Read Bliss Series Boxed Set: The Whole Damn Harem Online
Authors: B.J. Harvey
She turns around and faces me, putting her hands on her hips. “Well, lucky for us, Danny boy cooked this before he went back to his place.”
“Oh, thank the lord for Superman. He saves the day again,” I reply with a huge grin. “You could take lessons, you know. Surprise Daniel one night by cooking a tasty meal that doesn’t give him food poisoning.”
“It was one time! God, you guys will never let me live that down, will you? It’s not my fault that the shrimp were past their expiration date.”
I walk into the kitchen and grab a wine glass, pouring myself a nice big glass of Merlot. “It kind of is, you know. Number one rule of cooking, fresh ingredients. Oh, and the ability to actually cook helps a lot too.” I wink before ducking a flying dish towel.
“I miss wine,” she says, eyeing my glass with envy as she takes a seat at the kitchen counter.
“C’mon, you wouldn’t change it for the world.”
“Nope, to be honest, I wouldn’t. And after the ultrasound in a week or so, we can finally confirm that it is a girl and not a boy, and I’ll be a happy mama,” she states proudly, rubbing her rounded belly with glee.
“You’d better be careful. Some of that southern twang is rubbing off on you,” I giggle, knowing that she’ll take the bite.
“I’ll have you know that I love that southern twang rubbing off on me. Anywhere, anytime.”
“Gross! It’s bad enough I have to listen to it. I don’t need to be told about it, especially when I’m not getting any.”
Mac suddenly gets a suspicious look on her face, a look that fills me with dread and also makes me wonder what the hell she’s up to.
“What’s this all about, Mac? You, cooking me dinner, planning an impromptu girls’ night in...what’s the deal?”
She feigns shock and gasps in mock horror. “I’m hurt, and frankly, disappointed that you’d doubt my intentions, Kate. Can’t I have a nice night in with my best friend? Since Daniel and I got back together, I know I’ve been a bit slack at this whole roommate thing, so I wanted to make up for it. You’ve always been there for me through everything, and I think it’s time I was here for you.” Her voice breaks.
I put my glass down and round the kitchen counter, wrapping my arms around her from behind. “I know you’re always here for me. Whether you’re with Daniel at his place, or with him here. You’re like the sister I never had, and Daniel is like my adopted big brother. Please don’t feel bad because you’re happy. You deserve happiness,” I add, with an extra squeeze. My eyes fill with tears. I’m going to end up being a blubbering mess.
“Now, can we stop this cry fest and eat? I’m starving!” Mac announces.
∞
∞~
Having eaten our way through garlic bread, lasagna and a delicious baked cheesecake for dessert, both Mac and I are parked up in the living room, claiming a couch each as we lie down in food comas, watching some crazy game show on television where people are training to become ninjas.
“I could never be a ninja. My big belly would get in the way,” Mac muses.
“I don’t want to be a ninja. Although, I’d always be willing to date a ninja. Can you imagine the positions that they could get into? Oh my god, I just thought of one. The reverse saddle ninja!”
Mac sits up excitedly and faces me, bending one leg under the other. “No, wait! Can you imagine a ninja doing downward facing doggie style? They could probably hang upside down from the roof while fucking you. That would be awesome,” she says with a laugh.
“I know! Instead of the Vibrating V, it would be the Ninja Nooner, or Ninja Nookie!” I say, struggling to talk through my laughter.
Mac looks at her phone briefly before putting it down and looking at me.
“Everything okay?” I ask, looking at her phone.
“Oh… yeah, great. Just checking the time. But right now, we need to talk about you.” Mac sits up and rests her hands on her stomach. I’m kind of envious of her right now, but I won’t admit that.
“Why’s that?” I say, intrigued. Definitely didn’t see the conversation shifting from ninja sex to me. If I were having ninja sex, I’d be a happy camper. Actually, sex of any kind would be happily accepted right now. Anything other than the one handed dialing of the ol’ pink telephone. I should be buying my batteries in bulk with the frequent use my purple, pearl vibrator has been getting this year.
“Hon, what happened with that Spencer dude? And don’t say nothing. You haven’t talked about him, and you came home early on Saturday night and drank yourself into a tequila fueled stupor before crashing out and suffering from the mother of all hangovers on Sunday.”
Ok, she’s got me there. How do I explain this without hearing I told you so? Is it even possible?
