Read Blown for Good Behind the Iron Curtain of Scientology Online
Authors: Marc Headley
Tags: #Religion, #General, #Biography & Autobiography, #Cults, #Scientology, #Ex-Cultists
Once I righted myself and Dave had stopped punching me, he took a step back. Although in pain and startled, I knew what would come next. It was my turn. I looked right into his eyes and started to advance towards him slowly.
“I am sorry, Marc, I should not have done that. I am sorry. Take a walk, man! Walk it off. Get yourself together!” Dave said frantically.
I was immediately grabbed by three people and shoved in the direction of the exit. I headed towards the door that led outside.
“Did you see that? He was actually going to hit me just then!” Dave said as I made my way out the door.
“You bet I was!” I said under my breath as I went through the door.
Several people were sent to console me and profusely apologize for Dave hitting me. Greg Wilhere was the first to show up. Greg told me that Dave personally wanted to make sure that I knew that he had lost it and he never should have hit me and that he was sorry for what had happened.
The next girl who came and found me told me that it had been an hour and asked if I was cool and would come back to the building. I agreed that I would, but if Dave ever even thought about touching me ever again, I would do whatever was needed to teach him a lesson.
“You really were going to hit him, weren’t you?” she asked. “I could see it in your eyes.”
“Yes, I was. If I weren’t grabbed, I would probably be in the back of a police car by this time. I really was planning on hitting him. Hard. Someone has to stand up to this crap. Everyone knows that it is wrong. But no one ever does anything,” I told her, still pissed that I was pulled away from him at the last second.
Well, after this, I did not last very much longer on the A/V Manufacturing Director post. I obviously disagreed with COB and that I tried to punch him out as well was not helping any. But I was not to be posted anywhere else but in Manufacturing, which I think was Dave’s way of making sure that I saw what he was doing and it was his way of rubbing my nose in it.
I had been flying below the radar for sometime in A/V Manufacturing. I was the UV Coating I/C. I would put UV coating on printed products used for labels and binder transcripts. I was about as low as one could get on the totem pole and I was completely content.
I did not have to attend any meetings with Dave Miscavige. I did not have to report up every five seconds about where I stood on all the orders I had from him. I did not have a worry in the world except how many papers I coated each day. As long as I did all that I was given to do, life was simple. Most parts of the printing line ahead of me could not produce more than one other guy and I could coat in one day, so it was a lower stress activity. I was still working over 100 hours per week, but not being yelled at during 80 of them.
I had lost an insane amount of weight since being on this post. I did not know for certain why. I think it was a combination of several things: not eating, standing all day at my machine, walking to and from my berthing each day, working with highly toxic UV chemicals and standing next to a very powerful bank of UV lights. I had not really noticed the weight loss until a lot of chubby people kept asking me what diet I was doing. Most of the women who had desk jobs could easily stack up the pounds if they did not watch it. The diet at the Int Base was so horrible; and with no time for exercise, it was just a losing battle.
There had been a flurry of activity happening lately. A new org in Spain was supposed to open in a few weeks and then right after that a new org in New York was being opened. These were both Ideal Orgs based on Dave’s grand plan to re-do all orgs in the world.
Every time a new Ideal Org was opened, Gold would get our butts kicked to get the A/V systems installed. No matter how much was done on the org in terms of construction, if the systems were not installed ahead of time and set up perfectly, Dave Miscavige would wreak havoc on Gold. It was a sure thing, you could bet on it; Spain and New York were on a collision course with an angry Dave Miscavige.
The A/V Systems area had two people in it and there was no way that the new systems for these orgs would be built without other people doing it for them. The only guy in the area who was any use was Trevor. He was the guy that built the systems but also the same guy who had to install them at the orgs. He was a good guy but being in two places at the same time was not his specialty. I felt sorry for him and wanted to do whatever I could, so I would occasionally sneak off and build a few cassette decks or film room computer systems whenever he needed it. I had to be very discreet and make sure that no one saw me while I was doing this stuff, though. It was not that I was not qualified to build the systems, I had been busted off post by Dave and since A/V systems was a subject that he was very vocal about, people wanted me to help without Dave seeing that I was helping.
