Bound To Her Bear (Bear Bluff Clan 1) (4 page)

The leaves were starting to look tired and old; autumn would soon be upon them, and then winter. How wonderful it would be to curl up in front of a log fire with a man like Eirik. To feel his arms about her and lean back against his large chest, feeling safe and cherished.

As she walked, Drew allowed herself to examine her disappointment at not going out with him. She didn’t reprimand herself for wanting to spend time with him rather than her father. At her age, it was only right she would want other people’s company. On the whole, she was surrounded by old men. Her father and her boss were the two people she spent most of her time with. Only when people came into the office did she speak to anyone her own age, and then it was just about work.

Crossing the street, she caught sight of a woman about her age pushing a buggy. That’s what a lot of her friends were doing now, having found their mates and settled down. Everyone seemed to have moved on. Yet, between her dad and the loss of her mother, Drew felt she hadn’t so much moved on as moved backwards. This was the time of her life when she was supposed to be young, free, and single, not chained to a desk and then to a sink when she got home.

Self-pity, that was all it was. Not quite. The real reason she felt miserable was that as much as she loved her dad, she had been really looking forward to going out. But her duty lay at home.

“Hi,” she called as she opened the front door and went inside. Silence met her. “Dad?”

Her heart sank.
Don’t say he had already succumbed to the bottle of ever-present whiskey.
Going through into the sitting room, she half expected him to be passed out, drunk. There was no one there. Maybe he had gone to bed. Unusual, he never got that far in the day. The sofa was where he would crash and stay for an hour or two before he got up to start all over again. The sofa might just as well have been his bed actually, because that was where he would stay all night, more often than not. The reason was clear to Drew; he hated going upstairs to his empty room. She could only imagine how unbearable that empty bed was.

“Dad,” she called louder, listening for any sound from upstairs. Then movement in the backyard made her stop and look out. There he was.

Tears pricked her eyes; he was working diligently at pulling the weeds out around her mom’s favourite roses. Placing her purse down on the countertop, she went to the fridge, grabbed two cold sodas and headed out into the late afternoon sun.

“Wow, you have been busy,” she said, handing the cold drink to her dad.

“Once I got into it, I couldn’t stop.” He took a gulp of the drink and then said, “Thanks, that was just what I needed. I can’t believe I let her down by not keeping on top of the weeds.”

“Hey, Dad,” Drew said, rubbing his back as though he were the child. “She would understand. Now, what do you want me to do?”

“Want to prune back that shrub? It’s getting a bit out of hand and will block the light out. Can’t let these roses die. I bought her this one on our first anniversary.”

“She told me, Dad. And this one when I was born,” Drew said, touching the waxy leaves.

“She loved you so much,” he said quietly.

“She loved us both very much. I know I’m not as good around the house as she was, but together we can get everything back together.”

He put his arm around her shoulders. “You’ve done enough. Until I find a job, I’m going to look after the house and do the shopping. Although you might have to come with me a few times until I get the hang of it.”

“Sure thing. I would love to.”

He kissed the top of her head, a sob shuddering through him. She looked away, letting him regain control. He was never one to show his feelings, not these kind of feelings anyway. That was his problem: he bottled them up and then drowned them in liquor until they went away.

“Right,” he said, taking another mouthful of his soda. “Let’s get started.”

She smiled at his new-found enthusiasm and joined him in trying to get the garden back to how it was. Perhaps it might be symbolic of their lives. By pulling this part of her mom’s memory back together, they might be able to patch over the tangled remains of the rest of their lives without her.

It was dusk by the time they had finished, neither of them noticing the passing time. Drew stood up and stretched. Her back ached and she longed to soak in the bath, but her stomach told her dinner would have to come first. Unbidden thoughts of Eirik came to her, but she brushed them aside. Her dad needed her support, Eirik would wait. Or move on.

“I’ll go and start dinner,” she said.

Her dad was putting the tools away. “Oh, damn I forgot I said I would cook.”

