Bound by Honor (15 page)

"Jenna." Hoo'ma rested her thin arms on the edge of the long table. "If what you say is true ... is there anything we can do to help you and Gage to work things out?"

The thought of Gage sent pain spearing through Jenna. She frowned, trying to figure out how to answer the woman's question. She wished there was something they could do. But there wasn't.

Gage was trapped. H
eld down by a past mired in grief and guilt. Jenna had tried to free him. She'd tried to make him envision
an optimistic future. But he was wearing blinders, it seemed. She couldn't fix this for him.

She felt badly for Gage. Her heart ached for him, for his inability to move forward, but she was determined to do what was best for Lily. To make a hopeful future for her niece. And if that meant letting go of what she couldn't fix, then so be it.

Finally, she shook her head. "I appreciate your concern, your willingness to help. But there's nothing anyone can do."

That was all she intended to say on the subject. What had taken place between her and Gage was their business.

She stood tall. "I want you to know that I'll do everything in my power to see to it that Lily's life is steeped in Lenape culture. I'll bring her to the reservation often. We'll attend the celebrations and festivals. I truly want her to be a part of this community. To be a part of this family. As she gets older, I promise to —"

"You're lying," Chee'pai said, slapping the table sharply with his palm. "We cannot believe anything that you say."

Hoo'ma's normally calm demeanor cracked. "Chee'pai, I will not permit this rudeness."

The shaman's haughtiness had returned
full force. "I know she is lying. Because Gage told me their marriage was not a love match. He called their marriage an arrangement, and that is proof that the union was not based on the foundation Jenna is claiming."

Jenna was unable to stop her ragged gasp. She'd never felt so betrayed. Yes, she and Gage had experienced bumpy moments over the weeks she'd lived in his home, but she'd thought they had at least become friends. She'd never expected him to reveal the truth about their marriage bargain to his grandfather.

"And if she would lie to us about her marriage to my grandson," Chee'pai said, "then she'll lie to us about her plans for the baby. Lily Collins belongs here. On Broken Bow. Among her Lenape family."

The room went eerily quiet.

Hoo'ma, whom Jenna had felt certain she had won over, now looked at her with grave doubt. The other Council members gazed at her, their suspicion evident.

Fear crept over Jenna. A fear that was as bleak and cold as the dead of winter.

"May I approach the Council table?"

The sound of Gage's voice had Jenna whipping around. His handsome features looked set in stone as he
walked from the back of the ro
om

How long had he been there? How much had he heard? Had he witnessed her profession of love?

The questions made her dizzy. But then anger took hold.

The person coming toward her had abandoned her. He'd broken both her faith and her trust. He had divulged their secret when he knew full well that doing so would cost her custody of Lily.

The fury inside her burned white-hot.

Then she noticed that he looked angry, too.

"What are you doing here?" she said, her voice grating. "I told you not to come."

He brushed past her and stalked toward the Elders, stopping in front of his grandfather. "I ask for permission to speak."

Chapter Ten

"Of course, Gage," Hoo'ma said gently. "Let me welcome you on behalf of the Council. I think it's safe to say that we'd all be pleased to hear whatever it is you wish to tell us."

Before Gage could speak, Chee'pai said, "Yes, Gage, tell us the truth. All of us are eager to know. Did you marry Jenna out of choice?"

Although his back was to Jenna, Gage could feel her gaze boring into him. Lying to the Elders would be an egregious disrespect. A black mark on his character and his soul.

But he'd come today to do the right thing. Because since meeting Jenna, he'd done everything wrong. Everything.

The knowledge that he'd stolen her virginity still wrenched his gut. As did the knowledge that he'd upset her so terribly, she'd had to pack up and leave. She deserved so much better than what he'd been able to offer her over the weeks they had pretended to be husband and wife. And he intended to give
her
what
she
deserved now.

"Back in t
he spring," Gage began, "on the
day of the terrible storm that caused all the flooding, Jenna and I met on Reservation Road. She stood in the pouring rain, risking her own safety to stop me from driving into the floodwaters that had washed out the roadway. She saved my life. I owed her a Life Gift. So when she came to me looking for help in gaining custody of her niece, I felt I had to help her."

"You had no choice but to repay your debt," Hoo'ma supplied, nodding her head in emphatic defense.

Gage offered the woman a small smile of appreciation. The truth of the matter was he felt sick that he was revealing the secret pact he'd made with Jenna. He hated that he was breaking the promise he'd made to her, but he felt he had no other choice. His grandfather was bent on using the information against her. Half truths were more dangerous than straightforward fact.

