Bound Together (59 page)
Authors: Marie Coulson
Taking my feet off his
lap I stood and headed upstairs. “Layla, let’s at least talk about
this. You haven’t wanted to talk about it since you found out.
Please sweetheart.” I growled at her, stomping up the stairs as
though gravity just made everything ten times heavier. “Leave me
alone mother.” It wasn’t that I didn’t want my parents to be happy
but did they have to find happiness together? The divorce had been
a traumatic and life changing event for me. Watching my parent’s
marriage slowly fall apart at the seams and eventually tear into
two very large pieces had made me the strong, independent woman I
was now. And then there they go screwing it all up because they’re
in love? My whole belief system had been thrown into a shredder and
I was frantically scraping up the pieces and trying to make sense
of it all.
Slamming my bedroom door
behind me, I sprawled out on my bed, flung my arm over my eyes and
sighed deeply. A second later there was a tapping at my door. “I
said leave me alone mother!”
“
It’s me, can I come in?”
Ollie’s gentle tones melted my icy mood. “Of course you can Ollie.
It’s not you I’m mad at.” Opening the door, he stepped inside and
closed it behind him quietly. His voice hushed, he stood with his
back against the door gazing at me. “I really think you should give
your parents a break here Layla. They love each other. That’s the
bottom line and no amount of pissing and whining is going to change
that so you might as well get used to it. Hell I don’t even
understand why you’re so upset. At least you have two great parents
and the fact that they’re back under the same roof sounds awesome
to me.” I gave him a quizzical look. “Why are you whispering?” “I
don’t want your folks to catch me in your room.” I rolled my eyes
at him. “Ollie last night they caught us pre-coital on the couch. I
think the cat’s out of the bag.”
He ran his fingers
through his long black hair. “Oh, well I still think you should
hear your mom out. She was really upset you know. I think she was
crying.” Oh no. If there was one thing my mom did very well it was
cry and it always worked on me.
Feeling instantly guilty,
I groaned. “Oh crap. Now I have to go down there and apologize.
God, she’s so unfair! Why can’t she just let me be mad for a
while?”
Walking over, Ollie held
onto my hands and pulled me up. I stood in front of him and looked
up into his big brown eyes and sighed. “You will forgive her you
know. Because you’re too nice to hate anyone really. Even when you
should.” He gave me his trademark, knock your socks off sexy smile
and I couldn’t resist him. My hands around his neck, I pulled him
to me and kissed him longingly. I loved the feel of his piercing
against my lip and every time it pressed into my flesh, I had the
desperate urge to sink my teeth into him. His hands snaked around
my back as I pulled him towards the bed. The back of my knees hit
the edge and falling back onto the mattress, I hauled him down with
me. I just couldn’t help myself. As his tongue and lips caressed my
jaw and his fingertips traced freely over my neck, I groaned.
Whenever Ollie’s hot body was in the same room as mine my blood
simmered and my insides clenched with desire. He’d always had an
effect on me but it seemed the more time we spent around each
other, the more I wanted him. I wanted him so much it was driving
me crazy.
My body and my heart were
clearly not on the same page. My heart was still hibernating and
rocking in a corner suffering with post-traumatic stress, while my
libido did the Lambada whenever the young, smoking hot, wanna be
rocker was around me. It was a confusing combination and at that
moment, my head seemed to be listening to my body, disregarding the
violent warnings my heart was sending as it thudded and drummed
loudly inside my ribcage.
Closing my eyes, I
surrendered myself to the pleasure of his touch. His tongue grazed
my skin, making goose bumps appear all over me. His hands held mine
arrested on either side of my head. “Oh god Layla, I love you so
much,” he murmured into my mouth and as if my heart had grabbed for
a megaphone it screamed at me to stop this. My eyes instantly flew
open. Springing up, I pushed him off of me. “Wait!”
Falling onto the floor,
he stared up at me, panting and completely confused at my outburst.