“It’s no problem; I’ll fix us something quick.” She went inside, going to the bathroom to wash her hands. Looking in the mirror, she brushed her long auburn hair back from her face. She had caught the sun; her skin, usually so pale from spending too much time indoors, had a healthy glow. Turning her head, she looked at the bruise; it didn’t look as bad anymore. One or two more days and it should have gone completely. At least if it had been the catalyst for her dad’s transformation, it was worth it.

Drying her hands, she made her way to the kitchen, almost missing the knock on the door. Frowning, she went to open it, wondering who would be calling. No one called here, not any more. Perhaps it was her boss—maybe he needed her to open up in the morning—but usually he phoned. Pulling the door open, she was stunned to see Eirik in jeans and a shirt. Behind him stood his mom with a covered dish.

“Eirik, Mrs. McCormac.” There really wasn’t anything else she could think of to say.

“Hi, Drew,” Mrs. McCormac said, “Eirik said he had asked you out, but you didn’t want to leave your dad alone. So I thought I would come over and keep him company while you two kids go out.”

“We’re not kids, Mom,” Eirik said, but winked at Drew. “My mom really wanted some company and I wasn’t good enough.”

“That’s not true,” Mrs. McCormac said. Behind Drew, her dad appeared. “Ah, here’s your father, he will back me up on this, won’t you, Vic?”

“Marjorie, a nice surprise, what can we do for you? Hi, Eirik.”

“Evening, Mr. Stanton,” Eirik said politely. Drew hid a smile; it was as if they were school kids waiting for permission to go out on a date.

“I wondered if you would mind my company tonight instead of Drew’s. Only Eirik would like to take Drew out,” Mrs. McCormac added quietly. “I hope you don’t mind. Eirik doesn’t go out much, so I thought he needed a push.”

“I understand. Come on in. We were just about to put some dinner on.”

“Well, I made a casserole.” She lifted the lid and the smell made Drew’s mouth water. Her dad obviously felt the same way.

“That smells like heaven. Drew, you go and get changed and head out with Eirik.”

“Are you sure, Dad?”

“Absolutely. Go, it’s time you had some fun.” Then he said to Mrs. McCormac, “Kids these days. They don’t know how to have fun if it doesn’t involve a smartphone or some other electrical gadget.”

And just like that, Drew was left standing looking at Eirik, her heart fluttering in her chest.

“I’m sorry. She insisted,” Eirik said with a crooked smile.

“Because you don’t get out much?” Drew teased

He grinned. “She’s right. I haven’t been out with a woman for months.”

“Then I am honoured to be the one to break your dry run.”

“Go and get changed and we’ll go out and leave them to talk. Did you know they used to work together?”

“No. My dad never said, but then he had no reason to.”

“It seems they used to share lunch occasionally and talk about books.”

“Books? My dad hasn’t read a book for years.”

“The classics, apparently. Anyway, let’s go.” He ushered her up the stairs.

Then he waited. He was tempted to go and see how his mom was getting on, but decided he would leave them alone. He wanted to take Drew out and if he wasn’t careful, he knew it would be too easy to settle down and stay in instead. His mom’s casserole was the best he had ever tasted and he was hungry. As if in agreement, his stomach gave an earth-shattering rumble. He only hoped Drew wasn’t like most women: if she took an hour to get ready, he would begin to waste away. He had made up his mind to take her out of Bear Bluff to a restaurant that served the best steak for miles. Well, a bear needed good meat to keep his energy up.

But after ten minutes, she appeared, looking radiant. Although her hair was still brushed forward to hide the bruise over her eye. With that thought, his conscience rattled him. What if Drew’s dad was violent? He was leaving his mom here with a man he hardly knew. A ripple of laughter came from the kitchen. And he pushed his fears to one side. But as he looked up at Drew, he saw her stop and stare at the door.

“You OK, Drew?”

“Y...yes. It’s just ... I haven’t heard him laugh since...”

He walked forward and put his arm on her elbow, his thumb brushing against the tender soft skin there; she turned and looked at him. “Let’s leave them alone. I bet they are both pleased to have someone to talk to other than their kids.”

“Thank you, Eirik; it was sweet of you to ask your mom to come over.”

“Not my idea. My mom practically dragged me out of the house.”

