Blue Abyss: Timewalker Chronicles, Book 3 (The Timewalker Chronicles) (36 page)

He stared down at Mari’s face, the soft curve of her pink lips, the delicate arch of her black brows, her creamy skin and elegant jaw. She was truly beautiful, and worth any sacrifice. Any. Sacrifice.

He’d always thought of his humanity as a weakness. He’d believed it was the reason he and his twin brother were abandoned by their Immortal mother, left with his father after birth. It was the reason he bled, the reason he would eventually die. It made him feel things he didn’t want to feel. Pain. Despair. Fear. It made him crave touch, and love.

Love.

He’d rejected his human side long ago, locked it away. Hated himself. Hated the weakness. The vulnerability.

Only now did he realize the truth. The Timewalkers knew. Tim and Sarah? Mari? They all had something neither he, nor Teagh, nor Droghan had ever understood.

Their humanity was the reason they could win the war.

This was the reason. This…

Teagh stood beside him in the water, but the male was a blurry outline of form in Raiden’s peripheral vision. Everything faded, surrounded by a fog, dimmed as his awareness left them behind. They belonged to another time, another life. He had one last mission to complete. One. And he would not fail.

One thing remained crystal clear in his mind’s eye. Just one.

Mari.

Mark or no Mark, he loved her. Could taste her tears. Hear her voice whispering to him in the dark. Feel the warmth of her touch. The scent of her skin lingered in his nose. The soft glide of silk filled his palms as he held her head and pulled her close for a kiss. One. Last. Kiss.

A goddess. He held a goddess in his arms. And she deserved so much better than what he had to offer her. So much better. But his life was the only thing he had to give her.

Without her? He was nothing. “A dead man walking,” Tim had said.

He’d rather be dead.

Raiden kissed Mari’s brow and pressed his cheek to hers, his whispered promise the most sacred vow he’d ever uttered. “I will find you.”

Immortals could wish for death, pray for death, imagine a thousand creative ways to incinerate, decapitate, stab, poison, maim, and attempt to die.

Without Angel’s Fire, they lived anyway. And so, dreaming about death became a sick game for some, for others, something forgotten entirely, not worth considering.

But Raiden had always been a half-breed. He’d had to face things they did not, decisions they did not. Risks. Yes, he would live a long life. Hundreds of years, perhaps longer. But ultimately he would die.

But humanity brought with it a gift so powerful most Immortals feared to consider the possibility. A mortal, a human, could choose to leave his body behind. A mortal could will himself to die.Raiden did. He would find her where her spirit walked. He would bring her back, or he would follow wherever she led. She didn’t belong to him. He understood that now. He belonged to her. Body and soul. And she damn sure wasn’t going to leave him behind.

Chapter Fifteen

Mari hovered in the air. Dead. She was dead. She knew that, but couldn’t figure out why she was still here, in Teagh’s house, staring at a damn rock. It hypnotized her and she couldn’t look away, couldn’t leave. Ridiculous. She was dead, and her soul was stuck to this rock like a paperclip to a magnet. She could not move away.

Where was she supposed to go? Was she supposed to do something now? Were Celestina and her big warrior going to swoop in and try to save her again? Most likely not. She’d done her job, found Teagh, rescued Raiden, and killed a few bad guys along the way. Game over. Sure, there were more caves to explore, more bad guys to hunt, but Tim and Sarah could blast them with lightning. Raiden could find some Immortals and hop a space ship back to wherever it was he came from. She’d done her job. They didn’t need her anymore, and she was tired of the pain.

She’d felt the fire on her shoulder when Teagh touched her, but the heat and the pain of her injures together had failed to drown out the pleasure of being in Raiden’s arms again, even if she were bleeding out at the time. He’d come for her. He’d held her. He’d acted like he cared.

Perhaps he’d learned to love her, maybe a little bit. It was a fantasy she’d cling to for eternity…wherever the hell that was. And just exactly when was this afterlife she’d heard about supposed to start? Staring at a brilliant crystal was intriguing, but not what she’d envisioned in Sunday school. The flashing rays of light trapped her, held her mind and spirit captive more effectively than steel bars. It was like the stone was actually imbedded within her, feeding off her spirit like a leech sucks blood from its host.