Holding my head in my hands I shook my head. “I’m sorry Ollie, I
am, and I want to, I really do, you have no idea how much but I
just…can’t.”
His eyebrows furrowed and
he looked wounded. “But….
you
kissed me.
You
pulled me down. I wasn’t pressuring you Layla.
You said you wanted this. Us.”
Rushing to him I fell to
my knees on the floor beside him. “I do, I really do and we will
get there but right now, I just can’t.” Staring straight ahead, his
mouth pressed into a hard line “You love him don’t you. I’m never
going to be enough am I Layla?”
“
Ollie no. You’re amazing
and I really like you. I do.”
“
But
you
love
him.”
Gazing at him I nodded,
there was no point in trying to deny it. We both knew the truth.
Ollie could hold my body for hours but he wouldn’t possess my heart
while it still stayed firmly in Jared’s grasp. Getting to his feet,
he strode silently to the door and walked out. I followed, yelling
after him as we descended the stairs. “Ollie wait.”
Grabbing his hoodie, he
headed for the front door. “Where are you going?”
“
I need a
walk.”
“
But you don’t know these
streets.”
“
I’ll figure it out.” And
without a single glance in my direction he walked out, slamming the
door behind him.
I flinched as the loud
bang reverberated through the hall. Sinking onto the bottom step, I
hung my head and cried. I’d done the one thing I didn’t want to.
I’d hurt him. I’d led him on, teased and seduced him just to end up
emotionally kicking him in the crotch and driving him away. God, I
really was a bitch. Hearing the commotion, my mother had left the
sanctuary of the kitchen and was now hurrying to my side. Wrapping
her arms around me she pulled me tight to her chest. “Oh baby, what
happened?” Sniffling and whimpering, I looked up at her through
teary eyes.
“
I’ve made such a mess of
everything. I’m a horrible person.”
“
No you’re not. You,
Layla Jennings, don’t have a spiteful bone in your body. Now come
on, what’s this all about?”
Taking a deep breath I
tried to explain. “Ollie’s in love with me.”
“
Well sweetheart I could
have told you that at the party.”
“
I knew before that and I
knew how deeply he felt but I tried to pretend it wasn’t happening.
Then this whole thing with Jared happened and the other night,
after the park, I kissed him. I kissed Ollie and we started getting
carried away. He said he wanted to be with me and I said that I’d
try. But I can’t do it mom. Every time I’m with him, I want to be
with him so much but my heart just can’t let go of Jared. And now
I’ve hurt Ollie. Why does my broken heart keep making so many lives
miserable?”
Rising to her feet, my
mother gazed down at me and lifted my face to her with her
perfectly manicured hand. “Now you listen to me Layla Jennings.
Love is easy, falling in love is even easier, but letting that love
go, is the most difficult thing you’ll ever have to do. Some of us
never let it go and sometimes it takes a while to realize what you
want. But your heart will always have the right answer in the end.
You just have to figure out what it’s telling you. You like
Ollie?”
I nodded and she
smiled.
“
He’s a sweet boy and I
think if you’re patient with each other, you and he could be very
happy. But you will always remember your first love. It’s powerful.
Don’t punish yourself for feeling sweetheart.” I glanced at the
door, wishing he’d come back.
“
Let him breathe, he’ll
be back. And very soon I’ll wager. He’s crazy about you Layla. As
he should be.”
I gave her a half-hearted
smile and the deep feeling of regret washed over me. I’d been so
unfair to her and sitting on those stairs I could finally
understand. You can’t just tell your heart to stop loving someone.
It’s a force that no man, woman or living being can control. And my
parent’s hearts had always belonged to each other. “I’m sorry Mom.
For everything I said and didn’t say. I am happy you and dad are
together, just, please don’t break his heart again. I couldn’t bear
it.” Kissing my cheek, she smiled. “Neither could I.”
stared at the clock. The room was silent except for the infernal
and constant ticking as I watched minutes turn into hours. Ollie
had been gone for almost two hours and I was beginning to feel
anxious that something had happened to him. Springing from the
couch, I grabbed my sneakers and was just about to run out to look
for him when the door opened.
