Blaze (66 page)

‘That's an understatement. I wrestled with it for a long time, and now I've suddenly decided and it seems the right thing to do. I won't have regrets. I'm only sorry I'm getting out ahead of my contract.'

Ali cut in, holding up her hand. ‘Hey, no worries. Your life comes first, Larissa.' She didn't want to say she'd get someone in to replace her as quickly as she could. It struck Ali that finding someone to do her bidding and yet take on the responsibility and unstinting workload of Larissa may not be so easy.

Larissa guessed Ali's first reaction would be to plan her replacement. Well that was her problem. She wasn't going to make any recommendations. She wouldn't wish Ali on her enemies. And Ali really had no idea how much of a burden Larissa carried in the office. Especially her role as mediator, soothing the ruffled feathers and hurt feelings that Ali constantly engendered.

‘What triggered this decision?' asked Ali, genuinely curious.

‘I was giving Miche some advice about relationships and their importance when I realised I should be listening to my own counsel.'

‘You know something, this could make a story,' mused Ali. ‘A lot of women face this kind of crisis, right?'

Larissa wasn't sure if Ali was serious, but firmly dismissed her involvement. ‘Unfortunately it's the case, but not my story thank you.' She gazed at Ali and, to her surprise, found herself asking, ‘Do you face this sort of crisis, Ali? What keeps you awake at night?'

Ali tensed slightly and for a moment Larissa thought her remark had pierced a chink in Ali's famed armour-plate. Just as quickly it closed and Ali was flippant. ‘Not a lot. I take pills if I have to.' She turned her attention to the papers on her desk. ‘Okay, let's do some housekeeping. I'll make the announcement at the editorial meeting on Wednesday. We'd better run through what you've been working on.'

For the next fifteen minutes they talked amiably and professionally about the changeover. Then Ali rose, obviously intending to walk Larissa out the door where Belinda sat, unaware of the bombshell Larissa had just dropped. She shook Larissa's hand, a gesture that surprised her. ‘I hope you'll be happy. Good luck, Larissa. In a way I envy you.'

‘You do?' Larissa was shocked to hear Ali say it.

‘That you have the choice.' Ali hesitated. ‘Yeah, but I can live with that. See you.'

Larissa turned away wondering what else Ali had learned to live with. Somewhere in her past was something that had the power to disturb her cool and collected demeanour. Something that stopped her deviating from the path she'd chosen. And just then she'd come close to letting her guard drop.

The following day Nina rang Ali. Once Ali had been told of Nina's safe release she had put her to one side of her mind. But Nina's voice had a new vibrancy to it. Even down the phone line her enthusiasm was catching. Ali sat up straighter in her chair and began making notes as Nina relayed the gist of her experiences.

‘Nina, back off from the children's home. Repeat the stuff about being held. What you're saying to me is you were held as a suspected spy?'

‘That's what they thought. I mean, it wasn't me – it was the old journal. It could have caused a political embarrassment . . .'

Ali felt the excitement growing. She knew Nina herself, the most famous magazine publisher in the world, was the story – not what she might have found out about her family. There'd been a brief burst of publicity over Nina's detention and release. Now it was time to run the real story. Ali could see the shout line on
Blaze
's cover –
‘Exclusive!
Blaze
's Nina Jansous writes – My ordeal as a captured “spy” in Croatia
'.

‘Did they mistreat you?' Ali was looking for grisly details.

‘Emotionally and mentally it took a toll, yes.'

‘I can't wait to read your story. How soon can you send? We could drop a spread and start on a TV campaign for the issue. Can your friend email his photos to us?'

Nina saw where Ali was going with her story. ‘Ali, I don't want to play up that part of my trip any more. It was really just a misunderstanding, if a lengthy one. The authorities and I came to an agreement. The deal is that I write about all the positive things here. And it's a beautiful country. Combined with my personal discovery, I think there's a lot more richness to this story than the one about me being detained.'

‘Nina, come on. This is a fantastic scoop. We can really run with this. Do you have good pix? Any from inside the place you were being held? The guys who interrogated you? The story has politics, intrigue, sleuthing and family drama, you know. Top stuff. We'll sell heaps.'

