Bless Us Father (33 page)

“Here we are, face to face after all these years,” Maggie said, hands on her hips and fire in her eyes. “I’ve waited a long, long time for this and I don’t care where we are, you’re going to hear me out and at least apologize.”

“Please, Mrs....you don’t understand,” the younger priest said, putting a hand on her shoulder.

Maggie reached up and slapped his hand away. “Oh, I understand all right. It’s taken me many years, but I finally understand how he ruined my life. I thought it was my fault, but it wasn’t. It was all his fault.”

“That’s right, you good Catholic people,” Maggie said, turning towards the small group that had stopped nearby. “Listen up and you’ll hear all about how the good Father Antonio Velasquez took my life away.”

“Let’s go somewhere private, Mrs....I’m sorry, I don’t know your name,” the young priest said.

“Father Antonio knows who I am, don’t you Father?”

“Que pasa?” Father Antonio said, looking at the young priest.

“Nothing, Father. Don’t trouble yourself. We’ll go back home.”

“No entiendo,” Father Antonio said, looking from the young priest to Maggie and then back at the young priest.

“You do too understand, you pervert. I’m Mary Margaret Riley. You molested me when I was a young girl. You certainly do remember me and you know exactly what’s happening.”

“Mrs. Riley. Father Antonio doesn’t remember you or anyone else for that matter,” the young priest said, speaking in a low voice. “He’s had Alzheimer’s dementia for two years now and he seems to have regressed back to the days of his youth in Colombia. He doesn’t know anyone here and he never speaks English anymore.”

Maggie wrapped her arms around her waist, feeling as if she’d just had a fist slammed into her midsection. She took a step back and looked closely at Father Antonio. His formerly dark hair was now salt and pepper gray, though he still had a full head of hair. His eyes were dull and didn’t reveal even a flicker of recognition. She took a few more steps backward, and bumped into a man standing behind her.

“I’m so...sorry,” she said, bowing her head and fleeing back to the relative safety of Javier and Sadie. She almost fell when she reached the bench, caught herself, and sat down next to Javier. She covered her face with her hands and began to cry.

“What? What is it, Mamita?” Javier asked, taking his handkerchief back out of his pocket. “Who were those priests?”

Maggie accepted the offered hankie and dabbed at her eyes. “That was Father Antonio. I don’t know who his little friend was.”

“The Father Antonio? I weel keel him,” he said, making a motion as if to stand.

“No, Javier, you don’t have to kill him. He’s already dead.”

They sat in silence for a moment, then Javier said, “But, I don understand? He look alive to me.”

“Oh, Javier. I waited too long. It’s too late for an apology. He has Alzheimer’s and doesn’t remember anything. It’s over.”

Maggie allowed Javier to put his arm around her and pat her consolingly. For the first time in many years, she didn’t feel the need to pull away. His touch warmed her soul.

“Let’s go get breakfast, Javier. I’m hungry now.”

She stood, squared her shoulder, wiped her eyes, and led the way back to the parked car. This wasn’t the ending she had hoped for, but in some ways, it was the right one. He remembered nothing about those years. Maybe someday she would be able to forget it, too.

True peace is not merely the absence of tension, it is the presence of justice.

-Martin Luther King, Jr.-

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

Monday morning found Maggie, Javier and Barbara back in the conference room in the building on Grand Ave. Barbara was astonished to hear of Maggie’s encounter with Father Antonio. The Los Angeles Archdiocese had been vague about where Father Antonio was during the negotiations, but no mention had been made of him having Alzheimer’s disease.

“You can both stay in here until the actual settlement amounts are read. At that time, I’ll ask one of you to leave the room while the amount is given and the papers are signed, then you can change places,” Barbara said.

“Why can’t we be here together?” Maggie asked.

“For privacy issues, that’s all. You may get different amounts and that way you won’t know what the other person got.”

“I don’ care if Maggie get more than me. It not a problem,” Javier said.

“And I don’t care, either. I’d feel better if Javier were here with me,” Maggie said. “Besides, we’ve shared all our secrets these past two days, so we both know what went on with the other.”

“Fine with me. I don’t think the judge will care, either, but we’ll ask,” Barbara said.

The three were alone in the room, waiting not so patiently for Judge Nicholas and the Archdiocese attorneys to arrive.

“So Barbara, what you theenk the amount of money will be?” Javier asked. “Maybe I buy new truck?”

“Oh, Javier, you’re going to have enough money to buy the biggest truck you’ve ever seen!” Barbara said, laughing.

“I don’ need big truck. Jus leetle one to haul stuff around my ranch.”

“Do you think we’ll get a few hundred thousand dollars?” Maggie asked. “I could live pretty well on that for the rest of my life.”

Judge Nicholas entered the room followed by the attorneys for the Archdiocese. They sat directly across the conference table from Javier, Maggie and Barbara. The two attorneys took out their yellow legal pads and pens, nodded to Barbara, and waited for the judge to begin the proceedings.

“Thank you, ladies and gentlemen for joining me here this morning. I know you’re all anxious to hear what’s been decided, so we’ll get right to the point and ask you to sign the paperwork, then you can be on your way,” Judge Nicholas said.

Maggie held her breath, not sure why she was so nervous all of a sudden. This money wouldn’t make up for all the problems she’d had in her life up until now, but it certainly would make life a little easier from here on out. She wouldn’t have to budget so much, and maybe there would even be enough so she could help her daughter get established in life. She certainly owed it to Kelly.

“Mr. Lopez, I believe I’ll start with you. We’ve been in negotiations for quite some time, as you well know, and now we’ve divided the settlement money up in as fair a manner as we possibly could. I’d like to start by explaining to you how I decided on the sum you will be awarded. Is this clear so far?” Judge Nicholas asked.

