Blind Delusion (14 page)

“Don’t worry about me, Dr. Renee. I can take care of myself. Ciao,” she said and gave Renee an air kiss before walking out of the ladies lounge.

‘Live until you die.’ Cha-Cha’s advice made good sense. Perhaps her stylist should be the one getting paid to listen to other people’s problems. Renee went back downstairs to find Bill. She couldn’t take it anymore. Her head hurt and she wanted to go home. Renee didn’t even bother to sit down at the table but leaned over Bill’s shoulder and whispered to him that she was ready to go. His brows furrowed together when he squinted up at her, eyes now red from too many drinks.

“Damnit, Renee. We’re still talking business. Cliff’ll be back in a minute. He went looking for LaToya. Jesus Christ, I don’t even know why I brought you. Can’t you entertain yourself for another hour or so?”

Yes, she could find some way to entertain herself while he discussed business, as she thought of Cha-Cha and Ian in the VIP room upstairs. But, instead of telling him what was on her mind the way Cha-Cha would have,
tears welled in her eyes and burned her cheeks. She tasted their saltiness at the corners of her mouth. Her entire body felt hot from rage. She sensed everyone’s eyes on her. The only thing she trusted herself to say was that s
he was leaving and would see him at home later.

Renee almost ran up the stairs. She anxiously waited for the elevator to take her up to the main lobby. Once in the lobby she retreated to a corner, dried her eyes and retrieved the cell phone from her purse. She pressed the programmed code to Remy’s Sedan Service and hoped her driver could run her home on such short notice. Otherwise, she’d ask the front desk to call her a taxi. Remy picked up on the first ring and from the background traffic noise she could tell he was on the road. Luckily, he was between pickups and said he could be there anywhere from 5 to 10 minutes. She asked the concierge to let her know when her driver arrived. Then she sank down in a carved wooden chair to wait. Lost in her thoughts, she didn’t see Deek walk up.

“Are you okay, Renee?” he asked and sat down in a chair beside her.

“I noticed you looked upset so I followed you. Was it stumbling in on the premiere of ‘Deep Throat I’ that bothered you?” He looked genuinely concerned. “I’m sorry, I should have insisted on leaving right away instead of getting into it with Mathias back there.”

She looked away so he wouldn't see fresh tears forming. “No, that’s not it, Deek.”

“What is it then? What can I do to help?”

“Shouldn’t you be getting back to your friends?” she said, avoiding eye contact, “Don’t bother about me.” Before he could respond, Bill appeared.

Deek stood up to face him.

“What the hell are you doing here Detective?” asked Bill.

“Same as you, I assume. Supporting the Boys and Girls Club.”

The muscles in Bill’s face tensed as he spoke, “I warned you over the summer to stay away from my wife.”

“Look man, Renee and I are just friends. Anyway, she seemed upset so I wanted to find out if she was alright.”

Bill lowered his voice to a whisper as he glared directly into Deek’s eyes.
“Understand this, Hamilton. Any fool trying to take what’s mine will find his punk-ass stretched out on a slab with somebody trying to match his dental records. I got connections. You just might not recover from your next bullet wound.”

“You’re the fool. Who would be stupid enough to threaten a police officer and one whose been assigned to an FBI task force at that. You’re not the only one with connections, Buddy.”

“Let me clue you in on a few things, Detective. Renee and I may be having our problems but she’s still my wife.”

While the two men argued back and forth, neither noticed that the concierge had summoned Renee to tell her that her driver had arrived. When they stopped bickering long enough to look for her, the black Lincoln town car was pulling away.

“Where is she?” asked Bill.

“You just missed her,” said Deek, pointing outside, “She had her driver take her home and if I were you, I’d go after her.”

“Well, you’re not me. And don’t worry about my marriage. Renee’s just moody this evening for some reason. Not that it’s any of your fucking business, but our marriage is stronger than ever.”

“Whatever you say, man.” Deek turned and walked away.