I stood abruptly and
stared at him speechless. What could I say?
Walking over he gazed
down at me and wiped my tearstained cheek with his thumb. “Oh god.
I swore I’d never make you cry.” Wrapping his arms around me, he
pressed a kiss to my head and sighed. I buried my head into his
chest and breathed deeply. He smelled of laundry detergent mixed
with his natural Ollie smell. I found it incredibly comforting and
if I could have bottled it, I would’ve carried it around wherever I
went. Tears were once again sliding down my face and seeping into
his hoodie. Lifting my chin, he smiled at me. “I want you Layla.
And if I have to wait ten years for you to be ready I will. We can
take this as slow as you want and there’s no pressure. I just want
to be with you.”
Fisting the hem of his
sweater in his hand he lifted it to my face and wiped my tears.
“That’s better.”
I smiled and even laughed
slightly as he stroked his nose along the length of mine. “I’m not
saying never Ollie. I just can’t be with anyone else physically
right now. But I
will
get there. You just have to be patient with me.”
He placed a chaste kiss
on my lips. “I’d wait forever for you Layla. I love
you.”
His words swirled around
in my head. Hearing those three little words stirred emotions
inside me that should have been for the man who had spoken them so
sweetly to me. But they didn’t. Instead all I felt was a sharp pain
as the memory of Jared’s own low, sensual voice echoed in my ears.
Three words had never meant so much as when he had spoken them to
me and if I was truly honest with myself, I missed him.
it slow I made it my mission to ensure that Ollie and I were
constantly in the company of others, and in this instance that
responsibility fell on Mel. Tonight was movie night and the three
of us would be sitting down nice and cozy in a dark theater
together for a whole two hours. “And why do I need to be your third
wheel all winter break?”
Pulling on my sweater I
shook my head. “You’re not the third wheel, more a buffer. Look,
Ollie and I are just finding our feet right now and I’m not ready
for a relationship. We’re taking it slow and that’s where you come
in.”
“
Because you don’t trust
yourself not to jump his rock god, sex on legs, fuck me till I’m
brain dead bones?”
“
Uh,
something like…
that
.”
She rolled her eyes at me
and began rifling through my makeup case, testing several different
shades of lipstick before deciding none were her desired color.
“Well you’ll have to be alone with him eventually you know. It’s
been what, four days since you decided to slow things down? What do
you do when I go home at night?”
“
Take a cold shower and
repeat my MC Hammer mantra.” She roared with laughter. “MC
Hammer?”
I giggled. “Yeah, you
know, can’t touch this.” Clutching her stomach she rolled on the
floor, laughing at me.
I gave her a playful
shove and laughed with her. “Pull yourself together for god sakes
woman. We’d better get down stairs before he thinks we’ve abandoned
him.”
Panting, she nodded. “Or
deprived him of a girl on girl experience.”
Now I was laughing.
Ollie’s voice echoed up the stairs at us. “Hey are you two hyenas
coming to see this movie or what?” He groaned as Mel yelled out the
door at him. “Yeah we’ll be right there hipster dick, don’t get
your mascara all runny over it.”
“
Fuck you ginger
pubes.”
“
You too, Max Factor.
Isn’t Ollie great Layla?”
I giggled at her sarcasm
and dragged her out of the room to join him downstairs. “’Bout
fucking time. Seriously how long does it take to get dressed for a
movie?”
Slipping on her shoes Mel
poked her tongue out at him. “We had to pick the right outfit and
do our makeup, which by the way Layla didn’t get to do because you
were screaming up the staircase.”
Walking up to me he
kissed me softly on the tip of my nose. “It’s dark in there so no
one’s gonna see you snaggletooth. Besides, Layla doesn’t need it.
Baby girl’s beautiful all the time.” I smiled and glanced at Mel
who was rolling her eyes at him. “Oh god Ollie, seriously dude, get
your tongue out of her ass already and let’s go.”
lap I stood and headed upstairs. “Layla, let’s at least talk about
this. You haven’t wanted to talk about it since you found out.
