Blood Bond (PULSE, Book 5) (9 page)

“That's for Kalina to decide, isn't it?” Jaegar snapped.

“No, go for it,” Kalina muttered irritably. “After all, you need to eat, don't you?”

The waitress returned with two heaping plates of pilaf, but as good as it smelled, Kalina wasn't hungry. She had a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach as she watched the waitress simper and giggle as Jaegar lightly brushed the tip of her arm with his fingertips. “Do you still fancy showing me around the kitchen?” Jaegar asked smoothly.

“Of course! Come with me.” The waitress grabbed Jaegar's hand with a single, swift, decisive movement. She wanted him – that much was plain – and she was going to have him.

Kalina looked down at her plate as Jaegar sauntered off, happy to be led by the waitress into the back room. Kalina said nothing as she shoveled forkful after forkful of food in her mouth. Not even the rumblings in her stomach nor the spices in the meal were enough to take away this slow, sad, sick feeling. She knew that Jaegar was going to do more than drink from this girl – that much was clear – and yet the idea terrified her. She wanted to run after him, to stop him, to kiss him and tell him to stay.

“You know you're going to have to choose,” said Justin, patting her on the shoulder. “If you decide Octavius is the one you want, that means letting Jaegar go. Letting him find the chance to find love – and his humanity – somewhere else. With someone else who can love him completely, not just half the time. And if you choose Jaegar, the same goes for Octavius.”

“But...”

“I don't know what's going on with any of you. And I'm not judging – if you want to be involved with both of them, then do that. But then you're going to have to take the good along with the bad. They'll do their best to let you sow your wild oats – but you'll have to let them do it, too. Is that something you can live with?”

Kalina gave a deep sigh.

“He loves you, Kalina. Jaegar, I mean. I can tell. I may be a guy, but even I could pick up on the way that guy looks at you. If you wanted him, he'd be with you – he'd leave that girl in a heartbeat. But you hurt him – the way you sidled up to Octavius when we arrived, the way you kissed him goodbye. And I'd be hurt too.”

“It's complicated,” said Kalina in a small voice, feeling ashamed of herself. “I want to be with Octavius – at least I
think
I do. But it's hard. He's the only truly powerful vampire left in the Consortium – he's sworn an oath never to turn human until all the vampires he's turned can turn human, too. He needs to stay a vampire to protect humans and vamps alike. And that means giving up mortal pleasures. You know, like me.” Kalina's voice shook as she thought of Octavius, out there in the battlefield. Would she ever see him again?

“And Jaegar?”

“I thought I loved him too – but whatever I feel for him, I know now that it isn't enough. It wasn't enough to turn him human. He turned for a bit – but he turned back. The Blood didn't work on him. And even if it did...do I want to risk turning him into a raving psycho again like last time?”

Justin patted her hand. “And Stuart?”

She sighed as she thought of Stuart – so strong, so mature, so good. He had been a wonderful boyfriend, and yet he seemed to belong to another time. To a time when she was younger, when she relied on his chivalry and protection. Now she needed neither of those things.

“I feel guilty I never got to turn him,” said Kalina. “He wanted to be human more than any of the others. But I just didn't have those feelings.”

Justin gave a great sigh. “You're too young to have those feelings, Kalina,” he said. “You're eighteen. You should be playing the field – worrying about Mr. Right Now instead of Mr. Right. Human or vampire – you've got your whole life ahead of you to date, to experiment. For all you know, the person you end up with could be someone you don't even meet until five years from now.”

Kalina sighed. “Great –
more
people in my life.”

“Just enjoy what you have now,” said Justin. “Live in the moment. Don't worry about commitment – getting married, kids. If you find the right guy now, great. But to be honest I'd be worried if you did. You have to know who you are before you decide who The One is. If there even is just one. And they'll wait – even if they don't stop feeding. These vampires don't seem to have the same hang-ups about relationships that humans do. Just be glad you didn't have to decide between two or three human lovers.
Then
you'd have a problem.”

Kalina smiled. Justin always seemed to have such good advice.

“Thanks, Justin,” she said. “I guess I never had a mom to talk to about these things. Or a sister.” Images of Max flitted into her head.

“That's what I'm there for,” said Justin. “Your Mom, your Dad, your brother, your sister – all rolled into one – dare I say it? - attractive package.”

She squeezed his hand. “They'd be proud of you, you know.”

“Who?”

“Mom and Dad. You're the best brother a girl could ask for. And a good friend.” She wrapped her arms around him in a bear hug.

“Eat!” he prodded her. “Jealous or not, you need your strength. You can get mad at that waitress later.”

She reluctantly took another bite of her rice, conceding that – for all the waitress's faults – she
had
brought them some very good food.

“We need as much energy and strength as we can manage. To be honest, Kalina, all this is still pretty crazy to me. And it's definitely dangerous. If we weren't fighting to – to save humanity or the world or whatever – I'd tell you to just go home. To stay inside. To lock your doors and get ready for college. But these people here seem to need us. The vampires seem to need us. And I'm proud of you for doing what you need to do to help them. Just don't let it go to your head, sis.”

He gave a laugh.

