Blue Moon: Blood Moon Trilogy #3 (18 page)

Or the lack there of…

Hallucination or not, though, I couldn’t keep the shiver that shot through me hidden as her eyes burned through my soul. For the first time since I met her, she unnerved me.

Cordelia clenched her eyes and shook her head before looking up at me again, this time confused. Her eyes had returned to their hazel hue, her expression softer. “Brooke?”

I forced a smile, alarmed by what I’d just witnessed. “Hey, honey,” I acknowledged, trying to keep my own bewilderment under wraps. “How are you doing? Colby says you’re having trouble sleeping, so I came to check on you.” I reached out and ran a hand over her dark hair. “You good?”

Flying forward, Cordelia wrapped her arms around my waist. “I’m great, and it’s all because of you. You brought me home.”

I folded my arms around her, my body having trouble softening into the embrace when it sensed something was off. “That’s good to hear,” I whispered. “Well, I wanted to come and check on you because I was up, and I heard your voice. Nick’s probably wondering where I am, so I should get back to bed, but I’ll see you at breakfast, okay?”

Cordelia nodded excitedly. “Okay. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” With a wave, I turned and walked back down the hall toward my room, feeling her eyes on me the entire time.

I thought Colby had been exaggerating—some kind of sibling rivalry or jealousy having emerged between them—but she was bang on; something was definitely off about all of this. Whatever Cordelia was experiencing went beyond PTSD. She’d just displayed behaviors that I hadn’t ever seen before in her. She was angry, almost murderous, when she stared me down. Clearly what she’d been through had affected her on a much deeper level than I’d ever thought. Her father definitely needed to know as soon as possible.

“It was unnerving,” I said as Nick brushed his teeth. I put my own toothbrush back in the holder and leaned against the counter as Nick flossed.

Nick didn’t seem as wigged out by my encounter with Cordelia last night; I think he was more concerned about why I was wide awake at that hour without telling him I was having trouble sleeping.

Nick tossed the string of floss and looked at me. “Stress and anxiety can manifest in so many ways, honey.” His eyebrows knit together sympathetically. “Remember your night terrors shortly after David died?” A violent tremor rolled through my body, and Nick raised a hand to my jaw, locking eyes with me. “You weren’t coherent. You had no idea what you were doing or where you were. Perhaps Cordy is going through the same thing.”

I thought back to that first hotel we stayed at when we made the trip from Arizona. It wasn’t one of my finest moments; I was so worked up from the nightmares and the recent memory of David’s death that I’d almost lost control and shifted in the room. I could have hurt someone.

“You’re right,” I agreed. “That’s probably all it was. I must have been reading too much into it because of how worried Colby was. She must have projected her feelings onto me, and in my overtired state of mind, I let it overwhelm me.”

Leaning forward, Nick kissed me lightly. “Talk to Marcus about your concerns. I’m sure he’ll be able to help Cordelia through her adjustment period.”

“Yeah. I planned on it. He wanted to get together later today to see if I’d come to a decision about his proposal.”

Nick straightened up, suddenly serious. “And? What have you decided?”

With a sigh, I turned and walked back to the bedroom with Nick one step behind me. “It’s a lot to take on, and I’m not sure if I’ll be able to do it on my own,” I confessed. “Both you and Marcus seem to think I’m perfect for the position, but I’m still so green. I could get us all killed.” Nick looked ready to object, but I held up a hand. “I want to give Marcus peace of mind so he can focus on this mission without the distraction of wondering about the future of his pack, so I’m going to accept. I’ll start learning everything I can about what being an Alpha means, but I need you to help me. I need you to be more than just my protector. You know more about this life than I do, and until I’ve gotten the hang of it, I need you to be honest with me if something feels wrong. I want you to back me up and lead by my side. I’m proposing a partnership, and I’m hoping to have Marcus sign off on that.”

Nick’s smile returned, and he nodded. “I’m sure we’ll have years—maybe even decades—before you’ll be Alpha, but I’m sure it’ll keep Marcus focused throughout all this. Regardless of when you become Pack Alpha, I will be here for you in whatever way you need me to be.”

Instead of shaking on it, I stepped up onto my toes and pressed my lips to Nick’s. “Thank you.”