How long could she stay like this? How much time would pass before the stone destroyed her? Until there was nothing left? How much time had already passed? There was no sense of time here. It could have been a few minutes, or a few years. All she knew was the light within that crystal never went out and her aching heart never stopped loving a man who’d been destined to walk away from her.

Perhaps she should fight the stone’s hypnotic power. But it was so beautiful, so serene and perfect, that she had trouble holding the thought.

Until fire stabbed through her shoulder. Not the mild heat of Teagh’s presence, but a smoldering blade of sizzling energy pierced the veil of fog over her mind. A shadow stepped between her and the stone, the outline of the man she had loved and lost, the man who’d made it clear he would never be hers, didn’t want to be hers.

What was he doing here? Mari shifted her awareness from the stone to the male before her. Was he injured? Dead? After everything she’d gone through to save him, was he dead now, too? Would God be that cruel to her? Did she have a voice to ask?

Yes. She discovered that she did, and the tone of her voice here echoed through the area around her like a perfectly tuned wind chime. Her voice hummed with energy and power. “Raiden? Is that you?”

“Mari.” The shadow solidified into her heart’s desire. Silvery-gray hair tipped with black. Those eyes. The chest she’d slept snuggled against. The lips she’d kissed. So, had she made it to some version of heaven after all? Or was this hell? Would he continue to tempt her, touch her, and break her heart over and over, forever?

She couldn’t do it. Wouldn’t do it.

“Raiden, I’m dead.”

“Not yet, Mari. Even now, Mother Earth heals your broken body.” He stepped closer, this ghost that shouldn’t be here in her afterlife, and traced the outline of her face with a butterfly soft touch of warm fingertips. She didn’t want to lean into his touch but her soul didn’t listen. It yearned. It needed. It simply hungered for him. How could she feel his touch here, when she had no body? How could he seduce her so easily when she was nothing but a spirit? Damn it all, why did she ache for him so completely that she’d have been sobbing if she’d had eyes? She. Was. Dead.

“No. I won’t do this anymore, Raiden. Go. Fight your war. Hunt the monsters. Do your duty. Leave me in peace.”

“I can’t.” Raiden’s fingertips trailed from her cheek down her neck, across her shoulder and down her arm until he held her hand. “I can’t go back without you.”

Mari shook her head.

Raiden wrapped his free arm around her and pulled her tightly to him. “I don’t want to go back without you, Mari.”

Mari gave in to temptation and pretended this phantom spoke from the heart, that his words were true. She wrapped her arms around his waist, placed her cheek against his chest. Why the hell not? She was dead already. Her heart lay shattered and in pieces. Broken. What else could possibly happen…? “Raiden? Why isn’t your heart beating?”

“Where you go, I go.” Raiden locked his arms around her until they felt like steel beams encircling her. Unbreakable. “This life or the next.”

“No.” Mari shook her head and pulled back just enough to look up into a pair of deathly serious eyes. He meant it. He would follow her to the other side, wherever that was. Or stay here with her forever, trapped and staring at the pretty stone… “No.”

“You are mine and I am yours, Timewalker.” He leaned down, and Mari melted into the heat of his kiss. A kiss was different here. Hotter. Sweeter. The roiling emotions she suppressed for this man burst forth from deep within her soul like a volcanic eruption, blowing her heart wide open. And still he kissed her. She tasted love on his lips, the burst of longing and tenderness sweeter than milk chocolate and marshmallow cream on her tongue.

There was no hiding here. There were no secrets, no lies. No deceit or second guessing. Here, they were pure spirit, and they were flaring up, brighter and hotter than a wildfire. One flame.

Two souls, one heartbeat. Connected.

Why couldn’t he have loved her like this before? Why did he have to love her now, when it was too late? Maybe he didn’t. Perhaps this was all just another one of her cruel and cursed dreams. That made more sense. One last excruciating and tortuous dream.

