Authors: Virginia Nelson,Saranna DeWylde,Rebecca Royce,Alyssa Breck,Ripley Proserpina
Everything changed around him while he waited for life inside his four walls. She had shown up and turned things upside down. The same soul as his beloved…how were such things possible? Benyamin had reminded me over and over that she was not the same woman. They would have some things in common and he needed to find out if he liked this new woman enough to pursue her. Or if she liked him.
He’d started out about as badly as was possible. But, he’d been so preoccupied with wanting to kill her so he could justify ending his own existence in the dark night that he’d not been prepared for the onslaught from the monster inside of him.
Based on what little he knew of modern women, he believed they still liked nice meals. Faking his way through his for the benefit of those around him would be disgusting. The smell of food turned his stomach, and he’d overfed to counter what he knew would be the keening need to eat caused by many humans in such a small place.
Once upon a time, it hadn’t been a problem.
But he’d let it all go when she died.
Her soul had sought him out. What other explanation could there be for her arrival at his home? The world was too big for that kind of coincidence. There was unfinished business, or perhaps she had need of his help. He wasn’t foolish enough to believe she would want love from him. Constantia had been a vampire when he met her. A young one—impetuous and newly made. He’d guided her, helped her. Love had come later. He knew nothing about what he should do with a human woman.
When he’d been a human male, he’d had no idea, either.
Five minutes passed while he sat and mused at the table. The waiter had come by looking to do something, anything for him while he waited for Essence. Then, like a breeze entering a hot room, she entered.
Her simple black dress stopped right above her knees, showing off her long legs Her blond hair was pulled back into a low ponytail which kept it away from her face. She wore no jewelry at all.
She was the loveliest woman in the room.
Alec rose from his chair when the hostess brought her to him. She sat quickly before he could pull out her chair.
His heart hadn’t sped since he’d held found what remained of his beloved the night she died. He’d believed it quit working—even when he fed. But, tonight it worked just fine.
“You look very nice.”
She seemed to be having a little trouble getting comfortable, which was when he noticed the bandage on her forehead. In all of his planning for their evening together, thinking about her, and trying to decide why she’d come back to him, he failed to consider she would still be very hurt.
Humans were such fragile creatures. They broke so easily, and she had fallen down his steps.
He reached out to touch her hand and, when she didn’t flinch, he considered himself lucky. “Would you like to reschedule this? I can see you’re still quite uncomfortable. My man told me you would recover.”
She laughed gently. “And you thought perhaps that meant I’d be better in just over twenty-four hours?”
“Forgive me.” He was such an ass.
She waved her hand in the air. “It’s nice to be out tonight. In this place. I’ve never been here before.” Essence looked left and right. “I feel as though I’m having dinner in a work of art. Do you come here often?”
How could she ask him that, knowing what she knew? “Ah, no. Never before. I don’t usually have a need for it.”
“Why did you pick it for tonight? And why tonight at all? I mean, do you take all the girls who fall down your stairs out to eat? Thank you for the flowers. They were lovely. I like that book very much. How did you know?” She sighed loudly. “I’m nervous. I don’t usually talk this much, except inside my own head.”
Anxiety wafted off her. As a predator, he’d been reborn to know his prey. She didn’t have real fear of him. She’d also chosen to see him and hadn’t, seemingly, called the authorities or told anyone about him.
He cleared his throat. “What do you remember about what happened?”
Alec didn’t answer questions when he didn’t care to. He kept waiting for her to complain, but she hadn’t yet. Was she just that…easygoing?
“You were signing your papers then I woke up in hospital.”
She couldn’t have stunned him more if she’d sprouted wings and took off into the heavens. “You don’t know anything about what happened in between?”
Like, how I’m a vampire.
Essence shook her head. “Did I miss something important? I mean, other than my graceless fall?”
He rubbed his chin. “Nothing. No.”
Lying to her was a very bad start. But, it seemed the universe had given him a break. If she didn’t know, did he have to tell her? Couldn’t he earn her trust? Show her how he could be? Then tell her? What was the right thing to do?
The monster moved inside of him, and he pushed it away. He had no time for the beast tonight.
“Did you bring me here because you want me to sign something saying I won’t sue you? I won’t…sue you, I mean. I’ll sign whatever, if you want, to prove it. You don’t even have to buy me this ridiculously expensive dinner.”
He blinked. Sue? That was right. They lived—or she did—in a particularly litigious time. Yes, she might think he’d worry about that. Her eyes were so clear when she regarded him, so alive, so filled with promise.