By the time Jaegar arrived, wiping the faintest trace of blood from the corners of his mouth, Kalina's mood was much improved, and she managed to keep herself from glowering when the waitress gave him a seductive goodbye peck on the cheek, although she inwardly raged at the woman. The waitress brought out their bill and looked at Jaegar, a secret smile escaping from her lips. Jaegar returned the smile, and all of Kalina's hard-won serenity vanished as she began to seethe, the blood heating up within her veins. She wasn't going to let that waitress steal her man!

Chapter 9

A
s the waitress sauntered away, a distinctive spring in her step, Kalina turned to her brother. “Do you mind if Jaegar and I have a little...talk for a second?” Her voice was strained with jealousy. “We won't be long.”

“Go right ahead,” Justin shrugged, looking confused.

Kalina took Jaegar by the hand and yanked him to his feet, leading him imperiously out of the cafe. “Back soon,” she called to Justin as she dragged Jaegar out into the cafe's rear, which backed up against the verdant woods that they had seen earlier. When they were far enough from civilization – surrounded only by the fragrant leaves of the trees – she pushed Jaegar up against one of the trunks. Her mouth, hungry, sought his; her fingers pushed against the muscles of his chest. She fumbled with his buttons, unbuttoning one, then two, of his shirt-buttons; she moaned softly as her flickering tongue found his own. She wanted him, as she had never wanted him before; jealousy had created a strange, angry heat in her. She could not bear to envision him with another; images of him and that waitress entertwined in indelicate congress kept appearing in her head. She wanted to burn those images out of her mind, force them out by this rough, aggressive physicality. She was kissing his stomach – his flat, toned stomach – and then her lips had traveled up to his chest, his shoulders, his face. She would make him forget all about the other woman. She would bring Jaegar back to her.

Jaegar responded hungrily, groaning as he pulled her into him, his fingers digging into her back with a delicious shivering mix of pleasure and pain. His lips found her mouth once more; his desire for her was clear in every movement, every tiny tense muscle of his body. She knew he wanted her now, wanted her with the pent-up desire of all their time in Mongolia. He had watched her with Octavius but never been able to take her properly, never been able to have her the way he wanted. He wanted her now.

Their bodies sparked together, the friction producing a low, warm heat.

“I want you, Kalina,” Jaegar murmured into her shoulder. “You have no idea how much. You're like a drug to me – I can't get enough. Every little thing about you. The way you handled the villagers.” He marked this with a kiss. “The way you ran,” another kiss. “Watching you keep up with me – side by side. It was like we were in sync. Our telepathy, our bodies, everything linked together. Like it was meant to be. Like it was always supposed to be.” He gave a low, seductive laugh that gave Kalina chills. “You look so deliciously
ravishing
right now. The wind's gotten into your hair when you ran. It's messy. Sexy-messy. Your face is all flush; your cheeks are little roses. You look like a vampire who's just been turned. Full of vitality. Radiant. Like you've just...”

Kalina blushed.

“Afterglow,” Jaegar pulled her in once more for another kiss.

Kalina's blood began to burn within her, just as it always did. No matter what, Jaegar would always have that effect on her – he would always be able to make her weak at the knees, a slave to her own desires. Although she knew that Justin was waiting for them a few yards off, that didn't stop her from wanting to give into them – right here, right now. If it weren't for that stupid curse, she thought bitterly, she would take him right here on the forest floor, dirt and branches and all, so great was her desire.

“Kalina,” Jaegar said her name so softly, so tenderly. “God, it's crazy how much I still want you. In spite of it all.  I know you're with
him
now, but I can't care. I can't respect that. You haven't turned him yet – you haven't turned anyone yet – and so I can only assume there's still hope. There's still hope for me. That you love me.”

“I do,” Kalina admitted it. “I do love you. Or at least – every time I'm around you, I find myself wanting you so much. SO very much. When you went away with that waitress just now, I swear, I was so jealous. Like, crazy-jealous. I wanted to hurt her – to drag her off you and punch  her in the face.”

Jaegar laughed. “My little warrior,” he said, kissing her forehead. “You shouldn't have worried. I swear, Kalina, every second that I was with that woman I thought of nobody but you. I was imagining that it was your blood I was drinking.”

“
With
her?”

“I could only bring myself to drink from her. Nothing more. In the old days we would have done.absolutely everything...but I don't have a hunger for that anymore. Or at least, I do – but the only person I'm hungry for is you. I'm miserable with everyone else, Kalina. I don't want to be with anybody but you. And you know it. I can't even try to pretend I'm not; you can see me through and through. Your blood looking into my blood. Feeling what I feel. Knowing me inside and out. I don't know if it's your blood or if it's you – whatever it is, I still love you. Still want you.”

“Jaegar!” She quieted him with a kiss. She just wanted his mouth on hers again. No words. No interruptions. He pressed his mouth against hers once more, desperate deep kisses that sent her head spinning.

“You drive me crazy, woman,” Jaegar said. “But it's worth it. I'll wait for my chance to get you. No, not wait. I'll ask for it –
demand
it. I want you to give up Octavius, damn it. I want you to forget the others. Make me yours. Make me human again. I don't need to be a vampire. I don't need that power anymore, that beauty. Once we fight off Molotov and restore all the Life's Blood Carriers, we won't need to be vampires anymore. We can turn back. We can live as humans, you and I.”

“But do you think it's possible?” Kalina thought back to the last time she turned him, when he had turned back.

“You haven't turned Octavius yet – so I still have hope. That your love will work next time. Maybe it was just not enough blood before. Maybe we need to...you know...during...”