“Well, after I sent you the text saying everything was okay, we had a lovely entrée and then the mains arrived. He was sweet and attentive, and was asking all the right questions, and I really thought he wanted to get to know me. It was going really well…”
“So? What happened then?”
“He answered a phone call from his wife during the main course,” I say, biting my lip as I await the expected outburst from my best friend. The outburst that doesn’t come. Her face goes soft, and she looks at me with tears in her eyes.
“Oh, hon. I’m so sorry.” She gets up and sits down on the couch beside me, putting her hand on my leg. “It sounded as if it was going so well. Despite your freakout early on,” she adds with a slight smile.
I let out the breath I was holding. “It was going okay, but it seems that he was just looking for an extra-curricular activity, or maybe another one. I’m starting to think that the waitress was acting weird because he does this often.”
“He’s a slime ball, and I hope he gets crab infested nuts!”
“Me too. Anyway, I think I might like someone else…”
“Hang on, what? Have I been so self-absorbed that I’ve missed a new man in your life? I’m so sorry, hon. Seriously, I suck!” Mac says, shaking her head.
“No! You’re fine. Great, roundly awesome.”
“Did you just call me ‘roundly awesome’?” She looks at me in shock.
“Maybe,” I reply with a giggle.
“Oh no, you didn’t,” she says with a shake of her head.
“Anyway, I’ve met someone online. Well, not met him, but I’ve been talking to him for a few weeks now and he’s pretty cool. Down to earth, easy to talk to, and he’s funny and kind of dirty. Well, in my drunken haze on Saturday night I remember him being dirty, but I freaked out on him and haven’t spoken to him since.”
I expect to get an earful about how I’m setting myself up for a fall, and how I should give this internet dating ruse up, but I don’t. I look over and see an all knowing grin on Mac’s face.
“What? No Makenna lecture about life? No I told you so speech?”
She holds her hands up in surrender. “Nope. I’m not saying anything. This guy sounds pretty cool. Why haven’t you met up with him yet?”
I sigh. “That’s the thing. I suggested on Saturday morning that maybe we should meet up, but he said that he’d like to get to know each other a bit better first. I mean, when did I become the guy in all of this?”
“I dunno, but it’s kind of sweet, don’t you think? He’s not just looking to get laid. Well, if he is, he’s willing to put the leg work in first. You’d gotta give him credit for that.”
“I suppose. I didn’t really think of it like that. To be honest, he’s been pretty laid back and easy going. And when we chat, it is effortless. There’s no pretending, no thinking required. It just comes naturally.”
“Isn’t that what you want in a relationship? Easy, effortless, natural? That’s what Daniel and I have. Well, now we do.” She’s blushing. It’s cute that they miss each other even when they’ve probably only been apart for a few hours.
“That is what I want. I just think I’m a bit impatient. And horny, definitely freaking horny.”
“Well you do have the three date rule for a reason. It worked for me and as much as I resented it at the time, I wouldn’t change a thing about it now. So how about you take your time with this guy? Feel him out before you get to feel him out if you know what I mean.” She winks, then starts to stand when there is a knock at the door.
“Oh, I wonder who that is?” she says, walking toward the door.
I frown in confusion. She opens the door and all I can see is the 6 ft. 2, dirty-blond haired star of my sexy dreams with a satchel across his shoulder and a huge duffel bag in his hand.
Forgive me, God.
I think I’m about to kill my best friend.
“Funhouse”
Zander
When Mac opens the door, my eyes dart from her big smile to Kate who’s sitting on the couch behind her. It hits me that she had no clue that I was coming over, let alone staying for a few weeks.
“Come in,” Mac says cheerfully. I step inside and drop my bags by the door. “Kate, you remember Zander, don’t you?”
“Ah, yeah, of course. Hi, Zander.”
The way she says my name sounds like sex dipped in honey and I can’t take my eyes off her. She’s wearing a hot as hell V-neck red blouse that makes her fiery red hair appear brighter if that’s even possible. She’s more beautiful than I remember; she’s the woman from my fantasies, and she’s sitting right in front of me.
“Hey. The bemused look on your face makes me think you weren’t expecting visitors?” I look at Mac and see a guilty but gleeful spark in her eye. She’s trying to play stealth matchmaker, and Kate is the innocent party who has no clue.
“Not exactly, but I’ve never stopped Mac from inviting her friends over,” Kate says, shrugging her shoulders.