Chapter 10
 

R
enee woke from a fitful sleep when she heard the garage door downstairs slam shut. It took a few groggy moments for her to recognize the guestroom’s periwinkle blue walls and antique white sleigh bed. Suddenly, she replayed what had happened at the ball that night and remembered why she didn’t want to wake up next to Bill. Bill had been emotionally distant for weeks. Now she understood why. He had been too busy plotting and scheming with his new partner, Clifton Shaw, to remember her birthday.
Despite her disappointment with how things had turned out on an evening that she had mistakenly thought was intended to celebrate her birthday, Renee fought against the urge to phone Deek for comfort. She couldn’t deny how good it felt running into him at the fundraiser dinner. Still, it wouldn’t solve anything to get entangled again in a romantic relationship outside her marriage with a much younger man. Been there, done that, she thought and all it produced was guilt-ridden, sleepless nights.

She heard Bill’s heavy footsteps lumber up the stairs. She tossed the covers aside and ran out to confront him just as he reached the top of the landing.

“It’s two thirty in the morning. Where’ve you been all night?” she said in a voice that made her wince. She sounded too much like those whining wives in therapy that she dreaded listening to every week.

“I have a headache and I’m tired. Can we talk about this tomorrow?” He reached for the door handle for the master bedroom.

“It is tomorrow, and yesterday was my birthday!”

“Oh, shit,” Bill dropped his head in his hands. “Baby, I’m so sorry. You know how hectic things have been lately trying to get this company off the ground. Shaw leans on my cell phone 24-7. Please forgive me. Let me make it up to you, Sweetie.”

Bill reached for her but she backed away. “Don’t bother. I can’t believe you actually forgot my birthday and we just talked about it the other day.”

“I know but …”

“What’s the matter, forget to take your Ginseng? Or is there someone else on your mind these days?” she eyed him suspiciously.

“Hell no. I don’t even remember my own goddamn birthday. That’s just how little birthdays matter to me.”

“Well, they matter to me. The years are flying by and I’m not getting what I need out of this marriage, emotionally or physically.”

“Neither am I, quiet as it’s kept. But you don’t hear me complaining,” Bill answered. Then he paused before continuing. “Guess I may as well tell you now since you’re up,” he said. “I’m leaving for Bangalore, India
later this afternoon for about a week. I’ve got to bring back our new recruits and make sure they get settled. Their first training class starts Monday after next. Shaw wants to get things rolling now that our investor has laid down so much cash.”

“What? You’re not serious?”

“Listen, Renee, I’m finally well on my way to becoming one of the black elite business owners in this town. This is probably my last chance to make it big. I’m damn near 52 years old. My PC customization company turned out to be nothing but a sinkhole and a huge headache. Another opportunity like this might not come around for me again at my age. You’ll see. Before long I’ll be calling the shots.”

She rolled her eyes towards the ceiling. “If you say so.”

“Look, I gotta get some sleep, babe. The limo driver’s picking me up at 4:00
PM
,” Bill checked his watch. “I’ve got to be at Dulles two hours before my 6:40 flight.”

“There’s a million things I need to do before I leave: get my currency exchanged, check on the guys’ work visas, touch base with Cliff, stuff like that,” he said, “I’ll only be gone six days, Sweetness. Just an in and out trip. I’ll make all this up to you when I get back next Thursday, promise.”

Renee threw up her hands. “I must be the stupidest woman alive to put up with your bullshit. I talk to women in denial every day. I show them why they should leave an intolerable, hopeless situation but they just keep coming back for more. Then I have to hear about it again and again and again. Guess I’m no better off than my patients since I, too, seem to be exhibiting the same type of cognitive dissonance.”

“Look Renee, I’m really beat. Can we not have a therapy session tonight? It’s almost time for me to get up and I haven’t even slept yet.”

“Whose fault is that?” Renee stormed off without waiting for his response. She returned to the guestroom where she promptly locked the door. She wished there was some way to retrieve her silk underwear and the letter she mailed yesterday inviting him to a romantic dinner tomorrow night. As it turns out, he wouldn’t even be home. She crawled back into bed then tossed and turned for several more hours before drifting in and out of sleep. Renee wondered if it was really worth the effort to try to repair her marriage. How would she ever convince Bill to adopt a baby as long as neither of them felt satisfied in their marriage? And was it fair to bring a child into their unhappy home? She felt her time running out. If she didn’t become a mother soon, it would be too late.

