Bobby Does Dallas: Hill Country Heart (24 page)

"I need to apologize to you about something.  Please.  This is important to me."  Carl's voice wasn’t whining, but it was close.

"All right."
Cecile gave in.  She had to admit, her curiosity was aroused.  In all of the years they had been together, Carl had never apologized to her about anything.  "Come on over, I can spare you a few minutes."

She took the intervening time to pull herself together.  It had been hard.  Bobby hadn't given up, and to tell you the truth – her resolve to keep him at a distance had begun to weaken. 
Annalise
had really given her something to think about – she said that Bobby wrote her a letter every day, sealed it in an envelope and give it to
Annalise
to either keep for her or forward to her address.  All Bobby had asked was that ‘
Lise
do her best to get Cecile to read his letters.  That news had really made her think.  She had done the only thing her heart would allow; she had asked
Annalise
to send the letters to her.

The last conversation she had with
Lise
still rang in her ears, "He's changed, Cecile.  Bobby Stewart is no longer a playboy.  He hasn't had a date with a woman since you left."

Cecile had tried to explain it.  "That's probably because of that pregnancy scare with that rodeo queen." 
Jealous much?

"I'm sure that had something to do with it,"
Annalise
admitted.  "Mostly it’s because of you.  And I have a box of love letters all written to you to prove it."

"Letters?"
  Every girl loves a love lettn habsp; 

“He writes one every day.” 
Annalise's
voice grew serious.  "You need to talk to him, Cecile.  Bobby really loves you."

"What about the baby?" She couldn't forget what he had said in the magazine article.

"He would be on top of the world about that baby, and you know it."  Her best friend was very convincing.  But Cecile had lived in a vacuum of self-doubt for so long that she had a hard time believing that someone could love her that much.  Carl had done a job on her – and she might never fully recover.

"Send me the letters.  I'll email you my address." 
Annalise
had refused to find out where Cecile had moved to, she was afraid that she would give in to Bobby's pleas. 

"All right!"
  Triumph was obvious in
Annalise's
tone.  "Bobby and you are meant to be.  You'll see."

Cecile didn't know about that, but the opportunity to read his thoughts was too big of a temptation to pass up.

"Come in."  She let Carl in.  He had lost weight. 
Funny how time can change your perspective of a person.
  Where once there had been resentment and anger – now there was something akin to remorse – remorse for time wasted and remorse for so many unkind things that had been said.

Carl moved into the room about six feet and stopped.  He looked around at the home she had created for herself.  It looked completely different from the living space that they had shared.  Gone was the modern art and the sleek leather furniture; instead, there were warm colors, soft fabrics and a collection of original artwork by Texas artists.  Anyone who knew her association with Bobby Stewart would know she collected the western prints and sculpture to draw his memory closer to her.  "Nice place."

"Thank you.  Would you like to sit down?"  She couldn't imagine what they had to talk about.

He went into her living room and set on the edge of the blue sectional sofa.  "I want you back, Cecile."

If he told her that he was giving her a million dollars, it wouldn't have shocked her more.  "What?  Why?" Cecile stammered and stuttered.  "You didn't want me when you had me.  Why would you want me back?"  Not that she was tempted, at all.

"I lied to you, Cecile."  Carl's face was haggard as if he d just been rescued from a castaway's prison. 

"What about?"
This couldn't be good.

"I lied to you about your appeal, your sexiness,
your
desirability – all of it."  He looked at her with such
wistfullness
that Cecile backed away, afraid that he was going to try and embrace her.

She was stunned.  Surely, she hadn't heard him right.  "You lied to me?  Why? 
For what purpose?"
  Her whole reality was becoming hazy.  What could he mean?"

"You were never frigid.  It was
all my
fault."  He didn't reach for her; instead he slumped over and put his head in his hands.  "The problems were mine, not yours.  I was too proud to tell you that I couldn't get it up for anybody.  I've always been attracted to you.  I still am."

This was pitiful.  She was actually feeling sorry for the jerk.  "What do you mean?  What kind of problem did you have that was so bad you couldn't be honest with me?"

"I have a prostate condition.  It's genetic.  The medication that I have to take renders me impotent. I was embarrassed."  His confession didn't do a thing to make Cecile feel better.

"So you're telling me that to save yourself from embarrassment, you led me to believe that I was a failure as a woman – a dud in bed – so undesirable that my own husband couldn't bring himself to fuck me?"  She was livid.    

"I've changed medications.  I can get hard now.  And I want you back.  I love you, Cecile."

He looked so sincere.  Cecile was speechless.  She stood up and walked across the room.  At one time these words would have been music to her ears.  Not anymore.  Besides, everything had changed.  And she might as well tell him – it wouldn't be a secret much longer.

"I'm not going to take you back, Carl. I've moved on.  I'm pregnant with another man's child."

His face grew red, and for a moment Cecile was afraid that he might become violent.  She moved to the other side of the bar – putting as much distance between them as she could. 

"You're pregnant?"  He said the words slowly, as if he were frozen with disdain.  "That was fast.  Have you been having an affair on me all this time?  I should have known. 
Any floozy who would go down on her knees and take a man's cock in her mouth uninvited, is just showing her true colors."