Please sweetheart.” I growled at her, stomping up the stairs as
though gravity just made everything ten times heavier. “Leave me
alone mother.” It wasn’t that I didn’t want my parents to be happy
but did they have to find happiness together? The divorce had been
a traumatic and life changing event for me. Watching my parent’s
marriage slowly fall apart at the seams and eventually tear into
two very large pieces had made me the strong, independent woman I
was now. And then there they go screwing it all up because they’re
in love? My whole belief system had been thrown into a shredder and
I was frantically scraping up the pieces and trying to make sense
of it all.
Slamming my bedroom door
behind me, I sprawled out on my bed, flung my arm over my eyes and
sighed deeply. A second later there was a tapping at my door. “I
said leave me alone mother!”
“
It’s me, can I come in?”
Ollie’s gentle tones melted my icy mood. “Of course you can Ollie.
It’s not you I’m mad at.” Opening the door, he stepped inside and
closed it behind him quietly. His voice hushed, he stood with his
back against the door gazing at me. “I really think you should give
your parents a break here Layla. They love each other. That’s the
bottom line and no amount of pissing and whining is going to change
that so you might as well get used to it. Hell I don’t even
understand why you’re so upset. At least you have two great parents
and the fact that they’re back under the same roof sounds awesome
to me.” I gave him a quizzical look. “Why are you whispering?” “I
don’t want your folks to catch me in your room.” I rolled my eyes
at him. “Ollie last night they caught us pre-coital on the couch. I
think the cat’s out of the bag.”
He ran his fingers
through his long black hair. “Oh, well I still think you should
hear your mom out. She was really upset you know. I think she was
crying.” Oh no. If there was one thing my mom did very well it was
cry and it always worked on me.
Feeling instantly guilty,
I groaned. “Oh crap. Now I have to go down there and apologize.
God, she’s so unfair! Why can’t she just let me be mad for a
while?”
Walking over, Ollie held
onto my hands and pulled me up. I stood in front of him and looked
up into his big brown eyes and sighed. “You will forgive her you
know. Because you’re too nice to hate anyone really. Even when you
should.” He gave me his trademark, knock your socks off sexy smile
and I couldn’t resist him. My hands around his neck, I pulled him
to me and kissed him longingly. I loved the feel of his piercing
against my lip and every time it pressed into my flesh, I had the
desperate urge to sink my teeth into him. His hands snaked around
my back as I pulled him towards the bed. The back of my knees hit
the edge and falling back onto the mattress, I hauled him down with
me. I just couldn’t help myself. As his tongue and lips caressed my
jaw and his fingertips traced freely over my neck, I groaned.
Whenever Ollie’s hot body was in the same room as mine my blood
simmered and my insides clenched with desire. He’d always had an
effect on me but it seemed the more time we spent around each
other, the more I wanted him. I wanted him so much it was driving
me crazy.
My body and my heart were
clearly not on the same page. My heart was still hibernating and
rocking in a corner suffering with post-traumatic stress, while my
libido did the Lambada whenever the young, smoking hot, wanna be
rocker was around me. It was a confusing combination and at that
moment, my head seemed to be listening to my body, disregarding the
violent warnings my heart was sending as it thudded and drummed
loudly inside my ribcage.
Closing my eyes, I
surrendered myself to the pleasure of his touch. His tongue grazed
my skin, making goose bumps appear all over me. His hands held mine
arrested on either side of my head. “Oh god Layla, I love you so
much,” he murmured into my mouth and as if my heart had grabbed for
a megaphone it screamed at me to stop this. My eyes instantly flew
open. Springing up, I pushed him off of me. “Wait!”
Falling onto the floor,
he stared up at me, panting and completely confused at my outburst.
Holding my head in my hands I shook my head. “I’m sorry Ollie, I
am, and I want to, I really do, you have no idea how much but I
just…can’t.”