Nina's enthusiasm cooled. ‘Ali, I don't want to be pressured. And I don't want my copy changed without discussion, and I want to know every detail of what you're doing with publicity.'

Ali was soothing. ‘Sure, Nina. This is such an opportunity for us to cross-promote your story and achieve coverage everywhere. When are you leaving there? We can arrange for a film crew to interview you when you return to Paris, New York, wherever.' She avoided mentioning Sydney.

‘I don't think I want to do that, Ali. Wait until you read my story. I'm glad you sound so keen,' added Nina wryly.

Ali changed tack. ‘Nina, if you can see your way clear to giving us the story so we can get it in the issue we're compiling now, that would be so great. That is, if you can do it. I know you haven't written for a long time . . .'

The dig hit home. ‘I'll see what I can do, Ali. We've just had a wonderful couple of days on the Dalmatian coast. I'm leaving for Paris in the morning. How is everything there?'

‘No probs. Going gangbusters,' said Ali cheerfully.

‘I'll be in touch. Can you transfer me to Larissa please.'

Ali hesitated for a moment then said, ‘Nina, Larissa has just resigned.'

‘What! Why?' The shock reverberated from Dubrovnik.

Ali was matter of fact. ‘No surprise, really. Couldn't stand the separation from her guy. I think she's going to marry him. From a career point of view, she's been there and done that.' Ali's voice had a faintly disparaging tone as if Larissa had reached her use-by date and choosing marriage and kids was a last option. It would never be an option for Ali. She had decided many years ago never to have children. Marriage would only be when it suited her and would bring her what she wanted most – security, extreme wealth, position and power. Realising the effect her news must have had on Nina, she added insincerely, ‘Larissa's been fantastic of course. But that old biological clock is ticking. It's no big deal. I have a few very able people in mind as deputy.'

Nina bit her tongue. Losing Larissa was a very big deal. Certainly she was happy for her if marriage and babies was what she wanted, but she sensed there was more to Larissa's decision. ‘Why now, though? While I'm away?'

‘Her man is moving to a new job interstate, so it's a now-or-never kinda thing.' Typical of Nina, thought Ali, to think Larissa would wait until Nina was back to ask permission. Too controlling. Who cared about other people's personal lives? They were there to do a job. She had made it a rule never to become remotely involved in the private lives of her staff.

‘Any other news I should know about?' asked Nina with a touch of irony.

‘Circulation is up. Thanks to one of the new writers I hired.'

‘That's good to hear. Please transfer me to Larissa so I can give her my congratulations.'

‘I look forward to reading your story, Nina. Let me know about the pictures.' Ali switched the call to Belinda. ‘Nina for Larissa.'

‘Nina! I'm so relieved you're okay. I really want to talk to you. I have so much to tell you.' Larissa was surprised at the surge of emotion she felt at hearing Nina's voice. More than she'd felt when she'd broken the news to her family that she was coming back home and planning to marry Gerard. They had been happy for her, but terribly surprised. Nina and Miche had been closest to her turmoil over Gerard. They understood the choice was not easy for her. They knew the lure of the magazine world, the stimulation of creating an issue from scratch each month, the adrenaline hit of creative and pressured energy. The people, the travel, the inside news. It was a heady world to exchange for suburban life.

‘I know. Ali just told me. Are you sure, Larissa?' she asked gently. ‘I know Gerard is wonderful, but it seems . . . well . . . sudden.'

‘I'm sorry to leave before my contract is up out here . . .' began Larissa.

‘That's not my concern. I just want you to be sure the trade-off is what you want.'

The brightness disappeared from Larissa's voice. ‘You know me too well, Nina. No, I'm not totally sure that I want to be wife, mother, whatever and move to New Hampshire, give up my career. But I am sure about Gerry. It's been coming for a while and I guess . . . a lot of other things helped me to decide. I don't think I'm meant to be a top editor.'

‘Nonsense. You're next in line when an opening comes up. But Larissa, I want you to be happy. Your career will always be there waiting for you.'

‘Will it, Nina? You and I both know it's changing. Even Ali had better watch her back. You never think it's going to happen to you. That one day you're not ahead of the race, but trying to catch up with new young sprinters.'

