a night with her supposed to be ‘nothing’? She knew he’d said that to fob off his friend, but to a degree it was true. She was his fantasy fuckathon filly—his to ride when he liked. And she liked. An arrangement that wasn’t really
real
.

That’s what they’d
both
wanted. Many people had this kind of thing, right? Sexual partners with whom they were safe but not committed to and not really ‘intimate’ with? And for her who better than a guy like Xander who was both passionate and playful. She didn’t get why he was changing the boundaries now. Why take this out of her apartment?

She turned as he dropped his bag and whipped off his tee. Well he did have one thing right. She did like to look at him. He winked as his hands went to his belt.

Yeah.

She turned away, fighting the heat burning into her cheeks. She just wished they were outside. Even though the basement pool was brilliantly lit and there were plants and greenery to enhance the ‘natural’ feeling of the place, it oppressed her. She stared at the water—forgetting about the men, not hearing their chat and low laughs. It looked deep. Chills pressed into her.

“Chelsea?”

She hardly heard him.

“Breathe.” Bare-chested Xander stood right in front of her, blocking her view of the blue. He framed her face with his hands and brought her close for a kiss.

He sure kissed her. It was a kiss that offered more than the searing sensuality that always burned when they touched. There was a different kind of heat this time. A gentler warmth as his lips roved over hers, a comfort as his tongue tenderly stroked into the empty cavern of her mouth.

The cold receded, heat filled the empty spots that had been widening inside. She rose on tiptoe to keep him close. But he drew away, leaving her not just panting, but yearning. He turned away.

Belatedly she recollected the presence of the other guys. She glanced beyond Xander to them. Yeah, they’d seen that kiss—as if Xander had deliberately branded her as his.

Except it wasn’t that. He and she both knew he’d been distracting her. He’d aimed to soothe and stop her slide into panic. He knew that about her.

He knew she was afraid of the water.

And he’d wanted to help.

Uneasy, she sat on a chair well back from the pool and tried not to look conspicuous. There were a few other spectators but Chelsea had mastered the art of avoidance—cue phone out and head down. But once the whistle blew and the splashing started she couldn’t help watching the action.

Waterpolo was a fierce sport—she knew first hand. She knew how fit they had to be to keep treading water like that, how strong to be able to rear up so far out of the water, how adept to catch the ball one handed. They threw ferociously, swam fiercely. Nothing tame about it. But they were laughing as they dragged each other under. They scored quickly, relentlessly, joyously. They were having so much fun it was painful to watch. That’s when she went back to the phone and opened up a book app—she’d read. But she couldn’t concentrate. The shouts, the laughter, the cheers and jeers kept her looking up.

“You came with Xander?”

She nearly jumped out of her seat. She hadn’t noticed him walk over and stand beside her, she’d been too busy watching Xander firing the ball from one end of the pool to the other—and land a goal. But Logan—with the cheekbones and fallen angel eyes was right beside her. His expression was kind of fierce and he looked like he hadn’t shaved in a few days—even more the fallen angel.
 

Well she was not reacting to the double entendre.
Not
. He probably didn’t even mean it that way. Too childish. But the guy was smiling. A slightly familiar—fully wicked—grin.
 

“How do you know him?” she asked without thinking.

Logan’s gaze sharpened. “We’re cousins.”

So she hadn’t imagined the similarity. They were related. Only Logan’s hair was jet black compared to Xander’s brown and his ‘edge’ more pointed. She nodded casually but curiosity still bit. “And good friends?”

“We spent all our teen years together,” he said. “He, me and my brother. Anything more you’re going to have to worm out of him yourself.” Logan sent her another narrow-eyed look. “I’m sure you’ll figure out a way.”

What more was there? Obviously there was something because she read tension within Logan. The guy was protective of Xander, and somehow saw her as a possible threat? That she could hurt the guy? Didn’t Logan know Xander was all steel?

Interesting. Maybe even steel had a weakness, even it if it was used to protect and defend…
something
.

She glanced over to Xander—her curiosity flaring. He was out of the water and watching her, looking edgier than Logan ever could.

“Thought you’d decided to stick to legit sports.” He called to Logan, his voice had even more sharpness than his expression.

“Absolutely.” Logan grinned and walked back towards the pool.

Chelsea looked at Xander. His expression softened a touch before he turned to dive back into the pool and join his mates.