“Come sit down, Zan. Do you want a beer? I have a Millers in the fridge, and I’m sure Daniel won’t mind.” Mac points to the couch while walking toward the fridge.
“Sound goods, babe.” Shit, I’m so used to calling Mac that. I should probably stop.
“So, what are the bags for?” Kate asks with interest as I sit down.
“Well-” I start to explain before Mac jumps in, handing me the beer bottle.
“Zander’s idiot roommate burned their kitchen, so their apartment is smoke damaged as well as kitchen-less.”
“Oh, shit. I hope he’s okay,” Kate says, bringing her hand up to her mouth.
“It’s alright, they’re safe. Zach was entertaining and got sidetracked,” I say with a laugh. At least I can laugh about it now. I was not laughing last night when I got home from the gym to find my building surrounded by fire engines and a sheepish looking Zach and his mortified lady friend standing on the sidewalk. “The smoke alarms went off, and they were able to get dressed and get out. Zach’s just embarrassed about the whole thing now. The firefighters were pretty pissed when they found out the reason for the fire though,” I explain.
“Well, that’s lucky. So what are you going to do?” Kate asks, leaning forward toward me. I don’t miss the body language, or the sly full body scan either. Seems my firebird likes what she sees, THANK GOD! It would make things even more awkward if she was pissed at me.
I look over at Mac, waiting for her to say something. “So I was going to talk to you about it tonight, but we kind of got side tracked with ninja sex talk and food comas,” Mac explains. “But I offered Zander my room for the next few weeks while I trial living with Daniel. I didn’t think you’d mind since you know Zan and you know I wouldn’t let just anyone move in. I know I should’ve run it by you first, but it was kind of fortuitous since I was already thinking about my living situation given this.” She circles her rather round pregnant belly with her hand.
“Wow, you’re getting kind of big there, Mac. How many you got in there?” I ask, genuinely interested.
“You did not just call me big, Zan. That’s like the number one rule when dealing with a hormonal pregnant woman. NEVER call them big. Like EVER. You’d better watch out because we’ve been watching ninja wannabes tonight. I’m sure I could kick your hot ass.”
“You’re not allowed to call my ass hot anymore, Mac. And anyway, you’ve got your own personal superhero. No man can compare to Thor, or whatever his name is. What do you call him again?”
“Superman! Anyway, Kate, what do you think?”
I look back to Kate, realizing that Mac and I just slipped straight back into our old playful banter that never fails to make me laugh.
“God, you two are funny. Don’t stop on my account,” Kate says, sitting back and looking at the two of us.
“Oh, stop! It’s because he’s younger than us and so immature,” Mac retorts, poking her tongue out at me.
“Sorry, triplets was it?” I reply with a smirk.
Kate and I crack up laughing at the same time when Mac pouts and whispers sweet nothings to her belly about how mean Uncle Zander is being and not listening to me before standing up.
“I’m just going to grab my bag and call Danny boy to come pick me up. I’ll come back and show you where everything is after that. Zan, is that alright? You okay with this, Kate? I know this is all very sudden,” she asks with a raised brow.
“Yeah. It’s sweet. You need to get over yourself and just move in with Superman already, so this trial will be good for you, and I know it’ll make Daniel happy.”
“See, Zan, this is why I love this girl,” Mac says, bending down to kiss Kate’s cheek before heading down the hallway.
“Anyway, I’m fine with you staying,” Kate says to me in a quiet voice. “I just hope it’s not uncomfortable for you to stay here with me. You know, after that night.” I look at her in shock. I see her knee bouncing ever so slightly, and then my gaze hits her face and I’m taken aback by how nervous she looks. She’s biting her lip, and it’s one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen.
I’m done for.
A thousand cold showers couldn't stop the party starting in my pants now. All I can think about is lightly scraping my teeth along her bottom lip before soothing the sting with my tongue. Thoughts of holding her in my arms, her naked body flush against mine, fill my head.
I realize that I haven’t responded to her, and dammit, she definitely needs a response if she thinks for one minute that I’m uncomfortable around her. I lean toward her, waiting until I have her attention before clearing things up.
“Babe, there is nothing that has happened that would make me uncomfortable around you. Not one damn thing. If anything, I want to get to know you better, so get that out of your pretty little head, and we’ll be fine. Absolutely fine.”