Blue Christmas (The Moody Blue Trilogy | Book One) (22 page)

“It’s about time. Go ahead and get the water heated up. I’ll be right
there.”

Laura rolled her eyes and shook her head.

“Uh, no, Jason
.”
Hannah headed toward the door. “You will shower
in here. And I suggest you make it a
cold
shower. Know what I mean?” She
threw a towel at him and left the room.

Ten minutes later, Hannah crossed the hall still toweling her hair. She
slung the towel around her neck and started brushing out her long, wet curls as
she walked into Jason’s room. “You done yet?”

“Yeah, just about. Wow. You look great.” He smiled, lassoing her neck
with his towel. He pulled her into his arms.

She melted into his embrace, her head pressed against his bare chest. The
scent of his freshly washed skin sent a warm wave through her body. Jason took
a deep breath, his face nuzzled against her wet hair.

“Mmm . . . you smell good.” He kissed the tip of her nose
and leaned his forehead against hers. “I wish it didn’t have to be like this. There
are a thousand places I’d rather be than in this hospital under these
circumstances.”

“I know,” she sighed.

“Hey, I’ve got an idea. Let’s get out of here for a while. What do you
say?”

“I don’t know, Jason. Do you think we should? I mean, what if Jackson
woke up and we weren’t here? Or what if something—”

“I have my cell phone. We’ll tell Mom and Dad to call us if anything
happens. I need some fresh air. We won’t go far. Maybe just down the street for
some good coffee or something. Oh, I know! Do you like Krispy Kremes? Let’s go
get some Krispy Kremes. Forget the hot buffet. I’m craving serious carbs. What
do you say?”

“I’d love to. If you think it’s okay?”

He pulled her along behind him, heading down the hall. “But we’ll have to
use one of the limos. We’d never get out of here on our own. Do you mind if
someone drives us?”

“Whatever.” She reached for his hand as they hurried down the hall.

Laura and Frank rounded the corner. When Jason told them their plans, Laura
wasn’t pleased. “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea, honey. I know you’re
restless, but what if you run into some crowds of well-wishers or—”

“Mom, we’ll be fine. I play this game all the time, remember? Besides, we
won’t be gone that long and we’ll be careful. Call us if you need to, okay?”

With that, they picked up their pace and sprinted down the hall to find
George, the limo driver. Taking some back hallways, they avoided the crowds and
made their way to a secluded section of the parking garage. Hopping into the
limousine, they were whisked away from the hospital and down a side road to
freedom.

“Any change?” Alli asked as she entered Jackson’s room.

“No, sweetheart. No change,” Jane Greer answered, giving her a hug.

Bob and Jane stood on opposite sides of their son’s bed. Jane reached
out, brushing the hair back off his forehead. She traced his strong jaw line
with her fingers, smiling wearily.

“I’m still not used to this stubble. It seems like only yesterday his
voice had just begun to crack. He couldn’t
wai
t for some facial hair. So
excited when it finally started coming in. Course, it was nothing but the
slightest appearance of peach fuzz on that chin. But he was so proud. Now, look
at him—he fills this whole bed and he’s got a face full of stubble.”

“C’mon, honey,” Bob said. “We promised to give Alli some time with him
before they kick us all out to bathe him.” He leaned over and planted a kiss on
his son’s forehead, pausing to whisper. “Today’s the day, Jackson. C’mon,
buddy, it’s time to wake up. We love you, big guy.”

Alli watched Jane place Jackson’s arm across his chest again. She leaned
over her son, lingering as she kissed his cheek as she had surely done a
thousand times in his lifetime. “I love you, sweetheart.”

A few moments later, they were gone.

Alone with Jackson for the first time in several hours, Alli fought her
despair. She decided to make the best of it, assuming he would hear her every
word.