"Get out." She didn't mince words.  "The father of my child has nothing to do with you.  But, for your information: I was faithful to you until the day that I filed for divorce.  If you had been honest with me, we might
could
have worked this out.  I loved you at one time, and I did everything I could to make you love me."  There was a lot more she could say, but she was tired.  "But all of that is over; I have a new life to build for me and my baby – and
you
will not be a part of it."

After he was gone, Cecile locked the door and put that part of her life behind her.  At least now she knew the truth – Bobby had been partially right.  Carl was the one at fault, but she was the one that was a fool.  

*****

"Hold him steady." The bullfighter gave Bobby a little help before the chute opened.  "This is a wicked animal.  Chicken-on-a-Chain is no easy ride.  I'll be down there waiting on you."

Bobby tightened the rope around his hand.  It was a new one, and he wasn't used to it.  Hopefully, he wasn't making a mistake in using it today.  This was it – if he won today, the bull riding championship was his.  In the intervening months, since
Ceelee
left him, he had thrown himself into
rodeoing
and football.  And he had excelled in both.  The energy that he had been used to expending on chasing women now went into his sports and his studies.  He had graduated cum laude from The University of Texas with a degree in architectural engineering.  He had been drafted by the Dallas Cowboys and was to report to training camp in two days – in Dallas – where Cecile was – somewhere. 

The bull lurched under him.  Focus, Bobby.  He wanted to live to fulfill his dreams – he had so many of them.  And the dearest one was to get
Ceelee
back.  He could have called Roscoe, but this time he wanted to do it himself.  She hadn't been happy about being tailed and he didn't really blame her.  But God had to give him a break somewhere – after all, he had been being very good. 
For him.

The crowd was screaming and the stadium was full of TV cameras.  He wondered if
Ceelee
was watching.  News reporters had been hounding him for days.  His life was becoming more complicated by the minute.  The air horn sounded and Chicken-on-a-Chain exploded from the chute.  Bobby threw his hand up in the air and vowed to stick like glue to this whirlwind of hide and horn.  Eight seconds might sound like a short time, but when you're in a churning mixer of heart-stopping danger….eight seconds was an eternity.  He let his body relax – he didn't fight the bull, he allowed his spirit to rise above the noise and flashes of light from the photographers and view this as what it was – his chance. 

This was his chance to prove to himself that he could do anything – be anything – obtain his dream.  And when the horn sounded again, and the crowd went wild – Bobby knew hat anything was possible.  He could have anything he wanted – and what he wanted was
Ceelee
.

"Chicken-on-a-chain?
  Is that like soap-on-a-rope?" Alex wasn't even trying to be serious. 

He knew his brother knew exactly what he was talking about, but he played along.  "No, it’s a bull. It's the bull that I rode to win
Bullrider
of the year."  Bobby explained himself like he was talking to a third grader.  Alex and Scarlet were building a house just about a quarter mile from the B&B and Scarlet's kidney function had improved to the point where she had been able to reduce her meds.  Her body had accepted Alex's kidney just fine.  Alex was in a good mood, to say the least.  "You did
good
, Bobby.  We're all proud of you.     

Alex's praise pleased Bobby no end.  "I was lucky, brother.  I was using a new rope.  And that was risky.  It's a
Brazillian
– has a different feel than what I'm used to.”

"Waxed, I presume?"  It took a moment for Bobby to get it. 
Waxed.
 

"Funny."  At one time he would have cracked some sex humor right back at Alex.  But that didn't come as second nature to him anymore.  Sex had gone from a sport to the Stewart brothers, to something sacred and precious. 
Annalise
and Scarlet satisfied their men in every way and Bobby had no desire to seek meaningless sex.  He had lost his appetite for it.

"When are you leaving?" Alex grew serious.

"In the morning.
  I have a meeting with my agent at ten."

"An agent?
  Aren't you big
stuff.
" Alex joshed with his brother.

"All the players have them.  And I'll tell you after this rodeo win, I'm dreading the hype.  I've been invited to four store openings, five TV interviews, fourteen parties and I've got three marriage proposals.  And I haven't even got there, yet."

"You're going to do fine.  We'll let you get settled and then we'll all come up and see you."  Alex pulled Bobby into his arms for a bear hug.  "I'm
gonna
miss you, buddy."

For a moment, Bobby was taken back in time.  He still had memories of the first days that he had spent in the Stewart family.  For months he had expected to be sent back, rejd once more; left to go hungry and be afraid of the dark.  That fear of abandonment was so deeply engrained in
him,
it had made
Ceelee's
walking away from him even harder to bear.  "Do you think I have a chance with her, Alex?"  He didn't clarify who; he didn’t have to.

Alex let out a long breath.  "If you love her like I love Scarlet – you've got to try.  I have a sneaky feeling that it's all going to work out.  I saw
Annalise
heading to the post office with a big envelope addressed to Cecile – and it wasn't a manuscript."

"How do you know?"  Bobby wondered if it could be his letters.

"I asked." Alex winked at him and Bobby felt hope rise in his heart.

~ Chapter Nine ~

BOBBY DOES DALLAS. That was the headline that met Cecile's eyes when she opened the newspaper as she stirred her de-
caf
coffee.  Soon she could go back to drinking her sweet
elixer
of
caffinated
brew.  Breast-feeding was exhausting but when she held
Jaidon
close to her heart, it was worth all the sacrifice.  It had been hard going through the final stages of pregnancy and delivery by herself.  But she had made it.