Chee'pai's chin tilted in triumph. His gaze swung to Jenna. "So you lied to this Council
when you said that you and Gage
were in love."

Astonishment made Gage turn and stare at Jenna, but her eyes were riveted to the shaman. Having arrived just as his grandfather a
ccused Jenna of lying about their marriage and about
her plans to teach Lily

her native culture, Gage had heard her mention nothing of love. He couldn't believe Jenna would tell the Elders —

"You're putting words in my mouth," Jenna charged. "I mean no disrespect, but that's not what I said, Chee'pai. I cannot and would not ever attempt to speak for Gage. I can only speak for myself. And what I told you was the truth."

Gage's lips parted as his jaw went slack. Jenna hadn't mentioned the word love, but his grandfather had. However, Jenna just professed to telling the truth. His mind raced to put it together.

"But that doesn't excuse the fact," Chee'pai said, "that you intentionally manipulated this Council for your own gain."

"I did it for Lily!"

The desperation in Jenna's tone was like a kick to the seat of Gage's pants. He whirled on his heel and faced his grandfather. "Repaying a Life Gift was not the only reason I agreed to help Jenna," he declared.

A deep frown bit into Chee'pai's brow.

"The story Jenna explained," Gage continued, "shocked me. She is Lily's aunt. She is Lily's family. Yet she was not being considered as the child's guardian."

"Of cour
se she was being considered, G
age,"
H
oo'ma said.

"Honestly?" he asked the woman. "Then why was she given such a runaround? She met with you for weeks and weeks. Provided all the information you asked for. And the members of this Council kept putting more and more roadblocks in her way."

Hoo'ma's lips flattened, and she glanced toward Chee'pai.

The shaman squared his shoulders. "Gage, you know that we must do all we can to preserve our tribe. Lily is Lenape. We felt it was important that she stay here. Among her people."

Gage sighed. "I understand," he said, his tone soft now, "that your intentions are only for the good of the tribe. I attempted to explain that to Jenna. But it seems to me, Grandfather, that the goal has somehow become more important than the people.

"Your inflexibility in wanting to keep the tribe together has alienated people. My parents are two prime examples. Because they wish to live in Arizona — for my mother's health — you have made them feel ostracized. And you denigrate the young people who move from Broken Bow in order to find work, to travel the world, to educate themselves, to experience life. Just because our brothers and sisters, our mothers and fathers feel the
need
to
leave
the rez
for one
reason or another does not make them any less a part of our family. It does not make them any less Lenape."

Gage noticed that his grandfather's body tensed with disapproval, but that didn't thwart him from speaking his mind.

"Granted," Gage continued, "Jenna isn't Indian. But there was a time in Lenape history when the color of a person's skin meant nothing. People of all races and creeds were adopted into the tribe without thought to their outward appearance. French trappers took Lenape wives. Widowed English settlers took Lenape husbands. Orphaned children were taken in, provided for. They all became part of our family. What mattered was the nurturing of the soul. What mattered was that everyone felt wanted and needed and cared for.

"A woman who had maternal feelings for a motherless child would never have been kept from that child for any reason, least of all her ethnicity." Gage glanced at the Elders and understood that all of them knew he spoke the truth.

"Yes —" Chee'pai nodded "— what you say is true. But these are different times. You have to admit that."

Reaching out, G
age rested the fleshy part of h
is fist on the wooden table. H
e was very
aware of the stillness that had fallen over the room. "All I know is that segregation is an idea that comes from the outside world, not from the Lenape."

Almost simultaneously, the gazes of several of the Elders slid from his.

Gage swung his arm outward to indicate Jenna. "This woman loves that child. She gets up in the night. Makes herself available at all hours. She's put her niece first, taking care of her business only when Lily is napping or sleeping for the night. She worries and frets, cuddles and plays, praises and teaches just as if she were that baby's mother. She couldn't love Lily more had she given birth to her. Jenna uprooted herself at your request. She has made friends here. And not only that, she's gone beyond the call of duty to help the artists of our tribe with the Web site she's building to sell and promote their work. Jenna has an earnest interest in learning our culture so she can teach Lily about her Lenape roots. She deserves to raise that child."

He glanced at Jenna, but she'd dipped her head. He had no way of knowing what she might be thinking.

"I want to urge each and every one of you to —" He stopped suddenly, feeling as if the remainder of his sentence had been choked
off. "I want to urge you to —"

Again, his request caught, refusing to be uttered.

He swallowed around the knot that had suddenly formed in his throat. What was wrong with him? He'd come here to help her. And that was what he intended to do.

