Born of Legend (63 page)

Biting her lip, Ushara shook her head. “I don't want him put in harm's way, especially if it's harm he could bring upon himself with his disposition and mouth.”

Jullien gave her a droll stare. “Gee, thanks, love. Appreciate your support.”

She returned his stare tit for tat. “Oh, like you don't know. You're the first to admit it.”

Trajen laughed. “So what exactly is Nyran asking you to do, anyway?”

Jullien handed over his link. “He wants meetings and the things he's asking me for require that I go alone. I don't want anyone else with me that he could use for leverage. Plus, he claims to have eyes on me here. So I don't know who to trust.”

Trajen spent a few minutes reading through Nyran's messages before he handed the link to Ushara. “He's right. While I agree with you that Jullien needs to learn a bit more about teamwork, there's still a time and place for solo. This would be it. But what I'm suggesting will allow us to be with him from a distance. We can still run point. It's the only solution, really.”

He gave Ushara a moment to read through the threats Nyran had made against them before he spoke again. “And let me explain something.… This isn't easy for me, either. I'm trusting you both with a part of my past and with someone I swore I'd never open up to anyone else. I'm not taking this step lightly. I only trust Jullien because he knows the cost of betrayal. And you both know how I'll react to it.”

“And I've got no place else to go.”

Trajen snorted. “There is that.”

Ushara turned the link off. “I still don't like it.”

“I know.” Trajen sighed heavily. “But you know I wouldn't suggest this if I didn't feel it necessary. There is absolutely no one else I'd ever offer this to. And I do mean no one.”

Ushara choked on her tears as she considered every negative scenario that could go wrong. Not to mention the fact that her life was a case study in disasters that defied the odds and should have never occurred. “How long will it take?”

“About two hours. But the training will take a few months. He'll have to be away for it.”

And that stung even more.

Jullien took her hand. “I will be here for you when the babies are born. Come Tophet or Koriłon, nothing will keep me from your side.”

She laced her fingers with his and met Trajen's gaze with determination. “I want to be there when it's done to him.”

“Shara—”

She held her hand up at Jullien. “I won't give on this. If you're going to be stupid, I want to be there to support it and beat you should it go wrong.”

Jullien lifted her hand and kissed it. “There's the sane, rational female I fell in love with. Glad to hear her voice of reason.”

Trajen laughed again. “You two get some rest. I have to make contact with someone who's going to be less receptive to the idea than Ushara, and arm-wrestle him to the ground for it. So it'll be a couple of days before we have to leave.”

“What about Nyran?” Jullien asked. “I need to tell him something to keep him from getting suspicious.”

“I've got information you can give him to string him along. I'll send it over to your link.”

“Thanks.”

He inclined his head. “Oh—and, Shar? Ignore your sisters' earlier words of wisdom. Go with your gut. This one'll be fine for the nursery. The babies will love it.” He pushed one of the paint cards on the coffee table toward her, and with that, he literally vanished.

Tears filled her eyes as she looked down and saw which card Trajen had chosen.

“We're having daughters.” She held up the light pink paint swatch she'd desperately wanted, but her sisters had all thrown a fit about it being too early to choose colors yet. “I hope you didn't have your heart set on a son.”

Jullien shook his head. “I already have a great son, thanks to you. All I ask is that our beans are healthy. Nothing else matters to me.”

Ushara got up and tugged at Jullien's hand until he stood and allowed her to take him back to their bedroom. “You're not mad at me for calling Trajen, are you?”

He drew his brows together into a stern expression. “I would never be angry at you for loving me enough to try and protect me. I've waited a lifetime for someone to care.”

Those words broke her heart. And it made her realize something about his trip.… “Are you all right? It had to be hard to go home again.”

“That was never my home. It was only the place I was once forced to live.”

Wincing silently at those words, she knew the pain his dry tone concealed. She couldn't imagine feeling that way about her childhood home. While it wasn't large, and no longer held much of her personal items, it still made her warm inside to be there. Like walking into an all-body hug. The sights. The smells. Everything about it soothed her and brought back the happiest memories from her past.

