Bonded (The Raegan Mason Trilogy) (14 page)

My grumbling stomach forced me to rummage through the refrigerator.  I found milk and searched for some cereal to go with it.  I poured myself a bowl of cereal and sat down at the same table where we ate dinner.  I absentmindedly scooped spoonfuls into my mouth as I tried to remember what happened after the kiss.  My mind was coming up with zilch.  I checked my phone again, 7:15.  I carried my bowl and spoon to the sink and washed the dishes quickly.  I dried them and put them away.  I tried busying myself around the small room looking for things to pass the time.  I tried the front door but it was locked from the deadbolt.  Trapped like Rapunzel in the tower.  I don’t belong here, I thought, feeling trapped.

I ran back up the stairs to his room and made the bed as best I could.  I sat back down on the bed and looked out at the morning.  The waters were white capped with the wind.  There were some early morning surfers on the waves.  I wondered if Kyler was one of them.  I shook my head.  He wouldn’t lock me up to go enjoy some waves.  But the doubt was planted in the back of my mind. 

I climbed the next set of stairs to the watch room.  From this height, I could see most of the island and the ship channel.  I was amazed at the beauty of the morning and the rainbows reflected on the floor of the watch room.  I looked toward the beach and guided my eyes toward the Rock.  I could see it from here, not detailed, but enough to know I would have been visible from here a few nights ago.  Questions filled my head.  Was Kyler there that night?  He had to have been.  The music was the same.  Ok, so if he was there, what happened?  Why can I hear music when he’s around?  What did that have to do with my headaches? 

I walked around the parapet looking out.  There was a glass door leading out to the railed walkway outside.  I pulled the handle down and pushed the door open.  The wind was cool and moist with the sea breeze.  I stayed close to the glass wall behind me.  My fear of heights overwhelmed me and I paused to catch my breath.  I closed my eyes and breathed deeply washing away the sudden surge of vertigo.  I looked off in the direction we drove from last night and noticed Kyler’s motorcycle parked on the gravel driveway.  I stared confused trying to feel his presence but failed.  Did he walk somewhere?  I looked back toward the beach and willed my feet to move around the lighthouse gallery.  Was he surfing?  Annoyed with myself, I returned to the watch room and descended the stairwell.  I could always call him, I told myself, knowing I wouldn’t try just yet.  I returned to the bedroom and flopped down on the bed.  I lay my arm across my forehead to block the sun and tried to fall asleep again.  I lay there for a while with sleep avoiding me.  “This is useless.” I muttered as I sat up.  Maybe a shower would clear my head.  I gathered the melted icepacks and walked down the last flight of stairs into the living area.  After returning the ice packs to the freezer, I went into the bathroom and turned on the shower.

The hot water felt good.  It reminded me of his touch but not as pleasant.  I let the water run down my back loosening the tight muscles in my chest.  My rib still throbbed but not as bad.  The swelling in my face was down too.  I stood in the water until the hot water began to cool.  I turned off the water and stepped out into the fog that filled the room.  I grabbed a clean towel from the cabinet and wrapped it around my body.  My ruined clothes were in the trash can beside the toilet and I began to put on the borrowed clothes when I heard a knock at the bathroom door.  My heart stopped.  I didn’t hear Kyler’s music or feel his presence like I had before.  My heart started pounding.  What if Nate found me?  I quickly pulled on the clothes and turned the doorknob to peek around the door, grabbing the plunger for a weapon just in case.

Kyler was standing smiling at me with a bag of donuts in his hand.  “Are you hungry?” he smiled looking me from head to toe.  I swallowed hard remembering to breathe, dropping the plunger behind the door.

“Um, I ate some cereal just a while ago.”  Confusion covered my face.  We were a foot away from each other and I couldn’t hear anything as before.  His brow furrowed as he saw the confusion on my face.

“Are you okay?” He asked, placing the donuts on the counter and reaching to move my wet hair from my face.

“I, um, what happened?  I can’t feel…hear…” I struggled to find the words to describe what I felt before.  I felt disconnected.

He looked at me, his sapphire eyes searching mine.  “I took care of some things.” He simply stated.

 I looked at him and asked, “What did you do to me?” 

Shock covered his face.

“Nothing!” he said incredulously, and looked away from me.

