Bonded (57 page)

“No. It’s not
quite that easy. It’s a partial bond. Some things are clearer than
others and if you’re purposely trying to deceive me—”

“But I’m not.” He
sighed and ran his hands through his hair wondering why she
couldn’t just believe him. Fancy words didn’t come easily to him
but if that’s what it would take, well, he’d give it a try. He
picked up her hands, gently rubbing his thumbs over their backs.
“Brandi, listen to me. I love you. Yes, at first it was more
curiosity—your hair and name caught my attention—and then
lust—you’ve got an amazing body—but I’ve come to know you better
over the years. You’re smart, a quick thinker, you’re good at your
job—”

She shook her head
and tried to pull her hands away but he held on tight.

Ignoring her
protest, he continued on. “You care about people and are willing to
go out of your way to help them.” Now he looked directly into her
eyes and brought her hands up to his mouth, gently kissing her
knuckles. “You’re beautiful and sexy and even before the accidental
blood bond something about you attracted me, attracted my wolf.
That’s how the bond started. I still remember having you pinned to
the floor and feeling a pull towards you.”

“But in Kolding’s
Pass—”

“I was an ass. Ask
anyone, they all told me often enough.” He gave a rueful chuckle.
“I was fighting my feelings for you, not believing that they’d
last. Rogues aren’t known for being faithful you know and I didn’t
want to hurt you, so I started to come up with all these reasons
why it was better to let you go.”

“And now?”

“The captain
showed me the same papers he showed you all those years ago. The
ones that reassured you that you weren’t blood bonded to a
dangerous rogue. Turns out it’s not too likely that I’ll go off the
deep end some day.”

“Is that what you
really thought?” She tilted her head. “Is your wolf really so
unruly that it would take over?”

Reno released her
hands and rubbed his neck, his gaze restlessly scanning the room.
“It’s hard to explain until it happens to you. There’s a stigma to
the term rogue, you know. A sense of shame, of failure.”

He flicked her a
glance, trying to judge her reaction but her expression gave
nothing away. Nervousness assaulted him and he began to pace the
room, determined to express his feelings, even if it killed him. If
they were to have a future together, she had to know. “When you’re
a rogue, your pack doesn’t want you or they look at you like you’re
a ticking time bomb. The sense of camaraderie and family that
you’ve grown up with suddenly disappears once that label is put on
you. Maybe that’s why working with the halves always appealed to
me. I know how they feel when their pack turns on them and treats
them like they’re less worthy than the rest.”

Somewhat to his
surprise he found himself by the window again. Was it something
Freudian, like he was looking for an escape? Perhaps, but he’d gone
too far to leave off now. “And even though being an Enforcer might
elevate you from being considered a common rogue, there’s always a
shadow hanging over you, the fear that one day you’ll lose control
and everything you’ve worked for will slip away. That you’ll lose
the tiny bit of respectability you’ve managed to garner and once
again be alone, an outcast, a wolf without a home.” He swallowed
hard. Telling her this was like opening up a wound.

“It doesn’t always
happen.” She countered, taking a step closer to him. Her voice was
calm and even. He wasn’t sure what she was thinking.

“No. Some rogues
never turn but you can be damned sure they work hard at preventing
it. Constantly battling the wolf inside.”

“Your wolf isn’t
like that. The report says so.”

“Perhaps not, but
what if the report is wrong? And my wolf is definitely strong
willed, stronger than most. I’ve kept it on a short leash for
years.”

“A strong wolf for
a strong man makes sense, don’t you think?” She was right behind
him now; her hand was on his shoulder. He could feel the heat from
her body seeping into his. It was comforting—soothing—to have that
physical connection. “And maybe it struggles so much because you do
keep the leash so tight. If you relaxed a bit, it might as
well.”