“I asked you here because I wanted to see you…for a date. I wanted to take you out.”
She raised her eyebrows, which must have pulled on the bandage because she winced slightly. “Really? I must be a lot more interesting than I remember being.”
He laughed, which shocked him. He hadn’t done that in…one hundred years. He gripped at his chest. The sensation of laughter, he’d forgotten how it felt. Like a million sunshiny days.
“I’d like to get to know you better.”
Wishful thinking made him say the word ‘date.’ but everything he thought and said since had been truth. He did want to know her—this woman who shared his beloved’s soul, who made him laugh, who had yet to say a thing that reminded him of Constantia. His love had never stumbled, never faltered. Every word she’d said was purposeful.
Essence seemed to stumble through her sentences and fell down stairs when she should’ve been running for her life. For some strange reason, he found her delightful. He hadn’t expected to. So little was of interest in the long dark night of his existence.
“I’m really not interesting.”
The waiter came then to tell them of the specials which brought about the routine of ordering food. He had no idea what he would want to eat, were he to actually consume food. As it was, since she didn’t know he wasn’t human anymore, he would have to chew and swallow. Later, he’d suffer for doing so, but it would be worth it.
He quickly perused the menu. As a young man, he’d liked it whenever they could have fresh meat. Humanity—at least in first world countries—didn’t bother worrying about that much now as far as he could tell. He’d order that.
Essence told the waiter she’d like an iced tea and when he suggested she could have some wine, she declined, stating it wasn’t a good idea with the medicine they’d given her for pain. He cursed himself, once again, for being a fool. He needed to keep this evening brief for her comfort. She should be resting. Why was she out of bed at all?
She ordered a salmon dish, and he told the waiter he’d have the steak.
Alec motioned toward her. “Tell me about you.”
She sighed. “I’m afraid I’m really not more interesting than I seem, like I said. I was born in Texas, a small town right in the center. Not close enough to Austin or San Antonio to be exciting. My father is a local politician. He’s also a lawyer, but he doesn’t do much practicing. Mom stayed home and raised the five of us.”
Dad was a person in the public. Not ideal, but he could work with that.
“How often do you get to see them?”
She shook her head. “Not for years. Not since I left home. They don’t approve of me.”
Good
, the monster inside of him hollered. He didn’t want to share her with family. Alec forced that thought away. She was alone in the world when she should not be. Every young woman should have family to protect her.
“How could they not approve of you?” She was everything she should be.
“I left home to be a ballerina. That, to them, was akin to getting in bed with the devil. It was fine when I did it for activities at home. All the girls did. They didn’t even complain when I went to college on a dance scholarship. But, to actually try to do it—in New York, of all places? I went too far. They told me they’d never see me again. And they haven’t.”
Alec suddenly wished he could consume alcohol. It would be nice to take the edge off.
Ballet. There it was
. “But you did it, anyway.”
“I did.” She shrugged. “I’m not great at being what people expect me to be.”
The love of dance was the same, but there it ended. “Tell me more.”
A
lec seemed so genuinely
interested in her, but Essence didn’t know where to look. His dark eyes bore into her as though he could see her very soul. Maybe he could. She didn’t know.
“Did you have a favorite ballet when you were in college?”
He was so handsome and not scary, not like the time before. It must have been the whole night that had thrown her off. The rain, the building he lived in. “Um, I like one called The Firebird.”
Alec dropped his fork. He hadn’t eaten much. She wondered if he didn’t like the food. Her dinner was absolutely the best she’d ever consumed anywhere. “You’ve heard of it?”
He cleared his throat. “Once or twice.”
“Do you dislike the ballet?” Her father and her brothers had been bored out of their minds.
“I don’t, actually. But I used to be happy to go with…a woman who was very important to me. She loved to watch the dancing, and I loved to watch her.”
Sadness enveloped her. Alec was a man who had known pain. It radiated off him as clearly as the flower delivery man had emitted the scent of smoke. She could practically taste it.
“What happened to her?” Even as she asked, she knew. No one spoke of a former love the way Alec did if the lover still lived. Ending a relationship simply didn’t give off the same utter sadness.
He shifted in his seat. “She died. A long time ago. I’m sorry to bring down the whole evening.”
“You didn’t. I’ve talked so much about me. Talk about you. Tell me your story.”
One side of his mouth rose in a smile. “I’m not very interesting.”
She pointed her spoon at him. “I don’t believe you.”