Why not? She’d suffered a thousand nightmares. Died a thousand deaths.

None of them had hurt this badly.

Aching, she tore her lips from her phantom lover, but couldn’t bear to break contact completely, even if he were just a dream, even if touching him burned her essence to ashes. She kissed the corner of his mouth, allowed her lips to linger on the raspy curve of his jaw. It wasn’t fair. Life.

Mari closed her eyes and pressed her forehead to Raiden’s clean-shaven cheek. Life was a bitch all right. One cold-hearted, unforgiving bitch. “God, why did I have to love you so damn much?”

“Mari…” Raiden’s hand burrowed into her hair at the nape of her neck and held her to him.

“And why didn’t you love me back?” And there it was. The big question. The heart-breaking, soul-stealing, grind-her-heart-under-a-boot-heel question. The one that really hurt. Why? She’d given up everything for him. Chased myths. Risked her life. Been laughed at. Died. Travelled through time. Loved him.

She’d loved him. Loved him still, even if he didn’t love her back, would never love her back.

Couldn’t love her.

She tried to convince herself that the why didn’t matter, not anymore. Surely, he could have loved her. Or was she too crazy? Too stubborn? Too abrasive?

Was she not beautiful enough? Caring enough? Smart enough?

Perhaps that was it. She was a fool who’d spent her life chasing the monsters under the bed. She’d found them, all right. And they’d killed her.

Not much of a fairy tale, at least not the happily-ever-after fairy princess variety. More like the brothers Grimm, where everyone died. The end.

Red-shirt ensign after all. Cue the curtain.

Mari tried to pull away, to let go of the pain, but Raiden’s arms tightened and he shook his head. “No, Mari. No.”

“What are you doing?” Mari shoved against his chest, nipped at his jaw in an absolute attempt at self-preservation. “Let me go.”

“I can’t.” Raiden loosened his hold just enough for her to lean back and stare up into his eyes. “I love you, Mari. I love you. I don’t care about the war, or the Crux, or the Triscani. I don’t care. Wherever you go, I go. Do you hear me? This life or the next. I am yours. Heart and soul. Alive or dead. I am yours.”

Mari froze, unable to comprehend the vehemence of his pledge. But then his lips found hers again, and the kiss rocketed through her nerve endings like scorching jet fuel from her head to the very tips of her toes. She gasped, and clung to him, starving for more heat, more fiery lust, more love. It poured off him in waves, a halo of energy she basked in. His love for her poured into her and healed her broken heart. It wound its way through her soul and set her skin on fire.

It healed her broken body and jumped-started her dead heart more efficiently than a jolt of electricity could have. And it burned through their bond, made the mark on her shoulder scream with unbridled energy.

Still he kissed her, pressed her body to his, chest to chest, hip to hip, thigh to thigh. Mouth to mouth. He held her, a willing captive, one hand buried in her hair and the other splayed in white-hot seduction at the small of her back.

Alive. She felt alive.

The kiss never faded. One moment she was a spirit, not much more than mist, and the next they were flesh and blood, and his lips tasted of salt and desire. His hands, their pose, the love flowing between them didn’t change. She could feel him now, his soul deep inside her. A part of her. Forever.

Mari gasped, anticipating the pain that she knew must await her in her physical form. There was none. She glowed, literally glowed with soft golden light as warmth flowed through every cell and her body was made whole by the energy of her bond to Raiden. The healing pulse of Mother Earth caressed her with softly cresting waves that swirled and rocked them from the waist down where they somehow stood in the water.

Raiden held her upright. Safe. In his arms. The only place she’d ever really wanted to be.

“Was it true?” She wanted to believe him, wanted it more than she wanted to breathe or eat or live. But she’d been burned by him too many times, lived through too many nightmares. Frankly, she no longer trusted her judgment when it came to him. She’d give him everything. Believe anything. All he had to do was ask…

Raiden inspected her with his eyes as he frantically ran his hands over every inch her body. “Are you well? Your injuries, are they healed?”