“Could be. I’ve
wondered that sometimes.” He was quiet for a moment, staring at the
people on the street going about their daily lives. Then, gathering
his courage, he turned to face her. “So, that’s how it is to be a
rogue. It’s not a pretty life and not something I’d ever want to
subject anyone to.” He shrugged and gave a half smile. “But then
again, maybe it’s not my life. Maybe all these years I’ve been
denying what my heart has been telling me for no reason. Perhaps I
should
take a chance and... Or I should ask you to take a
chance...” He paused and frowned, suddenly unsure of whom he was
trying to convince, himself or her. “Ah hell, Brandi, will you have
me as your mate no matter what my future might hold?”

Brandi stared at
him wide-eyed and he wondered if he’d totally screwed up. His heart
started to race, and a strange buzzing filled his ears. Dammit,
couldn’t he do anything right?

Quickly he grabbed
her hand and pressed it to his heart, speaking with as much
sincerity as possible. “Brandi. I really do love you.”

She blinked and
then the corners of her mouth began to curve upwards. Tears
glistened in her eyes and half laughing, half crying, she leaned
forward until her head rested next to their joined hands on his
chest. “Reno, I’ve waited so long to hear that. Of course I want
you as my mate.”

An inexplicable
feeling of lightness and joy burst to life inside him. Reno folded
her in his arms and gently rocked her back and forth while
murmuring against her hair. “I know. I’m sorry it took me so long
to figure it out; to quit hiding from you because I was
afraid.”

Brandi looked up
and cupped his face with both her hands. “You weren’t afraid. You
were just too cautious, too dedicated. You didn’t want to endanger
anyone in case you really were a rogue. It shows depth of character
and I love that about you.” She brushed her lips over his, and then
shook her head. “Though how you could ever believe that about
yourself, I don’t know. A true rogue would never be able to lead an
entire squad or keep the men in line like you do. And a rogue would
never buy bubble wands and purple plastic shovels for little
refugees.”

“Where did you
hear about that?” He stiffened and felt his cheeks grow warm.

“I have my
sources.” She smiled smugly. “On the outside you’re a big mean
Enforcer but inside you’re just an overgrown lap dog.”

He rolled his
eyes. “That’s what Beth says about Damien.”

“Well, she’s
right. You both have these brooding, gruff exteriors, but those of
us who love you know it’s just a facade you put on for your
jobs.”

Reno leaned
forward pressing his forehead to hers. “Just don’t let that get
out, okay?”

“Promise.” She
pressed a quick kiss to his mouth.

“So...about this
blood bond thing.” He looked at her speculatively. “It’s one-sided
right now, correct?”

“You know
that.”

“Well, that’s
really not very fair and I think in the interests of ensuring we
have an equitable relationship, we need to remedy the situation as
quickly as possible.”

Brandi furrowed
her brow. “Where did that flowery speech come from? You don’t talk
that way.”

“I do when I’m
using my negotiating skills against a Purist Alpha.”

She snorted. “As
if. You go in snarling and growling and then wonder why I get pissy
about the mess you leave behind. Besides, I’m not a Purist Alpha,
so don’t go sounding all high and mighty on me.”

“Well... If you
insist.” Swiftly he grabbed her by the waist and hoisted her up
over his shoulder.

“Reno!” She yelled
and pounded him on the back. “What are you doing?”

“Acting like
myself.” He turned this way, then that before heading off down the
short hallway opening doors as he went along until he found her
bedroom. “I’m really not that civilized and when I see something I
want...” Carefully, he dropped her onto the bed. “I grab it.”

Suddenly, Brandi
found herself bouncing gently on her very soft mattress, and by the
time she stilled Reno had removed his shirt and was kicking off his
shoes.

She propped
herself up on her elbows. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Getting ready to
blood bond with you.” He gave her a devilish grin while loosening
his belt and then sliding off his pants and shorts in one fluid
movement.

Brandi glanced
behind him. She had a clear view down the hallway to the apartment
door. The same door he’d broken down and which was still wide open.
Mrs. O’Neill lived right across the hall and was eighty if she was
a day. The present view might give the poor dear a heart-attack.
“Reno! Put some clothes on. Anyone walking by can see you!”

He followed the
direction of her gaze, gave an annoyed growl and slammed the
bedroom door shut. “Better?”

“Um...” Her mouth
had gone dry and every thought drained from her head. He was facing
her now, gloriously naked and fully erect. Heat pooled between her
legs and a throbbing ache started within her.