“You know, Jackson, if you’d just snap out of this, you could have hot
biscuits and gravy from Cracker Barrel. Does that sound good? There’s a ton of
food out there. Course, I haven’t felt much like eating but I would if you’d
just wake up.” She looked down at his peaceful face, wishing she could will him
to open his eyes.

Instead she blew out a heavy sigh, sitting down beside the bed and taking
his hand into hers. She leaned over to kiss his hand, then laid her cheek
against his open palm. “Please wake up, Jackson. I’m so lonely without you.
Even with all these people around, I feel so empty without you.”

She lifted her head, suddenly aware how tired she was. When his eyes
remained closed, his expression the same, she slowly laid her head back down
and gave in to the fatigue. With her eyes closed, she felt herself drifting off
to sleep, the steady beep, beep, beep of Jackson’s monitor the only sound she
could hear.

She began to stir, thinking she’d surely slept an hour or more. She
looked at her watch, surprised it had only been around fifteen minutes. Suddenly,
she realized what had awakened her. The beeping had stopped! Still trying to
shake off the grogginess, she snapped her head up to look at the monitor. Why
was it stuck? Instead of beeping, it shrieked at her.

That’s when she noticed the flat line.

“Jackson! JACKSON! NOOOOO!” Her scream bounced off the walls. “SOMEBODY!
HELP ME! Oh Jackson—oh God, please don’t let him die! Jackson! JACKSON!
Nooooooo!”

She stumbled to the door just as it flew open with a team of doctors and
nurses racing to Jackson’s bedside with a crash cart. They shouted orders and
yelled to each other, oblivious to her cries. She tore through them, sobbing
and begging them to help him. “PLEASE! You have to save him! You can’t let him
die!”

“Get her out of here STAT!” one of the doctors yelled.

A nurse grabbed her, quickly propelling her toward the door. “You have to
leave right now. You can’t help him if you’re in the way.”

“Noooo! I can’t leave him! Oh God, please! Please don’t let him die!” She
pulled away from the nurse. “Let me go! LEAVE ME ALONE!”

The voices of the doctors and others on the team rose in a feverish
pitch. “We’re losing him! His blood pressure is plunging . . . Doctor,
I can’t find a pulse.”

The room spun wildly around Alli as she fought against the strong arms of
the nurse who kept shoving her out the door. With every ounce of her strength,
she screamed—

“
JACKSON
!”

Chapter 16

A
cross town, the limousine stopped
at a deserted city park. Jason and Hannah climbed out of the luxury car,
carrying a bag of warm donuts fresh from Krispy Kreme and two large cups of
coffee. They had purchased a separate order for George who gladly remained in
the warmth of his car. Both wearing sunglasses and ball caps, they looked like
a couple of ordinary college kids out for a visit to the park on a winter
morning.

They sat on top of a picnic table beside a partially frozen creek. Their
breath escaped in puffs of smoke, but they drank in the crisp, fresh air and
bright sunshine.

“I’m glad we decided to do this. I don’t think I realized how confined I
was feeling at the hospital.” She looked over the rim of her cup as she sipped
the hot brew. He’d become quiet in the last few minutes, his face more serious.
She set her cup down. “Are you okay?”

He was looking across the park. She did the same. The swings on a
swing-set moved back and forth in the breeze, each one in its own rhythm. The
sunlight sparkled off the snow, making both of them glare despite the
sunglasses.

He bit into a glazed donut then took a sip of coffee. She wasn’t used to
seeing him so silent. He had every reason in the world to be that way, but she
was surprised how uncomfortable it made her. Attempting to hide her concern,
she took a tiny bite of her own donut and looked off another direction. Moments
passed. She drained the rest of her coffee only to hear him humming quietly. It
was not a melody she recognized.

She took a chance. “Is that a new song?”

He didn’t answer right away but kept humming. Finally, “Just something
I’ve been working on for a few days.”

“Sing it for me.”

He stole a look at her above the rim of his sunglasses and attempted a
smile. “I don’t think so. Not yet.” He turned and looked away again.

