Born of Shadows (47 page)

Caillen had given her this gift.

She turned to meet her mother’s glare with one of her own. “I’m no longer a member of your Guard, Mother. Remember? You dismissed me.”

“Let her go, Sarra,” Kara said. “She’s only half Qillaq anyway.”

Desideria lifted her chin as Kara’s words angered her more. “And proud of it.” She narrowed her gaze on her aunt. “My father wasn’t a traitor. He was a damn good man and I’ll cut the throat of anyone who says differently. You should also remember, Kara, that spared your life once and saved it another. I’m not a child anymore and I will not be treated as one by any of you ever again. You don’t run my life.
I
do.”

Her mother pulled on the gold chain that she always wore around her neck, a chain she kept tucked right over her heart. As it came free of her body, Desideria saw that a ring dangled from it. The deep purple stone carved with a coat of arms gleamed in the light. Her mother paused to look at it before she held it out to her.

Frowning, Desideria wasn’t sure she should take it. “What is that?”

Her mother grabbed her hand, placed the ring in her palm and closed her fingers over it. “That was your father’s insignia ring. He was a prince on his world and yet he chose to stay with me even though he knew he’d never be respected again. Even though he knew he’d never see his family.” To her complete shock, her mother’s eyes teared. “You’re right, Desideria, he didn’t betray our people, but he did betray me. He swore he’d come back and instead he was killed in a ridiculous accident when the fuel line in his ship ruptured.”

Desideria couldn’t breathe as she realized her mother had lied to her about his death. “He wasn’t fighting?”

She shook her head. “My son ran away from his training facility. He was all alone and I was terrified of what would happen to him. Your father went to bring him home to me. He swore he could find him and he was the only one I knew who could, so I let him go.”

“Why did you lie to me all this time?”

“You were too young to understand and I didn’t want you or anyone else asking me questions when the mere thought of his death was more than I could bear. You were the only one who loved him as much as I did and I didn’t want you to hate him for leaving us. I’d rather you hate me and cherish his memory. He deserves that much more than I do.”

She was appalled by her mother’s twisted logic. “You allowed everyone to call him a coward. How is that love?”

Her mother winced as if the question hit her like a blow. “I’m not perfect and I hated him for years afterward. I kept thinking if he’d been stronger he would have lived. I know it doesn’t make sense, but I thought if other people insulted him, it would keep me strong.”

That had to be the most screwed-up thing she’d ever heard. And to think, they allowed her mother to lead their planet…

Part of her felt sorry for her mother, but the other part wanted to slap her for what she’d done to her father, her brother and her.

“I don’t understand why you’re telling me this now.”

Her mother glanced at Kara before she spoke. “I was stupid when I was young. I put duty ahead of family. And what did I get for it? One daughter who tried to kill me. A son I’ll never see again. Two sisters who despise me, one so much she was planning on blowing my head off, and the only person who ever really loved me died because I lacked the temerity to stand up to a law I knew was stupid and keep my son where he belonged. At my side. Chayden should have never been in harm’s way and your father should have been allowed to be the king he was born to be.”

She reached out and cupped Desideria’s cheek in her hand. “I’ve done a lot of thinking since you left and I’ve worried about you every step of the way. I wanted to see how you would fare on your own and you more than surpassed my expectations. Never have I been prouder of you.”

Her mother sighed heavily. “All my mother ever gave me was the mantle of responsibility. What I want to give you is the freedom you need to not make my mistakes. You are your father’s daughter. Only he ever stood up to me. And now you.” She dropped her hand. “Go to your prince, daughter. Be with him.”

“She’ll be abdicating her place in our line if she does.”

Her mother curled her lip. “So what if she does? Being queen has never brought me anything except misery.” She turned back to Desideria. “You stood up for him when I tried to stop you a few minutes ago. Never stop doing that.” She stepped away to let her pass. “Consider yourself disinherited.”

Desideria felt the tears start to fall. For the first time in her life, she didn’t try to hide them. “I love you, Mother.” She took her hand and pulled her toward the door.

Her mother frowned. “What are you doing?”

“I have a surprise for you.”

Her mother dragged her feet. “I don’t know if I can take any more surprises today.”

Desideria smiled. “Trust me, you’re going to like this one.” She looked past her mother to Kara. “I trust you can take care of Leran and Karissa’s body?”

“Don’t insult me with such an insipid question.”

Desideria would have answered with an insult of her own, but it wasn’t worth it and she didn’t want to waste another moment when she could be with Caillen.

She took her mother out of the hangar and hailed a transport while she called Caillen’s family and let them know what was happening.

It didn’t take long to reach the hospital. But with the explosion her aunt had caused, it was total chaos. Fain and Hauk were in the bustling waiting room. At least they didn’t appear to be wounded.

The moment they saw her, they got up and allowed her and her mother to have their seats. She skimmed the bloody areas of their clothes, but none of it seemed to be theirs. “Were you hurt?”

Hauk shook his head. “No, we’re fine.”

“So how did you know about Caillen?” She hadn’t had a chance to call them.

They exchanged a confused frown. “What about Caillen?” Fain asked.

“He was seriously wounded. Aren’t you here for him?”

Hacursed. “No. We’re here for Darling. He was wounded protecting her.” He gestured angrily at her mother. “Because she couldn’t listen to anyone.”

Her mother glared at him. “How dare you take that tone with me.”