His eyebrows furrowed and
he looked wounded. “But….
you
kissed me.
You
pulled me down. I wasn’t pressuring you Layla.
You said you wanted this. Us.”
Rushing to him I fell to
my knees on the floor beside him. “I do, I really do and we will
get there but right now, I just can’t.” Staring straight ahead, his
mouth pressed into a hard line “You love him don’t you. I’m never
going to be enough am I Layla?”
“
Ollie no. You’re amazing
and I really like you. I do.”
“
But
you
love
him.”
Gazing at him I nodded,
there was no point in trying to deny it. We both knew the truth.
Ollie could hold my body for hours but he wouldn’t possess my heart
while it still stayed firmly in Jared’s grasp. Getting to his feet,
he strode silently to the door and walked out. I followed, yelling
after him as we descended the stairs. “Ollie wait.”
Grabbing his hoodie, he
headed for the front door. “Where are you going?”
“
I need a
walk.”
“
But you don’t know these
streets.”
“
I’ll figure it out.” And
without a single glance in my direction he walked out, slamming the
door behind him.
I flinched as the loud
bang reverberated through the hall. Sinking onto the bottom step, I
hung my head and cried. I’d done the one thing I didn’t want to.
I’d hurt him. I’d led him on, teased and seduced him just to end up
emotionally kicking him in the crotch and driving him away. God, I
really was a bitch. Hearing the commotion, my mother had left the
sanctuary of the kitchen and was now hurrying to my side. Wrapping
her arms around me she pulled me tight to her chest. “Oh baby, what
happened?” Sniffling and whimpering, I looked up at her through
teary eyes.
“
I’ve made such a mess of
everything. I’m a horrible person.”
“
No you’re not. You,
Layla Jennings, don’t have a spiteful bone in your body. Now come
on, what’s this all about?”
Taking a deep breath I
tried to explain. “Ollie’s in love with me.”
“
Well sweetheart I could
have told you that at the party.”
“
I knew before that and I
knew how deeply he felt but I tried to pretend it wasn’t happening.
Then this whole thing with Jared happened and the other night,
after the park, I kissed him. I kissed Ollie and we started getting
carried away. He said he wanted to be with me and I said that I’d
try. But I can’t do it mom. Every time I’m with him, I want to be
with him so much but my heart just can’t let go of Jared. And now
I’ve hurt Ollie. Why does my broken heart keep making so many lives
miserable?”
Rising to her feet, my
mother gazed down at me and lifted my face to her with her
perfectly manicured hand. “Now you listen to me Layla Jennings.
Love is easy, falling in love is even easier, but letting that love
go, is the most difficult thing you’ll ever have to do. Some of us
never let it go and sometimes it takes a while to realize what you
want. But your heart will always have the right answer in the end.
You just have to figure out what it’s telling you. You like
Ollie?”
I nodded and she
smiled.
“
He’s a sweet boy and I
think if you’re patient with each other, you and he could be very
happy. But you will always remember your first love. It’s powerful.
Don’t punish yourself for feeling sweetheart.” I glanced at the
door, wishing he’d come back.
“
Let him breathe, he’ll
be back. And very soon I’ll wager. He’s crazy about you Layla. As
he should be.”
I gave her a half-hearted
smile and the deep feeling of regret washed over me. I’d been so
unfair to her and sitting on those stairs I could finally
understand. You can’t just tell your heart to stop loving someone.
It’s a force that no man, woman or living being can control. And my
parent’s hearts had always belonged to each other. “I’m sorry Mom.
For everything I said and didn’t say. I am happy you and dad are
together, just, please don’t break his heart again. I couldn’t bear
it.” Kissing my cheek, she smiled. “Neither could I.”
* * *
stared at the clock. The room was silent except for the infernal
and constant ticking as I watched minutes turn into hours. Ollie
had been gone for almost two hours and I was beginning to feel
anxious that something had happened to him. Springing from the
couch, I grabbed my sneakers and was just about to run out to look
for him when the door opened.