“I don’t remember anything after we kissed last night, and now I can’t feel you!”  I stood there with my hair dripping wet on the borrowed shirt.

“I found a way to stop that for now.” He said looking down.  “Nothing happened after the kiss.  You fainted and I put you in bed and put some ice packs on your ribs.  I made sure you were safe and locked the door to go…take care of some things.
Did you sleep well?”  He wouldn’t look me in the eye.

“Why would you stop whatever that was between us?  I feel so empty now.”  I walked toward him and reached out to touch him.  The jolt of electricity was still there, but muted.  There was still pleasure, but not as intense.  “And, no I did not sleep well.  I had a really bad nightmare.”

He looked at my hand touching his arm and breathed a sigh.  “I’m sorry you didn’t sleep well.  I was hoping you would feel safe here.  Now it’s easier to tolerate.  I couldn’t bear to hurt you.”  He whispered, still not meeting my gaze.

“Hurt me?  You weren’t hurting me.”  He chuckled and I braced myself for the surge that didn’t come.

“You enjoy losing control?”  He looked at me from beneath his messy hair, a crooked smile on his face.  “You wouldn’t have been able to stop...and it took everything I had in me to stop last night.  Would you have regretted anything?”  He raised an eyebrow and stared through me.

“I,  um, no I don’t, I would have…” Mortification covered my face as I felt the full impact of his comments.  We were that close last night and I didn’t care at the time, but now with my brain in control and not my hormones or whatever the controlling factor may have been, I was certainly not ready to give up that part of me, yet.

He laughed again.  “See, I didn’t want to hurt you.”  He pulled me closer to him and I could still feel heat, but again it was less intense.  “Isn’t this, easier?

“Sort of, but what did you do exactly?”  I looked up into his hypnotic eyes, but the urge to throw myself hopelessly at him was not there.  I still wanted to be with him, but it was not the uncontrollable magnetism like last night.

He looked at me and wrinkled his nose.  “I’d rather not get into the details right now.  It’s a little complicated and well, I don’t think you’d understand.”

I pushed away from him and glared at him.  “Are you questioning my ability to understand?”

He smiled wickedly at me and pulled me close again.  “Not at all, I just don’t think you’d understand this.”  His gaze melted my anger and I yearned to kiss him again.  Not the same uncontrollable urge I had last night, but a true desire.  I rose up on my tip toes, hesitantly, to reach my arms around his neck expecting him to pull away.  He met me half way and gently kissed me.  Emotions rushed through me that I hadn’t felt last night.  Tenderness, protection, love.  The kiss wasn’t as passionate, but it still got my blood pumping.

He released me from the embrace and smiled at me.  “Control is better now.”  I wasn’t sure if he was telling me he was in control, or stating that I was.

“Can you tell me anything?” I asked, trying to use my power of persuasion on him. 

He laughed and trailed his finger tips over my cheek bone where the faintest bruise was developing.  His eyes flashed like blue flames before returning to normal as he grabbed my hand.  “I can tell you that you’re beautiful and brave.  I am honored to be in your presence.”  He made a bowing motion and kissed my hand.  “Your chariot awaits, my lady.”  He motioned to the door.  Frustrated beyond my limits, I stomped to the door.

I was tense the whole ride back into town.  I held on to him but didn’t feel the strong surges of electricity flow through us as before.  We stopped at the boardwalk near Julie’s house.  He said it would be best if we didn’t arrive at her house directly seeing me dressed in his clothes.  He pulled a bag from the saddle bag on the side of his motorcycle and tossed some clothes to me.  There was a pair of denim shorts and a top similar to the one I wore the night before.  I stared at him dumbfounded.  “I left you last night and went to find something close to what you were wearing.  You don’t need to be interrogated by Julie more than normal.”  He smiled, dimples flashing.

“Thanks, but she’ll be digging for details anyway.  What am I supposed to tell her?” Nothing would please me more than to blurt out the fact that we spent the evening together, but I wasn’t positive what that meant.  Did that mean we were actually together? I tried not to let the hope of that scenario come to the surface, but it was too hard not to hope.

“You can tell her whatever you feel comfortable telling her.” He raised his eyebrows mischievously.

“Ugh! Can’t you give a straight answer to anything?  I feel like I’m talking to the Riddler.  What is this between us?” I reformed my original question.  “I don’t know what to tell her because I still don’t know what this is.” I moved my hand back and forth between us.