“No need to thank me,” he told me, running his hands up and down my arms. “I’d do anything for you. Now, come on. Let’s get dressed and head downstairs.”

By the time we made it downstairs, breakfast was almost ready. Marcus was at the table with Corbin and Zach while Cordelia helped her mother and sister with the cooking, and Vince and Layla were sitting in the living room area just off the kitchen. They were cuddled close together on the oversized armchair, smiling as they both rubbed her expanding belly. Watching them bond over their unborn child made me feel something I hadn’t been expecting; it was almost as though I might one day long for a family.

One day, way,
way
into the future.

Ever since Bobby died, and especially since joining the Scottsdale PD, having kids wasn’t something I could see for myself. I couldn’t justify bringing a child into a world where there was so much horror and grief to be had. This was actually the reason David and I fought the night he died. He eventually wanted a family, and I wasn’t sure I’d ever be ready.

But now? Ever since becoming a wolf, I found myself thinking about it a few times—more so whenever I caught a glimpse of Vince and Layla mooning over their unborn bundle of joy. Was it that I had changed my mind, or was it the wolf’s inherent nature to reproduce to carry on the line? Sometimes it felt like a bit of both.

“Brooke,” Marcus greeted as Nick and I reached the table. “The two of you sleep well?”

Nick looked to me for a response, and I knew I shouldn’t continue to lie. “As well as can be expected given everything that’s happened. But I’m hopeful it’s going to get better with time.” I paused, looking to Nick, then the guys at the table, before casting my glance back to Marcus. “I was hoping to talk to you this morning,” I told him.

His eyes lit up expectantly. It wasn’t a surprise he could read me well enough to assume I had accepted his offer. “Oh? I think we’ve got a few minutes.” He glanced past me, and I turned to find Miranda looking in our direction. She offered him a single nod, and then I looked back at Marcus. “We could head to the library for a bit?”

I hadn’t been expecting our meeting to happen right away, but knew it might actually be better that way, so I agreed and followed Marcus out of the dining room. When we entered the library, Marcus closed the heavy wooden doors and faced me. “So, you’ve thought about our earlier discussion?”

“I have,” I replied. “But that’s not the only reason I wanted to meet with you today.”

My tone must have concerned him, because his eyebrows pulled together with questions. “Sounds serious.” He crossed his arms. “What else did you want to discuss?”

There was no sugarcoating it. An Alpha wouldn’t skirt the issue; they would just come out and address the issue at hand. So, with a deep breath, I finally said, “Cordelia.”

M
arcus looked at me for a moment, confused and intrigued, but then concern flashed in his eyes. “Cordelia? Is everything okay?”

I hadn’t meant to worry him, only to make him aware of her struggles at night. “I’m sorry,” I started. “I’m sure it’s nothing—in fact, Nick reminded me that I went through the same thing after we left Scottsdale—but Colby’s worried about her behavior.”

“Her behavior? But she seems fine.”

I nodded. “Yeah. During the day, sure.” My eyebrows pulled together, and I paused briefly. “But at night? Marcus, Colby can’t even sleep in her room. She told me that Cordelia doesn’t sleep.”

“That’s not too shocking, considering all she’s been through.” He was starting to sound defensive, so I held my hands up in supplication.

“No, I get that—believe me, no one gets that more than me, Marcus.”

Sympathy flashed across his face. “Shit. Of course. I didn’t mean—”

“No, I know. I’m not offended.” I took a deep breath. “I saw what Colby was explaining, and it was…unnerving.” Marcus remained silent, his worry thick in the air between us. “I came down for a snack in the middle of the night, and when I headed back upstairs, she was talking to herself, rocking back and forth on her bed. But then, just when I turned to go back to my room, she was at the door in a flash. Her eyes—” I shivered “—they were dark. It might have been a trick of the light or because of how overtired I was, but she acted angry that I’d been spying on her. Then, out of nowhere, she shook it off and she was back to her old self. It was like she was two different people.

“I just…having experienced this after David’s death, I worry about her. I think she might need someone to talk to, or maybe something to help her sleep at night? I don’t know. I’m not really a doctor or educated on this sort of thing, but something definitely strikes me as odd. And this is coming from someone who’s gone through some pretty awful stuff—past and present.”