But then, Jules never felt like a part of his own family. They had never given him those gifts of warmth and security. The gifts of love and acceptance.

And they'd never treated him like a member of their family. He'd been shut out his entire life. An unwanted stranger.

“Did any of them see you?”

He laughed bitterly. “Actually, I had a conversation with my aunt and her partner. They had no idea who I was.”

Her jaw dropped in shocked disbelief. “Seriously?”

“Yeah. Tylie would have arrested me immediately had she known. Kelsei would have shot me again.”

How could they not recognize him? He hadn't changed
that
much. But then, they'd never cared or even looked at him. The fact they could stand that close to him and not know him said it all.

Their indifference disgusted her. Try as hard as she could, she just couldn't imagine a family that didn't love or protect its own.

Especially an Andarion one, where blood, heritage, tradition, and lineage were everything.

When she started for the bed, Jullien caught her. With the gentlest of touches, he pulled her against him and pressed his cheek to hers. He didn't say a word. He merely held her against him in a tight embrace.

Ushara felt more tears gather in her eyes. This was how he coped now whenever he was deeply and emotionally hurt. Without words.

Because he'd never had anyone care for him, there had been a time when he hadn't reached out for her, but he'd finally gotten past that. Finally learned to trust her enough to seek comfort in her arms whenever something bothered him.

Closing her eyes, she savored the warmth of his body against hers. The scent of his skin. He was so incredibly strong and independent that it made her weepy to know she was the only comfort he craved whenever he was hurt. She, alone, was his security blanket that he needed to have by his side. She suspected it was why he never complained whenever she burrowed her icy feet against his warm skin. So long as her feet were there, he knew she was with him.

But the moment she no longer touched him, he awakened instantly. And wouldn't settle down again until she returned to bed.

Jullien nuzzled his face against her neck. “Thank you for my birthday,” he whispered against her ear. “And thank you for my life.”

Pulling back, she smiled up at him. “You don't have to thank me. I'm so grateful to have you. It's why I'm afraid that something's going to tear you away from me like it did Chaz.”

“I'm not going anywhere. I have nowhere else to go. Besides, I'm hard to kill.”

She narrowed her gaze at him. “You're not funny.” She pulled his shirt over his head and hesitated as she saw the scars on his body that bore out the truth of his words. Her Jules was a fighter.

Fierce. Determined. Lethal and skilled.

And though he was definitely hard to kill, he wasn't invincible. She knew that, and it terrified her. It was, after all, how they'd met. He'd been on the verge of death that day.

While she had no doubt he'd fight to the bitter end, it didn't change the fact that the unthinkable could happen. And Nyran's threats against him were harsh and horrid.

His grandmother's even more so.

She ground her teeth. “We will find Nyran and we will end him.”

“It's not just him we have to worry about. It's his Tavali brothers. You saw the e-mails. They will come after me if I kill him. I can't ask the Gorturnum to go to war with the Porturnum for me. And I doubt they would. I'm still not accepted by the majority here. I don't have my citizenship. And half your family still refuses to talk to you or even look at us.”

“It's not the good half.”

“Shara…”

Sighing, she hated the fact that he was right. Even her brother Dimitri was siding with Kirill. Because of Jules, he refused to come home so long as they harbored him. His wife was so mad at her right now, she was lucky Madina hadn't poisoned her food on temple days.

Jullien cupped her face in his hands and pressed his forehead against hers. “I'm so sorry that I brought disharmony to your family.”

Those words choked her, as did the anguish in his voice. On Andaria, the role of a male was to keep peace in his home, at all costs. To protect his family and guard them against all threats. It was impressed upon them from the moment of birth. For females, it was to protect the sanctity of their bloodlines and lineage, and to keep it sacred.

While Ixurian males were expected and encouraged to fight and rage against others, they were never to bring that fury home to their families.