“Yes, Sir, I mean Judge,” Javier said, his voice trembling a bit.

“I’ve reviewed all the documents thoroughly, and I believe that this is fair. You certainly suffered a terrible injustice at the hands of Father Timothy. This injustice was compounded by the fact that the Los Angeles Archdiocese failed to act on what was being done to you and the other young boys in your parish. That being said, you were able to move beyond the evil that was done to you and you lived a fairly normal life. You married a good woman, had a long marriage, and raised a nice family. Is that correct?”

“Yes, Judge, it is.”

“Thank you, Mr. Lopez. I also understand that you haven’t been a religious man since the molestation occurred, and that you’ve lost your faith as a direct result.”

“I lost my faith in church, Judge. Not God.”

Nodding, Judge Nicholas continued, “I understand. But because of that, you’ve never been able to enjoy the comfort that organized religion brings to many people.”

The room was so quiet Maggie was afraid the others could hear her heart beating. It felt like it was going to jump out of her chest.

“So, Mr. Lopez. I have papers here for you to sign for your part of the settlement. You will be awarded $900 thousand dollars.”

Judge Nicholas handed the forms across the table for Barbara to review prior to Javier signing them.

Maggie looked at Javier, who was sitting with his mouth open and staring at Judge Nicholas.

“Is this true, Barbara?” Javier asked, finally recovering from the shock. “This much money is for me?”

“Yes, Javier, it’s true. Of course there are legal fees that will be taken out of it, but you will still have enough money to be able to live comfortably for the rest of your life as long as you plan well.”

“Madre mia,” Javier said, leaning back in his chair and fanning himself with his handkerchief.

“Mrs. Riley, are you ready?” Judge Nicholas asked.

“Yes, Your Honor, I am,” Maggie said, sitting up straight in her chair and taking a deep breath.

“Your case is a bit more complicated. You suffered lifelong consequences as a result of your molestation that interfered with all of your relationships. In addition, you had issues with alcohol and drug abuse, promiscuity in your early years...”

Maggie averted his eyes and looked down at her hands, a flush of shame and guilt heating her face.

“...all understandable given the abuse you suffered, both mental and physical. Then you went on to have three failed marriages, and multiple physical ailments your doctors attribute to post traumatic stress disorder. And now you live a lonely and isolated life.”

Tears fell from Maggie’s eyes onto her folded hands. Finally, someone understood just how difficult her life had been.

Barbara perfunctorily patted her on the back. Javier reached across Barbara and handed his handkerchief to Maggie who then dabbed at her eyes and composed herself.

“So, in light of the suffering you’ve endured over all these years, we have decided to award you $2.8 million dollars, Mrs. Riley,” Judge Nicholas said, then handed Maggie’s forms over to Barbara.

Maggie clutched her hands to her throat as the blood drained from her face. Her breath was coming in short gasps and she thought she was going to faint.

“Can we get her some water, please?” Barbara asked to no one in particular. “Come on, Maggie, take a deep breath. Slow and easy now.” Barbara rubbed her back in gentle, reassuring strokes.

Javier handed her a bottle of water and Barbara opened the cap, offering it to Maggie.

Maggie took a deep breath and accepted the water. She sipped a tiny bit, then said, “I’m okay now. It was just such a shock. I never imagined that amount of money.”

“Well imagine it now, Maggie, because that’s what you’re getting,” Barbara said, smiling brightly. “Your life is going to change. If you allow it to, that is.”

They signed the forms and Barbara explained the process. The money would be deposited into her law firm trust account, the attorney’s fees deducted, then the money would be available to them in about thirty days. She advised both of them to hire a financial advisor to assist with managing their money.

“That’s it, we’re finished here. You can both go back to your homes now if you like, or take a nice vacation,” Barbara said. “Come on, I’ll drive you back to the hotel.”

They followed her to her car, rode back to the hotel and said their goodbyes to Barbara, then walked slowly to their rooms, stopping first at Javier’s.

“You driving home to Hemet now?” Javier asked.

“Soon as I pack up. I may as well. There’s nothing left here to do.”

“We go same way. I just go pass you turnoff to Hemet. You wan follow each other? Maybe stop along the way for eat somesing?”

Maggie smiled at Javier, “Yes, I would like that. I’ll be ready in about a half an hour. I’ll meet you in the lobby when we check out.”

As she packed her clothing and toiletries, Maggie realized she still had a bit of unfinished business to attend to before she could put it all behind her. She had to go back to the scene of the crime, so to speak. She hadn’t been inside the rectory house since she’d quit her job and fled from there so many years ago. Something was calling her to return. Maybe Javier would go with her. If not, she’d just have to go it alone.

She loaded her car, but didn’t put Sadie inside, since the weather was still ghastly hot.

Javier was just leaving his room when she walked by on the way to the office.

“I thought of something I need to do, Javier, and I’d like you to go with me if you will. Of course you don’t have to if you need to go home. It won’t take very long, but I don’t want to be a burden to you,” she said, avoiding his eyes, afraid of the rejection she might see there.

“No hurry, Maggie. I don need to go home yet. My son there taking care of everythin. Where we go?”

She sighed, then took a deep breath before answering, “I need to go back to Saint Catherine Laboure Church one more time. I must walk into the rectory and exorcise my demons.”

“Exorcise? I don know about that. I don like demons,” Javier said with alarm.

Maggie laughed. “I don’t mean literally. Figuratively. I have to let it all go once and for all and I can’t do it from my home.”

“Okay, Maggie. We go. I go with you to say goodbye to the evil. Then we go back to our little homes and start new lives.”

It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.

-Oscar Wilde-