At 7 o’clock Friday morning, the skies threatened rain but Renee decided she needed a morning jog to help relieve the tension from her argument with Bill last night. She changed into a jogging suit and zipped a small bottle of Evian water inside a fanny pack belted across her hips. Fortunately, Bill had already left the house to run errands and prepare for his trip, so she managed to avoid seeing him. Renee stepped out into a hazy, blue-gray morning. The air felt cool as she jogged along the winding, neighborhood roads. Roads flanked by tall trees, their branches wrapped in misty clouds. Renee quickened her pace and after about twenty minutes of running, she had worked up a sweat. Suddenly, a car appeared out of nowhere. A mass of black metal raced by at a speed well over the residential ten miles per hour. Her balance wobbled and she fell hard to the gritty pavement.
Damn you, moron!
The car had come dangerously close to hitting her but whizzed by too fast for her to get a tag number. She brushed off her knees and started to limp back home.

She labored up the long winding driveway’s sharp incline that led to her house. Dense thicket and a grove of evergreen trees populated the grounds and bordered the driveway. The excessive foliage was designed not only for its landscaping beauty but also to hide the front and rear entranceways. It gave the Hayes couple a false sense of privacy from voyeurs who drove through their neighborhood just to gaze and drool over the sprawling estates of others.

Upon approaching the narrow, red brick path leading to the rear entrance of her office, Renee suddenly stopped and listened. She thought she heard rustling coming from a tangled patch of bushes near the doorway. She scanned the entire area for any sound or movement. There was nothing but stillness. Must have been falling leaves or a squirrel, she thought and continued up the path. Just before sticking the key in the door and unlocking it, she turned to look behind her. Renee blinked a few times to focus—not sure if her mind had conjured up this vision or if the figure standing behind the bushes was real. A mosaic of thick, multi-colored leaves shielded what appeared to be a motionless shadow.

Renee quickly unlocked her door and opened it just enough to squeeze inside; then slammed the door shut, locked, and bolted it. She leaned against the door for a second, and took a deep breath. After gaining her composure, she ran to the front foyer and turned the security alarm on. Usually she was diligent about activating it. But this morning she had forgotten to turn it on when she left for her run. Renee recalled her terror this past summer upon finding a burglar in their home before the security system had been installed. She’d been lucky once only because the person wasn’t interested in harming her. She might not be so lucky the next time. Whether the vision outside was real or imagined, it was a wakeup call for her to be more careful.

Renee glanced at her watch. In an hour her secretary, Brenda would be arriving to setup for the day’s appointments. She gulped down several sips of Evian water and grabbed a ripe pear from the kitchen table’s arrangement of apples, pears, oranges, bananas, and grapes. That was just about all the breakfast she could tolerate after last night’s ordeal at the fundraiser ball. The only good thing about it was running into Deek. She noticed that her stomach had been feeling queasy over the past several days. She attributed her waning appetite to depression and stress. Renee dragged herself upstairs to shower and get ready to face another morning of listening to her client’s problems and complaints. Could she be facing career burnout? Lately, she dreaded listening to the same stories over and over and in some cases zoned out during a therapy session. Or was it simply that her own personal problems were becoming too great to allow her to focus on someone else’s troubles?

Chapter 11
 

D
r. Renee Hayes descended the stairs to her basement office, wearing her typical workday uniform—comfortable black slacks and cardigan with a white shell. The soothing melody of Mozart’s piano concerto in A major and the aroma of fresh-brewed coffee greeted her at the door. Her secretary, Brenda Johnson had made a good choice of music selections this morning. She heard the steady clicking of fingertips on computer keyboard coming from the waiting room area. Renee popped her head into the reception area to see Brenda who in turn gave her boss a friendly good morning and a happy birthday greeting.

Brenda had arrived early enough to perk Renee’s favorite Gevalia® coffee and fill up the pewter pot and tea set. Next to the coffeepot sat a vase overflowing with white phlox and lavender. Renee’s Japanese housekeeper, Chizuko Tanaka, had come yesterday. Every Thursday she arranged fresh-cut flowers and their bouquet always smelled aromatic. Renee retrieved a porcelain teacup and saucer from the credenza. She chose the strong coffee over tea to combat morning drowsiness from yet another sleep interrupted night. She took a huge swallow and the hot liquid burned her throat, but the jolt revived her.