“I’ll take that as
a yes.” He moved towards her as if stalking his prey. The look in
his eyes—dominant, controlled—held her pinned to the bed. When he
stood beside her, he seemed to loom like a giant making her feel
small and vulnerable. The idea had her heart racing.

Silently, with
measured moves, he knelt on the bed. His grip was firm and assured
as he positioned her until he was between her knees. Slowly he slid
his hands up her legs, to her thighs and then higher still. His
fingers skimmed inside the legs of her shorts, then traced the
lower curve of her buttocks.

“No panties?” He
quirked a brow. “Naughty girl.”

She shook her
head. “I was too hot.”

“You still are.”
He brushed his fingers lightly over the small thatch of curls that
covered her sex and a jolt of desire had her gasping. “Hmm...
You’re going to be a responsive mate, I see.” For a moment he
continued to tease her with feather-light touches that
super-sensitized her flesh. She bit her lip and tried not to move,
but her hips instinctively pushed upward wanting more.

Reno gave a low
chuckle and pulled her shorts off completely. Despite the heat of
the room, she shivered under his intense gaze and tried to move her
legs together, but he was in the way again and clamped his hands
down on her thighs. “Stay still. I like looking at you.” His voice
was gruff and commanding.

Instinctively,
Brandi obeyed and she felt her face heat. They’d been together
before but it had always been rushed, spur of the moment. He’d
never just...stared at her before. It was embarrassing
and...erotic...to be lying on the bed clad only in a tank top.

She shifted and he
slid his gaze up, the corners of his mouth curling in a teasing
smile. “Hmm...is there anything else important that you left off
wearing today?”

Ever so slowly he
traced a path over her hips and across her belly. Inch by inch he
pushed up her top. Past her stomach, over her ribs. She watched the
progress of his hands, saw her nipples bead in anticipation through
the thin material that covered them and then, just before he bared
her breasts, he stopped.

Instead of
uncovering her, he knelt over her and suckled her though the thin
material. As the fabric dampened under his mouth, it gently abraded
the sensitive peak. Each tug of his mouth, each scrape of fabric
sent her arousal soaring higher.

Brandi dug her
fingers into his hair, raking his scalp, holding his head in place.
Reno growled his approval and moved to give her other breast equal
attention. He stretched out on top of her; his weight pinning her
to the bed and sending a thrill chasing up and down her spine. She
loved the feel of him pressed close to her and began to caress his
body, tracing the indent of his spine, running her foot up his
calf, clutching the tight cheeks of his butt.

His hips shifted.
She could feel him, hot and hard pressing against her and she tried
to work her hand around so she could touch him. He obliged by
sitting back on his haunches but not before pulling her top over
her head.

He was like some
perfect statue before her—not polished and neat like an Adonis—but
rugged and strong and totally male. She had to touch him, to
explore, to prove to herself that he was really here in her bed and
not a dream lover that would disappear with the ringing of the
alarm clock.

Rising to her
knees she traced his shoulders and collar bone, first with her
fingertips and then her lips. Up his neck, to his stubbled chin
then down to his chest. She tongued his flat brown nipples,
laughing lightly when they bunched in response. Moving to his abs,
she licked each ribbed muscle delighting in the rippling shivers
her ministrations caused.

Placing her hands
on his thighs, she felt their strength, massaged the muscles and
then slid her hands to his hips. His shaft bobbed in front of her,
begging for attention and she gave it. He was hot and smooth, thick
veins running his length, his balls heavy in her hand. She played
him until he groaned and thrust forward.

“Enough.” He
pushed her onto her back, swiftly taking control. His fingers slid
through her silky folds. She gasped and shuddered as he touched her
most sensitive spot.

Squirming under
his attentions, need grew within her at an alarming rate. Her heart
was pounding so loudly, she could hardly hear. Quick, panting
breaths escaped her lips.

“You’re ready.”
His statement was blunt as if he knew her better than she knew
herself. Desire had turned his eyes black and his gaze seemed to
burn into hers.