Bliss Series Boxed Set: The Whole Damn Harem (60 page)

Sam

Time stands still the moment I lock eyes with Sean in the bustling hospital corridor. We just stand there staring at each other for what seems like an eternity until my brain finally kicks into gear and I turn to leave.

“Sammy,” he says, stopping me in my tracks. I take a deep resigned breath and turn back around to face him—my biggest regret in life.

“Sean. Long time, no see,” I say confidently. My mom always told me to tackle each difficult situation with confidence, grace, and a ‘take no prisoners’ attitude. That advice got me through the police academy and gained me my ‘Ice Queen’ reputation it seems. Unfortunately, the pensive expression on his face shows he sees right through the façade.

“Are you here visiting?” His eyes drop and I watch as he does a full body scan before returning his stormy-blue gaze back to mine. I struggle to hold back the tremor that surges through me. He still affects me deep to my core.

“Yes, my partner and I were the first on the scene today when Ryan was assaulted,” I explain. I’m impressed at my ability to form coherent sentences in front of him, let alone being able to converse intelligently.

As he lifts his arm and grips the back of his neck, I take the opportunity to look him over. By God, he has aged well. No, scratch that, he has aged
fucking
well. His dark brown hair is cut short, matching the strong, unyielding personality I knew he once had. When we were together, Sean was a commanding force to be reckoned with. He could always walk into a room and own it within seconds.

When I look at his face again, I’m met with piercing blue eyes that threaten to unnerve me. I square my shoulders, creating an illusion of strength. I can tell that something is troubling him. His chiseled jaw is clenched tight like he’s trying to rein in whatever emotion is consuming him.

Just as an uncomfortable silence stretches between us, he quirks an eyebrow at me and his eyes crinkle slightly.

He just caught me checking him out.

C’mon, you can’t fault me. I’m a woman nearing the peak of my sexual prime. I haven’t had an orgasm in four days, and I’m standing in front of the man who unintentionally ruined me for any other man. Something I’ll never admit to him.

Ever.

“You were there first?” he asks incredulously.

“That’s what I said,” I retort. My defense mechanism emerges from her dreamy Sean trance, stepping into her bitch panties and wearing them with pride.

His gorgeous eyes widen, but he quickly recovers. “Why?”

I know he’s assessing me, watching my reactions like a hawk. “I joined the academy after college. Been with Chicago PD ever since.” This conversation is as awkward as I knew it would be. Is it ever easy to talk with someone who you can’t admit still holds a place deep inside you? A man who you never allowed yourself to have a chance of a future with? Yeah … no!

“I’m getting the impression you’re still a hard ass too. At work anyway …” His gaze drops to my mouth, not missing the moment I drag my tongue along my suddenly parched lips. It’s a nervous habit that I’ve never been able to shake, and it’s obvious that Sean remembers too because his eyes flare quickly before returning to mine. Putting his hand in his pant pocket, my attention is drawn to his chest, his hips, his ….

I shake my head and catch the slight curl of his lips into an irresistible smirk. Dammit, he’s still the master mind reader he always was.
Right, Sam, snap out of it.
You’re here to check on Ryan then you can go to Helen’s and get reacquainted with your friend Vodka.

Hang on.

What did he mean by ‘at work anyway’?

“You look well, Sam,” he adds, suddenly putting a crack in my armor with a simple compliment. “Had I known you were still in Chicago … well, I would have—”

“I’m just going to pop into Ryan’s room and make sure he’s okay.”

His body jolts and I definitely don’t miss the look of disbelief that shadows his expression. He studies my face, unnerving me to the core. “Do you have plans tonight?” His confidence is unmistakable as he waits for my answer.

An unexpected wave of warmth spread through my body from the fact that he wants to see me again. He’s gotten to me, just from a simple five minute conversation. I feel like I’m against the ropes with little to no options of winning. My eyes widen as I look at his lips again. “Yes.” My voice shakes slightly and the slowly growing smile on his lips tells me he did not miss it. “I’m going to my friends’ place for dinner.” I look down at my watch and realize that visiting hours will be over soon. “Sorry, Sean, but I’d better get to Ryan before visiting hours end. Great to see you again though,” I lie through my teeth. It’s fucking terrifying and thrilling at the same time.