I stood abruptly and
stared at him speechless. What could I say?
Walking over he gazed
down at me and wiped my tearstained cheek with his thumb. “Oh god.
I swore I’d never make you cry.” Wrapping his arms around me, he
pressed a kiss to my head and sighed. I buried my head into his
chest and breathed deeply. He smelled of laundry detergent mixed
with his natural Ollie smell. I found it incredibly comforting and
if I could have bottled it, I would’ve carried it around wherever I
went. Tears were once again sliding down my face and seeping into
his hoodie. Lifting my chin, he smiled at me. “I want you Layla.
And if I have to wait ten years for you to be ready I will. We can
take this as slow as you want and there’s no pressure. I just want
to be with you.”
Fisting the hem of his
sweater in his hand he lifted it to my face and wiped my tears.
“That’s better.”
I smiled and even laughed
slightly as he stroked his nose along the length of mine. “I’m not
saying never Ollie. I just can’t be with anyone else physically
right now. But I
will
get there. You just have to be patient with me.”
He placed a chaste kiss
on my lips. “I’d wait forever for you Layla. I love
you.”
His words swirled around
in my head. Hearing those three little words stirred emotions
inside me that should have been for the man who had spoken them so
sweetly to me. But they didn’t. Instead all I felt was a sharp pain
as the memory of Jared’s own low, sensual voice echoed in my ears.
Three words had never meant so much as when he had spoken them to
me and if I was truly honest with myself, I missed him.
* * *
it slow I made it my mission to ensure that Ollie and I were
constantly in the company of others, and in this instance that
responsibility fell on Mel. Tonight was movie night and the three
of us would be sitting down nice and cozy in a dark theater
together for a whole two hours. “And why do I need to be your third
wheel all winter break?”
Pulling on my sweater I
shook my head. “You’re not the third wheel, more a buffer. Look,
Ollie and I are just finding our feet right now and I’m not ready
for a relationship. We’re taking it slow and that’s where you come
in.”
“
Because you don’t trust
yourself not to jump his rock god, sex on legs, fuck me till I’m
brain dead bones?”
“
Uh,
something like…
that
.”
She rolled her eyes at me
and began rifling through my makeup case, testing several different
shades of lipstick before deciding none were her desired color.
“Well you’ll have to be alone with him eventually you know. It’s
been what, four days since you decided to slow things down? What do
you do when I go home at night?”
“
Take a cold shower and
repeat my MC Hammer mantra.” She roared with laughter. “MC
Hammer?”
I giggled. “Yeah, you
know, can’t touch this.” Clutching her stomach she rolled on the
floor, laughing at me.
I gave her a playful
shove and laughed with her. “Pull yourself together for god sakes
woman. We’d better get down stairs before he thinks we’ve abandoned
him.”
Panting, she nodded. “Or
deprived him of a girl on girl experience.”
Now I was laughing.
Ollie’s voice echoed up the stairs at us. “Hey are you two hyenas
coming to see this movie or what?” He groaned as Mel yelled out the
door at him. “Yeah we’ll be right there hipster dick, don’t get
your mascara all runny over it.”
“
Fuck you ginger
pubes.”
“
You too, Max Factor.
Isn’t Ollie great Layla?”
I giggled at her sarcasm
and dragged her out of the room to join him downstairs. “’Bout
fucking time. Seriously how long does it take to get dressed for a
movie?”
Slipping on her shoes Mel
poked her tongue out at him. “We had to pick the right outfit and
do our makeup, which by the way Layla didn’t get to do because you
were screaming up the staircase.”
Walking up to me he
kissed me softly on the tip of my nose. “It’s dark in there so no
one’s gonna see you snaggletooth. Besides, Layla doesn’t need it.
Baby girl’s beautiful all the time.” I smiled and glanced at Mel
who was rolling her eyes at him. “Oh god Ollie, seriously dude, get
your tongue out of her ass already and let’s go.”
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