"Please," he said, forcing his tongue to work, "give Jenna your blessing to leave Broken Bow with Lily." His breath went suddenly and surprisingly ragged as he finished, "If that is what she chooses to do."

Jenna was dumbfounded by all that Gage had said. She was utterly amazed that he would even show up here at the meeting after the angry words they had tossed at each other just a couple of days ago. And she was staggered by the arguments he'd made on her behalf, especially since he'd told her from the start that if it was discovered that he had tried to deceive the Elders, he could be ousted from the tribe.

At the same time she felt heartbroken. If he hadn't been standing in the back of the hall to overhear her heartfelt profession to the Elders, then he most certainly deciphered her feelings by what she'd been forced to admit to Chee'pai with Gage standing
right there
beside her. Yet
knowing
that
he'd captured
her heart,
Gage
had still asked the Council to let her leave Broken Bow with Lily. That was a clear message of just how badly he wanted her gone.

Not that she'd expected anything else. He'd made his feelings obvious when they had argued at the stable. But still, hearing him urging fo
r her release churned up a star
tlingly strong sadness in her.

She stepped forward to address the Elders. "I should probably apologize to all of you for how I handled things." She paused long enough to take a deep breath. "But I'd be lying if I said I was sorry. About anything."

Although she couldn't bring herself to glance at the man standing next to her, she was keenly aware of the solid mass of him just inches away. But she kept her eyes trained forward. "Had I not met Gage the day of the terrible storm, I would not have had the means to convince the Council to grant me custody of my niece. Had he not opened his home to me here on Broken Bow, I would never have realized the awesome heritage that is an indelible part of who Lily is."

She directed her attention to the shaman who seemed to remain in deep contemplation. "Chee'pai, I understand your wanting to hold fast to Lenape traditions. And I want you to know that, no matter where Lily and I end up, I still want her to be a part of this loving family. I would not have been able to say that a month ago. So I can't stand here and apologize for what could be described as my less-than-honorable choices."

Despite sound reason, Jenna found herself turning to face Gage. "I don't regret anything."

If the soft tone of her voice didn't reveal to the Elders the intimate meaning behind her words, then the heat suffusing her face surely would.

With her heart hammering, she lifted her gaze back toward the Council. "I hope you won't take Lily from me. I love my niece, as Gage said, just as much as if I had given birth to her. I want her with me. I need her with me."

The Council was quiet, clearly pensive. Finally, Hoo'ma spoke. "I think a final vote is in order, but because this is such an important issue — a child's future — I'll ask if there is any further discussion that needs to take place first."

She paused to give the members a chance to speak their minds, and the silence seemed
to
last
an eon f
or
Jenna.

When
no one exe
rc
ised their right to
speak, Hoo'ma continued, "No one can predict the future. No one can say what might happen between Gage and Jenna and Lily. The Great One has a way of twisting and shaping tomorrow in ways that none of us ever expect. But whatever fate has in store, I personally believe that Lily Collins should be with Jenna. The child is firmly entrenched in Jenna's heart. Jenna has certainly proved her love for the child. Whether Jenna decides to stay here with us or leave the reservation, I believe mother and child should be together. All who agree please speak up now."

One by one, the Elders made their judgment known by nodding or raising their hands. Chee'pai's brow was puckered and he remained still for the longest time. Finally, he gave a silent nod.

Jenna closed her eyes and released a huge exhalation, her great relief and gratitude lifting her lips in a smile. The Council members rose and rounded the table to offer her congratulatory hugs and handshakes. Gage had stepped aside to let the others come near.

The feelings rolling through her were peculiar; an odd mixture of pleasure and pain. She'd finally achieved her goal of becoming Lily's formal
guardian. B
ut
she fell
like
a
completely different person now. Her weeks at Broken Bow — living as Gage's wife — had changed her.

After saying her goodbyes, she found herself searching the room for Gage once again. He was enmeshed in an intense conversation with Hoo'ma and another Council member.

Jenna owed him a great deal. Without his help, without his zealous plea, she knew the Council never would have granted her custody. She wanted desperately to thank him. But knowing how he felt about her, about how difficult their act of intimacy had been for him to deal with, she decided to make their final parting as easy on him as possible. Without another word, she simply slipped away.

"Gage, could we talk?"

His grandfather's question made Gage pause just as he was about to pull open the door of his pickup. He'd kept silent about his grandfather's stubborn attitude for far too long, and Gage didn't mind facing Chee'pai now that he'd had the chance to speak his mind. However, now wasn't a good time.

"It will have to be later, Grandfather," he said
.
“I
have
to
-
"

"Please. I have a couple of things I need to say."