Ypasunga bafthrex. Crossing the threshold.
That was the term they had for it. Once a male entered his home or that of any family member, he was to immediately check his emotions and restrain himself. Failure to do so was considered an act of flagrant dishonor against his lineage and was considered highly shameful. Such behavior was corrected swiftly and harshly by his family—male and female. It could even cause a male to be disinherited.

And for a male to allow others to disrupt the harmony of his home was an even greater shame to his honor and name. Failure to maintain peace within the family and home was the leading cause of suicide in their society among their males—second only to debilitating injuries that the males felt made them a burden to their families. Harsh customs and beliefs she'd never personally agreed with, but it was all Jullien knew. All he'd been shown.

Rigid rules in a harsh, unforgiving, martial society.

Pulling back again, she stared up at him so that he could see the sincerity in her eyes. “You have brought nothing but happiness to my home and heart. What they have chosen to bring here is on them. You are never to take responsibility for their hatefulness.”

She took his hand and led it to her stomach, where their unborn children slept in safety. “I never thought to find another male I could love at all, and what I found was one who showed me a whole new depth to that emotion that I didn't even know existed. One I cannot live without. I need you, Jules. I cannot imagine my life without you, and I don't want to ever go back to
that
existence.”

Jullien sucked his breath in sharply as those words made his heart speed up and she dropped her hand to cup him through his pants. He dipped his head to kiss her while she slowly opened his fly to stroke him. She had no idea what she did to him whenever she loved him like this. What the warmth of her hand on his body meant. The fact that she would face him, and explore his scarred body while they made love, and accept him …

Grinding his teeth, he toed his boots off while he kissed her, and she peeled his pants down his body. He lifted her gown over her head before he picked her up and set her on the bed.

He slowly took his time sampling her breasts, savoring each one until he was drunk from the scent of her skin and taste of her.

When he started to move lower, she tugged playfully at his cheek and wrinkled her nose. “Your whiskers are getting so thick.”

“What?”

She nodded with a serious scowl. “You're becoming quite woolly.”

After kissing her rounded stomach, he crawled up her body to flash his fangs at her. “I thought you liked me woolly.”

She brushed her hands through his chest hair. “I do, but there's a fine line between sexy and stalker.” She returned her hand to tug at his chin. “Two more days, you'll be scaring small children.”

Laughing, he nipped playfully at her fingers. “Fine. I'll shave in the morning. Unless you want me to stop now and take care of it.” He started to roll away, but she caught him between her legs to keep him right where he was.

“I can live with it for the night.” She rolled him to his back so that she straddled him.

Jullien's breath left him in a rush as he felt her wetness against his stomach. Even now, he couldn't believe that she allowed him so much freedom in her bed. That she accepted him as he was, and that his hideous body didn't bother her in the least. After a lifetime of females who saw him as deformed and revolting, he still had the urge to hide at times and rush to be done as quickly as possible so as not to bother her with his biological needs.

But Shara wouldn't let him do that. She forced him into the light so that he could see he wasn't the freakish monster they'd made him out to be. For whatever bizarre reason, she enjoyed his company.

And she loved him, even with his flaws and scars.

Her eyes hooded, she smiled down at him as she slid herself onto him.

He growled at how good she felt. She rode him so slowly that it was sheer, exquisite torture. Closing his eyes, he lifted his hips, driving himself as deep into her as he could.
“Kimu tu, mu kitríewan.”

She took his hand into hers and kissed his palm. “I love you, too.” Sadness darkened her eyes as she ran her fingers over his tattoo and the scars it covered. Scars she pressed to her lips while she made love to him.

Jullien trembled at the sight of her kissing his wrist. Her faithful heart humbled him to the core of his rotten soul. He'd felt so hopeless and alone the night he tried to kill himself. In that hour of absolute misery, where he'd been slammed down so hard that he thought he'd never rise up again, he'd been unable to conceive of a moment like this. Of having a female like Ushara to share his life with.