His smile faded.  “Tell her we’re dating.  That’s the easiest explanation.”  He looked disappointed but I couldn’t feel his emotions anymore.

“Dating? Okay, we’re dating.” Hope fluttering inside me, but I tried to remain collected.  “When will you explain more to me?” I asked again.

“Soon, but right now you need to change and get to Julie’s.”  He looked out toward the ocean.  His eyes grew fierce and his jaw tightened.  I turned behind me to find what he was focused on, fearful it would be Nate again.  Nothing but water and sand stood behind me.  I turned back to him to find his expression softened and a smirk lining his face.  “There’s a changing tent over there.  I’ll wait while you change.”  He pointed to a yellow and green striped tent near the boardwalk people used to change into swimsuits.  No one was out this early except for the few surfers down on the beach.  I walked away reluctantly and looked back to the water expecting to find the source of his tension.  The waves rolled and crashed on the shore in a rhythmic pattern.

I returned a few minutes later dressed in clothes that were near perfect replicas of the ruined ones back at the lighthouse.  It was almost 8 a.m. and I pulled the cell phone from my pocket to call Julie.  I was dialing and walking back to Kyler at his motorcycle when Julie picked up on the first ring. 

“Where are you?” She shouted through the phone.

“Relax, I’m near your house.  Can I come in when I get there?”

“Yeah, sure.  So you’re okay? You didn’t return my calls.  Where did you stay? What happened?” She rattled off the beginning of her interrogation.

“I’ll talk to you when I get there.” I ended the call and stood a short distance away from Kyler.  “I don’t know how much I can keep from her.” I sighed and looked up in his eyes.  “Honestly, I don’t know what I can tell her seeing as I don’t know much myself.”

“You can tell her whatever you want.  I’m sure you’ll figure something out.” He smiled again and reached his hand out to me.  I wanted to stay with him all day but my head was in control now.  I reached for his hand and he pulled me close again.  “Whatever you tell her about us, I’m more than happy to go along.” He ran his nose along my neck and kissed me gently below my ear.  My legs felt unsteady and my body flushed with heat.  “Control is much better.” He whispered.

“Who are you talking about?” I gasped.

He laughed and looked at me.  “No good?” He questioned.  His blue eyes sparkled in the morning light.

“Very good, but I’m definitely not in control.”  I forced my lips to his and enjoyed the pleasure of running my hands through his hair.  His right arm wrapped tightly around my waist pulling me closer.  The blood was beginning to boil again when he relaxed his hold on me and pulled away.

“We’ll need to work on that then.” He dropped his arm from my waist and climbed on his motorcycle.  The bike roared to life as he turned and winked at me before driving away.

I stood there trying to collect my thoughts and composure before walking down the boardwalk to Julie’s house.

Julie was waiting at the front door when I walked up the sidewalk.  She was in obvious distress looking up and down the street for me.  When I came into view, she threw open the door and ran out to me.  She hugged me then punched me in my shoulder.

“Ow! Is that necessary?” I asked her, rubbing my shoulder.

“You’re an idiot!  Where have you been?  I’ve been sick worrying about you.  Everyone heard what happened with Nate and when we went looking for you, all we found was him laid out on the sand with a busted mouth.  He said someone jumped him from behind while you two were trying to get ‘busy’.” She air quoted and stuck her finger in her mouth trying to gag herself.  “We all knew he was lying.  Are you okay?  Oh my God, your face!  Where else did he hurt you?  Who hit him? YOU???”  She fired off her questions a hundred miles an hour.

I tried walking toward the door but she stopped me and turned me to face her.  “Rae, answer me!”  The panic was real in her eyes but it seemed like such a long time ago and I didn’t want to relive it.

“Look Jewels, I am okay, now.  I’ll tell you what I can, but honestly everything happened so fast, I’m still trying to figure it out.”  I looked her in the eye and smiled warmly at her.  I didn’t need her freaked out and blabbing stuff to my Aunt Sarah.  Nothing actually did happen, except I’d gone over the deep end after some mysterious guy that made my body feel and do things it never had.

Julie let my arms go and stood up straight and then looked me up and down to make sure I wasn’t lying.  “What happened, Rae?  You’re battered, but you’re glowing!  You’re not some kind of masochist, are you?”