“I was born in eastern Europe. The town I was born in doesn’t really exist anymore. That’s a long story.” She could tell it was by the way he looked away for a second. She didn’t mind. Other people were entitled to their secrets. He didn’t have to reveal all in their first dinner.
Essence rubbed the back of her neck. Did that mean she thought there should be a second dinner? He was a very rich man who was being nice to her because she fell down his stairs.
Somehow, she had to find a way not to make too much of this. “What do you do in that big house by yourself all day?”
“I…I’m a late riser. I guess you could say my body rhythms are just made that way. Most of my activity is at night. I prefer to conduct business then. Lately, I’ve been reading.”
He’d said he was a later riser which seemed to make her yawn. Before she could stop herself, she did. Alec sat straight up. “I’m going to get the check. You need some rest.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. It’s nothing to do with you. The medicine I’m taking makes me a little loopy sometimes.”
He furrowed his brows. “You don’t need to explain.”
After he paid, they stepped out of the restaurant onto the street. She rocked back on her feet. This part of the evening was always a problem for her. She pointed to the left. “My subway is that way.”
Alec shook his head. “I have a car. I would like to take you home.”
“Oh, no. I wouldn’t want to put you out.”
He took her hand in his, smoothing his thumb over her fingers. “I have nothing but time this evening. I’ll see you to your door.”
“My father would have loved you if you’d been around when I was in high school. Most of the boys honked a horn, wouldn’t even come to the door. Okay, you take me home.”
She no sooner spoken than she wished she hadn’t. In general, she never discussed her family, but now she’d done so twice in one evening. Essence had known she would make them upset but she never, in a million years, believed they would have written her off the way they did.
A car pulled up behind them. He hadn’t even had to call for it. Maybe that’s just how things worked for very rich people?
“Family is funny. We think we need them and, sometimes, if they’re worthy, we do. We don’t owe our parents anything for giving us life. Sometimes we think we do. I wanted my father’s approval more than anything. I had a funny way of showing it. It landed both of us in a great deal of trouble.”
She walked forward, placing her hand on his arm. “You’ve lost him, too. I’m sorry.”
He blinked rapidly. “Of course you’d know that. I obviously inherited his estate. Yes, he’s gone now.”
He opened the door to the car, and she got in. He scooted in next to her and, after a quick word with the driver, they were off. Quiet surrounded them and she didn’t, for a change, feel the need to speak. Alec had a way about him that said it was okay to simply be in his presence.
She yawned again, and he put his arm around her. His warmth surrounded her like a cocoon.
“This has been such a nice evening.” She really did want to thank him. “I can’t tell you how much I enjoyed myself.”
His grip tightened on her shoulder. “Enough to do it again?”
“Absolutely.” He wanted to see her
again
. She tried to keep her cool. He was probably used to women throwing themselves at him. Why was he bothering with her?
“Great. When are you free?” His profile was strong, his eyes straight ahead. He never flinched, never made a move. He’d been more relaxed in the restaurant.
When you get nervous, you become so still it’s almost frightening…
The woman’s voice, the one she didn’t know but kept hearing, drifted through the car. Alec didn’t seem to hear it and turned his head to her. “Essence?”
“What?” She hated that she was hearing voices. Maybe she should go see a doctor. Of course, even with her insurance, seeing the doctor had to be budgeted in advance.
“I asked when you were free.”
“Oh,” she rubbed the back of her neck. “I’m sorry. My mind wanders sometimes. Um, well, next weekend I’m completely open.” And every weekend after that. The men in New York weren’t exactly lining up to date her. She didn’t fit in.
“What about tomorrow?”
She turned to look at him. Was he kidding? Only an earnest interest showed on his face. “Tomorrow is Halloween. I was invited to go to a party, but I’ve cancelled because I doubt very much after a full day of working and my head still pounding on and off that I’ll be up for a party. So, no I have no plans.”
A muscle ticked in his jaw. “Who invited you?”
“A man I know a little bit.” Why was she justifying herself to him? It was none of his business. Still, she kept talking. “He asked me.”
“And you’ve cancelled.” He nodded. “Okay, beautiful. Tomorrow night. We won’t do anything too big. I want to make sure that you’re okay. Nine o’clock.”
He really liked to eat late. “Um, tonight was great, but I’m not sure I can do nine o’clock dinners over and over. I’m not used to eating very much and late meals can have a tendency to make me not feel very well.”
“Of course. I’d completely forgotten. Yes. You should eat earlier and we’ll do something else. Leave it all to me.”