His eyes locked on mine, his reluctance obvious. “How were you able to overcome it all?”

My lips curled up into a small smile as I simply stated. “Nick. I can’t explain it, but he brought me comfort and peace whenever I started to lose myself.”

“It was likely the bond the two of you share. Your history with one another notwithstanding, his involvement in what happened to you—”

“You mean when he bit me,” I corrected him. “No need to dance around it. I’m dealing with it.”

Marcus tipped his head apologetically. “Yes. When he bit you, bringing you over into this life, it strengthened the bond between the two of you.” A smile formed on his lips, softening his expression slightly. “It’s a rare and beautiful thing when this bond is formed between a mated couple. You two will always be able to sense what the other is feeling, even with miles between you.”

Heaving a sigh, Marcus broke eye contact and turned away. “Thank you for letting me know about Cordy. I haven’t known you to be wrong yet, Brooke, so I’ll look into it and maybe get Miranda to talk to her a little more about what happened. She’s…” He exhaled heavily. “She’s reluctant to talk too much about what she went through.”

I bit my bottom lip nervously before telling him what I’d told Colby the night before. “She feels like you abandoned her after she’d been taken.”

This news surprised Marcus.

“I explained that you hadn’t, of course. I told her you all searched for years, but Gianna had the compound too well hidden.”

I sensed his hurt, could almost feel my heart break along with his as he registered what I’d told him. “We searched every day.”

“I know.”

“But at some point, you just have to accept what is, you know? We thought they’d killed her.”

I rounded the table and laid a hand on his shoulder supportively. “Anyone would have. You can’t blame yourself for this,” I told him. “Gianna is to blame.”

Marcus’s hands curled against the tabletop, scratching the polished wood top. “I wish I could have been there when you killed her.”

I remembered the moment her body turned to ash, and the wolf and I both smiled wistfully. “It was pretty amazing,” I confessed.

He turned to me, eyes burning into mine. “Your brother—”

Bile churned in my stomach, and I shook my head vehemently. Even though, for years, I’d wished for my brother to be alive, seeing what he’d become blinded me with rage. I didn’t ever wanted to be associated with him again. “That thing is
not
my brother.”

“He held her and continued to torture her. He needs to be stopped.”

“And he will be,” I assured him. “You will find him and you will get your revenge.”

Waves of calm flowed through the room as Marcus regarded me, an appreciative smile slowly forming on his lips. “Thank you. It’s not just anyone who can calm me down. I’ve chosen wisely.”

Warmth filled my cheeks and I averted my gaze, humbled. “About that…”

“You’re not turning me down, are you?”

“No, actually,” I confessed confidently. “But I’d like to negotiate some terms.”

Marcus stood up straight again and crossed his arms in front of him. “All business. You continue to impress me. Please, go on.”

I move toward the window, looking out over the yard and toward the mountains. The sky was blue, the sun still rising toward its highest point, and the peaks of the mountains were blanketed by big, fluffy white clouds.

“I’ve only just been introduced to this world, having been bitten a few months ago,” I explained, even though he knew this. “As you know, I still struggle with aspects of my new nature, though I am more open to accepting it all a little more readily. You and Nick are both confident that I’m the perfect fit for the role of Alpha—should I need to step into it—but I’m scared my inexperience could get the Pack killed.”

“Brooke, I already told you I’d train you—we can start this afternoon.” He looked eager, and I couldn’t help but smile.

“That would be perfect. But I feel like I need something more. I want Nick to lead by my side. He knows more about this lifestyle than me—he’s so comfortable with the way things work—and I’ll need him to be there, assuring me. Guiding me.”

Grinning, Marcus nodded. “Nick is a great right-hand man,” he assured me.

“I can see that, but I want Jackson to be my right-hand man. I want Nick to be as respected as me. When he gives an order, I want the Pack to respect what he says in the same way they respect you, and the way I hope they’ll respect me.”

When Marcus didn’t object, hope swelled in my chest. “Jackson?”

I nodded. “We’ve grown close since I’ve come to live here. Having been through similar life experiences, I feel comfortable around him.”