“Lady, if either of my friends die because of you I’m going to take a lot more to you than my tone. That you can bank on.”

Desideria stepped between them. “Let’s not kill each other right now.”

With a regal lift to her chin, her mother took a seat while she continued to give both Hauks a snarled lip that said she didn’t think much of them.

Before she could say anything else, Chayden came into their area with a drink carrier. Her heart pounded as she feared what reaction he might have.

You should have thought of that before now.

Yeah, she should have.

“They were out of dairy, so you guys’ll have to man-up and drink it…” His voice trailed off as he saw her. A slow smile curled his lips. “Hey, sis. Where’s Dagan?”

Her vocal cords froze as her mind debated what to do. How to tell him.

With no real idea and no better thought, she stepped aside so that he could see their mother. As she did so, Fain took the drink carrier from Chayden’s hands so that he wouldn’t spill the hot drinks on them or himself.

Silence rang out as her mother rose slowly to her feet.

The expression on Chayden’s face said he was torn between wanting to hug her and kill her. Her mother’s face was completely stoic. Desideria had no idea what she was thinking or how she would react.

Until her mother crossed the small distance and drew him into a tight hug.

Chayden stood there with his arms out, still not touching her. His confused gaze went to the Hauks and then to her.

Still their mother held him and rocked slowly back and forth. “You look so much like your father. For a minute, I thought I was seeing him again.”

That was the wrong thing to say. Chayden all but shoved her away from him. “Don’t even come at me with that shit.” He turned his angry glare at Desideria. “You had no right bringing her here without clearing it through me first.”

“I thought you’d be excited.”

“Like having my fingernails peeled back… which I had done a couple of times when I was on Qilla.”

The color drained from her mother’s face. “What?”

“Oh don’t give me that. You didn’t think I left because it was warm and toasty. Surely you’re not that stupid.” He took another step back. “I’m out of here. Hauk, call me later with a report on Darl.” He turned around and headed for the door.

Her mother ran after him.

Desideria started to follow, but Fain caught her by the arm.

“Let them settle this on their own.”

“Yeah, but—”

“No buts, Princess. Take it from someone who was disowned by his family, Chayden has to come to terms with this. It’s hard to let someone back in your life after they’ve kicked you in the teeth.”

Since she had no experience with what Chayden was going through, she deferred to Fain. But after her mother was gone for more than twenty minutes, she began to get worried again. “You don’t think he’s killed her, do you?”

Hauk tossed his cup into the wastebasket. “I was beginning to have that same thought. C’mon. Let’s go check on them.”

He led her across the room and back out the electronic doors. At first she didn’t see them. But as one of the transports moved, she saw them standing together by the side of the building. Her mother appeared to be doing all the talking while Chayden listened with an unreadable expression. The only clue to his mood was the tic in his jaw.

Her mother turned and looked at her, then said something more to Chayden.

He nodded before he walked away.

Crossing her arms over her chest, her mother headed back to them.

“Is everything all right?” Desideria asked when she rejoined them.

“All right would be a stretch. But he is willing to talk to me in a few days, so maybe it’s not all bad. How did you find him?”

She shrugged. “He’s a friend of Caillen’s.”

Her mother shook her head. “So I owe him for keeping my daughter alive, saving my throne and now for giving me a second chance with my son… What other miracles is he capable of?”

Hauk rumbled a deep laugh. “Trust me, Dagan’s no saint.”

That was most certainly true. “No, but he is a war hero. He saved two thrones…”

Fain came running up to them. “Dagan’s out of surgery and he’s asking for you.”

Desideria wasted no time heading back inside and finding a nurse to take her to Caillen’s room. Sterile and cold, the room wasn’t any bigger than her small bedroom. Caillen lay on the bed, hooked to more monitors than she’d ever seen before. A white blanket covered him.

“Don’t get him excited,” the nurse warned. “We need to keep his blood pressure down.”

She inclined her head to the nurse before she crossed the room.

Even though his face was covered with a clear mask, he smiled at her. “Hey, sunshine.”

Relieved that he was alive and alert, she took his hand into hers. “How are you feeling?”

“Like I got one leg shredded, sliced in the ass and then shot in the chest.” He frowned as he saw the ring on her hand. “You get married while I was out of it?”

“It’s my father’s. My mother gave it to me.”

“Really?”

She nodded. “I think she’s coming around to things.”

“Ah God, I’m dead, aren’t I?”

She let out an irritated breath. “Stop being so melodramatic, you big baby.”

“I’ll stop if you promise you won’t.”

“Won’t what?”

“Stop loving me.” The tone of his voice brought tears to her eyes. She heard the deep vulnerability and fear.

“Don’t worry, Cai. There’s no way I could live without you.”

He pulled his mask off and kissed her hand. “I’m going to hold you to that.”

“Is that the only thing you’re going to hold me to?”

He laughed evilly. “No. I still have boo-boos to be kissed.”

“Well in that case… I better start with your lips.”

Caillen’s head spun the moment she kissed him. In all the misadventures of his life, he’d never expected to find someone like her. Never expected to feel this alive while he lay one step from death. But as he tasted her, for the first time in his life he looked forward to the future.

He now had a goal. To keep her with him to the day Death separated them. No one would ever come between them again. “Marry me, Desideria.”

She nuzzled her cheek against him before she whispered in his ear. “Absolutely.”

EPILOGUE