Four, maybe five minutes passed. Nothing. Only the pieces of a sad melody
drifting through the air between them. She pulled up her legs, hugging her
knees, resting her head on them. She closed her eyes.

“Hannah?”

“Yes?” she answered, not looking up.

Silence again.
What was he trying to say?

She heard him moving but was too afraid to look up. The table shook as he
stood up on it. She felt his hands press down on her shoulders as he lowered
himself to sit behind her, his legs sliding out on either side of her. Slowly,
he wrapped his arms around her waist and laid his head on her shoulder.

Hannah couldn’t breathe. She sensed something was wrong, but didn’t have
a clue why he was acting so strange. Half an hour earlier they’d been laughing,
cutting up in the hospital room with his parents. Now he was struggling and she
didn’t know why. Was it Jackson? Was it all the ups and downs the group had
been through this week? What? Jason was never at a loss for words, so why was
he so quiet now?

And why is it scaring me?

Despite the thick jackets between them she could feel his heart pounding
against her back. That same heart that caused millions of fans around the world
to collectively hold their breath when it underwent surgery years ago. What
would it have been like to know him then like she knew him now? No, it would
have been too frightening to pace the halls of a hospital while the surgeons
worked on him for endless hours. She thought of Alli. Could she have handled
sitting beside Jason waiting and hoping for him to wake up again as Alli had
been doing for Jackson? She shivered at the thought.

She felt Jason’s arms tighten around her. “Hannah?”

“Yes?”

“We have to talk.”

Her eyes stung. The wave of butterflies rippled through her stomach again.
It was the tone of his voice. So different. So, so serious. She swallowed hard.
“I’m listening.”

He rested his head on her shoulder again. “We have to talk about us.”

Oh no. Not now. Please not now.
She shook her head. It was the
best she could do.

“You know, it’s only been ten days since we met.” His voice sounded
strained. Hushed.

Is he saying good-bye? Here? Now? Please not now. Not yet.

“Can you believe that?” he continued. “It seems like we’ve been together
forever. At least to me it does.”

She let out a long breath. “I know,” she whispered. “Me too, Jason.”

Now it was his turn to take a deep breath and let it out. She shivered at
the feel of it against her neck. Out of her periphery she could see the white
cloud of his breath.

“Remember that first night we were together at Mom and Dad’s? And I told
you that on my way home for Christmas I prayed and asked God to make this a
really special Christmas?”

“I remember,” she smiled, cherishing the memory of that night.

“Well, this last week or so . . . I’ve thought a lot about
that prayer. And I realized something. It was you, Hannah. I have no doubt in
my mind. I didn’t even know exactly what I was praying for . . .
I wasn’t even thinking about some
one
coming into my life like this. But
there you were—the stray my mom picked up on Christmas Eve.”

She poked him gently with her elbow.

“Don’t get me wrong. I like strays,” he said quietly, the slightest trace
of humor in his voice. “But more important, I like
you
. I told you
before, Hannah, I love you. I mean that. You probably think you don’t know me
well enough to trust me, but I promise you, I don’t use those words unless I
mean it from the bottom of my heart.”

She swallowed again. The knot in her stomach squeezed her breath away.

“And the more I’ve thought about it, the more I’ve realized . . .
it wasn’t just a coincidence that God brought you into my life that night. At
first I thought, this is great—Hannah’s fun, we’re having an awesome time
together. It’s the holidays. Mom and Dad obviously like you a lot. Cool
Christmas gift, y’know?

“But then Gevin told us he was quitting the group, and we all started
fighting. And then Jackson—” He sighed again. “Jackson got shot and the world
stood still.”

He lifted his head, taking the ball cap off her head and stroking his
fingers through her long hair. “But through every moment of all of that,
Hannah, you’ve been right here with me. I can’t even imagine how I would have
made it through without you. Mom was right about that. It’s like . . .
as if God knew I would need you. And He gave you to me right when I needed you
most.”