“I’ve noticed.” Marcus took a beat before his posture softened. He surveyed me from head to toe with a quick sweep of his eyes, and his lips quirked, amused. “All right. When Jackson returns to the manor, you and I will talk to him together. Nick will lead the Pack at your side, but you will have first and final say. He will take on the role of your advisor and will take over only in your absence or with your express permission.”

Satisfaction settled over me as I held out my hand for Marcus to shake. Looking down at it, he laughed as he took it, instead pulling me toward him for a hug. “We’ll get started this afternoon,” he told me. “This should keep us occupied while we wait for Jackson to contact us again.”

After breakfast, Marcus and I headed outside. He wanted to test my self-defense skills, and after that, he’d planned a little study session in the library. At first, studying sounded pointless, but Marcus assured me that learning how past Alphas led their packs would help me while I was still trying to find my groove and build a relationship with the Pack.

Out of nowhere, pain exploded in my left cheek as Marcus struck me. I feared my eye socket might shatter. I stumbled to the right, trying to find my balance and retaliate as Marcus stood, unfazed.

“I told you I’m not going to hold back, and neither should you,” Marcus ordered, voice gruff, as I stood up, pressing my hand to the side of my face.

I tasted blood in my mouth and instantly spit it onto the snow, standing upright and squaring my shoulders. “Sorry,” I said, cracking my neck to relieve the tension. “I didn’t realize you were going to sucker punch me.”

Marcus smirked, eyebrows raised as he accepted my snide comment as the challenge it was meant to be. “Oh, really?”

“Yeah,” I quipped. “You gonna come at me again, or are you just going to stand there and lecture me?”

Marcus and I lunged for each other. He threw several punches in quick succession, and I dodged each one before grabbing his wrist on the last one and gracefully moving around him and kicking the back of his knee, sending him to the ground.

Breathing heavily, he looked up at me, his black hair in his face. “Very good,” he praised, standing up.

My mistake was in accepting his praise as an opportunity to rest.

He was on his feet and attacking me again before I could even register what had happened. When he said he wasn’t going to hold back, he wasn’t joking. It took me until after the back of his left hand connected with my face before I was able to recover. Using the momentum from his hit, I twisted around, crouching low and sweeping my leg under his, knocking him onto his back.

As I approached to go in for “the kill,” Marcus acted fast, grabbing one of my ankles and yanking my feet out from under me. I hit the frozen ground hard, the cold snow melting against my rising temperature and soaking the back of my clothes. Even though my head was a little foggy from the impact, I successfully performed a backward somersault, but the minute I got to my feet, I stumbled, my balance affected. I wobbled again, suddenly nauseous as well as dizzy, and something told me this wasn’t related to the fight—something else was wrong.

Before I could fall back to the ground, a strong arm wrapped itself around my waist and I rested against the warm body to my right.

“Jesus,” Nick growled. “What did you do to her?”

Marcus rushed over, the snow crunching under his shoes. Warm hands cupped my face, coaxing my gaze up. My vision was fuzzy, slowly clearing until I looked into Marcus’s eyes. “Get her inside and upstairs. I’ll send Miranda up.”

The urgency in his voice should have worried me—and it did a little—but my darkening vision took precedence. In one fell sweep of his arms, Nick had me cradled against his body as he rushed me inside and upstairs. I closed my eyes as he lowered me to the bed, and I rolled onto my side.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his tone clipped with worry. “He should have gone easy on you. You weren’t ready.”

My eyes fluttered open, and I tried to sit up, only to succumb to the dizziness and nausea again. “It wasn’t him,” I replied, my voice hoarse. “Everything was fine. We were sparring, I was kicking his ass for the most part, and then…everything went dark and I got really dizzy.”

“How long have you been feeling this way?” a soft voice said from the doorway. I opened my eyes and let my vision focus on Miranda as she entered the room with a small black bag in her hands. “You’ve been feeling a little under the weather for a while, no?”

Nick looked between us, eyebrows furrowed and his blue eyes reflecting his worry.

I had to think about it. Yeah, I’d been sick, but I figured it was just a side effect of the silver nitrate expelling itself from my body and eating so much again after starving myself for a couple of weeks. It had only been a few days; maybe I was still adjusting.