The car pulled up to her building, and she got out of the car. Turning around, she expected him to leave her there but instead he exited the vehicle and followed her into her building.
“This is where you live?”
She pointed upstairs. “Second floor.”
The same muscles that had ticked earlier did so again. “I see.”
They travelled up the stairs together and then she opened the door. He once again followed her into the apartment for exactly ten seconds. After that, he stepped back into the hallway. “This is your apartment?”
At dinner he hadn’t asked so many obvious questions. “That’s right.”
“I see. Okay, goodnight, Essence. Please lay down and take care of your head. And, just out of curiosity, does your hip hurt?”
She stared down at her hip for a second. His question had thrown her. How did he know? “I have a bit of glitch with my hip. I injured it for the last time when I finally made it into a dance company. Put an end to the whole thing. It hurts sometimes, but I can’t afford the physical therapy. I’m mostly fine. Thanks for asking.”
“I see.” He seemed to like to say that a lot.
Not wanting to overthink it, she got up on her tiptoes and kissed him on his cheek. “Thanks for dinner.”
She closed the door before she could think too much about what she’d done.
* * *
T
he second set
of roses arrived at her desk the next day while she worked on a brief. This time, the delivery person was less chatty. He dumped the roses onto the side of her computer and walked away.
Essence looked left and right. It felt like every woman in the whole office stared at her. She stood up and tried to pretend her cheeks weren’t bright red.
A dozen roses yesterday and now a dozen today
. She pulled out the card and wasn’t surprised when it wasn’t signed.
The quote said quite enough.
“A self is not something static, tied up in a pretty parcel and handed to the child, finished and complete. A self is always becoming.”
― Madeleine L'Engle, A Circle of Quiet
Thank you for reminding me of this…
She breathed in to bring in the scent of the blood red roses. They were beautiful and romantic. And he’d once again quoted L’Engle to her. She shook her head. Why was he spending so much time on her?
When you do things you really do them over the top
.
Once again she heard the woman’s voice. Only, she was at work, and she didn’t have time to be crazy right now. She sat back down at her computer. The roses were lovely and they seemed like they belonged to someone other than her. She couldn’t put her finger on exactly why she had that ridiculous thought.
Once was okay. Twice was a theme. And she wasn’t a roses girl.
Maybe he didn’t realize that. They’d had a very expensive dinner the night before. Perhaps he’d come to think that was the kind of thing she needed all the time. But, she didn’t and, at this point, she had no idea how to even process two dozen roses in two days.
She stared at her computer screen. The words seemed to blend together like she didn’t know how to read. Who cared about property law when there was Alec and his grand gestures? She stared down at her phone. Lunch seemed like a really good idea or at least a walk around the block.
The problem was, she decided as she exited the building, she could easily be swept away by him. She could close her eyes, and he could be a perfect kind of prince. Even though such a thing didn’t exist in real life.
Blood and sex
.
Where had that thought come from?
* * *
A
lec paced
the length of his home. He’d been up for hours before the sun sank. The phone rang, which startled him, and he jolted over to where it sat attached to the wall. Essence had one of those cell phones, he’d seen it in her bag. She hardly had a place to live, but she had a phone that didn’t need wires. He should have gotten out of the house more in the last fifteen years.
“Hello?” He cleared his throat.
“Oh, hi. Alec?” It was Essence’s voice, and it stopped his discomfort immediately. How could she do that? Soothe his ache with just three words?
He needed to answer her. “Essence. Hello.”
“I hope it’s okay that I got your phone number out of your file. I know you don’t email. This is okay, right?” She was rambling. He couldn’t smell her fear, but he knew enough to hear it now. She was nervous to have called.
“Let me set you at ease. I am happy you called.” He actually was. Since he was awake, the problem with the sun seemed less aggravating. “Everything okay with tonight?”
He really hoped she wasn’t cancelling. He’d been looking forward to it, which was really surprising considering he’d not looked forward to anything in so long he couldn’t remember when he last had.
“Yes, I mean, if you still want to take me out after what I have to say.”
Alec sat down on the stairs. “That sounds ominous.”
“I loved the flowers. Thank you for them. But, you don’t need to do large things like that for me. I have the feeling you’re sending them for either the wrong reasons or like they’re for someone else. I’m not really a roses person. I don’t know how to do fancy. That black dress you saw me in last night? It’s the only thing I can wear to a place like that other than work clothes.” She took an audible deep breath. “I’m not really a two dozen roses girl. If that’s okay, I’d like to see you again.”