Trevor was just about to take off to Spain to install a bunch of systems and I told him that I would help him from Gold if he needed it. Trevor was the kind of guy who would regularly reach his busting point, throw a hissy fit and then walk off angry. A few hours later he would show back up like nothing had happened. Where he went or what he did, I was not sure, but this would happen at least once or twice a month.
Well, Trevor was supposed to be leaving for Spain and he did not have what he needed to take with him. He threw one of his fits and disappeared. I tried to wrap up as much as I knew he needed and pack it up for shipment out to Spain.
I went back down to A/V Manufacturing and did some more UV coating. The next day Trevor came down and saw me. He thanked me for what I had done and gave me a list of the stuff he still needed for Spain and some stuff that he would need for New York.
“You know, someone should be in New York right now installing the systems they need there,” I told Trevor.
“I know. I have been saying that for the last month but there is ’no one’ to send,” Trevor conceded apathetically. “It will flap and then I will pass out ‘told you so’ tickets.”
“Okay, man, have fun,” I said facetiously.
I managed to build everything on Trevor’s wish list for both Spain and New York in the next couple of days and ship them out to both locations.
As I was getting back to work in UV coating one day, I was approached by the Manufacturing Sec, a girl named Caroline. She was in way over her head on this post. I doubted she would last more than another year or so. She explained to me that a mission needed to go to New York org to install all of the new A/V systems. I explained to her that I had already built all of the components they needed and shipped them out earlier that week.
“I know that, Marc, I’m telling you because YOU are going to go install the New York AV systems,” she said.
The truth was that I loved working on systems. It one the one thing that I did at the Int Base that I actually truly loved and had fun while doing it. That is why I think I was never allowed to do that as my post. I just had too much fun and no one could stand that. For my last ten years at the Int Base, I had always gravitated back to working on A/V systems and someone would always take me off it. I was still, no matter what anybody said, the most qualified to work on systems and knew more technically than anybody else by far. But as of late I had given up on trying to work on it more than a few hours here and there. I did it more to help out and keep my chops up on the subject.
“You really think that is a good idea?” I asked. “I mean, I was born on the weekend, but not last weekend.”
“I know. No one thinks this is a good idea. It is our only option to get the systems done and ready before COB arrives in New York after Spain is opened,” she said.
“Well, whose idea was it to send me?”
“Marc Yager is the one that approved it,” she answered.
“I am so not going.” I walked back over to my UV coating machine. This conversation was over.
Marc Yager had been behind every bad thing that had ever happened to me. The IAS Tapes in 1993, the QC Gold fiasco in Clearwater, the A/V Manufacturing proposal and then the Systems blow up the year before. This guy was bad news. If I had learned my lesson, it was that any time I had been involved with something this guy had worked out, it would end up bad. I could already think this one through and see what he had planned. I would go to New York, the systems would flap with COB and Marc Yager would hang the whole flap right around my neck and that would be the end of me. I think it was well known that I did not have a high opinion of Marc Yager and he and I had clashed before on a number of occasions.
No way, I was not going to do it. No matter how much I loved working on A/V systems, this was just a trap.
“If you refuse to do this, Marc Yager is going to use that against you when it flaps in the end,” Caroline said to me.
It was a familiar position to be in at the Int base. Screwed if you do, screwed if you don’t. I had been here before and knew what would happen.
“Well, I guess I am flexible. When do I leave?” I asked Caroline.
“Tomorrow morning,” she answered. “You should go up to CMO Int and get briefed by them on exactly what is needed.”
“Okay,” I said. This sucked. It was a total set up.