He steps back, not appearing rattled or shocked by my act. “I see,” he murmurs. “Well, thanks for helping Ryan this afternoon. I know it’s your job, but he was knocked around a bit and it must have made him feel better knowing you were there. I own that club, so if there is anything you need … professionally, or any questions that need answers, please don’t hesitate.” He’s all business now as he pulls out his business card and hands it to me. I look at him and then the card before taking it in my fingertips. When my hands brush against his, the energy between us is palpable.

I adjust my purse on my shoulder and stand straight, almost eye to eye with this foreboding and gorgeous man from my past. In a split second that gives me no hope of evasion, he takes a step forward and wraps his arm around my waist, resting his hand on the small of my back and bringing my body close to his. Kissing my cheek, he brings his mouth so close to my ear that I tingle with the sensation of his warm breath on my skin.

“Until next time, Sammy ...” He kisses a spot just below my ear, turning the tingle into a full body shiver of the good but embarrassingly obvious kind, before he steps away, pulling his arm away and walking down the corridor away from me.

I stand there dumbstruck, replaying the whole scene that just played out between us.

Then it hits me.

He could tell.

One look, a few exchanged words and a brief physical interaction and he could tell.

Fuck a duck and stuff me with a feather. I never could fool him, not with a simple fib or a lie by omission. He always knew. Right from the beginning he’d told me that he loved my backbone and sass but when it was just the two of us behind closed doors, I was his. Now the one thing I couldn’t admit to myself back then, the part of me he wanted to nurture, just revealed itself to Sean in all its glory.

But that’s in my past, and I realized a long time ago that as hard as you try, you can’t change what has gone before. You can only learn from it. And this time, Sean’s the one walking away from me, not the other way around.

Irony sucks ass sometimes.

I take a deep breath and walk down the corridor to the nurses’ station, asking directions toward Ryan’s room.

When I find him, he’s staring out the window looking lost. His vacant stare and downturned mouth seem unnatural on his face. This is Ryan, the guy who always used to liven up the mood of any room he walked into. He’s the happy go lucky to Sean’s intense and broody. The combination always made for a good time. But looking at the man lying in the hospital bed in front of me, all I can see is a lone man who looks like he’s lost everything.

“Ryan?” I say hesitantly. He slowly turns his head toward me and his body goes rigid in surprise, then relaxes again, although the wince I see cannot be missed. “How are you feeling?” My voice is still soft. I’ve had a lot of practice dealing with victims of crime, but something tells me that this is something else, something important that I’ve missed.

He shrugs his shoulders and turns his head back to the window. “Did you see my brother?” he asks, his voice flat and without feeling.

“Yeah, I did. Not my favorite thing in the world I must admit.”

“Why’s that? You two haven’t seen each other in what … ten years?” He still won’t look away from the window.

I sit down on the bed beside his legs and gently put my hand on top of the blanket to get his attention. “Ry, did something happen? With Sean?”

He slowly turns his head and stares at me as if I have two heads or something. His eye is almost swollen shut and he has a bandage around his head covering his wound. He studies me for what seems like forever before he asks, “Are you here as a friend or as a cop, Sam? Because the answer to that will determine my answer to your question.”

My eyes widen in surprise. I’ve never been asked that before so I’ve never had to consider it. But Ryan was my friend, Sean’s brother, and right now, I’m guessing he needs a friend. I shake my head. “As your friend, Ryan. Please tell me what’s going on so I can help you.”

He gives me the slightest of nods before taking a slow, measured breath. “Sean basically just washed his hands of me, just before you arrived.”

I gasp. No, that can’t be right. The two of them are the only family they have left. “No …”

He lets out a laugh then gasps in pain. “Shit, that hurts. Yep, my brother has finally had enough of my shit. He’s sick of being the father, the brother and the fixer-upper.” He looks back out the window and I know I’m losing him again.

“Ryan, Sean loves you. You guys used to be so close and you’re working at the club. He wouldn’t just walk away.”