“So you are taking me out to please her?”

“Don’t twist my words, Drew. I am taking you out for purely selfish reasons.”

But he didn’t tell her what they were. Not yet.

“You look beautiful, incidentally,” he said as he held the car door open for her.

“Thank you,” she said, glad he couldn’t see her blushing furiously. No man, apart from her dad, had ever complimented her over anything.

“I thought we would leave Bear Bluff for a couple of hours. Is that OK with you?”

“Sure. I guess it’s one way to stop people seeing us.”

“I’m not ashamed to be out with you, Drew, if that’s what you meant.”

“No,” she quickly replied, but that was pretty much what she was saying.

“I just thought it would be good to leave the place behind. As much as I like living here, I would love to travel some, too.”

“Where would you go, if you had the choice?”

“You mean if I wasn’t tied to the council?”

“Yes. If you had no responsibilities and could go where you wanted.”

“Hmm. Well, I always wanted to see the ocean.”

“You’ve never seen the ocean?”

“Not in real life. My dad was always stuck in Bear Bluff, and we never went on vacation. He had this fear that his bear would take control and he would expose himself and the rest of us to the public.”

“Didn’t he have full control of the change?”

“I never saw him lose control. But now I know that he mated with another bear ... you know. I think maybe it controlled him more than he controlled it. For most of us, our human consciousness is in complete control.”

“I wouldn’t always say complete control.”

“I suppose there are times when my bear rolls in something I would rather not have to smell,” he said lightly. “But on the whole, you can stop yourself doing things that you know are questionable.”

“Like biting someone’s head off.”

“Exactly. Your moral compass is still firmly fixed in the human world. Right?”

“Yes. Although there are times when the compulsion to do something you know you shouldn’t is tough.”

“I can’t imagine you losing control. You always seem so sure of yourself.”

She burst out laughing. “That is the opposite of how I see myself. I have no control over my life.”

“So what would you change?”

“Oh. I don't know. My job, for one.”

“I thought you liked working there.”

“It’s good, steady money and my boss is great. But it’s not what I want to do for the rest of my life.”

“It won’t be. When you settle down with your mate and have cubs, you’ll give it up surely?”

“OK. First of all, just because a woman finds her mate, it does not mean she has to give up her job. And secondly ... I have no plans to find my mate.”

He turned and looked at her, his eyes scrutinising her face. “Why?” was all he asked when he eventually spoke.

“Look at my dad.”

“And?”

“What do you mean
and
?”

“Which part of me looking at your dad, would tell me why you don’t want a mate? Is it because you have to care for him? Or because you don’t want to end up a wreck if you find your soul mate and they die?”

“Both.” Her voice was thin and weak.

“You’re scared?”

“Aren’t you? Your mom is in the same situation.”

“But she hasn’t given up on life. What about you and your dad? Don’t you have each other? If your mom or dad had not decided to stay with their mate, you would never have been born, and that would have been a travesty.”

They had pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant. He switched off the engine and turned to look at her. “Drew, don’t hide from the woman you are meant to be.”

“And what kind of woman is that? Because at the moment I don’t feel like much.”

He lifted his hand and stroked her hair, his thumb brushing her cheek. “That’s not how I see you, Drew. To me, you are brave. Picking up when your mom died and getting on with it. Looking after your dad.”

“I didn’t do anything special.”

“If I remember correctly, you always sold yourself short at school.”

“I didn’t know you even noticed me at school.”

“Oh, I noticed. I just didn’t ever feel comfortable making a pass at you. When we’re not mates. It just seemed ... unchivalrous.” She laughed and he slumped back in his seat. “I sound more like Ben every day. I swear, that guy is from the Middle Ages.”

“Listen, Eirik, I’m starving, can we drop this and just enjoy this evening?”

“Yes. I’m sorry, I think I’m being too forward. Since we met up again I can’t deny that you make feel different from anyone else I’ve ever met.”

“But we’re not mates,” she stated firmly, although she might just have hoped he felt differently, that she had missed the signs that they were true mates. There was no way she could deny she had feelings for him.