I arrived in CMO Int. They were expecting me. I was told about all the stuff that had been happening in New York and where they stood on what they were supposed to have installed. The org was not even done being renovated. The renovations usually had to be completed before the systems could be installed and tested. This was the normal routine with these new orgs. They would drag the renovations on until the last possible second and then everything else would have to be done practically overnight in order to be ready by the time COB rolled in to inspect the place.
The only difference about this New York org was that with the time left, I did not see how it could possibly be done by the time the org was supposed to open. It was physically impossible. I told the CMO Int guys this. They knew this already.
“That is why it was decided to send you, Marc. If anyone could get this done, it was you. We have no other options,” the girl from CMO Int said.
“Who is going to go with me?” I asked.
“Gerald Duncan,” she replied.
Gerald Duncan was the Director of Inspections & Reports Gold. He knew nothing about systems. In fact if you could pick the one person who knew the least about systems, Gerald Duncan was probably the person you would pick.
I did not even have to ask why Gerald was being sent. Gerald often went to events to watch over people and make sure they did not blow. And if someone needed to be escorted back to Gold from an event and needed to be watched on the plane on the way back, Gerald was the guy. Gerald used to be a security guard. He was basically a Sea Org police officer. When someone blew from the Int Base, Gerald would routinely be involved with tracking them down and bringing them back. In my case, he would go with me so I would not even have a chance to blow at any point during my trip to New York.
In order to have a proper Sea Org mission, you had to have at least two people. A Mission I/C and a 2nd were the minimum required to send out a mission. I would be the Mission I/C and Gerald would be my Mission 2nd. What a complete joke. This had been planned down to the last detail of how I would be escorted back to the base after this became the biggest flap Gold had seen in years.
I packed enough stuff from Systems Gold to build everything I would need plus anything I could think of that I might run into while there. I had approximately two weeks to install over $400,000 worth of A/V systems in New York. I had never been to this installation site and the renovations happening there were not going to be done for another week or two at least.
I also packed a few other things that I might need in case I had to make a break for it while there. I had a laptop that I always used that had Internet access if I needed it. I also had my Nextel phone and I knew I could probably orchestrate an escape on the fly depending on the situation.
Gerald and I rode down to the airport together. He explained to me that he would do what he could to help, but that he was really just coming to make sure I did not take off. I could care less about him. He would be absolutely no use to me whatsoever. I did enjoy the thought that I would be pulling probably at least ten all-nighters over the next two weeks, and poor ol’ Gerald was going to have to keep up with me if he was to be my full time watchdog. He would never make it. I knew that. Here was a guy that did nothing more than enforce arbitrary penalties and pass out life sentences handed down from COB. He never made anything. He did not actually work; he was a pencil pusher with a badge.
When we showed up in New York it was worse than I thought. The place was at least 3 weeks away from being completed on renovations alone. COB was arriving in 18 days. I probably needed at least a week or so after the renovations were completed before I could finish the installations.
The girl in charge of the renovations was from the Int Landlord Office, I knew her really well. Her name was Alex. I had planned out at least fifty individual Ideal Orgs with her and where all the film rooms and systems would be located. She was a bit of a wild card in terms of what she did. Even though she was from Int Landlord Office, she was almost never there. She was always out in some org overseeing renovations.
Alex showed me around and told me that she had been asking for someone from systems for weeks. There were a lot of systems that could be installed in the few areas that were completed. I planned to have those done in the next week. I set up shop in one of the course rooms. I built all of my systems in there and installed each one as I finished it and as renovations were completed.
After the first all-nighter, Gerald said he would be going to sleep and that I needed to check in with him if I went anywhere. I had not even been over to where we were supposed to be sleeping yet! The next night I went over there. The room was in the CLO EUS berthing building. The room was slightly bigger than the bunk bed that had been installed. If you were not in the bed, and someone opened the door you would have to get into the bed in order for them to get in the door. The room was small. I would not be there much so did not really care. I dumped a few of my clothes there and took a shower.