He jerks his head back to me. “Did you not see him walk away a few minutes ago? God! He was yelling so loud that the nurse had to call security. Your precious Sean has decided he’s done and what he says goes, so he’s leaving me to deal with my own shit and I don’t blame him. I’m in a lot of debt, and I think that’s what today at the club was all about. Robbery gone bad is what it looks like but that guy was there to rough me up and send a message. Well, message fucking received.”

He takes a breath again, then sighs loudly. “Maybe you should go, Sammy. You seem to like leaving when the going gets tough. Oh wait, nope. You just leave when someone dies and we need you.”

I swallow to try and rid myself of the large lump that’s made itself home in my throat. Fuck! No wonder Sean looked at me with a wariness that I’d never seen him with before. Although there is probably a lot of anger there too. It was a long time ago, but my departure from their lives was sudden and a shock. I had to cut all ties for my own heart. But that’s another story for another time.

“Ry, I didn’t mean for it to happen like that. I’m sorry. One day I might tell you about it, but in all honesty, that’s between Sean and me.”

His eyes follow me as I get off the bed and stand up. “Sorry, it’s none of my business. Please …”

I’m suddenly taken back to Ryan as the impressionable seventeen year old boy I met all those years ago.

“I’ve got to get going, Ry.” I reach into my pocket and pull out a business card with my numbers on it. “But here’s my card. If you need me, you call. Maybe I can help with Sean. I don’t know whether he’d be receptive to talking with me, but if you want me to I’ll try.”

Seeing Sean again must have fried my damn brain. I’m volunteering to act as a go between for the Miller brothers. Wonders will never cease.

Or maybe, subconsciously, I just want to see Sean again.

Vodka. I need Vodka, stat!

“Drink You Away”

Sam

“More Vodddkaaaa,” I mumble into my glass as I down my fifth drink. How did I get here?

As I was leaving the hospital, I sent Helen a text telling her I needed a drink
—
or ten!—and that I was on my way. See, that’s what is so great about having a best friend who is exactly like you. A simple text of ‘I need Vodka stat. Just saw Sean’ tells her everything she needs to know and why.

On my way to her place, I couldn’t get Sean and our not entirely unexpected but still surprising conversation out of my head.

Sean was always able to elicit a reaction from me. Whether it was riling me up, shocking me, or more often than not, turning me on with a single heated look. I could never read him though. He was always unexpected, but positively so. Despite his tragic family loss at such a young age, he was strong and in control. He had dreams and aspirations, he saw what he wanted and went after it without hesitation.

And the day we met, what he wanted and went after was me.

∞~~~∞

It was our junior year in college. We were two pre-law students sitting on opposite sides of the auditorium and squaring off during a political science class. The impromptu debate over the effectiveness of the modern Republican idealism was thrilling, infuriating and heated. Sean’s cocky smirk and laid back demeanor was evident as he traded barbs and opinions back and forth with me. In the end, the professor had to get us to agree to disagree, but even from across the room, our chemistry was undeniable.

When the end of class came, I was still riled up, the adrenaline from the exchange coursing through me, so I was too distracted to notice him come up next to me. When I stood up with my bag and leaned forward, I caught the underside of his chin with my head on the way up.

“Fucking hell, woman, no need to hurt me.” I regained my balance and stood back, looking up into the most captivating blue eyes I had ever seen. Close up, Sean’s face was all male; angular with a strong jaw, and the most kissable lips I’d ever seen. I lost myself in his gaze, but I didn’t miss the curling of his lips.

He held out his hand for me to shake. “I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Sean Miller, the stubborn and argumentative man who had the pleasure of arguing with you today.” His grin got impossibly bigger as I stood there, equally taken aback and turned on by his candid approach.

Looking down at his hand, I shook my head to clear the hot guy fog that was threatening to take over, and put my hand in his, gripping firmly. My mother’s words of appearing strong and unwavering echoed through my mind. “Sam, Sam Richards. Pleased to meet another steadfast student.” I pulled my hand away when the heat radiating from his tall, foreboding body started to get to me. “Sorry, but I have to get to my next class.”