‘Larissa, you sound tired. I bet you've been doing more than your share of work. Has Ali been difficult?' asked Nina bluntly.

‘Not so much with me. But I'm tired of being a buffer all the time. She is a hard taskmaster. Clever, I admit. But too clever sometimes.'

‘Meaning something I should know about?'

Larissa hesitated. She didn't want to dump on Ali and worry Nina, and there was nothing reprehensible, immoral or illegal that Ali had done. ‘She always has
Blaze –
and therefore her own – best interests at heart. It's her style, I guess. And there is a constant war between her and Reg. Look, don't worry about it, Nina. Are you happy? Tell me your news. Where are you? We were so worried when you dropped out of sight for so long, what happened?'

‘You'll read all about it in
Blaze,
' said Nina dryly. ‘But I am blissfully happy with Lucien. Hard to believe we've come together after all these years. I don't know how we're going to juggle our lives together. He has a rather mobile career too. I confess the more I'm away from
Blaze
, travelling and just being with him, I find I'm enjoying this totally new experience. But I'm not taking my hand off the tiller by any means. I'm about to leave for Paris with Lucien then I'm going to New York for a Triton board meeting. Lucien will meet me there.'

‘And then back here?'

‘Not necessarily. Unless you think I should?'

‘I think you should.' The words were out before Larissa thought. It was an instinctive reaction, so she didn't try to diminish what she'd said.

Nina was thoughtful. ‘In that case, I think the sooner I return to Sydney and see for myself what's going on the better.' The news of Larissa's abrupt departure had shaken Nina and she realised she had taken her hands off the wheel for too long. While she didn't resent Larissa suddenly choosing to put her personal life first she knew that, for Larissa to leave while still under contract, things must have been very difficult. ‘It sounds like Ali's ambitions have gone to her head. At least the circulation figures have stayed high.'

‘I'm sorry, Nina, I feel I've let you down. Maybe I should have tried to contact you sooner, but Ali wasn't about to listen to me . . . and I assume you know she's been in contact with Baron Triton.' Larissa didn't want to repeat the gossip that Ali had bedded the Baron.

‘That's an editor's job. When the editor-in-chief and publisher is out of the picture, the editor should talk to the proprietor over important, substantive issues,' said Nina calmly. Larissa couldn't help thinking she slightly stressed the words, ‘important and substantive'. ‘Larissa, I know you did as much as you could. If anything seriously dangerous had been undertaken I know I would have heard from you. Did you share any of your concerns with Jacques?'

‘He is very much aware of Ali's machinations. I'm frankly surprised they went head-to-head over some things. I figured Ali would use her feminine wiles with the handsome proprietor's son. Jacques has divided the camp somewhat, but Ali, to her credit, has fought for her position and views. She cares about the magazine because it's helping her power base. Jacques dabbles at being an executive but he's more into being a serious playboy.'

‘Yes, it must be hard to be taken as credible and responsible with the stigma of nepotism hanging over your head,' said Nina, who knew very well of the concerns Baron Triton had about his son and heir. ‘I'll make plans. I'd appreciate it if you don't mention I'm coming. When are you leaving?'

‘As soon as I can – if that's okay with you? Perhaps we can overlap in New York? I'd love to see everyone. And there is one small detail to finalise.'

‘If you have any problems with your contract . . .'

‘No, it's not that. It's Gerry. He doesn't know I'm coming back to marry him. He gave me an ultimatum and sort of dropped out. I rang his mother and he's shuttling between New York and finding a place in New Hampshire. I figured I'd better grab him before he changes his mind.'

‘Just walk in the door and surprise him?' laughed Nina.

‘Yes. I hope he'll think it a nice surprise,' said Larissa, her heart twisting as frightening images of walking in and finding him in bed with another woman sprang to mind.

‘I'm thrilled for you. Things will work out for you, I just know it,' said Nina firmly. ‘Let's meet in New York. Belinda has the schedule. Is Miche staying on in Paddington? Is Miche okay . . . is she selling stories?' Nina had decided to tackle Ali's refusal to hire Miche later when she got to Sydney. As long as her goddaughter was happy, it could wait.